What Women Want

What Women Want (2000) is a romantic comedy film, directed by Nancy Meyers and starring Mel Gibson and Helen Hunt.

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You talk to me like a woman, you think like a woman. Nick, come on, admit it. You're totally and completely gay!

You know what's the difference between a wife and a job? After fifteen years, a job still sucks.

[Imitating Sean Connery from The Hunt for Red October ] "Adver-sary?" Surely, you mean "adversary", old boy?

[Examining the contents of the box that Darcy gave to find inspiration] "Nobody panic, this is supposed to be fun." Alright, I can do this, I'm a professional. [Reaches into the box and pulls out..] Lipstick, alright. Lipstick on a guy's collar? No, women will hate that. Lipstick on a guy's collar that won't rub off. No, that's much worse. Okay, I need to start thinking like a broad. [Closes his eyes] Alright, I'm a broad. I see lipstick...[Sniffs the lipstick] on a dark-haired Tahitian beauty standing under a waterfall, wearing nothing but a thong, and water cascading down her back- [His eyes shoot open] I'm a lesbian!

[Drunkedly singing along with the song Bitch ] I'm a bitch, I'm a mother, I'm a brother, it's confusing, as I volumize my hair, and I am not aware...

[After going through a painful attempt to wax his leg hair] Women are insane. Who would do that more than once? ...Why would they do the other leg?

Why do guys like to do it in front of a mirror? Because "objects appear larger than they actually are".

You know that whole deal about "penis envy"? Not true. No. Half of women don't even like it. You know who has penis envy? We do. That's why we cheat and we lie, because we're all obsessed with our own equipment!

Then don't let a little thing like me firing you stand in your way.
What kind of knight in shining armor would I be if the man I love needs rescuing and I just let him walk out my door?
[Thinking] I'm flirting, what is wrong with me? [turns around and looks away, then back at him, but...] Oh, God, I just looked at his penis! I just hope he didn't see me... [Nick ruffles his pants; Darcy covers her eyes with her hands as Nick laughs] Oh shit, I just looked at it again! Stop it!

I think this is the one! '[thinking] I can't believe this it what I'll be wearing the last night I'm a virgin! ...Or should I say, what I'll be taking off?'

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What Women Want