Full House/Season 3
season of television series
Tanner's Island [3.1]Edit
- [while Danny runs after the runaway boat, Jesse follows him]
- Rebecca: Jesse, you'll never catch that boat!
- Jesse: I don't wanna catch the boat. I wanna catch Danny!
Back To School Blues [3.2]Edit
- Joey: [upon seeing Jesse move like Elvis Presley] Jesse, Elvis never made one golf movie.
Breaking Up Is Hard To Do [3.3]Edit
Nerd For A Day [3.4]Edit
- Danny: Joey, let's go! We're gonna be late!
- Joey: Danny, what is the big rush?
- Danny: Joey, you know I always leave the house at exactly 7:48. Now, thanks to you, I'm already two minutes late.
- Joey: What are you talking about? We are right on time.
- Danny: Joey. That's a barometer.
- Joey: Well, in that case, we'd better get moving. There's a hurricane brewing.
Granny Tanny [3.5]Edit
- Jesse: Who let you outta your crib?
- Michelle: I let me out.
- Jesse: You mean you climbed over the bars and jumped down all by yourself?
- Michelle: You got it, dude.
- Jesse: Jail break!
Star Search [3.6]Edit
- Jesse: Joseph, you've been in toon-town for 2 days. Now, start acting like a human being.
And They Call It Puppy Love [3.7]Edit
- [Joey reads from the tabloids]
- Joey: Listen to this, Michelle. "Psychic struck by lightning". If he was any good, he'd have seen that coming.
Divorce Court [3.8]Edit
- Rebecca: [whilst Jesse, Danny and Joey race] For those of you at home who think you're watching a slow-motion replay, do not be fooled. They are actually moving at this speed.
Dr. Dare Rides Again [3.9]Edit
- Pete: (in an old video from '83, when Jesse does the dare of his life) The doctor is about to operate!
- Jesse: Aren't you a little overdramatic there?
- Pete: Not if you die.
- Jesse: Hey, look, I was dared, so I'm gonna do it.
- Girl next to him: Not without a kiss for luck first.
- Jesse: Have mercy.
- Pete: [so annoyed by their good-luck kiss, covers the camera lens with his right hand] Aw, don't waste tape on this. This is disgusting!
The Greatest Birthday on Earth [3.10]Edit
- Danny: Joey, what is an elephant doing in my living room?
- JoJo: Surprise, Cleano!
- [the elephant catches JoJo's briefs with his trunk]
- JoJo: The surprise is on JoJo. She got my underwear!
- Danny: I got a great cake.
- Joey: Did ya get the triple chocolate with pink frosting in the shape of a clown's face with a big cherry-red nose? Did ya, did ya, DID YA?
- Danny: Yes, Joey. Look at this. [shows Joey the cake]
- Joey: Yes!
Joey & Stacy and... Oh, Yeah, Jesse [3.12]Edit
- Joey: [Right after kissing Stacy] Ay chihuahua!
- Jesse: Ay chihuahua?
- Joey: I could've said, "Have mercy!" but it felt more like an, "Ay chihuahua!"
No More Mr. Dumb Guy [3.13]Edit
Misadventures in Baby-Sitting [3.14]Edit
- Brian: Oh no! Not Kimmy Gobbler!
- Danny: [to Steve, who is smoking heavily] You, sir, are a chimney!
Lust in the Dust [3.15]Edit
Bye Bye, Birdie [3.16]Edit
- Michelle: Hi, Dave, you're a pretty bird!
- Miss Petrie: Ready for a story boys and girls?
- Michelle: Come on, it's story time!
- Aaron: Miss Petrie, Dave flew out the window, Michelle did it.
- Miss Petrie: Well, it was just an accident, I'm sure Michelle didn't mean to do it.
- Michelle: I'm sorry, I'm a bad girl!
- Aaron: A very bad girl!
13 Candles [3.17]Edit
- Stephanie: [alarm clock goes off] What time is it?
- D.J.: It's 3:47. I was born on this day at exactly 3:48.
- Stephanie: You have an excellent memory.
- D.J.: (gets out of bed and looks at watch) 3, 2, 1, yes. (looks in mirror) I am now officially a teenager.
- Stephanie: Well, pin a rose on your nose!
- D.J.: I gotta rest up for my party tonight. Oh, and don't forget, you're not invited.
- Stephanie: I liked you better when you were a kid.
- D.J.: Well, those days are over. You are now sharing a room with a sophisticated, mature young woman. (gets into bed) I'M 13! (bounces in bed)
- Kimmy: D.J., what are you doing dancing with Elliott? You should be dancing with Kevin Guin.
- D.J.: I would, but Kevin didn't ask me.
- Kimmy: Then ask him. It's very simple, watch. (Turns to Bitterman) Hey, Bitterman, you wanna dance?
- Bitterman: Sure, why not?
- Kimmy: Maybe later. I'm busy.
- Jake & Kimmy (after they kiss): Whoa, baby!
Mr. Egghead [3.18]Edit
- Michelle: Joey broke Stephanie's nose.
- Danny: [to Joey] You broke Stephanie's nose?!
Those Better Not Be Those Days [3.19]Edit
- (Danny, Jesse and Joey look into the future and see that Stephanie, DJ and Michelle are adults and still living at home)
- Adult Kimmy: (Walks in) Hola, Tanneritos!
- Jesse: Kimmy Gibbler! Oh, my God!
- Adult Kimmy: Eat your hearts out, boys. (Smirks) Too bad you weren't nicer to me when I was a kid.
- Jesse: That was so depressing.
- Joey: Yeah. Can you imagine the girls still living here?
- Jesse: No, not that - my hair.
Honey, I Broke The House [3.20]Edit
- (when there was a car in the kitchen)
- Michelle: There's a car in the kitchen!
- DJ & Kimmy: WHOA BABY!!
- DJ: There's a car in the kitchen!
- Michelle: I told you so.
- DJ: Michelle, do you know how Joey's car got in here?
- Michelle: Yes, I do!
- DJ: How?
- Michelle: Through the window!
- Danny: Joey, are you all right? You had us worried sick!
- Joey: Danny, I'm fine.
- Danny: In that case, you're in big trouble, mister!
- Stephanie: I dru--- I dru--- I dru---
- Rebecca: You dropped something? Did something break?
- (Joey leans on car, sobbing.)
- Michelle: Don't cry. Be a big boy.
- Michelle: There's a car in the kitchen!
Just Say No Way [3.21]Edit
Three Men and Another Baby [3.22]Edit
- Jesse: (about the baby they're watching) You see cute, I see smelly diapers.
Fraternity Reunion [3.23]Edit
- (after the TV fell off the banister)
- Danny: What? Why? How? Who?!
- Michelle: Daddy's a girl.
- Stephanie: No, he's a woman.
- Kimmy: An ugly woman.
Our Very First Telethon [3.24]Edit
- Danny: I close my eyes for two seconds and it's a Kimmy Gibbler telethon.
- Joey: Danny, you've been out for four hours.
- Danny: (checks his watch) Four hours. Why didn't anyone wake me? Oh no, I'm ruined, I ruined the telethon, my career is over...
- Rebecca: Danny, we're still on the air.
- Danny: (to camera) That concludes the dramatic portion of our show.