The Unit(Redirected from Unit, The)
First Responders [1.1]Edit
- Jonas: You been training for this moment your entire life. The universe has been conspiring, if you think about it, to put you right here, right now. Off you go, we're all waitin' on ya.
- Molly Blane: [to Kim, who has packed her car to leave the base] You say you love him. Now are you brave enough to act on it? Here you are, a pretty little girl - fine daughter - a child on the way, a man in combat. You're frightened, and you want him home. This is not your own special circumstance. You know what this is? It is the history of the world. You want to think about that for a moment.
- Kim: Army regulations state...
- Molly: You aren't in the Army. You're in the Unit.
- Jonas: This is my house, here, which means that's your house, there.
- Bob: I don't even have a key.
- Jonas: Well, there's not much crime in this neighborhood.
- Bob: My waffle shirt...
- Kim: It's coming.
- Bob: You sent it on the truck.
- Kim: Most of the things we shipped.
- (Bob turns away in disgust)
- Kim: I gave you one child, I'm carrying another - presumably yours - so don't take that attitude!
- Molly: "Is my husband happy in his work?" Well, you know the problem is stress, but the stress is mine. (Dr. Willey hands Molly a photograph)
- Molly: What we have here - this a photograph of a broken mirror.
- Dr. Willey: And you're saying that some stressed out person fired those two shots into the mirror.
- Molly: Yes, I did.
- Dr. Willey: You fired those shots.
- Molly: Yes I did.
- Dr. Willey: At a rat.
- Molly: At a rat, yes.
- Dr. Willey: And you missed the rat, but you grouped two shots - .45 pistol, two shot group, both in the kill zone, with your husband's pistol.
- Molly: My husband's pistol, yes.
- Brown: Did you indicate, sir, that i'm entitled to the services of an attorney?
- FBI Agent Griffiths: Do you have something to conceal Sgt.?
- Brown: I do not.
- FBI Agent Griffiths: Then why would you wish an attorney?
- Brown: Are you an attorney, sir?
- FBI Agent Griffiths: Just answer my questions.
- Indonesian Farmer: There are those things that cannot be fixed with a sunny disposition.
- Colonel Ryan: Well, to the bad guys it's chaos, but to us it's a precision assault by perfect shooters.
- (Brown tells the team he's sorry for making them miss their mission)
- Mac: "Sorry" is what you tell your girlfriend when you finish too early.
True Believers [1.4]Edit
- Susan: I have a job to do.
- Jonas: I want you to postpone it.
- Susan: Why should I?
- Jonas: [Takes a card from his pocket and writes his number down] Take this card. Hold on to it.
- Susan: What is that?
- Jonas: No matter how blessed our lives, how charmed our existence, things still, inevitably, irrevocably, go wrong. Your mother is swindled out of her savings. Your estranged husband runs off with your kids. Your best friend goes on vacation in a foreign land and disappears. Eventually, bad things find us all. You ever hear of the Get-Out-Of-Jail-Free card? This is a Get-Out-of-Hell card. At some point in your life, God forbid, you have no where else to turn, call that number. That is why you are going to postpone your job.
- Susan: Two hours.
Non-Permissive Environment [1.5]Edit
- (Molly starts pulling plates out of the cupboard and pauses)
- Molly: How many, ya think?
- Jonas: She bring laundry?
- Molly: Mm-hmm...
- Jonas: Set for three.
- (in the kitchen, getting ready for dinner)
- Molly: You gonna talk to her?
- Jonas: Said she'd talk to me. I imagine that's what she'll do.
- Molly: And you'll "daddy" her up, but you won't put it to her.
- Jonas': Don't tell me what I'm gonna do.
- Molly: Then show me what you're gonna do.
- Jonas: Be careful... Even the dumbest of generals wouldn't start a two-front war.
- Bob: (pointing to a picture of the target) He reminds me of someone.
- Jonas: Does he.
- Bob: My wife's grandad, maybe. What does that make him, my grandfather-in-law?
- Jonas: Did grandfather-in-law ever bomb a busload of schoolchildren?
- Bob: Not that I know of.
- Jonas: That's one big difference, then.
- (Jonas declines an offer of a cigar)
- Iranian Security Agent: What's permitted to others is not permitted to you.
- Jonas: The injunction of the Roman Legionnaire.
- Iranian Security Agent: Ah! I see I've found a fellow scholar.
- Jonas: No, just another old soldier.
- Iranian Security Agent: Well it's better than civilian life.
- Jonas: As what is not?
- Jonas: And what precaution have we ever found unnecessary?
- Iranian Security Agent: Which is why we two old soldiers may be fated to die in bed
- Jonas: Now wouldn't that be a hell of a thing.
- Iranian Security Agent:(talking to Jonas) Goodbye my friend. I trust we kept you occupied. It was hard to distract an old warrior, but I succeeded. I enjoyed our time together. Sometimes you win. Sometimes you lose.
- Kilo Six Alpha: Radio check, over.
- Jonas: You're coming in broken and stupid.
- Jonas: I would appreciate it, if in front of our friends (gesturing to Bob and Kim) you will tell me why you doubt my word? I mean, am I known as a man of my word?
- Molly: Not when it comes to housework.
- Jonas: Seeking glory was Napoleon's downfall.
- Sgt. Coots: And those claim not to, lie.
- Bob: (putting the lucky charm away) Just trying to keep the missus happy.
- Jonas: Keep your team happy. Next time I see you packing crap instead of ammunition I'll strip you naked and start from stratch.
Eating the Young [1.9]Edit
- (Kim lands a job at a radio station)
- Radio Host: (Notices a gun in Kim's purse) You have a gun.
- Kim: You want to reconsider that advance? Bob got me a permit for it.
- Radio Host: Is it loaded?
- Kim: Well it's silly to carry it otherwise. Offends your sensibilities?
- Radio Host: I don't believe in them, I'm more the poetic type.
- Kim: You don't find a pistol poetic? You ever heard of "Poetic Justice"?
- Secretary of State: (to Bob) Daniel, you just screwed yourself out of a military career. We will go forward as planned; you will get me to this meeting and once we get back to the plane, I will see to your dishonorable discharge; personally
- Jonas: advice to cancel a Government meeting is ignored)
- Kayla: Why would-
- Jonas: The Secretary of State ignore our advice? Well okay, because A: to skip this meeting would threaten a fledgling democracy in Africa, and would weaken our position in the region.
- Kayla': And B?
- Jonas: Because the man fancies himself a cowboy.
- (After finding Bob at the widow's house)
- Bob: Kim!
- Kim: A block from here, our daughter is sleeping, trusting in her bed.
- Bob: Kim...
- Kim: Stay away from me.
- (After learning that the money was swindled)
- Kim: You lost all our money?
- Molly: I'm taking it on myself. I'm paying you all back.
Morale, Welfare and Recreation [1.12]Edit
- Agent Bluman: You just lied to the Governor of Georgia.
- Jonas Blane: Now is that a sin, or just a crime?
The Wall [1.13]Edit
- Jonas 'Snake Doctor' Blane: [Jonas has discovered the missing money in their account] How do I earn my money? I do not make cornflakes for a living. I earn my money at the risk of my life out there, letting the scum of the earth shoot at me. You *know* that's how I make my living. That's why my bosses pay me... and you wish it away.
- Bob Brown: When you see Indians, be careful. When you don't see any Indians, be twice as careful.
Change of Station [2.1]Edit
- Mack: (while putting his medals back on his uniform) A man won't sell you his life, but he'll trade it to you for a little piece of ribbon.
- Kim: (smiling) How do you walk with all that trash on your chest?
- Mack: I don't know, I ain't done it in years.
- Mack: When you're in you're a guest, when you're out you're a pest.
Extreme Rendition [2.2]Edit
- Jonas: (to Molly about working for Blackthorn) You do what you have to but I ain't going to be your cheering squad.
The Kill Zone [2.3]Edit
- (A trainee misses the blue chicken he was aiming for in shooting practice.)
- Bob: The Nazis got your mom.
- Trainee: (nodding head) Do it like my life depended on it.
- Bob: No, I want you to do it like my life depended on it. As one day indeed it may.
- (Bob Brown stands up and shoots the blue chicken the trainee was aiming for.)
- (Jonas shoots the enemy leader)
- Jonas: Yeah, I bet that hurt.
- Annette: (To Bob) I was with Billy four years, I know what you do, how you do it. Can you get my kids back? Huh? Can you give me some rough justice?
- Brown: As it says in the Bible. ' Harm no chicken but thine own.'
- Jonas: We've got gophers! Let's flush them out.
- Jonas: Cargo intact? The FBI gonna wanna talk to him.
- Mack: He's intact, he's awful quiet.
- Jonas: Just lost his girl and his hobby in the space of an hour, he's had a rough day.
Force Majeure [2.5]Edit
- (to Vince, who he is trying to rescue from drowning)
- Bob: Just my luck...you're a marine.
- (After finding a group of seniors abandoned in the hospital)
- Bob: Snake doctor, we have a problem.
Old Home Week [2.6]Edit
- (at the protest lecture)
- Tiffy: Somebody thinks I offended him, I suppose he can give me a call. He comes into my house in the middle of the night with a butcher knife, I'm gonna shoot him dead because I have a family to defend. Is this so foreign to your way of thinking?
- Christine: The bible says "Thou shalt not kill."
- Tiffy: Yeah, well I guess our opponents missed that part.
- Kim: (looking at the jeep to be restored) Well?
- Parker: Restored, street legal, showroom fresh. Any man Jack in this man's army would fight to pay ten grand to take it home and call it Muffy.
- Parker: What the hell do you think you're doing?!
- Private: (standing quickly to attention) Taking a break, Sergeant!
- Parker: The hell you are! You will take a break when you are discharged from this service, killed in action or I say so, whichever comes first!
Off the Meter [2.7]Edit
- Bob: I'd rather have a sister in a whorehouse than a brother in the Navy.
- Charlotte: (to Kim) Do you expect me to, in effect, explain myself to you?
- Bob: (laughing) Ryan asks what your wife would say if she knew. And Top said, "Well, sir, I'd tell her, 'Woman, now that's getting into my personal life. And you know how I like to keep my personal life separate from my married life.'"
- Jonas: Repeat the lesson back to me.
- Brown: Best way to get yourself out of a jam: confess to something illegal, immoral, or embarrassing.
- Jonas: You're a quick study.
Natural Selection [2.8]Edit
- Jonas: Wait. Blue 6, what were today's instructions?
- Bob/Blue 6: Formation 0600 hours. Uniform, (huffs) boots, fatigues, 40-pound ruck sack. :meals: one MRE.
- Jonas: Stop. Repeat that last instruction.
- Bob/Blue 6: (After brief pause)
- Meals: one MRE.
- Jonas: You think that meant one MRE for the entire day, that we're trying to starve you?
- Bob/Blue 6: Yes, Sergeant Major.
- Jonas: (looks at Red 2) Red 2. Have you understood the instructions?
- Red 2: Yes, Sergeant Major.
- Jonas: Would you explain them to the other candidate?
- Red 2: One MRE for each meal – breakfast, lunch and dinner. That's three. (grins)
- Jonas: Well, you're wrong, Red 2 and you're out. Blue 6, you may proceed. (blows whistle)
- Bob: So, I just passed Selection?
- Jonas: You have now. (brief pause) Welcome to the Unit.
- Ilona: Why did this happen?
- Bob: Y is a crooked letter; nobody ever got it straight.
Report by Exception [2.9]Edit
- Congressman Gelber: I'd like some answers.
- Ryan: Sir, my job and the job of my men is to protect and to defend the interests of this country, as determined by the executive branch. It is not my job to make nor to influence policy. If you disagree with specific mission objectives, I strongly suggest you address your concerns to someone higher in the chain of command.
- Congressman Gelber: So what you're saying is you're just gonna sit there all afternoon and stonewall.
- Ryan: Frankly, sir, yes sir, I am, sir.
- Neil: Oh, now don't pull that crap with me. I did three terms on the House Sub-Committee for Military Affairs.
- Ryan: Congressman Reynolds, right? Middle of Texas, wasn't it? 11th District?
- Krinsman: That is correct.
- Ryan: Any oil in those parts?
- Neil: What's that supposed to mean?
- Ryan: Let's just say I like to know who I work for.
- Ryan: Do I abort the mission?
- Neil: Let's not pretend here. You and I both know how this works. We manage up. Our job is to protect the people we work for.
- Ryan: And here I thought our job was to protect the country.
- Jonas: Is that the real guy?
- Mack: What?
- Jonas: The real Zjhokar?
- Mack: Real as rain.
- Jonas: The man was Bin Laden fifteen years ago. What are you doing handing him back?
- Mack: It's what the other side wanted for Christmas.
- Jonas: The State Department know about this?
- Brown: No, but the Air Force does.
- Mack: Left them a present.
- (They watch as a missile takes out the terrorists' jeep)
- Jonas: He didn't believe in Christmas anyway.
- Commander Shelov: Why did Georgian forces and your American government work together? Perhaps you tell me.
- Jonas: Friend, I'm no policy-maker. I'm a soldier sent here to look for terrorists. (looks up at Shelov) Seen any? [Shelov tasers Jonas]
- Ryan: (to Krinsman) I've got my friends, sir. I am perfectly content to have you as an enemy.
Silver Star [2.11]Edit
- Jonas: I said you had two apologies to make. What are they?
- Darryl: I have to apologize to my wife.
- Jonas: And?... And, son?
- Darryl: I have to apologize to God.
The Broom Cupboard [2.12]Edit
- Jonas: Just make sure the senator stays in her hotel.
- Bob: I will use all my powers of persuasion. If that doesn't work, I'll hit her in the head.
- President: (Referring to General Raja) And the man, how did you find him?
- Jonas: Smart, charismatic, a leader.
- President: But?!
- Jonas: I wouldn't go hunting with him, sir.
- President: I have to thank you for exceeding my expectations.
- Jonas: How's that, sir?
- President: The Senator's kidnapping. You gave me a pretext. To either support the coup or if I sit out, it's already made the government there a whole lot more obedient.
- Jonas: Just trying to keep the fine Senator out of harm's way.
- President: Well, well done.
- General Raja: Tell me, Mr. Green. What will you report to your President?
- Jonas: That you are an impeccable host.
- Jonas: On your list of requests, I don't see election officials or ballot boxes.
- General Raja: The most suitable aid would be M4 machine guns and C-130 transport planes.
- Raja's Aide: Which you can secure through your Anti-Terrorist Activities Fund.
- General Raja: Security first, then elections.
Sub Conscious [2.13]Edit
- Tiffy: Either you're getting too much sex or not enough.
- Kim: Only in my dreams.
- Tiffy: Where was your husband last night, as you were dreaming of our husbands?
- Kim: Not in my bed, all night at the office.
- Colonel Ryan: (to Bob) Your daughter just sold you out.