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Under Siege

1992 film by Andrew Davis

Under Siege is a 1992 film starring Steven Seagal, Tommy Lee Jones, Gary Busey, and Erika Eleniak. In the movie Navy SEAL, Casey Ryback (Steven Seagal) must stop a group of terrorists led ex-CIA agent William Stranix (Tommy Lee Jones) and executive officer Commander Krill (Gary Busey) that have taken over the battleship USS Missouri and plan to use its weapons for terrorism.

Casey Ryback

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  • Regarding Private Nash's inexperience and inability to listen to reason Fucking E-1 prick After being detained in the freezer Another cold day in Hell.
  • I'm just a cook.
  • Yeah, well, I also cook.
  • Next thing I know, you'll be dating musicians.
  • All your ridiculous, pitiful antics won't change a thing. You and I, we're the same, we're puppets in the same sick play. We serve the same master, he's a lunatic, he's ungrateful and there's nothing we can do about it. You and I are the same.
  • Keep the faith, Stranix.
  • Come on, that's not striking an officer. [punches Krill in the face] That's striking an officer. [begins to fight Marines]

William Stranix

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  • Don't worry about a thing, baby. You could play this gig with your eyes shut.
  • (singing) And there she is. Miss July 1989. Wait a minute. Wait a minute. No, no, no. That's not Miss July.
  • Let this be a learning experience. If you resist, we will kill you and the man next to you. Now move out of here in an orderly fashion. Now!
  • [After taking control of the Missouri] Four minutes ahead of schedule. Damn, I'm good.
  • Doumer, Doumer, Doumer. Why didn't you hire this person? I don't know what his price would have been, but it would have been WORTH it.
  • Daffy... Porky Pig... Little red fucker with a mustache... (Yosemite Sam)
  • All of my life. Saturday morning cartoons. The best. For example, remember those two little shrimps coming in, riding seahorses, little chaps, little pistols? Bang! Bang! Bang! Shooting over their shoulders. Rescue that lobster from the Swedish cook. Funniest thing I ever saw in my life! Splendid work, by the way.
  • (pressing the buttons to launch a Tomahawk missile) This little piggy goes to the market. This little piggy stay at home. This little piggy... Oh, mama. Oh, mama. We... We... We... WEEEEEEEE!! All the way home! (air guitars the Star-Spangled Banner as the missile launches, then settles into the captain's chair with a long sigh) Happy trails.

Commander Krill

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  • [spitting at Ryback's soup] Add a little flavor.
  • Then you don't know about Ryback? He is an extreme psychopath. He hates officers. He hates America. This is the captain's birthday. I don't want him ruining it. No one speaks to him or lets him out. If he tries to escape, shoot him right here. I'm counting on you.
  • (dressed as a woman) I'm your date tonight, Captain.
  • "Commander Krill has become increasingly hostile to the crew possibly due to anger over reviews of his performance. I recommend that he'll be given a psychological evaluation before taking over HIS NEXT ASSIGNMENT!!" Do I look like I need a psychological evaluation?!
  • [after Ryback punches him in the face] Now I know why you're a cook. Because you hit like a faggot.

Dialogues

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Commander Krill [in drag looking like a frumpy old woman]: Listen to the shit I have to put up with: "In the past few weeks, Commander Krill has become increasingly hostile to the crew, possibly due to anger over reviews of his performance. I recommend that he'll be given a psychological evaluation before taking over his next assignment!" Do I look like I need a psychological evaluation?
William Stranix {deadpan tone}: Not at all.
[Krill yanks off wig]
Commander Krill: I got to change.
William Stranix: The disk, Mr. Pitt. Guard it with your life.
Mr. Pitt: Of course.
William Stranix: Anything else you forgot to tell us about? Any other little memory losses or oversights, perhaps?
Commander Krill: No other little memory losses or oversights perhaps. There's two men, one of them's locked up. And I'll take care of him...
William Stranix: No, no, no. We'll handle it. Secure the galley. Send Cates, send Ziggs.
Shadow: You got it.
Commander Krill: This Marine's armed, Bill. I think we should send more, I'll go...
William Stranix: Don't worry about it. These guys are professionals. They can handle twenty Marines, and a hundred cooks.
William Stranix: Hear this, gentlemen: if any ships or aircraft approach within 100 miles, we will kill the crew and retaliate with everything in the ship's arsenal.
Tom Breaker: Bill, this is Tom. What's going on?
William Stranix: Hi, Tom! You know what's going on. I have 32 Tomahawks under my thumb, and the only think you can do about it is alert the media.
Tom Breaker: You don't have the launch codes.
William Stranix: Oh, uh, let me take a wild guess... (Pitt points to a monitor) Uh, 5-6-6-0-4-9, uh... 9-7-8-0?
(An aide hands a printout to Admiral Bates, confirming the codes.)
Tom Breaker: This is insane.
William Stranix: Oh, be careful with that word, Tom, please!
Tweety Bird: Any sign of Wile E. Coyote?
William Stranix: No. Meet at the bird cage as planned, Roadrunner, out!
Commander Krill: You're the roadrunner?
William Stranix: Yeah, never been caught. Mee-meep.
William Stranix: (Checking Cates' corpse) The man that did this is a professional. Who is he, and what's he doing running around on my battleship, Mr. Krill?
Commander Krill: Your battleship? You wouldn't be on this battleship if it wasn't for me. He's a cook, plain and simple...
William Stranix: This is not the work of a cook.
Commander Krill: He came on board with the captain. I know his routine, front and back. He's good with cooking knives...
(Stranix rips the throwing knife out of Cates's jugular and holds it up to Krill's face)
William Stranix: Cooking knives? (angrily slams the throwing knife on the counter)
Commander Krill: He got lucky. In my professional opinion, he is a military reject in command of a GALLEY...!
(hearing a beep, they turn and see Ryback's homemade bomb in the microwave)
Doumer: GET DOWN!
(Ryback's bomb explodes. One of Stranix's men is killed in the bast)
Commander Krill: What was that?
William Stranix: That was a bomb, jackass. He used the microwave as a detonator.
[Krill found Ryback's personnel file]
Commander Krill: Ryback's file wasn't in Personnel. It was in the Captain's private cabinet. Ryback is an ex-SEAL.
Doumer: The Goddamn cook's a SEAL?
Commander Krill: Shut up and listen. "Expert in Martial Arts, Explosives, Weapons and Tactics. Silver Star, Navy Cross, Purple Heart with Cluster, and Security Clearance revoked after Panama." That means he couldn't hold any rating except that of a yeoman...or a cook. How little did I know?
Shadow: We just lost two more men in the Engine Room!
William Strannix: You were told to review the personnel file on every individual on this ship.
Commander Krill: I know what I was told, but I didn't have access to the Captain's files at that TIME!
Jordan Tate: You're not a cook.
Casey Ryback: Yeah, well, I also cook.
(Jordan answers the SEAL satellite phone in the middle of Ryback's gunfight)
Jordan Tate: Hello?
Admiral Bates: Who in the hell is this?
Jordan Tate: Who in the hell is this?
Admiral Bates: This is Admiral Bates speaking. I'm trying to get a hold of Chief Ryback, is he about?
Jordan Tate: He's in a gunfight right now, I'll have to take a message.
Secretary of Defense Trenton: What the hell's going on over there?!
(Jordan jumps up and runs after Ryback)
Jordan Tate: Bullshit, I'm not staying here!
Tackman: Where're you going?!
Granger: Tackman, what'd you say to her?!
Tackman: Case, she's coming up behind you!
Ryback: What are you doing?
Jordan Tate: The safest place on this ship is right behind you!
Mr. Pitt: Whatever they did, they're smarter than I am. Everything's dead. It's hopeless.
William Stranix: Nothing is hopeless. (puts his gun into Pitt's eye socket) Take heart.
Mr. Pitt: Just give me a little more time, I'll figure it out.
William Stranix: I like your attitude. Excellent.
William Stranix: All of my life. Saturday morning cartoons. The best. For example, remember those two little shrimps coming in, riding seahorses, little chaps, little pistols? Bang! Bang! Bang! Shooting over their shoulders. Rescue that lobster from the Swedish cook. Funniest thing I ever saw in my life! Splendid work, by the way.
Shadow: Stranix...
William Stranix: Splendid work. My, my, my, how hell doth quicken the spirit. Tomahawks!
Mr. Pitt: They're up and ready.
William Stranix: Where?
Mr. Pitt: The fire control.
William Stranix: Of course, the fire control. Chips and dips on the weather deck. Don't be late. Motor launch is waiting! All hands! Clear out of here!
Shadow: Let's go. Stranix, four minutes.
Mr. Pitt: Meet us at the motor launch.
William Stranix: I'll take that weapon. Quietly. Now!
(William Stranix grabs Casey Ryback's gun and tosses it.)
Casey Ryback: You look familiar. I know you, don't I?
William Stranix: I think you do. Been a long time.
Casey Ryback: Yes, sir. It has.
William Stranix: Turn around. We'll have a tour. Step forward. Here we have our Tomahawks speeding their way to the sunny Aloha State. Turn around. As you can see, there will be no return. I got the key. The lock is broken. Step forward. Have a sit over there. You'll watch the end of the world on TV, my man. Put your feet up. Relax. You know, you're good. You are really good. It's a shame to kill you. Behold my finest work.
Casey Ryback: Do me a favor. Tell me something. You really think blowing up a bunch of innocent people will change anything? What made you flip like this?
William Stranix: I got tired of coming up with last-minute desperate solutions to impossible problems created by other fucking people.
Casey Ryback: All your ridiculous, pitiful antics won't change a thing. You and I, we're puppets in the same sick play. We serve the same master and he's an ungrateful lunatic. There's nothing we can do about it. You and I are the same.
William Stranix: Oh, no. No. No. No. There's a difference, my man. You have faith. I don't!
Tom Breaker: Look, Bill, I know things are a little chaotic for you right now.
William Stranix: Chaotic? Wake up, Tom! You know, and I know, that chaos and bedlam are consuming the entire world! UV light waves are only the beginning, Tom. We have an inch of topsoil left.
Tom Breaker: Topsoil?
William Stranix: Sexually transmitted diseases, deforestation, irreversibly progressive depletion of the global gene pool. It all adds up to oblivion, pal. Governments will fall, anarchies will reign. It's a brave new world.

Cast

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