Justified (TV series)

Stars of the show Justified

Justified (2010–) is an American TV show, airing on FX, about U.S. Marshal Raylan Givens, a modern day 19th century-style lawman, who enforces his brand of justice to put a target on his back with criminals and puts him at odds with his bosses in the Marshal service. As a result, he gets reassigned to the U.S. District covering the town where he grew up. It is based on Elmore Leonard's novels Pronto and Riding the Rap and his short story "Fire in the Hole".

Season 1Edit

Fire in the Hole [1.01]Edit

Tim: They all say the same, two white males drove up in a dark SUV, they parked at that corner by the curb, one male got out with what looked like a bazooka, he said a few words and then fired at the church.
Raylan: What'd he say when he got out of the SUV?
Tim: One said it was "Liars and Hoes." Another heard "Time to go." My favorite's "Heidi heidi ho."

Boyd: Ava, get us a shot of Jim— [Ava loads her shotgun]
Ava: You wanna know what Bowman said when he looked up and he saw me with his deer rifle?
Boyd: God damn, woman, you only shoot people when they're eatin' supper?

Raylan: I guess I never thought of myself as an angry man.
Winona: Honestly, you're the angriest man I've ever known.

Riverbrook [1.02]Edit

Police officer: Going solo again?
Raylan: Another deputy in the car.
Police officer: Learned your lesson?
Raylan: Until I forget it.

Art: I got a call this morning from AUSA David Vasquez. Wants to talk to you about you shooting Boyd Crowder.
Raylan: What's there to talk about? He pulled first. There was a witness.
Art: But you see, ten days ago you shot a man in Miami. Put it like this: you were in the first grade; bit a kid every week? They'd start to think of you as a biter.

Boyd: The real question is, why didn't you kill me? Did you miss my heart on purpose?
Raylan: No...I was aiming to kill. That's the way I was taught. Sometimes you don't hit the bullseye.
Boyd: No, I suppose not.

Raylan: If you're going to talk, I'll put you in the trunk and drive myself.
Dewey: I can't drive handcuffed to the damned steering wheel!
Raylan: You'll get the hang of it.

Fixer [1.03]Edit

Arnold Pinter: I hate it here. Kentucky. I hate every one of these toothless, banjo strumming, red neck pricks.

Art: I love how these guys are so calm when you're coughing up blood.

Art: Raylan, I got a courtesy call from the Harlan County Sheriff's Department — your daddy was arrested.
Raylan: Did he kill anybody?

Long in the Tooth [1.04]Edit

Raylan: You ever consider I happen to be good at the job?
Rachel: And you being a tall, good-looking white man with a shitload of swagger, that has nothing to do with it? You get away with just about anything.
Raylan: What do I get away with?
Rachel: Look in the mirror. How do you think it'd go over if I came into work one day wearing a cowboy hat? You think I'd get away with that?
Raylan: Want to try it on?

Raylan: I can only imagine how hard it has been for you to get where you are in the Marshal service
Rachel: Because I'm black or because I'm a woman?
Raylan: Because you're an idiot.

Younger Mobster: [discussing Pulp Fiction] I'm saying, why does he still have his gun out in the first place? When's the last time you rode around in a car holding your gun?
Older Mobster: 'Cause it's a movie! That don't happen, then there's no movie. No messy car, no cleaner. I mean, what do they do? They drive home, jerk off, take a nap?

Raylan: Looks like we have a sniper on the Mexican side.
Roland: Well, that's not going to help tourism.

Raylan: Are you armed?
Roland: Well, I just had my dick in my hand.

The Lord of War and Thunder [1.05]Edit

Art: You've been in here for three days, and you've got no sign.
Rachel: Not no sign. His ex-wife has been packing in a lot of beer.
Art: Well, get a search warrant.
Rachel: Can't get a warrant based on beer consumption.
Art: How do you know?
Raylan: We tried.

Raylan: [about Arlo] Why can't you bail him out?
Helen: Those are the first words out of your mouth?
Raylan: I'm sorry, I'll start again. I see you're still smoking.
Helen: You still piss in your bed?
Raylan: No, you see, I gave up my bad habits.

Arlo: I heard about you shooting Boyd.
Raylan: Hmm.
Arlo: All I need is a bunch of Crowders wanting revenge on a Givens.
Raylan: Well, I think I'm higher up on their list.

Arlo: Where were you, woman?
Helen: Down in the parking lot, giving blowjobs for cash.
Arlo: Were you paying or were they?

Johnny: You shot my cousin.
Raylan: No, no. God shot Boyd. Ask him. He'll tell you I saved his soul.

The Collection [1.06]Edit

Ava: You're tarnished with the dark stain of divorce.
Raylan: My marriage ended a little bit more amicably than yours.
Ava: Funny, why did your marriage end?
Raylan: It seemed like a good idea at the time.

Raylan: I figure people have a right to their hobbies and I have a right to find those people creepy.

Hanselman: Next time you're in Cincinnati, come by the gallery, I'll show you my collection. I think you'll be quite surprised.
Raylan: Honestly, I'd rather stick my dick in a blender.
Art: Well, that would solve a few problems.

Art : Are you cold standing out here?
Raylan: [without his shirt on] Not really. Why?
Art: 'Cause I can't keep from staring at your nipples!
Raylan: I'll be out in ten.
Art: Thank you!

Blind Spot [1.07]Edit

Art: Just what part of being under investigation confuses you, Raylan?
Raylan: So many things confuse me, Art.
Art: Do you think we're going to banter here? Cause we're not.

Art: [to Raylan] I tell you to do one simple thing — refrain from screwing the witness in your own shooting — and you can't even do that!

Boyd: What brings you to my house?
Raylan: Oh, this is your house now?
Boyd: Why, yes, prison is my home.

Mosley: You know what they say about back woods cabins in Harlan, they're like assholes, sawed off shotguns and pick-up trucks.
Ava: Everybody's got one.

Blowback [1.08]Edit

Raylan: [to Wallace] You seem pretty stable. Although, you did spend all morning with a shiv up your ass.

Vasquez: You must be glad to finally find a professional use for your office bottle, aren't you?
Art: I don't know what you're talking about. I was as surprised to find it as anyone else.

Bo Crowder: Howdy, Marshal, I sure am glad you could join us.
Raylan: Oh, no, no, no. I'm not joining you. You were just leaving.

Hatless [1.09]Edit

Raylan: I shot people I like more for less.

Raylan: If I wanted to ask Duffy, I'd have his gun pointed at him.

Bartender: Wouldn't it be easier just to buy a new hat?
Raylan: Probably, but I ain't looking for easy.

The Hammer [1.10]Edit

Ava: Didn't the district attorney order you to stay away from Boyd?
Raylan: It was more of a suggestion.

Boyd: Truth always sounds like lies to a sinner.

Boyd: I asked him to shut down his poison factory and merely made an observation about its combustibility.

Reardon: [to Raylan] You are every inch the Goddamn gunslinger I've heard.

Veterans [1.11]Edit

Boyd: You gonna introduce me to your friends?
Raylan: Oh, my mistake, I'm sorry. Yes, of course, Art Mullen, chief deputy of this office, my boss. I thought you guys had met that night I shot you, but of course you were unconscious by the time he showed up.

Boyd: Raylan, we're getting precipitously close to the moment I ask to have my lawyer present.

Raylan: [about Ava] I need to convince her to get out of Kentucky.
Winona: And you think dumping her, handcuffed, at your ex-wife's house is going to do the trick?

Raylan: [Tim drives up to the veterans club] We interrupting anything?
Tim: I've been off the clock since five, so...
Art: You drunk?
Tim: I was headed in that direction, til this detour. No admission, huh? Did you try flirtin'?
Raylan: He was immune to my charms.
Art: Said "heroes only".
Tim: Oh, OK. You show them your ass wound?
Art: Well, I didn't think it was that kind of evening.
Tim: [to door guard] Evening, soldier. Uh, I didn't bring my cape. I'm guessing this will suffice.

Arlo: [looking up at Raylan and Art] How'd ya get in?
Raylan: [gestures to Tim] Deputy Gutterson served in Afghanistan.
Arlo: He a mess-hall cook?
Raylan: Sniper in the Rangers.
Arlo: So he's the shit.
Raylan: Mm-hmm.

Fathers and Sons [1.12]Edit

Arlo: I just spent an hour next to a nut job with a live grenade. Turns out I ain't as afraid of death as I used to be.

Drug Chemist: Listen Lynyrd Skynyrd, next time we're opening a dick sucking business, I'll ask for your advice.

Vasquez: Chief, how is your coffee here?
Raylan and Art: BAD!
Vasquez: Let's get some.

Winona: How do you take your coffee?
Ava: With a little bourbon.
Winona: Ooh! All right.

Art: [to Raylan] That's my bottle. I'm not going to let you drink it all just because your daddy didn't hug you much when you were little.

Bulletville [1.13]Edit

Arlo: You've known me 50 years.
Bo Crowder: Should that incline me to trust you more or less?

Bo Crowder: Who am I kiddin'? I can't hurt my own son. [pause] Johnny, hurt my son.

Raylan: I'm Raylan Givens!
Boyd: No, I'm Raylan Givens!
Raylan: You tryin' to be funny?
Boyd: A little.

Boyd: Where you going?
Raylan: I'm going after the young lady with the automatic weapon.
Boyd: I'll get her.
Raylan: What are you gonna do after you get her?
Boyd: I ain't quite figured that out yet. Are you gonna shoot to stop me?
Raylan: Maybe.
Boyd: I'm pretty sure you're empty.
Raylan: You gonna bet your life on that?
Boyd: No Raylan, I'm gonna bet my life on you being the only friend I have left in this world.

Art: [about Boyd] Maybe he's become some vigilante.
Raylan: Hmmm, maybe he's Batman.

Season 2Edit

The Moonshine War [2.01]Edit

Raylan: Alright look, I've tried to be reasonable. You give me your word in ten seconds or I shoot you in the head.

Raylan: So, you want to transfer me?
Art: Honestly, Raylan, I don't know who would take you.

Mags: [after poisoning Walt] Oh, this is the bad part, but it doesn't last long. Mixture's all natural, from up in the hills. All kinds of knowledge up in the hills. Something my grandmama taught me. She learned it from her grandmama.
Walt: Loretta?
Mags: I'll raise her myself. Don't you think that'll be better for her? Then the way it's been around here with you and your sadness. All the troubles of your hard life, it's all gone now. You get to know the mystery, Walt. You get to see your Sally Ann again.

Raylan: Now look, normally I would have just shot you myself the second you pulled, but I am doing my level best to avoid the paper work and the self-recrimination that comes with it, though Lord knows that you are the kind that makes it worth it more. Come on, Jimmy, can't we just try to end this without you turning yourself into the Human Torch?

Raylan: Woah woah, okay. I'm just gonna ask you one question. Do you know how a firearm works?
Jimmy: What?
Raylan: The key word in firearm is "fire." When the pin hits the cap, makes the charge explode, meaning there's a spark, which should be of some concern to a man soaked in gasoline.
Jimmy: That's bullshit. That spark's too far away from the gasoline.
Raylan: You didn't finish school, did you, Mr. Dean?

The Life Inside [2.02]Edit

Boyd: My outlaw ways are behind me.
Raylan: Just you saying that scares the shit out of me.

Arlo: I hope you get cancer!
Helen: Already had it!
Arlo: I hope you get it again!

Raylan: I saw a man threaten to shoot a pregnant woman through the belly, just before a bullet went through his brain so... I guess you could say, it wasn't good.
Winona: I can handle that, Raylan. I can't handle silence.

Winona: Sometimes I look at you and I never wanna see you again.
Raylan: Other times?
Winona: There are no other times, just that...Raylan...other times I wanna run away with you to Costa Rica.

The I of the Storm [2.03]Edit

Boyd: I was wondering if back when we were digging coal together that you had an inkling of the man that I might someday become.
Raylan: You mean just 40 and still single?

Art: Hell of a shot. Did you consider what might have happened if you'd missed?
Tim: I can't carry a tune. I don't know how to shoot a basketball and my handwriting is, uh, barely legible. But I don't miss.

Dewey: You know, Boyd... for a guy who supposedly changed, you sound an awful lot like you always did.

For Blood or Money [2.04]Edit

Art: [about Rachel] She's the best marshal I've got.
Raylan: You realize I'm sitting right here?
Art: I do.

Art: You're getting old.
Raylan: Not as old as you.
Art: And you're a dick.

Rachel: When I was Nick's age, before my father's cancer, I thought we were the Cosbys. My parents had good jobs, there was a feast on the table after church on Sundays. Shawnee and I would ride our Huffys around the neighborhood. We had good hair, and made straight A's. Except, as my mother reminds me, that wasn't reality. The jobs weren't all that good, and my father was never a happy man even before he got sick. And Shawnee was smoking pot at 9 and running away to smoke heroin at 15.
Raylan: I never bore any illusions that my family was the Cosbys.
Art: Your family wasn't funny.
Tim: At least you got to shoot your father. Mine had the nerve to die before I got back from Basic with skills and a loaded weapon.
Raylan: You didn't miss much. I thought it was gonna be way more fun than it was.

Doyle: I had nothing to do with it.
Mags: Other than shootin' a couple of assholes to keep 'em from talking.
Doyle: Yeah, well... that.

Cottonmouth [2.05]Edit

Ava: Why did you agree to rob that mine in the first place?
Boyd: Because it's what I do. It's who I am, Ava. As hard as I've been trying to pretend otherwise. Everybody else seems to know that but me.

Boyd: Part of me felt like just laying down, letting it happen.
Ava: But you killed them instead?

Marcus: This is a robbery!
Shelby Parlow: Well shit son, I can see that.

Ava: Damn it, Boyd. What the hell you gone made me a part of?
Boyd: Just saving my life.

Tom Bergen: Art, I've been in Harlan 18 years. People still look at me like I'm some kinda Yankee come down to burn their crops. But this guy...
Raylan: I know my people.
Art: You're like the hillbilly whisperer. We oughta put you on Oprah.

Coover: Ma ain't never left me in charge... Dickie neither. Here you sit?
Loretta: Well it ain't as glamorous as it looks.

Blaze of Glory [2.06]Edit

Art: If you run, I'm gonna put a bullet in that tank. You remember the end of Jaws?

Raylan: You know where I'm from, asshole?
Carter: No.
Raylan: Harlan County.
Carter: So?
Raylan: [punches Carter] Down there we know the difference between dynamite and road flares.

Winona: [to Raylan] The one who kicked me in the face... if you get the chance, shoot him in the nuts.

ATF Agent: Did she screw all your relatives? Or just you two?
Boyd: Now sir, I know you have an investigation to conduct but if you disrespect Ava one more time, I'm gonna come across this table.

Art: I think a threat against a federal officer would be a little more specific. Something more along the lines of, "If you disrespect Miss Crowder again I'll beat the ever loving shit out of ya."

Save My Love [2.07]Edit

Raylan: I'm surprised to see you here.
Boyd: Without shackles or an attorney present? It's a little strange for me too.

Winona: I got distracted.
Judge Reardon: [about Raylan] I can see your tall drink of distraction right here.

Boyd: Raylan. Raylan, I would never presume to tell you how to do your job and I understand that I am very new in this security game. However, I have spent a considerable amount of time hiding explosives. Now if you would like, I'd be more than happy to walk around here with you, show you where would I hide mine, in case there might be a place that you might miss.

Raylan: The truth is, I don't know if you can trust Boyd to have your back but well, he has tried to kill me, and I have shot him, and imprisoned him and I wouldn't be surprised if our paths again cross in such a manner. He has had my back on two occasions. Once was the last day I was in the mine, and the other not so long ago.
Carolyn Johnson: My, sounds like a love story.

Raylan: You think he was telling the truth?
Art: Well he's a bank robber Raylan, why would he lie to me?

The Spoil [2.08]Edit

Kid: No spikes, no seeds, no helmet, no hitting.
Raylan: Nothing about no beating the shit out of a teenager though. I guess that'd be okay then.
Kid: Hey I'll call the cops.
Art: Kid, we are the cops.

Art: You're dropping your shoulder.
Raylan: No I ain't.
Art: Maybe you're not. I never played any baseball.

Dickie: What are you boys up to now? Hmmm? You got yourselves some business up here?
Boyd: Oh same as you, I'd wager. Except of course, mine's legitimate.

Brothers Keeper [2.09]Edit

Ava: You sure you know what you're doing?
Boyd: I'm making it up as I go, but I sure am happy you elected to come along.

Mags: [to Boyd] Now sit your bony ass down and listen to my counter offer while there are still pieces of you big enough to find.

Debts and Accounts [2.10]Edit

Winona: Who are they?
Raylan: Lord knows. Any number of people who are trying to kill me.

Raylan: I've been wondering if I'm just a criminal at heart, ya know, truly my father's son.

Boyd: My name is Boyd Crowder. You can come after me if you want but it will be the last thing you ever do, I promise you that.

Mags: Wherever your boys grow up, do you think they'd be better off doing it with or without their daddy? You figure out that next time before you open your mouth to me.

Art: [to Raylan] I thought at one point that maybe someday you and I'd be able to look back at all this and laugh, but shit, I don't think you're gonna live that long. You just go on and do what you do, and I'll just cleaning up after ya, and sooner or later this problem's gonna solve itself.

Full Commitment [2.11]Edit

Raylan: Well I gotta talk to some people... alone. So... Either you let me go, or I'm gonna have to give you the slip.
Tim: I love this shit. This shit gets me hard.
Raylan: Well, we've both been warned then.

Raylan: We're gonna end this right now.
Duffy: That sounds ominous.

Tim: [to Raylan, about Winona] So yeah let's go see your ex-wife, girlfriend, whatever it is we're calling her.

Dan: Let me get this straight. When Art gives you orders, you actually follow them? Or are you just saying that to hurt my feelings?

Raylan: [to Tim] Listen, I gotta make a phone call that I'm not supposed to make, that if you overheard you should report, so you wanna go outside and check the perimeter? Or do I have to pretend to take a shower?

Reckoning [2.12]Edit

Boyd: We can draw him out.
Raylan: How would we do that? Take you to the middle of town, tie you to a tree, and wait?

Raylan: Give me one reason why I shouldn't come up there and kick the living shit out of you.
Boyd: I'll give you 15 reasons in the mag, and one in the chamber.

Mags: You wanna be in charge? Is that what this is about?
Dickie: I want what's coming to me.

Bloody Harlan [2.13]Edit

Raylan: Doyle, I need you and your boys to put your guns down.
Doyle Bennett: And why would we do that?
Raylan: Maybe you don't wanna see your brother's brains fly through the air.

Art: Assume the position... NOW. Do you dumb-ass peckerwoods understand English? On the ground, hillbillies! NOW!

Boyd: Are you asking me or are you telling me?
Raylan: Well, if it makes you feel better, you can tell people I asked.

Raylan: [about Boyd] Dickie, I didn't pull the trigger but I'll sleep like a baby knowing he will.

Raylan: Glen, I don't want you to speak anymore, 'cause once you start lying to me there's gonna be a river between us with no bridge to cross.

Season 3Edit

The Gun Fighter [3.01]Edit

Duffy: Raylan, I am so sorry. I would love to be of more help, but I gotta get back to watching women's tennis.

Raylan: [to Winona] As much as I appreciate you putting lipstick on this particular platypus, maybe we should start, I don't know, start looking for a house or something.

Boyd: Raylan, if a book could only be judged by its cover, you'd be a best seller.

Raylan: Boyd, I've been to Mexico, I don't think you'd like it.
Boyd: How so?
Raylan: There's a lot of Mexicans.

Cut Ties [3.02]Edit

Raylan: When did ya get married?
Goodall: Two months before I got divorced.

Harlan Roulette [3.03]Edit

Wade: We're old friends, aren't we?
Raylan: Friends? You strung me up, and left me for dead.
Wade: I thought that was water under the bridge.

Fogle: [about Raylan] You like old friends or something?
Wade: Well I set him up for Dickie Bennett, strung him up in a tree. I don't know, is that a friend?

JT: That's not how Russian Roulette works.
Fogle: You're not playing Russian Roulette dumb shit, you're playing Harlan Roulette.

Raylan: These boots aren't made for running.
Art: And yet chasing fugitives is a marshal's primary function.

Raylan: [after dropping a bullet on a helpless Duffy] Look here. Next one's comin' faster.

The Devil You Know [3.04]Edit

Boyd: [as Raylan arrives] ...the time is coming, but we don't have to put a pin in it for now since I am sensing a disturbance in the force.

Raylan: [while interrogating Lance] Let's see if I got this right. You managed to get bushwacked by an imbecile and an undernourished half-cripple?

Raylan: Shit. Well God damn if I don't have to save Dickie Bennett.

Raylan: You know what they say, getting old ain't for pussies.

Thick as Mud [3.05]Edit

Raylan: Have you been pissing?
Dewey: He took my kidneys, Raylan, not my dick.
Raylan: Your kidneys are for pissing. So why don't you try taking a leak, and if you can do it, then we know you still got your two kidneys.
Dewey: Come on, come on. [starts urinating] Holy shit. You mean I have four kidneys?

Raylan: Honey, if I started arresting people for committing adultery, I'd never make it home for supper.

Boyd: You are between a rock and a much, much harder rock.

Ava: You regret killing him?
Boyd: I regret that he made it necessary.

When The Guns Come Out [3.06]Edit

Raylan: [to Boyd Crowder] You want to run your hillbilly heroin fiefdom up here, that’s between you and the great state of Kentucky. I got no interest in shitkicker-on-shitkicker crime. But you will not drag me into this. The next time you set up an operation in this county or any other it better not have my God damn family name on the deed or so help me God, I will lose this star and the dance we do subsequent to that will not end with you finding Jesus in a hospital bed.

Winona: If you wanted to change your life for me Raylan, you would have done so by now.

Raylan: [to Boyd] So this is the new you, bartending and pushing pills? Moved on from swastikas and rocket launchers.

Arlo: Sneak up on a man like that; good way to get yourself shot.
Raylan: By you in your boxer shorts there? I think I got the drop on you this time, Arlo.

The Man Behind the Curtain [3.07]Edit

Raylan: I got mad ninja skills, buddy.
Tim: Yeah, you know karate?
Raylan: And two other Japanese words.

Tim: Shit blows up, that's my friend's ass.
Raylan: Shit's not gonna blow up.
Tim: And according to my friend, the surveillance team knows you're looking for him.
Raylan: How do they know that?
Tim: So I tell you where Sammy is, and you go all "Raylan" on him and drag him out of some restaurant by his nutsack.
Raylan: I'm not gonna grab his nutsack or any other part of him. I just want a word.

Raylan: Sammy, it's dress the part be the part, not dress the part hide behind your daddy.

Quarles: I'm just gonna put a smile on my face, and eat a nice plate of steaming shit...unsalted.

Bartender: What can I get ya?
Raylan: Some sleep.
Bartender: Can't get ya that. You could drink 'til you pass out.

Watching the Detectives [3.08]Edit

Raylan: [After being questioned in a murder case] That is bullshit, and you know it.
Art: Is it?
Raylan: Is that a real question?
Art: Well, it had a question mark.

Raylan: The S.S. Quarles is going under. You best swim like hell to get clear or the whirlpool will take you down with it.
Duffy: I believe they disproved that on MythBusters.

Raylan: [about dropping a bullet on Winn] I told him the next one might be coming a little faster.
Garrity: Deputy, that might just be the coolest thing I've ever laid ears on.

Loose Ends [3.09]Edit

Limehouse: You rather talk pig shit?
Raylan: Close... Robert Quarles.

Boyd: Well, Mr. Napier, I'd like to think that if I was behind an attempt on your life, at the very least I would've messed up your hair.

Raylan: [about Boyd] Still think you can change him, huh?
Ava: I'm not trying to change him. I'm trying to help him.

Guy Walks Into a Bar [3.10]Edit

Quarles: He slipped the hillbilly rug right out from under my feet.
Raylan: I'm just gonna file that under "Who gives a shit?"

Quarles: I'm gonna kill you, Raylan. Maybe not tonight, maybe not tomorrow, but some day you'll be walking down the street and I'm gonna put a bullet right in the back of your skull and you're gonna drop.

Measures [3.11]Edit

Raylan: Art, I've got a daddy.
Art: Yeah, I've met your daddy.
Raylan: Fair enough, continue.

Dickie Bennett: You know Mama always said you had the balls of a man about half your size.
Rodney Dunham: Out of respect for your late mother, I'm gonna let that one go.

Coalition [3.12]Edit

Raylan: You really think this is gonna go down?
Tom: I hope so, because if I'm missing my boy's tee ball game for nothing I'm gonna be pissed.

Boyd: Which one of you two ass holes is trying to set me up? Salt? Or Pepper?

Boyd: Are you sure you're alright with this?
Ava: $3.2 million. I might find a way to get right.

Limehouse: Now it's funny how that money bring together all them wayward personalities.

Slaughterhouse [3.13]Edit

Art: [to Boyd] You're not as dumb as you look. I like the use of the word cahoots, though.

Raylan: [about Limehouse] A horsefly sneezes in these hills, he knows about it beforehand, but I'm to believe the car bomb and the dead trooper down the road comes as news.

Boyd: Well I guess we best both sleep with one eye open.
Limehouse: I always do.

Raylan: [about Quarles, who lost his arm] You know what they're saying at the office? I dis-armed him.
Winona: That's pretty good.

Season 4Edit

Hole in the Wall [4.01]Edit

Boyd: No one ever said runnin' a criminal enterprise was gonna be this hard.
Ava: They left that part out on career day.

Raylan: [to Jody, a criminal] You ever heard of the expression: "You run into an asshole in the morning, you run into an asshole in the morning. You run into assholes all day; you're the asshole."

Jody: Shoot him.
Raylan: Jesus girl, you just showed me your tits 45 minutes ago.

Jody: You think this is the first time I had a gun pointed at me?
Raylan: No...could be your last though.

Where's Waldo? [4.02]Edit

Art: You came here about the job, right? You need to hear about this. I got a young kid here, decorated sniper in Iraq War, Army Ranger, I don't know how many kills he had. Always lookin' to kill somebody else. Probably got PTSD. Probably an alcoholic. Not a matter if that powder keg is gonna blow but when. I got a lady marshall here. Brought in two of the top fifteen fugitives to this office, but she's always tryin' to prove herself. I thought she was gonna be the one that would take this office over when I got ready to retire, but now she's left her husband so it's gonna be fun to monitor her emotional state over the next year, see if she can keep it together. Then I got a local boy, born in Harlan county, been investigated so many times internal affairs has got him on speed dial. Father's in prison for murderin' two people, including a state trooper, and his daddy killed somebody else last night in prison and I get to be the one to tell him about it!

Raylan: I'm sorry what are we talkin' about?
Art: Where were you yesterday?
Raylan: Why? Did somethin' happen?
Art: No.
Raylan: So, what's the problem?
Art: You're keeping addict hours, you come in late, you leave early, you're haggard. It's like the baby's already been born.
Raylan: I don't know what you're talkin' about.
Art: Tim?
Tim: I'd rather not take sides.
Raylan: Thank you.
Art: Well would you rather do morning prisoner transports for the next six months?
Tim: You do seem a little tired.
Art: No shit! The question is why?
Tim: Smart money in the office pool's on exotic dancin'.

Boyd: Wynn Duffy! Why, Duffy's people meet my people. My people meet Wynn Duffy's people.

Boyd: Well you can trust me.
Duffy: But I don't even trust the way you just now said I could trust you.

Art: That mystery bag thing is giving me a bit of a Marshal stiffy.

Truth and Consequences [4.03]Edit

Guy: You don't worry about how long you're gonna live. You worry about how slow you're gonna die.

Art: [to Raylan] Admit it. You're getting a little bit of a marshal stiffy yourself.

Art: If my stiffy lasts much longer I'm going to have to consult my physician. What's your opinion?
Raylan: On your stiffy? I don't have one.

Randall: [to Raylan] So how about at six o'clock this p.m. I put a little limp in that Gary Cooper walk.

Cassie: I'm not afraid of you.
Boyd: Well in that case ma'am, I think we've misjudged each other.

The Bird Has Flown [4.04]Edit

Lindsey: How's that song go? Look for the rainbow in every storm?
Raylan: I'll have to download that.

Rachel: Are you going to tell me how much money it was or not?
Raylan: I did...it's a goodly sum.

Guy: Any fool that didn't see that grifter Barbie coming a mile off deserves getting his ass fleeced.

Kin [4.05]Edit

Boyd: Whole world's a tree Raylan. I'm just a squirrel trying to get a nut.

Foot Chase [4.06]Edit

Boyd: Son you are turning a corner that you can't walk back around.
Shelby: Well that's like warning a man it's gonna rain when he's already wet.

Cop: Waste of time if you ask me.
Raylan: What is, doing your job?

Money Trap [4.07]Edit

Outlaw [4.08]Edit

Boyd: [being led from the back room of the bar, in handcuffs] Raylan Givens! If you were coming down here anyway why have Shelby drag me in again?
Raylan: I didn't have him drag you in the first time. [indicates the officer leading Boyd] What's going on?
Officer: What's it look like?
Raylan: Did Shelby send you?
Officer: He's the boss, isn't he?
Raylan: I just saw him not fifteen minutes ago, he didn't mention anything.
Officer: Maybe he figured it wasn't any of your concern.
Raylan: Well except I told him I was coming here. I'm sorry, we haven't met; I'm deputy US Marshal Raylan Givens.
Officer: Well, all due respect—
Raylan: 'K, just, hold up. [to Ava] Is that an engagement ring?
Ava: Mm-hmm.
Boyd: 'S a big rock, ain't it? Now as acrimonious as our relationship has been lately, Raylan, Ava and I discussed it and you still gon' be on the guest list.
Raylan: [to Ava] You know the definition of crazy, right? [Ava shakes her head] Keep doing the same thing over and over and expecting it to come out different. [Ava chuckles]
Officer: Sir, I'm gonna need you to step aside.
Raylan: Okay, maybe I'm crazy, or I'm just having a hell of a day: did you just give me an order?
Officer: You don't move, I'm gonna shoot you.
[Both draw, Raylan shoots the officer, Ava and Boyd yell in surprise]
Raylan: [calmly] Jesus, I hope I got that right.

Boyd: I am the outlaw, and this is my world, and my world has a high cost of living.

The Hatchet Tour [4.09]Edit

Art: [to Raylan] I want you to sit down and get use to purging case files until I figure out how to like you again!

Boyd: Well cousin Johnny, Ava and I have been trying to put together a puzzle and it seems you have some of the missing pieces. Why don't you start from the beginning?

Hunter: Raylan, you listen to what your mama taught you and not that old son-of-bitch you may turn out all right. But I wouldn't count on it, 'cause we both know whose voice it is that makes you do what you do.

Get Drew [4.10]Edit

Art: First thing we're gonna do is we're gonna acknowledge that this guy is awesome.
Rachel: What?
Art: I mean, he shoots Theo Tonin, fakes his own death in spectacular fashion, pushes a guy out of an airplane while he's flying it, parachutes into Harlan county with enough coke and cash to jumpstart the economy of small country, and then he has the balls to get a job in law enforcement, not once, but two times! He spends a couple days riding around with you while you're looking for him, and now he's run off with a hooker half his age. That's some badass shit.
Raylan: It's pretty badass.

Boyd: [to Raylan] You shoulda been on the other side, with me and your daddy. You'd still be able to shoot people, and be an asshole...your two favorite activities.

Decoy [4.11]Edit

Nick: Look at you, Mr. Crowder. You're a well dressed man, you got a sense of style, you got your shirt buttoned all the way up to the top. I gotta ask where'd you get all those teeth?
Boyd: Courtesy of the American taxpayer while serving our great nation in Desert Storm.
Nick: Man, I love the way you talk, using forty words when four will do. I'm curious. What would you say if I was about to put forty bullets through that beautiful vest of yours?

Art: [Tim slams on the breaks] What the hell?! What are you doing?
Tim: It's not right.
Art: What's not right?
Tim: One abandoned car beside the road's no big deal, but two so close together that's weird.
Art: That's Kentucky.
Tim: How bout a third? [points to another up the road]
Art: What are you thinking? IEDs?
Tim: I'm not thinking confetti cans.
Art: Are you sure about this?
Tim: For all I know I'm just having a full blown PTSD episode.
Art: You get those a lot?
Tim: Only when I'm handling firearms in public.

Tim: [calling Colt realizing he's put IEDs in cars to ambush his team] Am I right in saying that you were in the sandbox before Afghanistan?
Colt: I am a double winner. Is that why you called, to ask me that?
Tim: Oh, why? You busy?
Colt: I am in the middle of something.
Tim: All right, I'll make it quick. I'm writing a book set in Iraq. There's a chapter where a convey of military police is transporting a criminal, and Lieutenant Dan, he's our main guy, he gets a bad feeling—
Colt: Forrest Gump.
Tim: Huh?
Colt: There's a Lieutenant Dan in Forrest Gump.
Tim: Oh shit, you're right. I'll change it. Lieutenant Colt.
Colt: I would like a young Gérard Depardieu to play me in the movie. I'm honored.
Tim: Well you should be, he's a big guy, a real badass, or he was, he's kind of losing his grip when we meet him, he's lost someone, he's started using dope that he confiscated.
Colt: Yeah but then we find out he's kicked again, and anyone who thinks he's in anyway diminished is in for a big surprise.
Tim: Yeah, but he's the kind of character might say he's kicked but we all know he's just one broken shoelace away from sayin' "screw it" and picking up again.
Colt: How about you have him go into a bar and pick a fight with some rangers and he send a couple of them to the hospital?
Tim: It's not a fantasy. Anyway, he gets a bad feeling when they pass an abandoned vehicle, sees a second and a third, so he's thinking IEDs triggered by cell. You ever come across anything like that?
Colt: Me, personally? No. But I did hear about this one convoy, couple of Frankensteins and a gun truck on highway 10. So, the spotter, he calls a halt between the first two cars thinking the Hajis will blow the second if it moves forward, and the first if it tries to go back.
Tim: Well, how'd they get out of it?
Colt: Yeah, they didn't. Because they were too afraid to move, they just sat there in their vehicles, pssing and shitting in their helmets, too afraid to toss it out the windows on account of possible snipers. Then they ran out of food. They started eating each other till there was only one left, and he blew his brains out. Do you want to know the sad part?
Tim: Oh, there's a sad part?
Colt: Yeah. Because they were so afraid to move, they never found out whether or not the cars had explosives. So basically, they all died from being pussies.

Art: [Tim is filling a bottle with gas to blown up a car] Molotov cocktail, huh. Haven't seen one of those since that Guns N Roses concert in 1989.

Tim: [after making a Molotov cocktail to throw at a car] I work hard and not one lighter that isn't being used to charge a goddamn cell phone and none of you smoke.
Art: [to other agents] None of you smoke? This is Kentucky not Sausalito, what's wrong with you people?

Peace of Mind [4.12]Edit

Boyd: I believe you dictate the river of fate through your own actions.

Raylan: Did you not wake up this morning thinking this was another opportunity to mess up some bad guy's day? I did.

Ellstin Limehouse: Now, you think that little 'ol star on your chest and that gun in your holster allows you to say whatever the hell you want up in my holler, but you a damn fool, Shelby.

Winona: [wanting Raylan to sign paperwork for their baby] It's kind of important that you get it done before she's born.
Raylan: Yes. Listen, it's gonna be the first thing I do— What did you just say? [the office breaks out in applause]
Winona: We're having a girl, Raylan. I found out this morning.
Raylan: A girl. Holy shit. Hold on. [office continues to clap for him] Thank you. I'm on the phone. Seriously. [back to Winona] Winona, I don't know shit about girls.
Winona: That is so sweet, sayin' it like I don't already know.

Art: What's the matter with you, Raylan? Not used to positive attention?
Raylan: No, I loved that. Can we continue?
Tim: No, the moment's gone.

Boyd: [to Ava] I keep thinkin' about what's most important, in this moment, and, uh, with everything twirlin', and, uh, I keep comin' back to you. Your safety. Your freedom.

Ghosts [4.13]Edit

Raylan: That guy you shot... You good?
Tim: He called it.
Raylan: Well, if you need someone to talk to...
Tim: [in chorus with Givens] I got Rachel.
Raylan: You got Rachel.

Boyd: Shhhh! Don't you know what we're doing is illegal?

Boyd: I count four to one. That hardly seems fair.
Raylan: Which way do you mean?

Season 5Edit

A Murder of Crowes [5.01]Edit

Raylan: The next one's comin' faster.

The Kids Aren't All Right [5.02]Edit

Raylan: You get in the weed business with teenagers, and it's their fault when things go wrong? You the type of fella who walks under a flock of birds, and is surprised when he ends up with shit on his face?

Good Intentions [5.03]Edit

Messer: There's a lot of expense in taking care of whores.

Over the Mountain [5.04]Edit

Shot All to Hell [5.05]Edit

Boyd: People of Harlan County, rich and poor, will marvel at your debasement and venality. They will spit venom when they speak your name. And they will take your suicide as the last pact of a coward. Now your reputation is ruined, your good word worthless, but death will not be the end of your suffering. For generations your children, and your children's children will have a mark against their name, and that will be your legacy.

Boyd: I've been accused of being a lot of things, inarticulate ain't one of them.

Weight [5.10]Edit

Dickie: Alright, Raylan, alright, you win. You wanna find Dewey here's what you do. First of all go to a gas'n'go or whatever and get yourself a map of Kentucky. Follow route 9 southbound with your finger, follow it way way down until you're pointing right at... your asshole, and then what you gonna do is you're gonna take your hand and just go ahead and cram it right up inside. You gotta make sure, Raylan, that you do it in a way so that the rest of you just keeps on following your hand right up your ass, right up inside all that shit you're so full of, Raylan. And then what you gonna do is you're just gonna [whistles] wink out of existence forever.
Raylan: Proud of that one, aren't you?
Dickie: ...It'll do.

CastEdit

External linksEdit

Wikipedia
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Last modified on 22 April 2014, at 05:19