My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic (season 6)

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The following is a list of quotes from the sixth season which ran from March 26 to October 22, 2016. My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic.

The Crystalling — Part 1

Twilight: I didn't know you were meeting us!

Shining Armor: [tired] Of course I am! It's me, right here. Here I am. Why wouldn't I come meet my sister? Though we have met before, heh-heh...

Twilight: Are you all right?

Shining Armor: [tired] Never better! Being a father is amazing! And wonderful, and amazing, and confusing, and amazing, but surprising too, you know? I mean, not that you'd know. You wouldn't know, I know... you know?

Baby Alicorn: [burbling]

Twilight: The baby is an Alicorn?!

Cadance: [tired] It looks that way.

Rarity: But... but... but I thought Alicorn wings had to be earned by accomplishing some great, princess-worthy deed!

Applejack: Yeah. How can you just be born with them?

Celestia: The birth of an Alicorn is something Equestria has never seen!

Luna: It is beyond even our understanding.

Fluttershy: [hushed] That's not very reassuring.

Pinkie: Wow! A unicorn, and a Pegasus! So she could be a super-strong flyer and have crazy baby magic.

The Crystalling — Part 2

Baby Alicorn: [giggling]

Sunburst: Citizens! May I present the newest member of the Crystal Empire!

Baby Alicorn: [laughs]

[crowd cheers]

Mustafa Combe: She's beautiful!

Scouts Honor: Oh! It's just so moving!

Baby Alicorn: [giggles]

Tough Nut: Best Crystalling ever!

Shining Armor: We have Sunburst to thank for that.

Cadance: I hope he takes his role as crystaller seriously. Something tells me the baby will need a pony like him to look to for magical advice.

Twilight Velvet (Mrs. Sparkle): Cadance, darling, aren't we goin to name the poor little dear, or are we going to spend our entire visit just calling her "the baby"?

Cadance: We were thinking... "Flurry Heart".

Shining Armor: You know, to remember the occasion.

Rarity: Oh, goodness, how could anypony forget?

Twilight: I think it's lovely. [kisses]

Flurry Heart: [giggles]

The Gift of the Maud Pie

Pinkie Pie: [gasps] Look at that hand-stitched ten-thousand-thread-count velvet-lined rock pouch! Maud will love it! I need it! Ungh! Huh, must be stuck! [reading] "Took a sudden vacation to Canterlot with my grandniece. Back in a few moons." Oh, no. Oh, no-no-no-no-no-no-no! Well, maybe, just maybe, he's already back from vacation and just forgot to take the sign down! [shouting and pounding on door] Hello, Mr. Pouch Store Owner! I'd like to hear all about your sudden vacation in Canterlot with your grandniece while buying a pouch for my sister please!

Copper Top: Miss, the store's clearly closed.

Pinkie Pie: But it can't be. It just can't be! If I can't get that pouch... then not only am I not getting my sister the greatest present in the history of PSSSD, but now I have no PSSSD present for my sister at all!

Pinkie: Excuse me, sir! I couldn't help but notice your nifty rock pouch! Is there any chance you'd be willing to part with it? I really need it. Like, really really really!

Street Rat: So let me get this straight: You, uh, really really need this pouch, huh?

Pinkie: I believe I said really really really.

Street Rat: Well, you know, pouches like this are really hard to come by these days. But I might be able to part with it for the right price.

Pinkie: So you'll sell it to me? And I'll finally be able to give my sister the perfect Pie Sisters' Surprise Swap Day present? Oh, thank you, thank you, thank you! [party cannon fires]

Street Rat: Hmmm. That's one sweet party cannon you got there. Tell you what. I'd be more than happy to give you the pouch for the low, low price of... that cannon.

Pinkie: [gasps] M-My... party cannon...?

Street Rat: Well, if you really want to give that sister of yours the perfect present, then you'll have to give up your party cannon. So, what do you say? The pouch for the cannon

Maud: [deadpan] There.

Pinkie: Yep! That sure is the pony I got the pouch from!

Rarity: That's amazing! How did you know where he'd be?

Maud: [deadpan] Maud Sense.

Pinkie: Runs in the family!

On Your Marks

Apple Bloom: Hear ye, hear ye! The first post-cutie mark meetin' of the Cutie Mark Crusaders is now in session!

Apple Bloom: [clears throat]

Sweetie Belle: Oh! I'm sorry, Apple Bloom. I was distracted by the radiance of my cutie mark... did you say something?

Scootaloo: I mean... it's pretty amazing how the colors just pop off your flank. It's kinda hard to look aw—

Apple Bloom: Wow... did we really only ever do things just to get our cutie marks?

Sweetie Belle: I don't know. Maybe?

Scootaloo: Aw, come on! We did lots of stuff that didn't have anything to do with getting a cutie mark.

Sweetie Belle: Of course we did!

Apple Bloom: Absolutely! [montage music]

Sweetie Belle: Huh. So now that we don't have to do stuff to get our cutie marks, what is it that the Cutie Mark Crusaders actually do?

Apple Bloom: We do exactly what we got our cutie marks in!

Cutie Mark Crusaders: Helping other ponies!

Scootaloo: Ponies without cutie marks!

Sweetie Belle: Or ponies who've forgotten their special purpose!

Apple Bloom: Exactly! We just have to find ponies who need our help! Come on!

Sweetie Belle: So... what's your cutie mark problem?

Bulk Biceps: Oh, right. Uh, well, my cutie mark is a dumbbell, but I've lifted every dumbbell in Ponyville!

Scootaloo: [nervously] Have you tried lifting other things?

Bulk Biceps: You mean, not dumbbells?

Sweetie Belle: Yeah!

Apple Bloom: Yeah!

Bulk Biceps: Yeah!

Bulk Biceps: Oof! I mean... no. I hadn't thought of that. You guys are awesome! [crunch]

Bulk Biceps: But... what happens when I run out of other stuff?

Sweetie Belle: ...I guess you could teach other ponies to lift things?

Apple Bloom: Yeah!

Scootaloo: Yeah!

Bulk Biceps: Yeah! Wow, you three really have a knack for this!

Tender Taps: I can't believe it! It's just what I always imagined it would be! And if it weren't for all of you, I wouldn't even have it.

Scootaloo: No problem!

Sweetie Belle: It's what we do.

Apple Bloom: I only wish I'd realized what you needed right away instead of mopping around for no reason...

Tender Taps: Well, either way, I hope you keep dancing. [short tap-dancing burst]

Apple Bloom: [taps] You know, I just might! It sure is a lot of fun, and I'm pretty confident I can only get better. [to the Crusaders] I'm sorry I was so silly about us all doing our own things. If we hadn't, I might never even have tried dancing!

Tender Taps: Or find out I needed help!

Sweetie Belle: With each of us going out and trying things on our own, we'll be three times as likely to find ponies to help!

Scootaloo: And trying new stuff might even make us better at helping them, like how I used my bungee jumping to change the sets!

Sweetie Belle: Or my crochet to make the costumes!

Apple Bloom: Well, one thing is for sure. The Cutie Mark Crusaders will never be the same. We'll be better!

Cutie Mark Crusaders: Yeah!

Gauntlet of Fire

Spike: [to Twilight and Rarity (in their rock disguise)] I don't want to be Dragon Lord or dragon toast, and I stopped glowing, so let's sneak out of here!

Dragon Lord Torch: Where do you think you're going, little dragon?!

Spike: [nervously] Oh, uh, hi, Your Lordship. Uh, I was just going home!

Dragon Lord Torch: You don't get to leave unless I say you can!

Princess Ember: Dad, look at him. He's just a runt. Besides, he doesn't even wanna compete. Let him go.

Dragon Lord Torch: [chuckling] He is rather tiny, heh-heh. I could squish him with my pinky claw.

Spike: [chuckles nervously]

Dragon Lord Torch: That wasn't a joke, it was a fact. When I want you to laugh, I will say "Be amused!"

Ember: Hey, you, little fella! I've thought about it, and your plan makes sense. Let's do it.

Spike: Really? Great! It's a deal!

Ember: Just so you know, this doesn't mean we're gonna pick flowers or exchange necklaces or whatever pony friends do.

Garble: I'm sick and tired of you two helping each other! Dragons don't do helping!

Ember: These dragons do!

No Second Prances

[Starlight has cast a spell onto Big Mac]

Big Mac: Ee-yup-yup-yup-yup-y-y-y-you did something! Woah! What's happening? I feel really weird! I'm talking so much! And I'm so articulate, enunciating with such precise pronunciation! [Covers his mouth with his hoof] Annie Apple awoke and accidentally ate an Auburn Azalea! [Screams and runs off in fright] Make it stop!

[Applejack glares angrily at Starlight]

Starlight: I can't be friends with somepony who doesn't talk.

[Applejack glares more]

Starlight: And I guess my first instinct shouldn't be to magically command ponies to act the way I want them to?

[Applejack gets up closer to her]

Starlight: Alright, I'll change him back!

Starlight: You know each other?

Twilight: You could say that.

Trixie: We've had our differences. What matters is Twilight gave me a second chance, and I appreciate it. [pause]

Twilight: So, um, what brings you to Ponyville?

Trixie: The Grrrreat and Powerful Trrrrixie has come to perform a new stage show of grand illusion! I am calling it "The Humble and Penitent Trixie's Equestrian Apology Tour"!

Starlight: That's kind of a mouthful.

Trixie: It's a working title.

[After Trixie deceived Starlight]

Twilight: Well, you won. I hope you're happy!

Trixie: [sighs] Looks like the Great and Powerful Trixie is back to a solo show.

Twilight: Trixie?

Trixie: Which is exactly the way she likes it! Thank you, Princess Twilight, for getting rid of that annoying pony who wanted to be my first friend! I am not sad at all! I definitely don't feel as if my heart is breaking into a million pieces! [closes the curtain]

[Twilight feels ashamed]

Newbie Dash

Spitfire: Rainbow Dash, glad we found you. We need you in the show when we get to Ponyville. Flying.

Scootaloo: But she's only in the Reserves!

Spitfire: Not anymore, kid.

Rainbow Dash: [slow gasp] You mean...

Scootaloo: [gasps] Rainbow Dash, you're finally a full-fledged Wonderbolt! Woo-hoo! [laughs] Yeah, Rainbow Dash! Whoo!

Spitfire: Heh. What she said.

A Hearth's Warming Tail

Twilight: Hey, Starlight! Ready to celebrate your first Hearth's Warming Eve here in Ponyville?

Starlight: I was thinking I might just skip it.

Twilight and Spike: [gasp]

Spike: Skip Hearth's Warming Eve?!

Starlight: I just find it all a little silly. It's mostly a day dedicated to presents and candy, isn't it?

Spike: And why would you deny yourself presents and candy? That's crazy talk!

Twilight: I think what Spike means to say is Hearth's Warming is about more than presents and candy. It's a time to spend with friends and family when we celebrate a very important day in Equestria's history.

Starlight: I think to most ponies, it's just an excuse for silly songs and fun, not a day to remember some old story.

Twilight: Maybe you just haven't heard the right Hearth's Warming Eve story yet!

Starlight: Earth ponies, Pegasi, and unicorns sing songs around a hearth to fight back an eternal winter caused by the mythical windigos? Ha! Every foal and filly knows that story.

Twilight: Not that one. My favorite holiday story, "A Hearth's Warming Tale"!

Twilight: Snowfall was all set to cast her spell that would erase Hearth's Warming Eve for all time... [narrating] ...when a voice from the hearth caught her attention.

Applejack (As the Spirit Of Hearth's Warming Past): You sure you wanna go through with this?

Starlight (As Snowfall Frost): Huh?! Who's there?!

Applejack (As the Spirit Of Hearth's Warming Past): The Spirit of Hearth's Warming Past, that's who. And you and me have got to have us a little chat.

Starlight (As Snowfall Frost): A spirit?! [suspiciously] I didn't cast any spirit summoning spell. What are you doing here?

Applejack (As the Spirit Of Hearth's Warming Past): You don't think a spell like that would get by without some powerful forces noticing? You've got our attention, Snowfall Frost, and we've got some pretty strong opinions on this spell of yours.

Starlight (As Snowfall Frost): "We"?

Applejack (As the Spirit Of Hearth's Warming Past): They'll be along in a bit. For now, it's just you and me. Let's get a move on. We got a ton to see and barely any time to see it.

Starlight (As Snowfall Frost): I'm not going anywhere. I've got a spell to cast, and I don't need a history lesson about Hearth's Warming Eve.

Applejack (As the Spirit Of Hearth's Warming Past): We aren't going to the past to learn about the holiday. We're going to learn about you.

Starlight (As Snowfall Frost): [gasps] Spirit? What am I supposed to—

Pinkie (As the Spirit Of Hearth's Warming Presents): [reverberating] Snowfall Frost! It is I, the Spirit of Hearth's Warming Presents!

Starlight (As Snowfall Frost): Um, don't you mean "Present", like the time?

Pinkie (As the Spirit Of Hearth's Warming Presents): No! Toys, Hearth's Warming doll... here, want a cupcake?

Starlight (As Snowfall Frost): Fine, "Presents". All of the pointless things ponies waste their time on.

Pinkie (As the Spirit Of Hearth's Warming Presents): Oh, Snowfall, it's not what the gift is that matters, it's what the gift means!

Starlight (As Snowfall Frost): It doesn't mean anything. It's just stuff!

Pinkie (As the Spirit Of Hearth's Warming Presents): Exactly! Sometimes a cupcake means "I love you!" Or a toy means "Hi, how're you doing?" Sometimes a book means "Your mane looks amazing!" And sometimes a scarf means... well, a scarf usually means you look cold. That one's easy.

Starlight (As Snowfall Frost): I don't understand anything you're saying.

Pinkie (As the Spirit Of Hearth's Warming Presents): Whoa! Whoa! [trembles]

Starlight (As Snowfall Frost): What's happening to you?!

Pinkie (As the Spirit Of Hearth's Warming Presents): My Spirit of Hearth's Warming Presents Sense is going off! That means a song is coming on!

Twilight: [singsong, imitating Pinkie Pie (As the Spirit Of Hearth's Warming Presents)] And the reason is to be with your friends! [normal] What?

Starlight: You know you're doing your Pinkie voice, right?

Twilight: I was not!

Spike: [laughing]

Starlight: So, what happens next?

Twilight: Well, the party was—

Spike: Wait! Can we take a quick break? I need to refill my cocoa.

Twilight: [groans] Fine. But hurry up! We're almost to the best part!

Rarity (As Merry): Snowdash!

Rainbow Dash (As Snowdash): Hey, Merry.

Rarity (As Merry): Why, whatever is the matter, darling?

Fluttershy (As Flutterholly): Was it the eggnog? Oh, I knew I put in too much cinnamon!

Rainbow Dash (As Snowdash): Oh, no, the eggnog was awesome, Flutterholly, I'm just mad at somepony who was complaining about how awful Hearth's Warming Eve is.

Rarity (As Merry): I don't suppose that pony's name starts with "Snow"?

Fluttershy (As Flutterholly): And ends with "Frost"?

Rainbow Dash (As Snowdash): She said Hearth's Warming Eve is just an excuse to party, and we would all be better off spending time working to make Equestria a better place.

Crowd: [booing]

Rarity (As Merry): What does Snowfall think a better Equestria looks like?

Rainbow Dash (As Snowdash): Ponies working hard, learning, and using their abilities for the benefit of Equestria.

Rarity (As Merry): Oh, my.

Fluttershy (As Flutterholly): Snowfall Frost?

Starlight (As Snowfall Frost): I was hoping I wasn't too late for the party? I brought gifts. [record needle scratch]

Rainbow Dash (As Snowdash): [spit-take] Boss?!

Starlight (As Snowfall Frost): I was wrong earlier, about Hearth's Warming Eve. It's not all about singing and presents. The singing and presents are all about celebrating the ponies in our lives. The ponies we should listen to more often: our friends.

Rainbow Dash (As Snowdash): Wow. [rip] Dragon toenail? Uh... thanks?

Starlight (As Snowfall Frost): I was in a hurry. I'll do better next time.

Rainbow Dash (As Snowdash): Ha. You kidding? No one's ever given me dragon toenail before! It's awesome! Now come get some eggnog!

Twilight Sparkle: [narrating] And from then on, it was always said of all the Hearth's Warming Eve celebrations, Snowfall's was the Hearth's Warmingest.

The Saddle Row Review

Rainbow Dash: Um, I have an idea. How 'bout we don't read it.

Twilight: What she means is, before you read it, we should probably tell you about—

Rarity: No, no, darling. Please, no spoilers.

Fluttershy: But—

Rarity: No spoilers!

Twilight: [to the beat] Sweep, sweep, sweep, sweep...

All: [to the beat] Sweep, sweep, sweep, sweep, sweep, sweep, sweep, sweep, sweep, sweep, sweep...

Pinkie Pie: Yeah. Making copies of yourself always sounds like a great idea, but before you know it, you're locked in a room with fifty Pinkie Pies watching paint dry.

Rainbow Dash: What would she do without us? Huh. Let me think. [imitating Rarity] "Darlings, I'm absolutely doomed, doomed, doomed!" [laughs, normal voice] I sound just like her! Hey, you're not writing this down, are you?

Pinkie: Oh, I can't really stop a super fun party in the middle of mega-happy fun times, can I?! Oh, what would Rarity want?!

Rarity Devil: Keep that party going till the break of dawn!

Pinkie: Really?

Rarity Angel: Indubitably! And as for the roof, get jiggy! Raise it, Pinkie! Raise it like you've never raised it before!

Pinkie: Oh! If you say so!

Rarity Devil: Oh, please, Pinkie Pie. Never in a million years would I say such balderdash!

Twilight: How did this happen?

Pinkie: I shut down the party.

Applejack: I told Plaid Stripes no.

Fluttershy: I asked the raccoons to leave.

Rainbow Dash: I asked a lot of fabric questions.

Pinkie, Applejack, Fluttershy and Rainbow Dash: Just like I thought Rarity would want!

Applejack's Day Off

Rarity: Honestly, how in Equestria did it never occur to you to check for leaks?

Aloe: There's just so many other things to worry about! I suppose ve get used to the vay things are, and we don't realize there vas problem.

Rarity: You obviously need an outside eye to evaluate the situation. It's lucky for you Applejack is too stubborn to relax!

Flutter Brutter

Fluttershy: You can stay here—

Zephyr Breeze: You're the best! We're gonna have so much fun.

Fluttershy: On one condition.

Zephyr Breeze: Totally. Anything.

Fluttershy: You have to get a job.

Zephyr Breeze: Cracking the whip, huh? You always were kind of bossy.

Rainbow Dash: I am going to give you a job so simple and straightforward, not even you can weasel your way out of it! [quickly] And the second you try, I'm gonna zap you with a storm cloud! Got it?!

Zephyr Breeze: Oh, I got it. I can already feel the electricity between us.

Fluttershy: Zephyr, you're smart and talented. You could do anything if you just tried!

Zephyr Breeze: And what if I give everything I have and still fail? Honestly, I think it's better not to try at all.

Rainbow Dash: But then you won't ever do anything.

Zephyr Breeze: I don't expect you two to understand. I mean, when have you ever failed? You've literally helped save Equestria, like, a dozen times.

Fluttershy: And I was worried that I'd fail every time! Sometimes you have to do things, even though you might fail

Spice Up Your Life

Twilight: As you've all probably noticed, it's been quite some time since the map has sent us on a mission of friendship.

Spike: Yeah! Ever since Starlight messed with it to go back in time and try to change history!

Twilight: Yes. Since then.

Pinkie: Fluttershy and Twilight in Appleloosa! No, me and Rainbow Dash in Las Pegasus! No, Rainbow Dash and Twilight in Yakyakistan! No, Twilight and Twilight in Twilight's castle!

Stranger Than Fan Fiction

Quibble Pants: Right. We're actually being held captive by Caballeron. Please! This guy's accent is all over the place! No offense.

Dr. Caballeron: I...

Quibble Pants: If this were really a real Daring Do adventure, I'm sure I'd step on the wrong plank at exactly the wrong— Whoa!

Rainbow Dash: [straining]

Quibble Pants: [sighs] Good thing this is all just a pretend adventure. Least we know all of this struggling won't make the bridge fall apart.

Quibble Pants: You need to get your money back.

Quibble Pants: Uh, do you think A. K. Yearling would consider letting me write the next book? I... I think I can make things way clearer. I mean, for instance, in the second adventure, there's a side character. I don't want to kind of name it right now, because it's sort of this thing that I've already written a lot of fan fiction on. I don't want you to... Not that I'm saying that you would steal it! But I am saying this would totally go along my whole thing about puzzle-solving, except what if each puzzle that was solved unlocked a new karate move? Think of it that way, right? And I mean I'm kind of a "Yearlite" myself, so I'm sure she'd be open to—

Rainbow Dash: Uh... Quibble?

Quibble Pants: Sorry!

The Cart Before the Ponies

Applejack: I got the passenger seat all warmed up for you, Apple Bloom!

Apple Bloom: Passenger seat?!

Cheerilee: Um, aren't you all missing some pony?

Applejack: They'll be along.

Cheerilee: And, uh, [hushed] usually the younger ponies drive the carts.

Rarity: [chuckles] Darling, do these look like usual carts to you?

Rarity: Oh! My beautiful swan cart is an ugly duckling!

Applejack: And my old-time cart is a rootin' tootin' wreck!

Rainbow Dash: [straining] It still counts as a win if I push my cart across, right?

28 Pranks Later

Rainbow Dash: [repeating lines as she does pranks on everypony] Gotcha!

Rainbow Dash: So I may have switched all the Filly Guide cookies for joke cookies that were supposed to make ponies' mouths rainbow but somehow turned everypony into mindless cookie-eating zombies instead! I figure we just hide out here until the effects wear off, and as long as nopony else eats the cookies, we'll be fine.

Rarity: That's lovely, darling, except for one thing... [droning] We've already eaten theeeeeeeeeemmmmm...

Applejack: [droning] Looks like your prank up and backfiiiirrrrreeeeed...

Rainbow Dash: Please! Stop! I never meant for this to happen! It was just a harmless prank! It was supposed to be funny! But this isn't funny at all!

Pinkie: Exactly!

Rainbow Dash: You can't just go around—

Twilight: —pranking whoever you feel like?

Fluttershy: Without thinking about how it might make them feel?

Rarity: Or if they'd even enjoy it?

Applejack: Or think it's funny?

Rainbow Dash: Yeah! [beat] Ohhh. I see what you did there.

The Times They Are a Changeling

Spike: [deep voice] "Spike?" Who's "Spike"?

Starlight: Pfft. Uh, you're Spike, Spike. And why are you dressed like that?

Spike: [groans, normal voice] Guys, you're blowing my cover!

Spike: You... saved me?

Thorax: It's okay. I know you don't wanna be friends.

Spike: Wait! I don't understand. Changelings are supposed to be evil... right?

Thorax: Evil? Oh, not me. All I've ever wanted is a friend.

Shining Armor: Spike! What are you doing?! Get away from that thing!

Spike: No! He's not a "thing"! His name is Thorax, and he's my friend!

Twilight: As the Princess of Friendship, I should set an example for all of Equestria. But today, it was Spike who taught me that a new friend can come from anywhere. I guess everypony still has things to learn about friendship. Even me! And if Spike says Thorax is his friend, then he's my friend too.

Thorax: Thank you.

Dungeons & Discords

Discord: Fun? With sidekicks? Oh, you must think that we're in a dimension where everything is opposite. [snap] "Da-dee-la! I'm Opposite Discord, and I want to hang out with Spike and Big Mac! I'm sure I'd have fun!"

Opposite Fluttershy: Well, guess what, Sassafras?! I'm Opposite Fluttershy, and I'm sick of being nice and quiet all the time!

Twilight: We should just close the door and let them finish... whatever this... is.

Rainbow Dash: No way! Did you see Big Mac's sword? I totally want in!

Pinkie: Yeah! I don't know what it is, but it looks like super duper fun!

Pinkie and Rainbow Dash: Guys' night!

Buckball Season

Rainbow Dash: Between Applejack and me, we've got two-thirds of a team. All we need is a unicorn. That's where you two come in.

Pinkie: [whispering loudly to Fluttershy] Uh... they know we're not unicorns, right?

Rainbow Dash: Uh, obviously. You're going to be on my team, and Fluttershy is going to be on Applejack's team.

Applejack: We'll play against each other along with whatever unicorns want to try out until we find the best one.

Pinkie: Ohhhh! Phew! That's a relief because I left my unicorn costume at home! That's "uncredible"! Unbelievable and incredible? [scoffs] Come on!

The Fault In Our Cutie Marks

Gabby: The Cutie Mark Crusaders! I can't believe it's really, really you!

Sweetie Belle: Say, is there some kind of spell you can whip up to make her mark appear?

Twilight: Um, I don't know if any of you remember, but using magic to get a cutie mark never really works out all that well.

Scootaloo: Gabby, we can't help you.

Gabby: But, but... you're the world-famous Cutie Mark Crusaders! I can't believe it! I... I... I won't believe it!

Twilight: You actually got a griffon a cutie mark for the first time in recorded history?! You know what this calls for? A full-scale research project!

Viva Las Pegasus

Applejack: The map is sending us where?!

Fluttershy: Las Pegasus?!

Applejack: But Las Pegasus is a wild vacation spot! It's just one big party!

Fluttershy: All those lights and sounds, not to mention the crowds... Oh, just the thought of it is overwhelming!

Twilight: I know Las Pegasus doesn't seem like either of your cups of tea, but I have total faith you wouldn't have been called unless you were the perfect ponies for the job.

Applejack: [over loudspeaker] Flim and Flam told us you'd see right through the fake rich pony bit, and that once you did, you wouldn't be able to resist gloatin' about it! This was all part of the plan!

Gladmane: Oh, now, now, friends! Listen, I-I can explain everything!

Director: I think you've done enough of that! Darling?

Trapeze Star: Hmph!

Trainer 1: Oh, I cannot believe we let him almost ruin our friendship!

Trainer 2: And our act. Good luck finding another one!

Gladmane: Wait! No! Y'all come back! Come on, I-I'm gonna be ruined! This is Gladmane's, y'all! Come on, you can't do this to...

Applejack: Gladmane has left the building!

Flam: In fact, we might think of it as a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity.

Flim: Emphasis on "once".

Fluttershy: [suspiciously] What do you mean?

Flam: [over loudspeaker] While this establishment undergoes a slight change in management, my brother and I want to assure you that it remains the pinnacle of Las Pegasus entertainment! Which is why we invite each and every one of you to experience the wonder of the Ponet Fantastique Theater – at half the normal cost of admission!

Flim: [over loudspeaker] And while you're appreciating this historic venue totally devoid of any performers of any kind, we invite you to use the wonder of your own imaginations to fill the space at no additional charge!

Applejack: Flim and Flam!

Every Little Thing She Does

Starlight: Cogeria... persuadere... fiducia... hmm. Ah! Of course! Fiducia Compelus needs a trigger. [amplified] Ponies! Hear my voice and listen! Pinkie, kitchen. Rarity, Applejack, library. Fluttershy, stay here. Rainbow Dash, find somewhere inside the castle and set up a place where we can chillax.

Rainbow Dash, Applejack, Rarity, and Pinkie: [overlapped agreement]

Applejack: [mechanically, muffled] It was the best of apples, it was the worst of apples...

Starlight Glimmer: [exhales] I can handle this. It's just magic, and I know magic. What's that?!

Pinkie: [muffled noises]

Starlight: What did you say?

Pinkie: [mechanically] The cakes are burning. You left the ovens on.

Starlight: We need water!

Rainbow Dash: [mechanically] Yes, Starlight.

Starlight: Storm clouds?!

Starlight: Sun – check. Chairs – check. And thanks to a simple Catadupa Levitata spell, we've got water. Is that everything we need to chillax?

Rainbow Dash: Nope.

Starlight: No? What did I miss?

Rainbow Dash: Quiet.

Starlight: Ah! Right.

Twilight: Great job, Starlight. Looks like you've completed another friendship lesson. [sighs]

Rainbow Dash: Hey! She completes the lesson when I say she completes it. So less learning and more chillaxing!

Starlight: So... how long do we sit quietly?

Main cast: [laughing]

P.P.O.V. (Pony Point Of View)

Twilight: Come on in, everypony! Gummy, Opalescence, and Winona? This is a surprise!

Spike: Aren't Pinkie, Rarity and Applejack with you?

Opalescence: [purring]

Twilight: [reading] "Sorry, darling, but I must decline the invitation to your soiree. While I'm sure it will be positively resplendent, there are certain ponies I'd rather not associate with at the moment. Rarity."

Spike: Rarity's not coming? Awww. So I polished my scales for nothing.

Twilight: [reading] "Sorry I can't make it, but I'm still a mite upset about everything that happened on the boat. Applejack." "Sorry I can't make the tea party today, but there's a small problem with the guest list. Plus, I'm right in the middle of a very important cupcake. Pinkie." Come on, Spike! Since our friends won't come here and tell us what happened, we'll just have to go to them!

Where the Apple Lies

Applejack: Uh, Apple Bloom, did you pack up the cider into the same crates as the zap apple jam?

Apple Bloom: Sure did! Now that I'm gettin' older, I wanna prove I can handle more responsibility on the farm.

Applejack: But the crates aren't marked. You kept track of what went into which crate, right?

Apple Bloom: Oh. Um... y-yep. I totally kept track of everything.

Applejack: Good. Because we wouldn't want Filthy Rich to get a shipment of cider when he's supposed to get zap apple jam. You know how Granny feels about sellin' cider anywhere but on the farm. Are you sure he got the right crates?

Apple Bloom: [huffs] Sure I'm sure! Now why don't you and Big Mac head on out to the house and let me finish up here? [glass jars rattle]

Applejack: If you gave Rich the zap apple jam, then what's this here?

Apple Bloom: Um... extra?

Top Bolt

Rainbow Dash: Cool. What's the bad news?

Twilight: Well, It's not exactly bad news.

[The cutie map shows Rainbow and Twilight's cutie marks circling the Wonderbolts Academy]

Rainbow Dash: [groans] I was just there!

To Where and Back Again — Part 1

Starlight: Thanks so much for doing this, Trixie. When Twilight said I should bring a friend, you were the first pony I thought of.

Trixie: Great idea, Princess Twilight. Asking me – Starlight's best friend – to help her on this difficult journey really shows how wise a princess you have really become.

Twilight: [through gritted teeth] Thanks, Trixie. [hushed, to Spike] I was talking about me.

Starlight: Hey, uh, Pinkie!

Changeling: (as Pinkie Pie) Hey... [beat] you!

Starlight: So... you're probably wondering why I'm back so soon.

Changeling: (as Pinkie Pie) Where were you?

Starlight: I... went to my old village? For the festival?

Changeling: (as Pinkie Pie) Ooh, sounds fun! How was it?

Starlight: It was kind of a disaster. I came back early because I freaked out!

Changeling: (as Pinkie Pie) Ooh, sounds awful! Bye!

Starlight: Twilight? Hello?

Changeling: (as Spike) What do you want? Twilight's very busy!

Starlight: Spike, I really need to speak with her.

Changeling: (as Spike) Make an appointment! She's a princess, after all!

Starlight and Luna: Something is wrong!

[wind blows]

Starlight: A dream? This is another dream!

Luna: [whispering] Starlight Glimmer!

Starlight: Princess Luna?

Luna: Starlight Glimmer!

Starlight: Princess Luna, where are you?

Luna: Starlight, there is no time! You must get help!

Starlight: What? What are you talking about? This is just a dream!

Luna: Not here! In the waking world! They've taken my sister and I! It's worse than the last time! Your dream called to me, and I was able to break through! You must find help!

Starlight: What are you saying?! Who's taken you?!

Luna: Be careful who you trust! You need all the help you can find! The changelings have returned and— [gasps]

Starlight: Princess Luna! [panting] They're back!

Starlight: Trixie? Trixie, it's Starlight! Are you awake?

Trixie: [muffled, bleary] Of course, Princess Celestia... I'd love to perform for peanut butter crackers...

Starlight: Trixie, wake up!

Trixie: [coughing] [tired] Starlight? What time is it?

Starlight: It's late. I think I figured out what's wrong with my friends!

Trixie: [yawning] I have a whole list of things that are wrong with your friends. We can go over it in the morning.

Discord: [hushed] They took Fluttershy?

Starlight: Yes!

Discord: [menacingly] Where?

Starlight: The Changeling Kingdom. With you on our side, I can—

Discord: [snaps fingers]

To Where and Back Again — Part 2

Fluttershy: [sniffs, crying] No. You're right. There's no way you should trust me. Just go find the others. [wailing] I understand!

Discord: Oh, come on!

Fluttershys: [crying]

Fluttershy #1: We're probably all changelings. You shouldn't rescue any of us. Unless, you think, maybe one of us might be the real Fluttershy. Oh, that certainly would be a nasty changeling trick, wouldn't it?

Fluttershys: [crying]

Fluttershy #2: I'm the real one.

Fluttershy #3: I'm the real one.

Fluttershy #4: I'm the real Fluttershy.

[splat]

Queen Chrysalis: [laughing evilly] One little pony all by herself. [joints cracking] Oh, how will I ever prevent this daring rescue?

[changelings screech]

[changelings hisses]

Queen Chrysalis: Well, well, well. The Princess of Friendship's sole pupil. Honestly, I didn't think you were worth replacing with one of my drones.

Thorax (as Starlight Glimmer): [strains] You won't get away with this!

Queen Chrysalis: I already have. Nopony is coming to save you. Your little squad was it. And now, there's just you.

Thorax (as Starlight Glimmer): Thorax is still out there.

Queen Chrysalis: Don't mention that traitor's name in my kingdom! He was a fool to leave and even more a fool to return! When I find him, he'll learn just what happens to those who betray the hive!

Thorax (as Starlight Glimmer): [whimpers]

Queen Chrysalis: And it seems I don't have far to look, do I...

Thorax (as Starlight Glimmer): [whimpers]

[transformation zap]

Queen Chrysalis: Thorax?!

[changelings hisses]

[pounding]

Starlight Glimmer: [whimpers]

[zap]

Queen Chrysalis: Very clever. And clearly Thorax revealed to you the secret of my throne. I can't have powerful ponies using their abilities against me. Even with your rather embarrasing little rescue attempt, everything has gone according to my plan.

Starlight Glimmer: What plan? Why did you do all this?!

Queen Chrysalis: So I could feed, of course! By replacing the most beloved figures in Equestria, my drones will be able to store all the love meant for them, and return it here to me. Everypony will do as I command, and my subjects and I will feed on their love for generations! [maniacal laughter]

Starlight Glimmer: What if you didn't have to?

Queen Chrysalis: Ridiculous! The hunger of changelings can never be satisfied!

Starlight Glimmer: Exactly! Thorax left the hive and made a friend. He shared love, and now he doesn't need to feed. You don't have to live your lives starving all the time!

Queen Chrysalis: You know nothing of the changelings or what it takes to be their queen! I decide what is best for my subjects, not some mewling grub!

Starlight Glimmer: I know what it's like to lead by fear and intimidation! And I know what it's like to want everypony to do what you say! But I was wrong. A real leader doesn't force her subjects to deny who they are! She celebrates what makes them unique and listens when one of them finds a better way!

Queen Chrysalis: The only thing Thorax has found is what happens to those who turn their back on the hive!

[dark magic]

Starlight Glimmer: No! Stop!

Queen Chrysalis: Just as soon as I drain every last ounce of love from him, and show my subjects what a real leader is!

[Queen Chrysalis begins to feed on Thorax's love]

Thorax: [straining] I can feel the love inside me slipping away...! I can't hold onto it much longer...!

Starlight Glimmer: Then don't! Sharing love is what made you different to begin with! You should share yours with Chrysalis! Give her all of it!

[Thorax concentrates and releases a wave of love power which blows Queen Chrysalis back; he gets enveloped in a cocoon which opens and magic blasts reveals him in a new form]

Starlight Glimmer: This is what happens when you give love freely instead of taking it!

[The rest of the Changelings share their love and transform into their new forms]

[kaboom!]

Discord: Fluttershy?

Fluttershy: It's, um, good to see you, too.

Twilight Sparkle: Starlight? What happened?

Starlight Glimmer: We defeated the changelings with no magic at all, they found a new leader, and... they're all kinda... good now.

Princess Luna: Well done, Starlight Glimmer. It seems as though you've learned a great deal since we last spoke.

[rubble moving]

Queen Chrysalis: [hissing]

[triumphant music]

Starlight Glimmer: When Twilight and her friends defeated me, I chose to run away and seek revenge! You don't have to! You can be the leader your subjects deserve.

[She offers her hoof like how Twilight did to her last season, and Queen Chrysalis reaches out hers, only to swat Starlight's away.]

Queen Chrysalis: There is no revenge you could ever conceive of that will come close to what I will exact upon you one day, Starlight Glimmer!

[She flies away to parts unknown.]

Princess Celestia: Thorax, as the new leader of the changelings, I look forward to discussing how we can improve our relationship in the future. However, for the moment, perhaps it is best that we leave the Changeling Kingdom to the changelings.

Discord: Splendid idea! Now who's ready for some celebratory tea at Fluttershy's?!

Fluttershy: Oh! Uh, everypony?

Starlight Glimmer: Actually, now that you can snap your claws and send us absolutely anywhere again, I think I have a better option.

Rainbow Dash: Somepony is really gonna have to catch us up on what we missed.