The Dukes of Hazzard (film)

The Dukes of Hazzard is a 2005 film about the Duke family of fictional Hazzard County, Georgia. Based on the hit television series that ran from 1979-1985, the story centers on the Dukes' efforts to save the family farm from the nefarious money-making schemes of Boss Hogg and his cronies.

Directed by Jay Chandrasekhar

Written by Jonathan Davis and John O'Brien

Cousins. Outlaws. Thrillbillies. Taglines

The Balladeer

(actor Junior Brown)

• "Jesse Duke has been to two places in his life: Hazzard County and Korea. As far as he's concerned, that's one place too many."
• "When you're flying by the seat of your pants, nothing sounds better than a Plan B."

Jesse Duke

(actor Willie Nelson)

• "The only way I'm leavin' the ranch is in a wooden box!"
• Guy come out of an antique shop carrying a big grandfather's clock. Bumped into this drunk, broke the clock.

Guy said, "Why don't you watch where you're going." The drunk says, "Why don't you carry a wristwatch like everybody else."

• "An apple a day will keep the doctor away, darling."

"Do you know why devorces are so expensive? Because they are worth it!"

Roscoe P. Coltrane

(actor M.C. Gainey)

• (To Cooter) "Boy, you couldn't fix an election if your brother was the governor!"

Daisy Duke

(actress Jessica Simpson)

• "I think something bounced up into my undercarriage."
• "Enos, where's Boss Hogg and Roscoe?" (Enos- At your farm) "Thank you Enos. That might be a new record."

Mr. Prickett

• (To Daisy about his car) "She's faster than a cheetah on cocaine."

Dialogue

Jesse Duke: Know what happens when you give a politician Viagra?

Luke Duke: No.

Jesse Duke: He gets taller!

---

Jesse Duke: You know why tornadoes and blonds are so much alike?

Luke Duke: No.

Jesse Duke: At first, there's a lot of sucking and blowing, and then you lose your house.

---

Jesse Duke: Know what you get when you cross a donkey with an onion?

Luke Duke: No.

Jesse Duke: You get a piece of ass that'll bring a tear to your eye.

---

Jesse Duke: You know why divorces are so expensive?

Luke Duke: No.

Jesse Duke: Because they're worth it!

---

Sheev: Hmm, might be a wet fuse.

Bo Duke: Maybe its backwards.

Sheev: It's supposed to be backwards, it's a Chinese fuse.

Bo Duke: No, I mean it's backwards from the way it's supposed to be.

Sheev: Have you ever been to China? Have you ever been to China?

Bo Duke: I ate Chinese food once.

Sheev: Yeah, well you don't blow up Mu Shu Pork my friend.

Bo Duke: I dated a Korean girl in high school.

Sheev: That is a totally different Oriental nation. Get an education!

Bo Duke: You're the one who got the fuse wrong.

Cast

• Johnny Knoxville as Luke Duke
• Seann William Scott as Bo Duke
• Jessica Simpson as Daisy Duke
• Burt Reynolds as Boss Hogg
• Willie Nelson as Uncle Jesse Duke
• David Koechner as Cooter Davenport
• M.C. Gainey as Sheriff Rosco P. Coltrane
• Michael Weston as Deputy Enos Strate
• Lynda Carter as Pauline
• James Roday as Billy Prickett
• Kevin Heffernan as Derek "Sheev" Sheevington
• Nikki Griffin as Katie-Lynn Johnson
• Jacqui Maxwell as Annette
• Alice Greczyn as Laurie Pullman
• Junior Brown as The Balladeer (narrator)
• Joe Don Baker as Governor Jim Applewhite
• Barry Corbin as Bill Pullman