SpongeBob SquarePants/Season 9
- Seasons: 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 | Movies: The SpongeBob SquarePants Movie / Sponge Out of Water / It's a Wonderful Sponge | Main
SpongeBob SquarePants (1999-) is an animated TV series, airing on Nickelodeon about the adventures and endeavors of the title character and his various friends in the fictional underwater city of Bikini Bottom. It spawned a movie, followed by several short films, and video games.
- This episode's focused on SpongeBob and Patrick.
- SpongeBob and Patrick: What was that?
- British Gentleman: Why, those are the Dwastic Wadicals, the #1 practitioners of extweme spowts. [sips tea]
- SpongeBob and Patrick: Extreme what?
- British Gentleman: Extweme... spowts.
- Patrick: "Extreme spots"? Well, that's no fair. You're already covers in extreme spots. Ooh, hold on a second. [hive buzzing, Patrick screaming, electricity crackling] Okay, let's do meet our new heroes.
- SpongeBob: Ready, Patrick? On your mark, get set... jump rope!
- Patrick: Extreme! [starts jumping] Hey, who's holding the other end?
- SpongeBob: I am, of course.
- Patrick: [Pan to the right] Oh.
- SpongeBob: Hi, Patrick!
- Patrick: D'uh. [blows harmonica, starts singing] My best friend is SpongeBob.
- SpongeBob: Yeah!
- Patrick: He has a square head.
- SpongeBob: Sing it.
- Patrick: I try on his clothes while he's asleep in bed.
- SpongeBob: Yeah...! What?
- Patrick: That's weird, my face is leaking.
- SpongeBob: Your face isn't leaking. You're just sweating from all the exercise.
- Patrick: EXERCISE?! [stops] Eww, I didn't sign up for this! [faints]
- SpongeBob: Extreme!
- SpongeBob: Explosive, huh? I know just the thing! [dips bubble wand and blows bubble. Bubble pops] BOOM! [SpongeBob and Patrick make several explosion sounds] Impressed?
- Drasticals: No.
- Johnny: Look dudes, to be extreme you gotta go bigger. Show 'em, Drasticals! [Granny climbs huge bottle of bubble soap, dips huge wand and puts it in front of a ramp] Watch this! Yatter![Rides motorcycle into bubble, speeds into town and knocks over a building. Bubble pops and he gets crushed] Extreme. [Tunnels back, hops out of the ground] Now that's how you do extreme! You understand?
- British Gentleman: As you can see, extweme spots are the diwect bi-pwoduct of the most extweme spowts.
- Patrick: Who is that guy?
Squirrel Record (1.2)Edit
- Record Robot: Please hold this end. [SpongeBob holds the end of the ruler as the robot stretches high] 35 feet. Record broken! [SpongeBob flies up to the ceiling, crashes making him fit in his helmet]
- SpongeBob: Ouch!
- Record Robot: Take a picture.
- SpongeBob: Say "cheese"!
- Sandy: Cheese! [Sandy saws a giant part of the tooth off of her top tooth and slides down] Picture!
- SpongeBob: Here you go.
- Record Robot: 656... 657... Oh, the artificial humanity!
- Author: Thank you. Yes. Oh my... well, then... I'm afraid you've broken no records.
- SpongeBob and Sandy: Huh?
- Author: This book is 30 years old. These records were broken ages ago. You, however, have sent a brand new record: Most injuries sustained while helping a friend.
- Sandy: Good for you, SpongeBob.
- SpongeBob: [cracks] Um... hooray.
- Author: Say "cheese"! [takes a picture as the episode ends]
- Note: This episode's focused on SpongeBob and Sandy.
- Man-Ray: Muhahahahahahahaha! [Display case falls on her] Huh? [action card shows: Mermaid Man and Barncale Boy!] The inescapable display case! [bangs on the case] Noooooooooo!
- Barnacle Boy: [shakes Mermaid Man's hand] All in a day's work, eh, Mermaid Man? [both superheroes face the screen]
- Mermaid Man: Remember. It's up to you to reveal the true face of crime. Sign up to be part of the Mermaod Man and Barnacle Boy Junior Crime Fighters. [Patrick turns off TV]
- Patrick: I gotta figure out what to do in my life. [Patrick steps on Mermaid Man plush toy that says]
- Mermaid Man Toy: Fight evil!
- Patrick: [picks up the toy] Awww, I wish I was a superhero. [Patrick's eyes burst in then back out] I know what I want to do with my life! To the changing room! [rushes to the changing room followed by a real starfish spinning towards then away from the screen; scene cuts to Patrick pulling out his underwear and putting it on over his pants. Patrick then attempts to put a belt with a buckle with a star on it on, but is hard to put on because of his fat body. He then succeeds and clips the buckle in place; his body fat then bursts in between his belly and his moobs. He then grabs a giant ice cream cone from SpongeBob's fridge, suddenly with 2 blue gloves on his hands, and eats the ice cream and a portion of the cone. With ice cream on his mouth, he then slips this cone on his head and bulges his eyes through it. He grabs a jar of seanut butter and writes a "Y" on his chest, backwards, with seanut butter on his tongue] At last, I have found my calling. I am Patrick-Man, DEFENDER OF BIKINI BOTTOM!
- Mr. Krabs: Mr. Squidward, what's with all the dilly-dallyin'? We got custumer's money to take!
- Squidward: Where? [The Krusty Krab is empty]
- Mr. Krabs: [gasps] Where is everybody?
- Patrick-Man: [The doors open and he appears at the doorway] Fear not, Patrick-Man is here!
- Mr. Krabs: Patrick! I knew our #1 customer wouldn't let us down. [Patrick-Man comes towards Mr. Krabs to covers his mouth and begins shushing him]
- Patrick-Man: Shush! It's "Patrick-Man", Mr. Krabs.
- Mr. Krabs: "Patirck-Man"? What kind of ridiculous name is that?
- Squidward: Oh, forget the name. Look at the 'ridiculous' outfit. What is that, a pair of briefs? [he and Mr. Krabs starts laughing as Patrick looks down at his underwear. Then SpongeBob comes out of the kitchen]
- SpongeBob: Ooh! Blaring employee laughter in the common area? [he joins in the laughter with Squidward and Mr. Krabs] Hey Patrick, what's with the fancy duds?
- Patrick-Man: Must I explain everything? I found what I want to do with my life! I... am Patrick-Man!
- SpongeBob: (gasps in amazement) That is so exciting! I can't wait to tell Gary, my parents, grandpar– [Before he can finish, Patrick quickly covers his mouth]
- Patrick-Man: Shush, SpongeBob! My identity must be kept secret! My work here is done. Patrick-Man is off! The city needs my help! [He runs off, but then comes back and holds up a dollar] Oh, I almost forgot, can I get a krabby Patty?
- Mr. Krabs: Please, ma'am, allow me. [Mr. Krabs grabs Mabel's bag that is in-between them]
- Mabel: Huh? [Turns her neck, but uses her hands instead] Why, thank you, young man. [Street sign switches from "don't walk" to "amble"]
- Mr. Krabs: Hehehehe, not a problem ma'am. It's the least I can do-OOOO! [Mr. Krabs spots a dollar on the street. The dollar is carried away by the wind] Sorry, lady, you're on you're own. [Street sign switches from amble to 'scamper']
- Mabel: Oh, dear. [Sign goes from "scamper" back to don't walk. Cars trap her.] Oh, dear! [The dollar that was blown away is placed on the sidewalk. Mr. Krabs skids up to claim it]
- Mr. Krabs: Oh, sweet dollar. Oh, just look at you. So clean. So crisp. Now come to Krabsy. (Mr. Krabs tries to seize the dollar, but is hand chopped by Patrick-Man.)
- Patrick-Man: Halt, Patrick-Man is on to you, thief! Stealing is bad! BAD!
- Mr. Krabs: But I found that dollar!
- Patrick-Man: Nah, enough! This dollar shall stay on the sidewalk, where it belongs. [Places dollar back on the sidewalk] With Neptune's swiftness, AWAY! [attempts to fly, but is pushed down by gravity, then walks with his face on the floor]
- Mabel: [walks up to the sidewalk] Hey, a dollar! [Picks up the dollar and gasps. She proceeds to put the dollar in her shirt] This must be my luck day.
- Patrick-Man: Hey, where'd he come from?
- SpongeBob: [gasps] The Dirty Bubble?!
- Patrick-Man: The Dirty Bubble? I wanted to unmask Man Ray.
- Dirty Bubble: Fools, you blew my cover! Now taste my wrath!
- SpongeBob: What now, Patrick?
- Patrick-Man: SpongeBob, you're looking at a superhero. So, naturally, I will rely on my superpowers. [picks up barrel] And throw some stuff! [throws barrel and hits Squidward]
- Dirty Bubble: [laughs] I wouldn't call that a "total miss". [Patrick-Man has a table in his hand]
- Patrick-Man: Take this, beast! [Throws table, along with another barrel, but both miss. The table hits the cashier boat and the barrel hits the glass wall of the Krusty Krab and shatters it. He grabs SpongeBob]
- SpongeBob: What...? No, Patrick! [Patrick throws him]
- Dirty Bubble: Haha, yummy sponge.
- Mr. Krabs: You've disabled my employees and trashed me restaurant?! Think you might go for the Bubble now?
- Patrick-Man: I've got him right where I want him... for the Pit Punch! [Stench from his armpit forms a pit and flies toward the Dirty Bubble.]
- Dirty Bubble: [swallows it and it hits SpongeBob] Ha! Let's try that again, but this time, I attack! [Dirty Bubble is flying towards Patrick-Man.]
- Patrick-Man: [He gets scared. He looks down, sees and then picks up a Krabby Patty] Lunch! [his ice cream cone point pops the charging Dirty Bubble, defeating him. The fish hiding behind the tables cheer in approval and him eats the Krabby Patty]
- SpongeBob: Way to go, buddy! You're a hero! Uh... may I have your autograph?
- Patrick: Why, of course, young man. That's, uh... "SpongeBob" with 2/7, right?
- SpongeBob: What's your next exciting adventure, Patrick-Man?
- Patrick-Man: Actually... it's Patrick to you. [Eats the cone] I'm retiring, having a job is too much work.
- Mr. Krabs: Not so fast! I think I need you to use your superpowers one last time. [Hands Patrick a broom and a dust pan.]
- Patrick: [Scene zooms out and shows the Krusty Krab with broken furniture everywhere] What's this?
- Note: This is a Patrick themed episode.
Gary's New Toy (2.2)Edit
- SpongeBob: That snail sure is acting weird. It's like he's teething again. [He pours milk, but it leaks through his bowl; sees a hole in it] Hey, hold on a second! GARY, HAVE YOU BEEN CHEWING ON MY BOWL!?!
- Gary: [Spits a piece of bowl out] Noew.
- SpongeBob: Hey, Gary! The Kamen Rider Ghost Mugen Eyecon came in the mail!
It Came from Goo Lagoon (Episode 7)Edit
Safe Deposit Krabs (8.1)Edit
Plankton's Pet (8.2)Edit
- Plankton: SpongeBob, before we're torn to shreds, I'd like to thank you for helping me look for Spot.
- SpongeBob: Aw, it was nothing. Hey, speaking of Spots. Did yo always have a double pupil?
- Plankton: A double what? [pulls Spot off eye] Spot! [dramatic music plays in the background] Thank entropy you're safe! You were hiding on my optical cornea the whole time! You sneaky little amoeba, you.
- [Spot barks and licks Plankton. Plankton laughs]
- SpongeBob: Aw, I'm glad you found Spot. [animals shrieking] Unfortunately, the animals found us too.
- Plankton: Good-bye, Spot. I guess this is the end of the road for us.
- [Spot growls, barks, and jumps out of Plankton's arms]
- Plankton: Spot, no!
- [Spot barks at other animals. the animals laugh. Spot snarls and grows to a much larger size. Spot barks loudly at animals. The animals all run away back into their cages. The cages close. Spot growls and shrinks back to small size. Spot jumps back into Plankton's arms]
- SpongeBob: Wow, Spot! You saved us!
- Plankton: I taught him everything he knows!
- [Spot barks and licks Plankton as the episode ends]
- Noodleman: [after SpongeBob cooks a noodle-patty] You're fired! [throws SpongeBob, then holds up the noodle-patty] And take your noodle-patty with ya! [throws noodle-patty at SpongeBob]
- SpongeBob: [gets hit by the noodle-patty] Fine! I'll get it to go!
- Squidward: SpongeBob?
- SpongeBob: Yes?
- Squidward: You know I hate you, right?
- SpongeBob: Yes, I do.
- Squidward: Well, I hate the smell of burning Krabby Patties more. [He gets down on one pair of knees and takes SpongeBob's hand to propose... that he come back to the Krusty Krab] Please come back and be the fry cook again.
Squid Plus One (13.1)Edit
- Squidward: [screams] GO AWAY!!
- Norton: [starts crying] Okay. [starts walking away]
- Squidward: Wait. I thought you were some other idiot.
- Norton: No. I guess I'm just this idiot. [hands Squidward envelope. Norton excitedly waits for Squidward to open it. He doesn't open it for about 10 seconds at first, but then opens it. A pop-up picture of Bikini Bottom opens out of a card that Squidward opens again] Why, it's beautiful. [Squidward slams card closed and reads the front]
- Squidward: [reading] "You are cordially invited to the fanciest and shmansiest artistic event of the season - the opening of Galleria Diphtheria." Oh, I've heard of that! "Bikini Bottom's most exclusive fine arts showcase. This invitation guarantees the admittance of Squidward Tentacles..." [holds up card; squints eyes] "Squidward Tentacles... Ploos Oh-nay(?)".
- Norton: [suddenly behind Squidward] Ah, it's "a + 1".
- Squidward: [screams, startled] What are you still doing here?
- Norton: It's not "ploos oh-nay", it says "+ 1". [points to words on cards]
- Squidward: Plus one! Oh yeah, of course! Plus 1! [starts laughing a little] Sure! [looks at invitation] What's a plus 1?
- Norton: Well, when you get an invitation to a party, sometimes they put "plus one" on it, to tell you it's okay to bring along a friend.
- Squidward: Do you have to do it?
- Norton: Well, no, you could go alone. It's just that everyone will laugh at you 'cause they think you're a friendless loser.
- Squidward: What, do you want me to call your supervisor and tell him you're just standing around? [Norton sadly walks out of Squidward's house.]
- Squidward: [quickly removes his relaxing stuff and takes out a phone book] Let's see here. Friends. [coughs and then blows away the dust, then sighs] [while looking through the phone book] Friends, friends... [keeps flipping the pages until he spots the number, "555-5717". Squidward gets surprised until it is revealed that the number was formed by little bugs] Hm. Yeah, I wonder if I still have my receipt for this thing. No big deal. Anybody can make a friend by... [reveals more of the card that says...] "TONIGHT!"? [walks around the house] Let's see. There must be someone who's a real part of your life, Squidward. Who do you see every single day? Who do you know like the back of your suction cups? [sees SpongeBob out the window, laughing and playing with his jump rope] But, of course! It's so simple. [runs outside. SpongeBob falls on his jump rope] SpongeBob, I have something to ask you.
- SpongeBob: [happily blinks his eyes to the camera] Of course, I'll go to the opening with you!
- Squidward: That wasn't the question. Which way did the mailman go?
- SpongeBob: Oh, he said he had a package for the Widow Duncan. I think he went– [Squidward quickly runs off. SpongeBob sadly walks away]
- Note: This is a Squidward themed episode.
The Executive Treatment (13.2)Edit
- Patrick: These guys talk funny words.
- Squidward: Oh yeah, they're a riot. What can I get you?
- Patrick: I guess I'll have one of those business sandwiches everyone's talking about.
- Squidward: Ah, the Executive Treatment.
- Patrick: Is that what you call it?
- Squidward: Well, that's what Mr. Krabs makes me call it. [looks around] It's reall just a Krabby Patty that costs more and SpongeBob wears a different tie when he makes them.
- Patrick: Oh wow! I'll take seven!
- Squidward: Oh, I'm sorry, sir. The Executive Treatment is available to executives only. I'm not sorry.
- Patrick: But I never wanted anything so much in my whole life! Since this morning when I wanted a donut and I ate that donut and it was great! That donut... is gone. [Patrick shakes Squidward.] The donut is gone!
- Squidward: [Squidward pushes Patrick's hands away.] First of all, a lot of that donut... is still on your face! [Patrick has half a donut on his face and licks it off.]
- Patrick: Now, where's my executive treatment?
- Squidward: I told you, it's for executives only and you aren't even dressed like an executive! I could of course sell you... [Squidward pulls out a tie] ...An official Krusty Krab business tie for only $10.
- Patrick: Will the tie let me order the executive treatment?
- Squidward: Not on its own, no. But you could Krabby-size the tie with and get a pair of... [Squidward pulls out some glasses] ...Business glasses for additional $10.
- Patrick: [laughs] Well, I'd be stupid not to!
- Squidward: Well, you're half right.
- Patrick: Here's your $20. [Patrick gives Squidward $20]
- Squidward: Here's your glasses. [Patrick puts on the tie and glasses.]
- Patrick: Thanks! I'll take one executive treatment my good man.
- SpongeBob: [pops out of the window with the executive treatment sandwich] Here's your executive treatment!
- Squidward: [takes the sandwich off Spongebob and gives Patrick the sandwich] Here you go.
- Patrick: Oh, man! [whispers] That looks executively delicious!
- Marv: Right here is where all the biggest business decisions in the business are made. Why, if an imposter were to be caught in here, hmm…
- Patrick: He’d be given a sandwich and sent on his way?
- Marv: No, he’d be convicted as a corporate spy and sent to jail forever and ever and ever. Hey, where are you going?
- Patrick: I think I’ve forgot to water my manatee oranges. [Patrick goes to open the doors and leave, but was quickly opened and slammed into by a tall green eel with a business outfit on]
- Stockholder Eel: Gentlemen, please. [The doors close and Patrick slides off the wall]
- Patrick: [dazed] Where am I?
- Stockholder Eel: Exactly. I like you, young man. Everybody scoot down and so he can sit next to me and I won’t intimidate him at all by my terrifyingly long soap opera activity. As this junior executive so eloquently put it, "Where exactly are we?".
- Marv: Ah, sir. If you take a look at this... [Marv shows a line chart on the easel] ...I believe you’ll agree that we’re perfectly positioned for our marketing to be number one across the business sector. [The executives murmur in agreement.]
- Stockholder Eel: I need a straight answer, not a bunch of meaningless charts! What do you give a disappointed stockholder to make him feel better? [The stockholder eel looks at Patrick.]
- Patrick: A sandwich? [The stockholder eel looks at the executives. The executives laugh.]
- Harold: Get a load of this guy! A sandwich!
- Marv: This guy has sandwiches on the brain!
- Patrick: [his head's shaped like a sandwich] No, I don’t! [The executives continue to laugh]
- Note: This a Patrick themed episode.
- SpongeBob: [after seeing a truck, he hides Senor Poopus behind his back, run and trips over a snail, and falls face flat in the sand. He emerges with his face full of sand and disfigured like Quasimodo] Sanctuary! Sanctuary! Everybody in. Everybody in!
What's Eating Patrick? (15.2)Edit
- SpongeBob: [singing] Founders Day is here today. [to Squidward] Squidward, is this even?
- Squidward: [SpongeBob is trying to put up a banner] A little higher. A little to the left. A little more to the left. [SpongeBob falls over] Ha! Perfect. [the barrel rolls against a ladder, which flings a table and lands on top of Squidward]
- Mr. Krabs: [singing] Oh... I wonder, wonder, wonder how many Krabby Patties must we make?
- Squidward: Wonder no longer. You only need 1.
- Mr. Krabs: [gasps] [singing backwards] Ekam ew tsum seittaP ybbaK ynam woh rednow, rednow, rednow I? Ho... (Oh... I wonder, wonder, wonder how many Krabby Patties must we make?) What do you mean "1"?
- Squidward: Didn't you see today's newspaper?
- Mr. Krabs: "No takers for McNulty Challenge". Ha! What's that suppose to mean?
- Squidward: He's the current champion. He only needs to eat 1 patty to win.
- Mr. Krabs: You're going up against the best, so you have to be the best! We're gonna light a fire under you boy-o!
- Patrick: Ah! Oh, no! That's gonna hurt!
- Mr. Krabs: Listen up, mister. No more fooling around, you're here to eat and eat, and then... eat some more.
- Patrick: I like to eat!
- Mr. Krabs: Well, let's see how your tummy handles these patties, Mr. Likes To Eat.
- Patrick: [Patrick starts laughing] Ha-ha-ha, you said "tummy".
- SpongeBob: Tummies! Ha-ha-ha! [Mr. Krabs blows the whistle]
- Patrick: I like whistles!
Patrick! The Game (16.1)Edit
- Patrick: I don't get it. What's an audit?
- SpongeBob: I don't know, let me check the rules. [drops the giant rule book on the ground, opening it] Eh, I guess playing "Certified Public Accountant" isn't as much fun as I thought. [he slides the book away] Maybe it'll be funner if we play louder.
- Patrick: [grabs the dice, shaking it] I am rolling the dice! [he rolls the dice] Now, I am moving! [he picks up a piece and puts it in another spot, picking up a card] "Run... Spreadsheets"!?
- SpongeBob: What does that even mean?! [as he is talking, the screen goes over to Squidward, who is sunbathing, he growls in annoyance and turns up the music on his iPod]
- Patrick: Well, maybe I'm supposed to run around with this sheet spread on the ground!
- SpongeBob: Yeah, that sounds right to me!
- Patrick: It's called... "Patrick! The Game"!
- SpongeBob: Wow.
The Sewers of Bikini Bottom (16.2)Edit
- Mr. Krabs: Listen up, crew, I have an announcement. Bikini Bottom's newest sports stadium will officially be named after this restaurant!
- SpongeBob: "The Krusty Krab Stadium". Wow!
- Mr. Krabs: Paying for the naming rights, will make me millions!
- SpongeBob: Opening day is today! Tailgate party!
SpongeBob LongPants (17.1)Edit
- SpongeBob: Wow! Another Mermaid Man reboot. It's how I always re-imagined the reboot would be remade. [wind blows; shivers] Ooh, cold knees!
- Salesfish: [drives by, then park and jumps out of his boat with a suitcase] Well you see you got cold knees, icy joints like... vivian, patellas? What you need is a pair of longpants.
- SpongeBob: Longpants? [twists around looking at the pants spin around him]
Larry's Gym (17.2)Edit
- Larry: You see before you is a combination of my lifelong dream! A place of my own where I can work out everyday and anytime I want, Larry's Gym! [crowd is cheering again]
- Larry: Looking out at this sea of plastic muscles and sagging flesh, frankly, I'm disgusted.
- Crowd: Awwww!
- Larry: I'm now opening the gym to everyone in Bikini Bottom! [crowd cheers for the third time] ...For the price of a lifetime membership.
- Crowd: Awww! [looks down]
- Larry: But today, everything is free!
- Frankie Billy: [appears with scissors through his head] You're the lobster, Larry! The Alpha Lobster!
- Larry: Well, I don't know if I'll say that! [buffs up]
- Fish #1: Oh, I filled out a membership form! [hands form to Larry]
- Nat Peterson: Me too! [hands form to Larry]
- Larry: What's in that pink box?
- Nat Peterson: Um, do(ugh)nuts sir?
- Larry: [throws away the do(ugh)nut box] "Dough not" brings those in here! In the meantime, enjoy yourself because your first visit is free!
- Mr. Krabs: [magically appears out of nowhere] Is it true that everything is free?
- Larry: That's right, sir! For your first visit, we– [Mr. Krabs runs off and disappears] Hello? In conclusion, I'm at your service to turn anyone, ANYONE, into a ripped heap of muscle glory! [buffs up once more]
- Larry: [laughs] Time to go live the dream... right after I... file this paperwork. [Close-up of the paperwork. While reading some of the paperwork.] I didn't think there'd be so much of it. [drops his head down on the desk in disgust]
- SpongeBob: Excuse me, Larry. I was just working out and I was wondering. Is this normal? [his legs are all cramped up]
- Larry: [freaks out] Even your cramps have cramps! You need to follow my #1 rule - always be hydrating.
- Larry: That's the spirit, and we're going to get you started early. Let me see some crunches! [SpongeBob is seen munching on some kelpo cereal. Larry pulls the cereal box away] The only thing I wanna see in your mouth is that water bottle! [stuffs a water bottle in SpongeBob's mouth] Now, what did I tell you? Always be hydrated! Now, I'll show you some crunches! [does sit-ups] Yeow, yeow, yeow, yeow, yeow!
- SpongeBob: Oh, I can do that. That's what I do when I laugh. [laughs when bending over] Only now, I'll do it on my back. [flips and lands on his back, then he does sit-ups while laughing]
- Larry: Could you do it... without the laugh?
- SpongeBob: I won't lie to you, Larry, probably not. [laughs]
- Larry: Whatever works I guess. Keep up with that and most importantly–
- SpongeBob: ...Always be hydrating. [sticks a jug of water on his head and does sit-ups while laughing]
- Larry: [sighs] Okay, I have a lot of paperwork to catch up on.
- SpongeBob: Oh, he'll be here. Don't worry. Larry made me the man I am today. [The crowd murmurs in amazement.] I taught me just do stuff you'll always do, but do it on your back. Laugh on your back. [does sit-ups as he laughs. The crowd does the same thing. Lays on his back and moves his legs in the air] Walk on your back. [The crowd also does the same thing too] And don't forget, always be hydrated. That means "drink plenty of water". [pours water on his head with a water bottle and the crowd did the same thing; to himself] I hope Larry's okay. [to the crowd] While we're waiting, I guess we could ride bicycles on our backs. [lays on his back and pretends to ride a bicycle. The crowd does the same thing. Through the window of the exercise room, a depressed Larry is watching from the outside. Larry thinks that he is a well better instructor than he is and sadly walks by the steam room]
- Mr. Krabs: [pops out of the steam room] Hey, Larry, thanks for all the free steam. Ha-ha! Sucker. [pops back in the steam room]
- Larry: [sighs in depression and heads back to his desk. He drinks some coffee. He takes a pencil and attempts to break it, but due to is decreased muscle strength, he couldn't break it. He then tries to lift weights with another pencil but with 2 do(ugh)nuts on each end. However, he couldn't do it because of his loss in muscle strength.] Oh, what's the use? [eats a do(ugh)nut and drops his face flat on his desk] Ah! Who am I kidding?
- Squidward: Well, that was the last customer, SpongeBob.
- SpongeBob: [places his two spatulas in his pockets] Oh, what a great day.
- Squidward: And you know why it was a great day? Because Krabs never even showed up.
- [The scene changes to Larry's gym getting ready to close up for the night.]
- Larry: [walking by the steam room until he sees steam coming out] Huh? [sniffs] What is that smell? [jiggles the doorknob] Mr. Krabs, how long have you been in there?! [pulls the door off and sees Mr. Krabs as a cooked up crab on a plate with melted butter and lemons on the side, meaning that he had been in the steam room too long]
- Mr. Krabs: I think I'm done! [to Larry] Would you mind rubbin' a little butter on me?
The Fishbowl (18.1)Edit
- SpongeBob: Patrick, you are making very poor choices!
Married to Money (18.2)Edit
- Plankton: Why couldn't I see it before? [the sea bear roars very loudly, blowing Mr. Krabs' face back; chuckles] The way to get the Krabby Patty formula was so obvious! [throws the chair and whip away offscreen, and hops down onto the sea bear's head] Spend an inordinate amount of time training several dozen sea bears to take over your restaurant and force you to give it up! [about 8 more sea bears surround Mr. Krabs from all sides, all growling] Nothing can turn them from their central purpose!
- SpongeBob: [offscreen] Yoo-hoo! [the sea bears all turn to look at SpongeBob] Who wants their tummies tickled? [has a playful look on his face and is making a tickling motion with his fingers]
- Plankton: No... [the sea bears all smile excitedly and dash away, leaving Plankton floating in mid-air] My weapons! [he succumbs to gravity, and falls to the ground so hard he bounces a little] Ouch!
- SpongeBob: [standing on top of a green sea bear and tickling his tummy] Sea bears aren't weapons, Plankton. [the sea bear is laughing uncontrollably and waving his front fins around wildly] They're furry buckets of love. [the sea bear starts slapping his tail on the ground, making SpongeBob giggle] See? [jumps off the sea bear's stomach to the other side of the dining room, causing his work hat to fall off] And what do sea bears love more than tummy tickles? [pulls a jellyfish hive out from behind his back and holds it above his head] Jellyfish honey!
- Mr. Krabs: [pointing a stern finger at Plankton] Why do you do this, Plankton? When you mess with me business, ya mess with me money! [clenches both claws furiously]
- Plankton: [puts on a smile] Er, money's not everything, you know. [laughs nervously]
- Mr. Krabs: 'Course it is! [$7 bills circle around his eyestalks] Money makes the world go round and makes me heart go pound. [his heart becomes visible from his shirt, pounding in the shape of a dollar sign]
- Plankton: [stands up] Well, if you love money so much, why don't you marry it?
- Mr. Krabs: [his mouth opens like a cash register, then he closes his mouth] If I could, I would.
- Plankton: Would you now? [laughs evilly]
- Mr. Krabs: You still here?
- Plankton: Uh-oh. [Mr. Krabs picks Plankton and kicks him out] That gives me an idea. [lands in the Chum Bucket] Ow.
- Mr. Krabs: You know somethin'? [jumps off the bench and points at Cashina] You look like $1,000,000 when you smile. [Cashina giggles again; Mr. Krabs gets down onto one knee] Cashina, would you make this old crab's day... and allow me to take you to a place where you can buy me dinner? [smiles again]
- Cashina: I'd love to... [her face becomes completely transparent as the rest of her darkens, revealing none other than Plankton inside, sitting on a chair and controlling Cashina by means of a lever, a control panel with buttons, a joystick, and a microphone on it, and a camera]
- Plankton: [puts his hand over the microphone] ...Scam you out of your secret formula, that is. [laughs evilly as Cashina's face reappears; she covers her mouth as Plankton's laugh only comes out as a small giggle]
Mall Girl Pearl (19.1)Edit
- Marina: [cell phone rings] Hi, Pearl.
- Pearl: Hey, girl! Let's hang out!
- Marina: Uh, I can't, I have to work at Hot-Dog on a String today. Brad called in sick, so I'm in charge of stringing the dogs. Totally lame.
- Pearl: I guess I'll see you later then.
- Boy Customer: Uh... Can I get one with extra string?
- Marina: Ugh.
- Nocturna: [phone rings] What?
- Pearl: [calling Nocturna] Hey, girl! Want to come over and make fun of boys or something?
- Nocturna: Uh, sorry, girl, I can't. I'm working at Scorched Coral all day. It's heinous.
- Pearl: [laughs] Oh! So heinous. See ya later.
- Nocturna: See ya later, Pearl.
- Girl Customer: How much is this choker?
- Nocturna: Um, it's a wrist band.
- Girl Customer: [gasping and choking]
- Nocturna: Awesome.
- Beatrice: ...And that's why today, we all wear shoes.
- Marina: Okay, okay, We get it. We will stop being mean, I promise. Just let us go.
- All: Whoa! [groaning]
- Marina: Listen, Pearl. We didn't mean to hurt your feeling or anything. We just, like, think it's weird that you're, like, a grandma now or whatever. We don't really get it.
- Pearl: Well, I don't care what you think anymore anyway. I'm being true to myself, and--and that's all that matters!
- All: Eh.
- Pearl: I'm a grandma now. Right, Beatrice?
- Beatrice: Oh, Pearl, I'm so glad you enjoy being a grandma, but your friends make a good point. You're only young once, you see. You don't want to grow up too fast or you'll miss out on all the fun.
- Pearl: I guess you're right. Being a grandma is nice and all, but I do miss being a super hip young person.
- Beatrice: Go have yourself some fun, my dear. Ah, ah, ah, ah. How about a nice, gentle handshake instead? [groans]
- Pearl: Hey, wait up, guys! I want to be friend while I'm still young!
- Beatrice: I'll see you tomorrow.
- SpongeBob: You dropped this.
Two Thumbs Down (19.2)Edit
- [SpongeBob walks down a road, giving thumbs up to a fish on a skateboard and a fish with a suitcase]
- SpongeBob: [Blows on his thumbs] Woooo! I’m giving away thumbs up today! [He sees a pedestrian waiting to cross the road] Hey, guy! Way to wait!
- [SpongeBob holds out two thumbs up]
- Pedestrian Fish: [looks around] Who, me? [SpongeBob blows on one of his thumbs causing the other thumb to inflate like a balloon, he points to his thumb] Um… [Starts whistling]
- [SpongeBob cranks up one of his thumbs like a jack in the box. The pedestrian fish starts sweating, when the stoplight says to go he starts walking through the street]
- SpongeBob: Hey guy, way to walk!
- [SpongeBob twirls his arms around and holds two thumbs up. The pedestrian fish looking frightened jogs away and is hit by a car off-screen]
- SpongeBob: Oh, this feels great. [He looks at a fish waiting at the bus stop, he flicks an eye booger] Way to flick that [Framerate starts slowing down] eye booger.
- [His thumbs snap, live-action footage of trains crashing shows. His thumbs snap again and live-action footage of a bridge falling apart is presented. SpongeBob has a expression showing his pain. More live-action footage of a tree is show. His thumbs snap more and live-action crow is shown. Once more his thumbs snap and live-action footage of a baby crying plays, both of SpongeBob’s thumbs start talking]
- Thumbhawk 2: Thumbhawk 1, Thumbhawk 1. This is Thumbhawk 2. We got two thumbs down. Repeat. 2 Thumbs down!
- Thumbhawk 1: Thumbhawk one here, copy that. Initiate emergency procedures. Initiating on my count. 3, 2, 1.
- SpongeBob: [his "Thumbhawks" screaming] Oh, my thumbs. My thumbs! MY THUUUUUUMMMBS!!!
- [SpongeBob is taken to a place branched right next to the Bikini Bottom Hospital called “Manfish Center for Thumb Injuries” and SpongeBob is in a hospital bed]
- SpongeBob: How's it looking, Dr. Manfish?
- [Dr. Manfish looks away from the X-Ray of SpongeBob’s broken thumb]
- Dr. Manfish: Well, I'm afraid it doesn't look good, Spongebob. It seems you've severely damaged your ulnar collateral ligament, possible from some kind of repeated action.
- SpongeBob: An action like a thumbs-up?
- Dr. Manfish: Certainly that is one possibility. Hitchhiking could be another.
- SpongeBob: But doctor, I will be able to use my thumbs again, right?
- Dr. Manfish: [as he takes both his eye lenses off] Spongebob, I can't say that for certain. I'm only a board certified thumbologist. I don't know everything. I can only say that we must give it time and see. There are limits to science. But you should prepare yourself for the possibility that you may never regain the use of your thumbs again.
- [Dr. Manfish put his right eye lenses on, SpongeBob looks at one of his thumbs, on a wheel-chair. It coughs]
Sharks vs. Pods (20.1)Edit
CopyBob DittoPants (20.2)Edit
- Plankton: I'm gonna know the formula! I'm gonna know the formula!
- SpongeBob: Plankton, Me Two says you made him in a copy machine, so that you could steal the secret formula.
- Plankton: Uh, well, that's pattonly ridiculous.
- Me Two: Uhh...
- SpongeBob: You got to help him. I think he's sick or something.
- Me Two: I feel funny.
- SpongeBob: Me Two!! Me Two!! Oh, what happened to him?
- Plankton: I was afraid of that. I thought I'd save some money by using cheap toner.
- SpongeBob: What does that mean?
- Plankton: It means my plan is ruined. All the SpongeBob copies will fade away now.
- [Squidward presents himself at SpongeBob's home, dressed up in typical German clothes, in order to convince him that a German family has moved there]
- Squidward: [with a German accent] Ehm... German hello...?
- SpongeBob: ACH! Guten Morgen! Mein Name ist SpongeBob.
- Squidward: [baffled] Say what?
- SpongeBob: Guten Morgen! Mein Name ist SpongeBob. Ich bin gekommen, um meine alte Heimat zu besuchen.
- Squidward: Please, would you speaken Sie English? I need za practice...
Lame and Fortune (21.2)Edit
Plankton: Heres a good one. "You Stink".
Goodbye, Krabby Patty? (Episode 22)Edit
Patrick: Frozen Krabby Patties are... MADE WITH SAND!!
Sandy's Nutmare (23.1)Edit
Bulletin Board (23.2)Edit
- Mr. Krabs: You know, all this note writing must be making you folks hungry. [He gleefully points to the cash register] We have a short line at the register!
- [Squidward is dozing at the cash register]
- Squidward [snoring]: How much for this...?
- SpongeBob [to Mr. Krabs] : Let's see what other nice people are saying. [He walks out of Mr. Krabs office. Moments later, SpongeBob is standing in front of the bulletin board, screaming and clutching his head] AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHH!!!
- Dave: What are you shrieking about? [SpongeBob hurriedly covers a space of the bulletin board]
- SpongeBob [evasively]: Nothing, I just love to shriek! AAAAAAAAAAAAHHHH!!!
- SpongeBob:[through walkie-talkie] Pineapple One to Delicate Flower. Come in, Delicate Flower.
- Squidward: I AM NOT ANSWERING TO DELICATE FOWER!
- [He quickly rolls down his sleeve, hiding the rose tattoo on his left arm]