Cartoon All-Stars to the Rescue

1990 animated television special

Cartoon All-Stars to the Rescue is a 1990 American animated drug-abuse prevention television special starring many of the popular cartoon characters from American weekday, Sunday morning, and Saturday morning television at the time of the film's release.

Directed by Milton Gray, Marsh Lamore, Bob Shellhorn, Mike Svayko, and Karen Peterson.
Drugs don't stand a chance against these guys! (taglines)

Dialogue edit

[Michael sees himself on his deathbed]
Michael: It's- it's me. This is my future?
Daffy Duck: It is if you don't get off those drugs!
[Some cartoon characters visit and help Michael]
Gordon 'ALF' Shumway: You use, you lose!
Baby Piggy: Listen to us! We care about you, Mikey!
Bugs Bunny: What's up, doc, is your life, if you don't cut it out.
Kermit: There's nothing cool about a fool on drugs!
Huey, Dewey, Louie: [altogether] Just believe in yourself!
Michaelangelo: Yeah! You're excellent just the way you are! Without drugs!
Michael: [scared] HOW DO I GET OUT OF HERE?
[A door back to Michael's room appears in front of him and the characters]

Gordon 'ALF' Shumway: [after emerging from a picture frame on Corey's dresser after her piggy bank is stolen] You wanna help track down the thief, Garfield?
Garfield: [is a lamp] Hey, going through life with a blue lampshade is work enough. Wake me when the lasagna comes.
Gordon 'ALF' Shumway: [yanks the lamp attachment off Garfield] Let me rephrase that: do you wanna help, or do you wanna be lunch?
Garfield: [salutes and climbs off the dresser] My luck to be stuck on a dresser with a pushy alien.

Theodore: What's all this for?
Alvin: Either someone's conducting a major chemistry experiment, or this is a serious no-no.
Gordon 'ALF' Shumway: Toto, something tells me we're not in cartoon territory anymore.

Michael: [Alf shows Michael what he will look like in the future, via a mirror] Who is that?
Gordon 'ALF' Shumway: Well, it's not Freddy Krueger. This is you. Pretty pitiful, huh?

[Bugs takes out a blue block with a red button on it. He presses it and drops it on the ground. It turns into a time machine]
Michael: A time machine?
Bugs Bunny: I borrowed it from some coyote.

Gordon 'ALF' Shumway: That kid's got a one-way ticket to Nowheresville.
Theodore: Simon suspects drugs.
Pooh: Oh, my!
Slimer: Ooh! That's bad news!
Alvin: Michael needs our help!
Slimer: Then let's help him!

[Michael and Smoke have fallen through an open manhole into a sewer. They see Michaelangelo of the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles]
Michaelangelo: Cowabunga, dude! How did you ever get so totally cool?
Michael: What are we doing down here?
Michaelangelo: Like, you fell through a radical hole, dude! You could've avoided it, but you weren't thinking. Come to think of it, that's a lot of your problem.
Michael: What problem?
Michaelangelo: Drugs, bud. Your brain must be, like, really messed up.

Michael: [throwing the drugs away] Corey! Don't you ever, EVER, ever do this stuff!
Corey: But you did it!
Michael: I was a dope. I was wrong.
Corey: Then stop! Please, Michael.
Michael: I don't know if I can.
Smoke: Face it, kid. We're buddies for life, whether you like it or not.
Corey: You don't have to quit on your own. Talk to Mom and Dad! They'll help! I'll help!
Smoke: Listen to me, Mikey.
Michael: I think I've listened to you long enough.
[He throws Smoke out a window, sending him into a garbage truck]
Smoke: [last words before his defeat] You can't get rid of me this easy! I'll be back, and you can bet on it!
Michael: He's right, you know. He will try to come back.
Corey: And when he gets here, we'll be ready for him. Right, guys?
All Cartoons: [on a poster] Right!
Pooh: [Michael frees Pooh from the cabinet] Oh! Oh thank goodness! I thought I was going to miss something important.
[He jumps his way to the poster and magically joins the other cartoons]
Michael: C'mon, sis. Let's go talk to Mom and Dad.

Taglines edit

  • Drugs don't stand a chance against these guys!
  • Smoke: Well, you look like three fine lads. You know, I might have something here you'd like to try. Something to make you feel real good.
  • Huey: (singing) There's a million wild and wonderful ways to say no.
  • Dewey: No thanks!
  • Huey: No way!
  • Baby Kermit: Better learn a few and take 'em wherever you go.
  • Dewey: No dice!
  • Louie: No sir!
  • Kermit: If your pal says, "Let's get high".
  • Garfield: Here's a practical reply.
  • Tigger: Go ahead, let it fly, spit right in his eye and say.
  • Pooh, Tigger, Huey and Dewey: No!
  • Chipmunks: There's a million international ways to say nope.
  • Hefty Smurf: Those drugs are so boring.
  • Chipmunks: All around the world the smart guys are giving up dope.
  • Kermit: I've been training for football.
  • Baby Gonzo: In Berlin, they just say "nein".
  • ALF: And they tell me that works fine.
  • ALF, Tigger, Huey, Dewey and Louie: Cause the bottom line's to show your spine and say no.
  • Garfield: Now you could say beat it, get lost, get out of my face with that stuff.
  • ALF: But that could be tactless. You may prefer cool, like this:
  • Kermit: I'll catch you guys later, okay?
  • Michelangelo: I've got too much homework. It's rough.
  • Gonzo: I'm late for my baseball game and I'll miss my ride.
  • Tigger: My kid sister needs me.
  • ALF: Her hamster died.
  • Piggy: Gotta hurry home.
  • Winnie The Pooh: There's no time to kill.
  • Tigger: So I'll catch you later.
  • Michelangelo and Piggy: Like heck I will!
  • Chipmunks: There's a million wild and wonderful ways to say no.
  • Pooh: Ah-choo! Guess I'm allergic.
  • Garfield: And a good excuse is something you never outgrow.
  • Piggy: It's bad for my complexion.
  • Kermit: When your pals say, "Let's get wrecked!"
  • Dewey: Muster up your self-respect.
  • Michelangelo: Go on, push eject, protect yourself.
  • Michelangelo, Huey, Dewey and Louie: Get up and go!
  • Tigger: Be the first one on your block to say.
  • ALF: "Eh, forget it, doc".
  • Chipmunks: Try a couple of those wonderful ways to say no.
  • Piggy: But you forgot one! Wait!
  • Hewey, Dewey and Louie (Michelangelo just lip-syncs): There's a million zillion wonderful ways to say no.
  • Piggy: Stand back, and I'll demonstrate!
  • All: There's a million jillion wonderful ways to say... (Piggy: HI-YAH!) no!

Voice cast edit

External links edit