This is you, and this is your badness level. It's unusually high for someone your size.
[Nani is trying to take Stich back to the shelter] HE WAS AN ORPHAN AND WE ADOPTED HIM! WHAT ABOUT OHANA?!
[Stitch is looking at a picture of Lilo, Nani, and their parents] That's us, before... It was rainy one night, and they went for a drive. [Stitch looks sadly at Lilo and then the photo] What happened to yours? [Stitch looks surprised] I hear you cry at night. Do you dream of them?
[Stitch is running away] "Ohana" means "family". "Family" means nobody gets left behind. But if you want to leave, you can. I'll remember you though. [looking at the picture of her deceased parents] I remember everyone that leaves.
[on the phone] Hello, Cobra Bubbles? Aliens are attacking my house!
Jumba: Monstrosity?! What you see before you is the first of a new species. I call him Experiment 6-2-6. He is bullet-proof, fire-proof, and can think faster than supercomputer. He can see in the dark, and move objects three thousand times his size! His only instinct: TO DESTROY EVERYTHING HE TOUCHES![laughs maniacally]
Grand Councilwoman: So it is a monster.
Jumba:[nonchalantly] Hey, just a little one.
Gantu: It's an affront to nature! It must be destroyed!
Grand Councilwoman: Calm yourself, Captain Gantu. Perhaps it can be reasoned with. [to Stitch] Experiment 6-2-6, give us some sign you understand any of this. Show us there something inside you that is good.
Stitch: [clears throat]MEEGA, NALA KWEESTA!! (I WANT TO DESTROY)
Grand Councilwoman: So naughty!
Stitch: [laughs hysterically]
Jumba: I didn't teach him that!
Gantu: Place that idiot scientist under arrest!
Jumba: I prefer to be called "EVIL GENIUS"!
[In Jumba's cell after Stitch has escaped]
Jumba:[chuckles] He got away?
Grand Councilwoman: I'm sure this comes as no surprise to you.
Jumba: I designed this creature for it to be unstoppable.
Grand Councilwoman: Which is precisely why you must now bring him back.
Jumba: What, me?
Grand Councilwoman: And to reward you, we are willing to trade your freedom for his capture.
Jumba:[sighs] 6-2-6 will not come easily... Maybe direct hit from plasma-cannon might stun him long enough to--
Grand Councilwoman:[interrupting, exasperated] Plasma-cannon granted. Do we have a bargain, Dr. Jumba?
Jumba:[grunts and nods]
[After Lilo shows up to hula dance class late, soaking wet, Mertle, Elena, Teresa and Yuki slip in the puddles.]
Mr. Puloki: Stop, stop. Lilo, why are you all wet?
Lilo: It's sandwich day.
[Puloki looks confused]
Lilo: [sighs] Every Thursday, I take Pudge the fish a peanut butter sandwich.
Puloki: [still confused] Pudge is a fish...?
Lilo: [continues] And today we were out of peanut butter! So I asked my sister what to give him, and she said a tuna sandwich! I can't give Pudge tuna! [Whispers] Do you know what tuna is?
Lilo: IT'S FISH! If I gave Pudge tuna, I'd be an abomination! I'm late because I had to go to the store, and get peanut butter, cause all we have...is... [jumping angrily]IS STINKIN' TUNA!
Puloki: Lilo, Lilo. Why is this so important?
Lilo: [seriously] Pudge controls the weather.
[Everyone exchanges puzzled looks]
Mertle: You're crazy.
[Angry, Lilo attacks her; the other girls gather around Puloki as he picks up Lilo.]
Puloki: PLEASE, PLEASE! EVERYBODY CALM DOWN!
Puloki: Girls... (speaking Hawaiian) Shh. Lilo...
Lilo: I'm sorry, I'm sorry! I won't do it again!
Puloki: Maybe we should call your sister.
Lilo: No! I'll be good! I want to dance. I practiced. I just want to dance. I practiced.
Mertle: Ooh, she bit me.
Elena, Teresa and Yuki: Ewwwwwww!
Cobra Bubbles:[reaching down to shake hands with Lilo] Nice to meet you.
Lilo:[tilting her head as if to read something] Your knuckles say "Cobra." [Cobra Bubbles withdraws his hand, his knuckles crack] "Cobra Bubbles." You don’t look like a social worker.
Cobra Bubbles: I’m a special classification.
Lilo: Did you ever kill anyone?
Cobra Bubbles:[frowning] We’re getting off the subject. Today let's talk about you. Are you...happy?
Lilo:[opens her mouth wide to show a fake smile, sounding slightly bored, speaking in response to Nani’s pantomiming behind Cobra] I’m adjusted. I eat four food groups and look both ways when crossing the street. And take long naps... [Nani clenches a fist in a "Doing well" sign] and get disciplined?
Cobra Bubbles: Disciplined?
[Lilo continues, with Nani silently getting more and more frantic.]
Lilo: Yeah, she disciplines me real good. Sometimes five times a day. [Nani places her head in her hands in despair] With bricks. [Nani looks up in horror]
Lilo: Uh-huh. In a pillowcase.
Nani:[clamps her hand over Lilo's mouth]OKAY! That's enough sugar for you! [pushes Lilo in the direction out of the room and speaks through her clenched teeth] Why dontcha run along, ya little cutie? [nervously laughs, looking at Cobra Bubbles] The other social workers just thought she was a scream... Thirsty? [walks to the fridge awkwardly]
Nani: Why didn't you wait at school? You were supposed to wait there! Lilo! Do you not understand? Do you want to be taken away? [pause]Answer me!
Nani: No, you don't understand?
Nani: "No", what?
Lilo: NOOOO![drops to the floor and moans]
Nani: Ugh! You're such a pain!
Lilo: So why don't you sell me and buy a rabbit instead?!
Nani: At least a rabbit would behave better than you!
Lilo: Go ahead! Then you'll be happy! Because it'll be smarter than me, too!
Nani: AND QUIETER!
Lilo: You'll like it, 'cause it's stinky, LIKE YOU![goes to her bedroom and slams the door]
Nani: [furious but hysterical]GO TO YOUR ROOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM!!!!!!!!
Lilo: [opens door]I'M ALREADY IN MY ROOM!!![slams it again]
Nani: [picks up a pillow and screams into it]AAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHH!!!!
Lilo: [picks up a pillow and screams into it]AAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHH!!!!
Lilo:[trying to push Nani out of her room] Can't you go any faster?!
Nani:[leaning back] Oh, no! Gravity is increasing on me!
Lilo: No, it's not!
Nani: Is too, Lilo. The same thing happened yesterday. [Accidentally falls on top of Lilo]
Lilo: You rotten sister, your butt is crushing me! Why do you act so WEIRD?! [slams the door]
[Nani and Lilo are at an animal shelter looking for a pet dog.]
Nani: [to shelter worker] We're looking for something that can defend itself... something that won't die, something sturdy, you know?
Lilo: Like a lobster!
Nani: Lilo, you lolo. Do we have a lobster door? No. We don't have a lobster door. We have a dog door. We are getting a dog!
[Lilo comes back to the lobby with Stitch]
Shelter Worker: Oh, yes, all our dogs are adoptable... [jumps, startled]EXCEPT THAT ONE![runs and takes Stitch away from Lilo as Nani pulls Lilo away from Stitch]
Nani: What is that thing?
Shelter Worker: A dog...I think, but it was dead this morning.
Nani: It was dead this morning?!
Shelter Worker: Well, we thought it was dead; it was hit by a truck!
Lilo: I like him! Come here, boy.
Stitch: [Stitch forcefully, against the shelter worker's grip, walks himself forward to get to Lilo as she so called him to her, climbing up onto Nani and Lilo's laps]
Nani: [screams and pushes Stitch away from her and Lilo] Ah! [composes herself and asks] Wouldn't you like a different dog?
Shelter Worker: [a bit breathless] We have better dogs, dear.
Lilo: Not better than him! He can talk. Say hello.
Stitch: He... Hel...
Shelter Worker: Dogs can't talk, dear.
Stitch: [narrows his eyes and bares his teeth in frustration]
Lilo: He did.
Nani: Does it have to be this dog?
Stitch: [pants a few times before lolling his tongue out, sticking it up his nose and pulling out a big green bogie, eating it, smacking his lips]
Lilo: Yes, he's good. I can tell.
Shelter Worker: [filling out paperwork at the front desk] You'll have to think of a name for him.
Lilo: His name is... Stitch.
Shelter Worker: That's not a real name. [Nani shakes her head quickly and waves her hand as if saying 'NO! Don't say that!'] In...Iceland, but here it's a good name. Stitch, it is. And there's a $2.00 license fee.
Lilo: I want to buy him! [whispers] Can I borrow $2?
Nani: [with a semi-irritated look, Nani takes the money from the shelter worker and hands it to Lilo. Lilo then taps the money on her shoulder and hands it back to her, handing it to the shelter worker]
Shelter Worker: [stamps the adoption papers and hands the paper to Lilo with a friendly smile] He's all yours.