Poker Night 2
2013 sequel to Poker Night at the Inventory
Poker Night 2 is a poker video game developed by Telltale Games. It is the sequel to Poker Night at the Inventory and, like its predecessor, features crossover characters from different franchises.
QuotesEdit
- GLaDOS: Good evening. This completes the first test of the contestants' poker faces. Bad news is you all failed miserably. The good news is you appear to be evenly matched. (Departs)
- GLaDOS: The player has been eliminated due to lack of funds. And intelligence.
- Sam: Hey, I won again. I wonder what that means?
- Max: Means you're on a roll baby! Bet everything!
- Max: [holding a chainsaw in front of Ash] Looking for something? Check it out, Sam! I'm a tree surgeon!
- Sam: [nonchalantly, to Ash] He's not really a tree surgeon.
- Max: Open wide and say "AH!"
- Ash: You're killing me here, GLaDOS.
- GLaDOS: If I were actually killing you, there would be a lot more screaming. And irony.
- GLaDOS: It's a mathematical certainty that 80% of you are going to lose tonight. And 100% of you will eventually die. (Beat) Math is fun, don't you think?
- GLaDOS: (ring) Excuse me. I have to take this. Something or someone appears to be exploding back at the lab. (powers down)
- Sam: You know, I've met a lot of robots, but I don't think I've come across one with trans-dimensional cell phone coverage.
- Brock: Yeah, well, that's the least of robot girl secrets.
- Claptrap: We're not talking "Crying Game" secrets, are we?
- Brock: Not even close. The way I hear it, when GLaDOS was plugged in, she went cuckoo bananas and wiped out the scientists that created her.
- Sam: You'd be amazed how many robots do that.
- Brock: And now she haunts the lifeless labs of Aperture Science performing inhuman experiments on anyone unlucky enough to fall in her mechanical clutches.
- Claptrap: That. Is. So. Hot!
- GLaDOS: (powers up) False alarm, everyone. The explosions turned out to be implosions; which are much easier to contain. Did I miss anything?
- All: (negatory remarks)
- GLaDOS: Did you know that the term 'blinds' was coined by a blind poker in the 19th century? Of course you didn't. Because it's a lie. In any event, I'm upping the blinds to 1200 to 2400.
- GLaDOS: Management froze me out of the lighting systems after I created a strobe effect to induce seizures in a bus full of freemasons. It was an... illuminating experiment.
- Ash: You made that up just for the pun, didn't you?
- GLaDOS: Maybe. Say cheese. (flashes camera)
- GLaDOS: Brock Sampson has been eliminated.
- Brock: This is a joke, right?
- GLaDOS: I'm not very good at jokes, but here's one: What's yellow and black and red all over?
- Brock: What?
- GLaDOS: Brock Sampson if he doesn't leave this table.
- Brock: Uhh... good one.
- GLaDOS: Congratulations. You've won. I'm hoping you weren't expecting baked desserts, because I don't do that anymore.
- GLaDOS: Actually, my scans indicate that Mr. Williams' hand is fully functional, and its nervous tapping appears to be induced by an outside force. I'll see if I can isolate it.
- Brock: Don't bother, it's morse code.
- Ash: What?
- Brock: D... R... I... N...
- GLaDOS: K. M. O. R. E. B.
- Brock: A... N... A... N... G...
- Ash: Drink more Banang. Huh.
- GLaDOS: Your hand has apparently been possessed by a marketing department.
- GLaDOS: It appears you have lost all your chips. Oh well. It's only money. Your money. $20,000 of it. Right down the drain.
- GLaDOS: The robot from Pandora is out of chips.
- Claptrap: Darn it, I forgot to turn on my poker subroutine. Can I get a do-over?
- GLaDOS: Your question has activated my rarely used giggle center. (softly) Tee. Hee.
- Claptrap: Rats!
- GLaDOS: Congratulations. You've converted a nearly unbeatable hand into a victory.
- Claptrap: Why can't I get cards like that?
- GLaDOS: Because you're a moron.
- Claptrap: Well, I'd like a second opinion on that.
- Brock: It's true. You're a moron.
