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Grown Ups 2

2013 film by Dennis Dugan
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Grown Ups 2 is a 2013 American buddy comedy film directed by Dennis Dugan, and produced by Adam Sandler. The film is the sequel to Grown Ups (2010). The film is produced by Sandler's production company Happy Madison and distributed by Columbia Pictures. The film was released on July 12, 2013.

Dialogue

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[standing on the cliff, looking down at the water and all the college kids partying]
Lenny Feder: Look at this. Beers on ice, hot ladies everywhere, this is how we used to do it.
Frat Guy: This is Kappa Eta Sigma property, so you might wanna quit pervin' on our ladies and get back to your trailer homes.
Lenny Feder: Okay, easy there, Abercrombie.
Kurt McKenzie: I haven't been around this many arrogant white college kids since Eminem played Duke.
Other Frat Guy: At least we got into college, skinny Danny Glover.
[two fray guys perform a silly multi-step "handshake" that the Grown Ups disapprove of]
Lenny Feder: Hey, fellas, that was a good handshake, we've got a good one too, it goes like this.
[they shake hands in a traditional, polite manner]
Kurt McKenzie: How are you doing, sir?
Eric Lamonsoff: Very good, nice to see you.
[Kurt jumps off the cliff naked and screaming, does a bellyflop into the water, and surfaces, shrieking in pain]
Lenny: You guys are losers!
[Jumps off screaming, lands on his testicles, and surfaces, screaming in a much higher octave]
Marcus: Don't worry [points to his penis] it gets bigger!
[Jumps off screaming and lands on his back]
Frat Boy: Oh, that poor old lady!
Marcus: [surfaces, winded and whimpering] Paralyzed, I'm paralyzed! Ooh, so much pain!
Eric: MAMAAAAAAAA!
[Jumps off screaming, lands on Marcus, and they both surface]
Marcus: [snapping at Eric] I WAS INSIDE YOU!!
[The frat boys all laugh and whoop at the group as they throw their clothes down to them]
Kurt: I can't believe nobody's even scared of a black guy anymore! DAMN YOU, OBAMA!!
[Cuts to Andre and Greg with disturbed looks on their faces, having seen the whole thing]
Andre: What the hell just happened?
Greg: I saw my dad's dick!
[Both look at each other and shudder]
Lenny Feder: Hey, you showed up.
Frat Guy: Where do you work out, Cinnabon?
[kicks Lenny in the face with an aerial acrobatic kick]
[on the ground, looking up]
Lenny Feder: What were you raised by, ninjas?
Roxanne Chase-Feder: I'm so glad we left the city, this is such a good place to raise family.
Lenny Feder: Riding your bike to school in the morning, you couldn't do that in L.A.
Keithie Feder: Yeah, thank God there's nothing crazy ever happens around here.
Officer Fluzoo: What's up with the school bus?
Lenny Feder: (nervous) Okay...I stole it.
Officer Fluzoo: Put your hands in the air. [The five friends put their hands in the air, but Fluzoo begins dancing and sings] And wave 'em like you just don't care. Say HO!
All: OH!
Officer Fluzoo: Say HO!
All: OH!
Male Cheerleader (Andy Samberg): Your car is filthy!
[Lenny, in bed, opens his eyes to find a deer at the side of his bed, looking right at him]
Lenny Feder: [turns to Roxanne, sleeping, and whispers] Honey, go over to the window and open it as wide as you can.
Roxanne: [whimpers and rolls over] Please let me sleep.
Lenny Feder: I think your mother's here from Mexico and she needs to leave. Open the window, now.
[Roxanne rolls over and sees the deer and is startled]
Roxanne: Why don't you do it you-Ahhhhhhhh!
[deer, also startled, raises up on rear legs and urinates, spraying on Lenny's face]
Roxanne: Close your mouth!
Becky Feder: Will I have boobies like Mommy's?
Lenny Feder: I don't ever want you to have those.
Nick: There's a raft in there? [he pokes the box and it self-inflates, knocking him down, along with a whole row of products] Who did that?
Malcolm: Well, well, well, if it isn't Hollywood and the squares.
Lenny Feder: Hey, Malcolm, I didn't know you worked at K-Mart, and apparently, the hair on the top of your head didn't know it either.
Malcolm: Whaat?
Lenny Feder: Mommy was nice enough to prepare her famous Chicken a la Food Poisoning, which we're all excited to eat.
Eric Lamonsoff: What's 7 + 9?
Bean Lamonsoff: 79!
Eric Lamonsoff: [sarcastically] Well, we're not going to have to pay for college, that's for sure!
Aerobics Instructor: Welcome to Squat-robics 101. Any questions?
Jackie Tardio: Are you married?
Roxanne: Do you like my hair?
Deanne McKenzie: Can I stick my tongue down your throat please?
[after screaming at Roxanne in front of the children, who runs upstairs, crying]
Keith Feder: Tell her it wasn't you talking, Dad. It was your flabby ass.
Lenny Feder: You want me to "accidentally" break the other leg? [Keith looks at him shocked]
[the Frat boys have arrived at the Feder's who are ready to get revenge]
Roxanne Feder: Excuse me, why are you here? What's the matter?
Frat Boy Milo: [mocking Roxanne] I tell you what is the matter. [frat boys laugh, speaking in normal accent] These old townies trashed our frat house! And nobody treats our good-times headquarters with disrespect! [all frat boys yell "Yeah!"]
Braden Higgins: They didn't do it. Me do it.
Frat Boy Milo: Don't try and cover for him, Z-Dog!
Lenny Feder: Who's Z-Dog?
Frat Boy Andy: We know they're trying to get back at us for making them do the naked plunge in our swimming hole.
Deanne McKenzie: Your swimming hole? I've been swimming at the quarry since I was eight years old.
Frat Boy Andy: Apparently, everybody in this crap town has been swimming there since they were eight years old. I guess nobody wants to leave this dump because they're too busy sucking! [all frat boys cheer, Andy and Milo do their handshake, but stop in the middle] We'll finish later.
Frat Boy Milo: You promise?
Frat Boy Andy: [touching Milo's cheek] I promise.
Frat Boy Milo: Okay.
Dickey Bailey: Hey, smart guy! Lenny Feder left this town, moved to Hollywood, made big bucks, probably more money than all you brainiacs put together ever will. But guess what? He came back here. 'Cause this beautiful town is his home. And it always will be his home. [looks at Lenny, who nods of approval, Dickey raises his beer, and takes a drink]
Frat Boy Milo: Well, that was just a moving testament to this community, bro! But we didn't come here to hear any lame speeches. We came here to kick some old, smelly ass! [frat boys cheer, Milo turns around and bends over, and Andy slaps his butt three times]
Lenny Feder: Fellas, we may be old.
Marcus Higgins: We may be smelly.
Deanne McKenzie: We may have a penis. [she, Roxanne, and a drunk woman point at Beefcake Kitty]
Eric Lamonsoff: But the only ones getting their ass kicked around here is gonna be you spoiled, privileged, uppity, preppy D-bags.
Kurt McKenzie: You hear that? Now let's get BUSY!! [everyone starts fighting]
Frat Boy Milo: [after ripping off Malcolm's toupee, revealing his bald head, giving him a noogie] Oh my god! Did you see his head? He's got a...he's bald! I got a wild one! I got a wild one! Whoo hoo hoo!
[Officer Fluzoo comes bashing out of a playhouse]
Frat Boy Milo: Noogie, noogie, noogie!
Officer Fluzoo: [standing behind Milo] Nobody noogies my brother! [grabs him, and gives him a rather violent noogie]
Frat Boy Milo: My brain! My brain! [Fluzoo throws Milo over the roof, who ends up landing in a bush] B.U.!
Malcolm: Hey man, I had that one.
Officer Fluzoo: I know you did, big brother.
Malcolm: Get out of here!
Officer Fluzoo: [flinches, terrified] Don't hit me!

Cast

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