Teen Wolf (Season 1)

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Teen Wolf (2011–2017) was an American television series which aired on MTV. It is a supernatural drama series about a teenager named Scott McCall, who is bitten by a werewolf and must cope with how it affects his life and the lives of those closest to him.

Season 1

Wolf Moon [1.1]

Scott: STILES, WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING!

Stiles: YOU WEREN'T ANSWERING YOUR PHONE! WHY DO YOU HAVE A BAT?!

Scott: I thought you were a predator!

Stiles:a pre- Look, I know it's late but you gotta hear this. I saw my dad leave 20 minutes Dispatch called. They're bringing every officer from the Beacon Department, and even state police

Scott: For What?

Stiles: two joggers found a body in the woods

Scott: A dead body?

Stiles:No,a body of water. Yes, Dumb-ass a dead body.

Scott: You mean like murdered?

Stiles: No body knows yet.Just that was a girl, probably in her 20s.

Scott: Hold on,If they found the body,then what are they looking for?

Stiles: That's the best part. They only found half... We are going.

Scott: We're actually doing this?

Stiles: You're the one always bitching that nothing happens in this town!

Scott: I was trying to get a good night's sleep before practice tomorrow!

Stiles: Right, 'cause sitting on the bench is such a grueling effort.

Scott: No, because I'm playing this year. In fact, I'm making first line.

Stiles: Hey, that's the spirit. Everyone should have a dream, even a pathetically unrealistic one.

Scott: Just out of curiosity, which half of the body are we looking for?

Stiles: Huh! I didn't even think about that.

Scott: And, uh, what if whoever killed the body is still out here?

Stiles: Also something I didn't think about.

Scott: It's good to know you've planned this out with your usual attention to detail.

Stiles: I know!

Scott: Maybe the severe asthmatic should be the one holding the flashlight huh?

Stiles: Hey come on!

Scott: Stiles! Wait up! Stiles!Stiles!

a police man:hold it right there!

Sheriff: Hang on,hang on.This little delinquent belongs to me.

Stiles:Dad,how are you doing?

Sheriff: So you uh,listen in to all my phone calls?

Stiles:No. Not the boring ones.

Sheriff:Now, where's your usual partner in crime?

Stiles:Who, Scott? Scott's home.He said he wanted to get a good nigh's sleep for the first day back at school tomorrow. It's just me. In the woods. Alone.

Sheriff:Scott,you out there?Scott? Well,young man,I'm gonna walk you back to your car.And you and I,are gonna have a conversation about something called invasion of privacy.

Scott: Damn.

Stiles: Okay, let's see this thing.

Scott: It was too dark to see much, but I'm pretty sure it was a wolf.

Stiles: A wolf bit you?

Scott: Uh-huh

Stiles: No, not a chance.

Scott: I heard a wolf howling.

Stiles: No, you didn't.

Scott: What do you mean "No, I didn't?" How do you know what I heard?

Stiles: Because California doesn't have wolves, okay? Not in like 60 years.

Scott: Really?

Stiles: Yes, really! They're are no wolves in California.

Stiles: Oh, god. That is freaking awesome. I mean, this is seriously gonna be the best thing that's happened to this town since– Since the birth of Lydia Martin. Hey, Lydia, you look… like you're gonna ignore me. You're the cause of this you know.

Scott: Uh-huh.

Stiles: Dragging me down to your nerd depths. I'm a nerd by association. I've been Scarlet-Nerded by you.

Scott: I don't know what it was. It was like I had all the time in the world to catch the ball. And that's not the only weird thing. I can hear stuff I shouldn't be able to hear. Smell things.

Stiles: Smell things? Like what?

Scott: Like the Mint Mojito gum in your pocket.

Stiles: I don't even have Mint Mojito... [Stiles looks in his pocket and finds a single piece of the aforementioned gum, frowning in confusion at the sight of it] So, all this started with the bite?

Scott: What if it's like, an infection? Like my body flooding with adrenaline before I go into shock or something?

Stiles: [jokingly] You know what? I actually think I've heard of this. It's a specific kind of infection.

Scott: Are you serious?

Stiles: Yeah. I think it's called lycanthropy.

Scott: What's that? Is it bad?

Stiles: Oh, yeah, it's the worst. But only once a month.

Scott: Once a month?

Stiles: Mmm-hmm. On the night of the full moon. Aroooo!

Scott: [annoyed] Hey, man.

Stiles: Hey, you're the one who heard a wolf howling.

Scott: Hey, there could be something seriously wrong with me!

Stiles: I know! You're a werewolf! Okay, obviously I was kidding, but if you see me in the shop class trying to melt all the silver I can find, it's because Friday's a full moon.

Derek: You've been given something that most people would kill for. The bite is a gift!

Jackson: Where are you getting your juice?

Scott: [confuzzled] My mom does all the grocery shopping.

Second Chance at First Line [1.2]

Math Teacher: Mr. McCall, you're not even close to solving your problem.

Scott: Tell me about it...

Coach: My grandmother can move faster than that, and she’s dead. Do you think you can move faster than the lifeless corpse of my dead grandmother?

Sheriff Stilinski: So, you lied to me?

Stiles: ...That depends on how you define lying.

Sheriff Stilinski: Well, I define it as not telling the truth. How do you define it?

Stiles: Pfft... reclining your body in a horizontal position.

Pack Mentality [1.3]

Allison: Think about something else.

Scott: Like what?

Allison: Like me... Naked

Stiles: So, you killed her?

Scott: I don't know. I just woke up. I was sweating like crazy, and I couldn't breathe. I've never had a dream where I woke up like that before.

Stiles: Really? I have. It usually ends a little differently.

Scott: Maybe it was my blood on the door?

Stiles: Could have been animal blood. You know, maybe you caught a rabbit or something.

Scott: And did what?

Stiles: Ate it.

Scott: Raw?

Stiles: [snarkily] No, you stopped to bake it in a little werewolf oven.

Stiles: I don't think Danny likes me very much.

Scott: I ask Allison on a date and now we're hanging out?

Stiles: Am I not attractive to gay guys?

Scott: I made first line and the team captain wants to destroy me. And now, now I'm gonna be late for work.

Stiles: Wait, Scott! You didn't- Am I attractive to gay guys? You didn't answer my question.

Allison: Maybe you should stop pretending to suck just for his benefit.

Lydia: Trust me, I do plenty of sucking just for his benefit.

Lydia: Someone's daddy's little girl.

Allison: Sometimes. But not tonight.

Stiles: It's gotta be a pack thing. Like an initiation-- you do the kill together.

Scott: Because ripping someone's throat out is such a bonding experience?

Scott: Can you at least tell me the truth? Am I gonna hurt someone?

Derek: Yes.

Scott: Could I kill someone?

Derek: Yes.

Scott: Am I gonna kill someone?

Derek: Probably.

Scott: Do you wanna hang out, like us and them?

Allison: Yeah, I guess. Sounds fun.

Jackson: You know what else sounds fun? Stabbing myself in the face with this fork.

Stiles: (to Scott) Why's it starting to feel like you're Batman and I'm Robin? I don't wanna be Robin all the time!

Scott: Nobody's Batman or Robin any of the time!

Stiles: Not even some of the time?

Scott: Just stay here.

Stiles: Oh my GOD! Fine.

Scott: You're okay?

Allison: Once my heart starts beating again, yeah.

Magic Bullet [1.4]

Chris: Hockey on grass is called field hockey.

Scott: Why should I help you?

Derek: Because you need me.

Stiles: [Done with Derek being a total Sourwolf] In fact, if I wanted to, I could probably drag your little Werewolf ass out into the middle of the road and leave you for dead!

Derek: [Very much Annoyed] Start the car. Or I'm gonna rip your throat out. With my teeth.

Derek: It was a different kind of bullet.

Stiles: A silver bullet?

Derek: No, you idiot!

Stiles: If you go to her house today and squander that colossal opportunity, I swear to God I'll have your dick's ballsack de-balled.

Stiles: What am I supposed to do with him?

Scott: Take him somewhere. Anywhere.

Stiles: And, by the way, he's starting to smell!

Scott: Like... like what?

Stiles: Like death!

Derek: You faint at the sight of blood?

Stiles: No, but I might at the sight of a CHOPPED-OFF ARM!

Scott: This house is like the friggin' Wal-Mart of guns!

The Tell [1.5]

Lydia: What the hell is a Stiles?

Kate: I don't know whether to kill it or lick it.

Mr. Harrison: Try putting the highlighter down between paragraphs. It's chemistry, not a coloring book.

Derek: You wanna do homework? Or you wanna not die?

ЬцВт

Scott: We don't go out in the middle of the night murdering people, do we?

Stiles: If you think getting rid of contractions in all of your sentences makes your arguement any more legitimate, then you are wrong.

Mr. Stilinski: [to Stiles, who's about to go off on a tirade about healthy eating] I'm carrying a lethal weapon. If I want the curly fries, I will have the curly fries!

Heart Monitor [1.6]

Stiles: Be a werewolf, not a teen wolf. Be a werewolf.

Scott: Hit him again, and then you'll see me get angry.

Scott: I love her.

Stiles: And that's great. Moving on -

Coach Finstock: The reading of the Gettysburg Address.

Scott: What?

Coach Finstock: That's sarcasm. Are you familiar with the term sarcasm, McCall?

Scott:(Looking at Stiles) Very. (Stiles smirks proudly)

Allison: Haven't you ever learned there's no "I" in "team"?

Jackson: Yeah, but there is a "me."

Scott: It smells terrible in here anyway.

Stiles: Really? In a boys' locker room. That doesn't make any sense at all.

Scott: You buried your sister under a spiral. What does it mean?

Derek: You don't wanna know.

Derek: You want me to teach you, get rid of her.

Night School [1.7]

Stiles: Alright, first off - throwing Derek under the bus...nicely done.

Lydia: Is that him with the best explanation ever for why he's half a frickin' hour late?

Scott: What do we do?

Stiles: We get to my Jeep. We get out of here. You seriously think about quitting your job.

[Scott, Stiles, Allison, Lydia, and Jackson have run into an abandoned classroom to escape the alpha. Scott, Allison, Lydia, and Jackson are frantically barring the door.]

Stiles: Guys could we just--wait a second. Guys listen to me. Can we wait a second? Guys? Stiles talking? Can we hang on one second please? Gu-hello! Okay, nice work. Really beautiful job everyone. Now, what should we do about the twenty foot wall of windows?

Scott: It wants me in its pack. I think first, I have to get rid of my old pack.

Stiles: What do you mean? What old pack?

Scott: Allison, Jackson, Lydia...you.

Stiles: The Alpha doesn't want to kill us...

Scott: It wants me to do it. And thats not even the worst part

Stiles: How in holy hell is that not the worst part Scott?!

Scott: Because when it made me shift. I wanted to do it. I wanted to kill you... All of you

Lunatic [1.8]

Allison: I don't think it was Derek in the school.

Scott: Why don't you ask her?

Stiles: Well, to save myself utterly crushing humiliation. Thank you, Scott.

Stiles: Call me Biles or I'll kill you.

Scott: If I get out, I think I might kill someone.

Stiles: Yeah, it's called heartbreak. About two billion songs written about it.

Allison: Lydia, do you think I made the wrong decision?

Lydia: About that jacket with that dress? Absolutely.

Scott: I don't care about your breakups, Mom. I'm gonna get her back.

Scott: Give me the bottle of Jack.

Wolf's Bane [1.9]

Peter: I was gonna wait for dramatic flare, but when you look this good, why wait?

Jackson: Do you know what Argent means in French? It means silver!

Sheriff Stilinski: I'm very happy for you. And I'm really proud of you.

Stiles: Thanks. Me too, I'm happy and proud of myself.

Danny: [talking about Derek] Who is he again?

Stiles: Ahm... My cousin, … Miguel.

Derek: [holds up shirt] This no fit.

Stiles: You swing for a different team but you still play ball, don't ya Danny boy.

Danny: You're a horrible person.

Stiles: I know. It keeps me awake at night.

Lydia: Are you breaking up with me?

Jackson: Dumping, actually. I'm dumping you.

Jackson: In preparation of some big changes, I've decided to drop some of the dead weight in my life, and you're just about the deadest.

Allison: You beat me again.

Jackson: I have an unfair advantage. You see these cheekbones? Aerodynamically suited for speed in water.

Jackson: How you gonna feel Scott, when she's screaming my name?

Scott: Your mind's blank? You can't think of anything to say?

Stiles: Not under this kind of pressure.

Jackson: However it is you came to be what you are, you're gonna get it for me, too. You're gonna get it for me or, she's gonna find out about it, too.

Derek: By the way one more thing...

Stiles: Yeah.

[Derek slams Stiles head against the steering wheel]

Stiles: Oh, God. What the hell was...

Derek: You know what that was for. Go. Go!

Derek: [about Peter] Stiles, get out of there, right now! It's him. He's the alpha. Get out!

Co-Captain [1.10]

Peter: When I was in high school, we played basketball. Now, there's a real sport.

Formality [1.11]

Melissa McCall: Have you told her how you feel?

Scott: She knows.

Melissa: Listen, dumbass, I'm gonna let you in on a secret that most guys don't even have a clue about, all right? You ready?...Women love words.

Scott: Hmm?

Melissa: You need to tell her how you feel. Just say it. Say it again. Say it differently. Learn how to say it better. Learn how to sing it. You know, just write it in a poem and a letter attached to flowers. Carve it in a tree, in a sidewalk in wet cement, tattoo on your arm.

Allison: Why did you do that?

Scott: Because I love you.

Code Breaker [1.12]

Scott: She's not a werewolf.

Stiles: Then what the hell is she?

Derek: You want me to risk my life for your girlfriend? For your stupid little teenage crush that means nothing?

Kate: It's what they do, and they can't help it.

Allison: All of them?

Peter: His username is Allison? His password is also Allison?

Stiles: Still want him in your pack?

Peter: Do you know why wolves hunt in packs? It's because their favorite prey are too large to be brought down by one wolf alone.

Stiles: And you're a Mac guy. Does that go for all werewolves or is that just a personal preference?

Allison: I just saw my boyfriend turn into a werewolf.

Peter: Don't feel bad, if she lives she'll become a werewolf. She'll be incredibly powerful.

Stiles: Yeah, and once a month she'll go out of her freakin' mind and try to tear me apart.

Peter: Well, actually, considering she's a woman...twice a month.

Derek: I'm the alpha now