Spoon

Spoon, a term for an eating utensil that is considered an inherently funny word, has been featured in many quotations.

SPOON!!! ~ The Tick

Quotes

Alphabetized by author or specified source

The little dog laugh'd to see such Craft,
And the Dish ran away with the Spoon.

if it weren't for my spoons, I'd probably go insane. ~ Adam Clayton

They dined on mince, and slices of quince, Which they ate with a runcible spoon

There is no spoon.

The spoon came alive with spoon-ness and the ball with ball-ness and the block with block-ness, and the girl laughed. ~ Roger Zelazny in Lord of Light

• Ugh, he spooned me
  • Random guard, after being hit in the stomach with a ladle in Aladdin

• High diddle diddle,
  The Cat and the Fiddle,
  The Cow jump'd over the Moon,
  The little dog laugh'd to see such Craft,
  And the Dish ran away with the Spoon.
  • Anonymous nursery rhyme, "Hi Diddle Diddle" in Mother Goose's Melody (c. 1765)
  • Variant: Hey diddle diddle,
    The cat and the fiddle,
    The cow jumped over the moon,
    The little dog laughed to see such sport,
    And the fork ran away with the Spoon
    • The Oxford Dictionary of Nursery Rhymes (1951) edited by Opie and P. Opie

• Better take her to the White Queen, she'll be safe there. Spoon.
  • The March Hare, in Alice in Wonderland

• She came in through the bathroom window, protected by a silver spoon.
  • The Beatles
• What did the fork say to the spoon? Who was that ladle I saw you with last night? That was no ladle that was my knife!
  • The Joker
• Do you know that's the third spoon I've heard drop this month?
  • Algy Longworth, in Bulldog Drummond

• And the cat's in the cradle with the silver spoon,
  Little Boy Blue, and the Man in the Moon
  When you coming home Dad?
  I don't know when — we'll get together then, Son,
  You know we'll have a good time then.
  • Harry Chapin, in "Cats in the Cradle"

• Check it out, Guys. I got a Springfield spoon for my spoon collection... if it weren't for my spoons, I'd probably go insane.
  • Adam Clayton of U2 in an episode of The Simpsons

• You there! What the hell is this?
  • Father Jack, in Father Ted

• You spoony bard!
  • Tellah, in Final Fantasy IV

• A man that's fond precociously of stirring,
     Must be a spoon.
  • Thomas Hood, Morning Meditations (1839), St. 10

• Bless me, Father, for I have sinned. I did an original sin. I poked a badger with a spoon.
  • Eddie Izzard

• They dined on mince, and slices of quince, Which they ate with a runcible spoon; And hand in hand, on the edge of the sand, They danced by the light of the moon.
  • Edward Lear, in The Owl and the Pussycat (1871)

• The Dolomphious Duck,
  who caught Spotted Frogs for her dinner
  with a Runcible Spoon
  • Edward Lear, in Twenty-Six Nonsense Rhymes and Pictures

• We found this spoon sir.
  • Sergeant, in Life of Brian

• Mike Wazowski: I think I have a plan here: using mainly spoons, we dig a tunnel under the city and release it into the wild.
  James P. Sullivan: … Spoons.
  • Dialogue from Monsters Inc.

• A sweet lounge lizard, with a silver spoon,
  • Motorhead, in Stone Dead Forever

• Sheriff of Nottingham: Locksley! I'm gonna cut your heart out with a spoon.
  Guy of Gisbourne: Why a spoon cousin? Why not an axe?
  Sheriff of Nottingham: Because it's dull, you twit! It'll hurt more.
  • Dialogue in Robin Hood: Prince of Thieves

• Just when I thought things couldn't get any better... he spooned me.
  • Carrie, Sex and the City

• Marry, he must have a long spoon that must eat with the devil.
  • William Shakespeare in The Comedy of Errors; original orthography: Marrie he must haue a long spoone that must eate with the diuell

• That tall drink of water with the silver spoon up his ass.
  • Red, in The Shawshank Redemption

• Australian: "You call that a knife? This is a knife!"
  Bart Simpson: "That's not a knife; that's a spoon."
  Australian: Alright, alright, you win. I see you've played knifey-spoony before.
  • The Simpsons This should have an episode citation added.

• Spoon!!!
  • Battle cry of The Tick

• I was born with a plastic spoon in my mouth
  • Substitute, The Who

• There is no spoon.
  • "Spoon Boy" in, The Matrix by the Wachowski brothers, indicating that all perceptions of external objects as entirely separate entities are constructs of the mind; this was also quoted in response to the rather grisly death of Private Witherspoon in the horror film Dog Soldiers (2002).

• They'll eat their words with a fork and spoon, and watch 'em!
  They'll hit the road and all be surfin' soon.
  • Brian Wilson and Mike Love, in "Catch a Wave" for The Beach Boys

• The spoon came alive with spoon-ness and the ball with ball-ness and the block with block-ness, and the girl laughed.
  • Roger Zelazny in Lord of Light