The Mirror Has Two Faces

1996 film by Barbra Streisand

The Mirror Has Two Faces is a 1996 American romantic dramedy film produced and directed by Barbra Streisand, who also stars. The screenplay by Richard LaGravenese is based on the 1958 French film Le Miroir à Deux Faces written by André Cayatte and Gérard Oury, which focused on a homely woman who becomes a beauty after plastic surgery.

Rose Morgan

  • When my date takes me home and kisses me good night, if I don't hear the philharmonic in my head, I dump him.
  • What, what? Yes, I have breasts. They cannot, however, be the subject of one of your papers.
  • It's not a date. We're just agreeing to eat at the same table.
  • By the way, would telling you now that I want sex tonight be enough of a warning?
  • Let's face it. They're not standing in line for me.
  • To tell you the truth, I think your theories about relationships are total bullshit.
  • I believe in love and lust and sex and romance. I don’t want everything to add up to some perfect equation. I want mess and chaos. I want someone to go crazy out of his mind for me. I want to feel passion and heat and sweat and madness. I want Valentines and Cupids and all the rest of that crap. I want it all.
  • I love it if someone knew me. Really knew me. What I like, what I'm afraid of. What kind of toothpaste I use. I think that will be wonderful.

Gregory Larkin

  • I want to be upfront with you. I am not interested in sex.
  • I don't care if you're pretty, I love you anyway!
  • The mathematical world is completely rational, uncomplicated by sex.

Claire Morgan

  • You are the mother of the bride, not the opening act.
  • Now you spend an extra hour in front of the mirror every morning and every night. And now you'll be the one to walk into a room and scan it for who looks better than you and who doesn't. And as the years go by, the numbers change. One day you'll walk into a room and you're the last woman any man notices.
  • Mother, the only thing you ever taught me about the Sabbath is that Bergdorf's wouldn't be as crowded.


Rose: Why don't you get the coffee?
Hannah: I've buried a husband, I've raised two daughters. I've made my coffee.

Rose: Look at me, I'm a grown woman in a prom dress.
Claire: Oh, please. You look adorable.
Rose: Adorable? I look like an over-the-hill Barbie Doll. It doesn't fit right, it's too tight.
Claire: Too many Sno Balls.
Rose: Why didn't you pick something looser and in my color?
Claire: Because Maids of Honor don't wear black.

Claire: Your hair looks good, the curls work. Why don't you get a perm?
Rose: I tried that once, I looked like Shirley Temple on crack.

Claire: Now you listen to me!
Rose: Take it easy, Claire!
Claire: Now, I want you to get up there and remember that this is MY day... and if you don't behave yourself, I'm gonna have your birth certificate blown up as a Christmas card!
Hannah: I should never have encouraged you to speak.


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