Full House/Season 3

season of television series

Seasons: 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 | Main

Full House was a television sitcom that ran on the American ABC network from 1987 until 1995.

Tanner's Island [3.1]Edit

[while Danny runs after the runaway boat, Jesse follows him]
Rebecca: Jesse, you'll never catch that boat!
Jesse: I don't wanna catch the boat. I wanna catch Danny!

Back To School Blues [3.2]Edit

Joey: [upon seeing Jesse move like Elvis Presley] Jesse, Elvis never made one golf movie.

Breaking Up Is Hard To Do [3.3]Edit

Nerd For A Day [3.4]Edit

Danny: Joey, let's go! We're gonna be late!
Joey: Danny, what is the big rush?
Danny: Joey, you know I always leave the house at exactly 7:48. Now, thanks to you, I'm already two minutes late.
Joey: What are you talking about? We are right on time.
Danny: Joey. That's a barometer.
Joey: Well, in that case, we'd better get moving. There's a hurricane brewing.

Granny Tanny [3.5]Edit

Jesse: Who let you outta your crib?
Michelle: I let me out.
Jesse: You mean you climbed over the bars and jumped down all by yourself?
Michelle: You got it, dude.
Jesse: Jail break!

Star Search [3.6]Edit

Jesse: Joseph, you've been in toon-town for 2 days. Now, start acting like a human being.

And They Call It Puppy Love [3.7]Edit

[Joey reads from the tabloids]
Joey: Listen to this, Michelle. "Psychic struck by lightning". If he was any good, he'd have seen that coming.

Divorce Court [3.8]Edit

Rebecca: [whilst Jesse, Danny and Joey race] For those of you at home who think you're watching a slow-motion replay, do not be fooled. They are actually moving at this speed.

Dr. Dare Rides Again [3.9]Edit

Pete: (in an old video from '83, when Jesse does the dare of his life) The doctor is about to operate!
Jesse: Aren't you a little overdramatic there?
Pete: Not if you die.
Jesse: Hey, look, I was dared, so I'm gonna do it.
Girl next to him: Not without a kiss for luck first.
Jesse: Have mercy.
Pete: [so annoyed by their good-luck kiss, covers the camera lens with his right hand] Aw, don't waste tape on this. This is disgusting!

The Greatest Birthday on Earth [3.10]Edit

Danny: Joey, what is an elephant doing in my living room?
JoJo: Surprise, Cleano!
[the elephant catches JoJo's briefs with his trunk]
JoJo: The surprise is on JoJo. She got my underwear!

Danny: I got a great cake.
Joey: Did ya get the triple chocolate with pink frosting in the shape of a clown's face with a big cherry-red nose? Did ya, did ya, DID YA?
Danny: Yes, Joey. Look at this. [shows Joey the cake]
Joey: Yes!

Aftershocks [3.11]Edit

Joey & Stacy and... Oh, Yeah, Jesse [3.12]Edit

Joey: [Right after kissing Stacy] Ay chihuahua!
Jesse: Ay chihuahua?
Joey: I could've said, "Have mercy!" but it felt more like an, "Ay chihuahua!"

No More Mr. Dumb Guy [3.13]Edit

Misadventures in Baby-Sitting [3.14]Edit

Brian: Oh no! Not Kimmy Gobbler!

Danny: [to Steve, who is smoking heavily] You, sir, are a chimney!

Lust in the Dust [3.15]Edit

Bye Bye, Birdie [3.16]Edit

Michelle: Hi, Dave, you're a pretty bird!
Miss Petrie: Ready for a story boys and girls?
Michelle: Come on, it's story time!
Aaron: Miss Petrie, Dave flew out the window, Michelle did it.
Miss Petrie: Well, it was just an accident, I'm sure Michelle didn't mean to do it.
Michelle: I'm sorry, I'm a bad girl!
Aaron: A very bad girl!

13 Candles [3.17]Edit

Stephanie: [alarm clock goes off] What time is it?
D.J.: It's 3:47. I was born on this day at exactly 3:48.
Stephanie: You have an excellent memory.
D.J.: (gets out of bed and looks at watch) 3, 2, 1, yes. (looks in mirror) I am now officially a teenager.
Stephanie: Well, pin a rose on your nose!
D.J.: I gotta rest up for my party tonight. Oh, and don't forget, you're not invited.
Stephanie: I liked you better when you were a kid.
D.J.: Well, those days are over. You are now sharing a room with a sophisticated, mature young woman. (gets into bed) I'M 13! (bounces in bed)

Kimmy: D.J., what are you doing dancing with Elliott? You should be dancing with Kevin Guin.
D.J.: I would, but Kevin didn't ask me.
Kimmy: Then ask him. It's very simple, watch. (Turns to Bitterman) Hey, Bitterman, you wanna dance?
Bitterman: Sure, why not?
Kimmy: Maybe later. I'm busy.

  • Jake & Kimmy (after they kiss): Whoa, baby!

Mr. Egghead [3.18]Edit

Michelle: Joey broke Stephanie's nose.
Danny: [to Joey] You broke Stephanie's nose?!

Those Better Not Be Those Days [3.19]Edit

(Danny, Jesse and Joey look into the future and see that Stephanie, DJ and Michelle are adults and still living at home)
Adult Kimmy: (Walks in) Hola, Tanneritos!
Jesse: Kimmy Gibbler! Oh, my God!
Adult Kimmy: Eat your hearts out, boys. (Smirks) Too bad you weren't nicer to me when I was a kid.
Jesse: That was so depressing.
Joey: Yeah. Can you imagine the girls still living here?
Jesse: No, not that - my hair.

Honey, I Broke The House [3.20]Edit

(when there was a car in the kitchen)
Michelle: There's a car in the kitchen!
DJ & Kimmy: WHOA BABY!!
DJ: There's a car in the kitchen!
Michelle: I told you so.
DJ: Michelle, do you know how Joey's car got in here?
Michelle: Yes, I do!
DJ: How?
Michelle: Through the window!

Danny: Joey, are you all right? You had us worried sick!
Joey: Danny, I'm fine.
Danny: In that case, you're in big trouble, mister!

Stephanie: I dru--- I dru--- I dru---
Rebecca: You dropped something? Did something break?

(Joey leans on car, sobbing.)

Michelle: Don't cry. Be a big boy.

Michelle: There's a car in the kitchen!

Just Say No Way [3.21]Edit

Three Men and Another Baby [3.22]Edit

Jesse: (about the baby they're watching) You see cute, I see smelly diapers.

Fraternity Reunion [3.23]Edit

(after the TV fell off the banister)
Danny: What? Why? How? Who?!

Michelle: Daddy's a girl.
Stephanie: No, he's a woman.
Kimmy: An ugly woman.

Our Very First Telethon [3.24]Edit

Danny: I close my eyes for two seconds and it's a Kimmy Gibbler telethon.
Joey: Danny, you've been out for four hours.
Danny: (checks his watch) Four hours. Why didn't anyone wake me? Oh no, I'm ruined, I ruined the telethon, my career is over...
Rebecca: Danny, we're still on the air.
Danny: (to camera) That concludes the dramatic portion of our show.

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