Rome (TV series)

Season One

The Stolen Eagle [1.1]

Narrator: Four hundred years after the last king was driven from the city, the Republic of Rome rules many nations, but cannot rule itself. The city is constantly roiled by conflict between the common people and the nobility. Power is shared, and order maintained by two soldiers, old friends Gnaeus Pompey Magnus and Gaius Julius Caesar. Once, Pompey was acknowledged by all to be the greater man, but for the last eight years, while Pompey has kept the peace in Rome, Caesar has waged a war of conquest in Gaul, that has made him even more rich and popular. The balance of power is shifting, and the nobility have grown fearful - Though of noble blood himself, Caesar stands with the common people. A man like that, an aristocrat with soldiers, money and the love of the people... Might make himself king.

Lucius Vorenus: [After a battle in which Pullo hit him and was clearly drunk, and is now being flogged] Legionary Titus Pullo is a hero of the XIII Legion, but look at him now! Justice knows every man's number. He has committed a terrible sacrilege, and he will pay for it with his life! As will any man here who breaks the law.

[Each soldier and officer looks slightly shaken by the flogging. Mark Anthony eats an apple, apparently enjoying it.]

Vorenus: Brawlers and drunkards will be flogged. Thieves will be strangled! Deserters will be crucified!

Titus Pullo: [Being released, the flogging over] Is that it? I was just beginning to enjoy myself.

Scipio: What a dreadful noise plebs make when they're happy.

Cato: This is music. Wait until Caesar starts them howling for our blood; then you'll hear something dreadful!

Vorenus: Fortune pisses on me.

Titus Pullo: Forculus, if you be the right god for the business here, I call on you to help. If you would open this door, then I would kill for you a fine white lamb, or, failing that, if I couldn't get a good one at a decent price, then six pigeons.

Atia: The man has tears in his eyes. Tears!

Octavia: He loves me.

Atia: A womanish husband is no use to anyone. And your servants! What a fuss! I think you feed them too much.

Titus Pullo: I have simpler tastes. I like to kill my enemies, take their gold and enjoy their women. That's it. Why tie yourself to one? Where's the flavor? Where's the joy?

Vorenus: Pullo, when is the last time you had a woman who wasn't crying or wanting payment?

Pullo: Look here, Mars! Look here, Mars! I am Titus Pullo! These bloody men are my gift to you.

How Titus Pullo Brought Down the Republic [1.2]

Titus Pullo: [on returning to Rome]] Here I come, girls! I'm gonna drink all the wine, smoke all the smoke, and fuck every whore in the city!

Atia: By the Five Furies, if I were not a genteel woman, I'd have you flayed and hung from a bracket at the door! Castor!

Castor: Yes, domina?

Atia: Fetch the dogs!

[Mark Antony, when discussing terms of Caesar's return to Rome]

Pompey: He sits alone in Ravenna with one mutinous skeleton of a legion and he dares to dictate terms to me!?

Mark Antony : Caesar has many more legions than the Thirteenth.

Scipio: Yes, on the far side of the Alps.

Mark Antony: Winter does not last forever. Spring comes. Snows melt.

Scipio: That is a threat!

Mark Antony : No, I assure you, that is no threat. Snows always melt.

[After Mark Anthony survives a presumed attempt on his life by Pompey's mob in Rome...]

Julius Caesar: After all these years... Pompey surprises me! I had hoped to provoke some kind of aggression, sure, but to try and kill a Tribune, in the forum... The man's found some hard black iron in his soul.

Mark Antony : Sure it was yon demented little worm Cato who put him up to it. [On the wine] It's excellent, this... So, what next?

Caesar: Let's see what the men have to say...

[Caesar heads off outside while Antony goes to wash himself up]

Caesar: Don't do that! [Puts an arm on Mark's shoulder] You look fine exactly as you are. Like Leonidas at Thermopylae.

[Caesar's speech to the XIII Legion, preluding the civil war against Pompey]

Caesar: Soldiers! Pompey, and the Senate, have formally declared that Gaius Julius Caesar is an enemy of Rome!

[The soldiers shout in denial]

Caesar: They have declared that I am a criminal. They have declared, in the fact, that all of you, ALSO, are criminals!

[The soldiers roar in disapproval]

Caesar: Tribune's veto was not exercised! People's Tribune, Mark Anthony, and fifty men of the XIII were assaulted by a thousand head of Pompeian scum.

[The soldiers boo again. From behind, Pullo watches it all.]

Caesar: A Tribune, of the Plebs, assaulted on the steps of the Senate house! Can you imagine a more terrible sacrilege!? Our beloved Republic is in the hands of madmen! This is a dark day, and I stand in a fork in the road - I can abide the law and surrender my arms to the Senate, and watch the Republic fall to tyranny and chaos, or, I can go home, with my sword in my hand, and run those maniacs TO THE TARPEIAN ROCK!

[The soldiers roar, supporting Caesar.]

Caesar: Legionary Titus Pullo, step forward! [Pullo is surprised to hear his name, but doesn't move] Titus Pullo!

[Pullo moves in the crowd, headed towards Caesar]

Caesar: Of fifty brave men of the XIII, whom fought Pompey's Thousand in the forum, and saved the Tribune, it was Legionary Titus Pullo whom drew first blood! [Picks up a purse and raises it] Here's five hundred Denarii!

[Throws the purse to Pullo]

Pullo: [Shocked] Very grateful, sir!

Caesar: Are you with me, Titus Pullo? Will you come with me to Rome?

Pullo: [Briefly stuttering] Yes- YES SIR! Certainly!

Caesar: Titus Pullo is with me! AND YOU, ARE YOU WITH ME!?

[The whole Legion roars in approval]

Vorena: What is going to happen?

Niobe: War is going to happen.

An Owl in a Thornbush [1.3]

Brutus: Mother, you are blinded by untapped lust. I'll get you a good big Cyrenian at the market and have done with it!

[Caesar has sent Vorenus ahead to scout with a squadron of cavalry]

Gaius Julius Caesar: Can we trust him?

Mark Antony: Who?

Gaius Julius Caesar: Lucius Vorenus.

Mark Antony: Vorenus? Deep Thirteenth, him. He'd follow the Eagle up Pluto's arse!

[Pullo instructs Vorenus on the fine points of wooing.]

Titus Pullo: Now, your best method of pleasing a woman is the warm, beating heart of an enemy. Oh, women say they don't like it, but they do! Makes them wet as October!

[discussing how to please Lucius's wife.]

Titus Pullo: Also: very important. When you couple with her there's this spot just above her cunny. It's like a button. Now, attend to that button and she will open up like a flower.

Lucius Vorenus: [outraged] How do you know this about her?!

Titus Pullo: [momentarily gobsmacked] All women have them! Ask anyone!

[On finding Rome unprotected by Pompeian troops:]

Lucius Vorenus: [aghast] This can only mean that the Republic has fallen.

Titus Pullo: And yet, the sky is still above us and the earth still below. Strange.

Vorenus: How could Mars allow such a thing to happen?

Pullo: Maybe he was out having a crap and missed it!

Stealing from Saturn [1.4]

Caesar: You are a thief. A foolish, incompetent thief. But we will treat your foolishness as some species of loyalty.

Caesar: I do not like to quarrel with fortune, and clearly she's taken you for a pet.

Caesar: [to Octavian after having an epileptic seizure] Vow to Orcus, never speak of this.

Octavian: [nodding his head yes in agreement]

The Ram Has Touched the Wall [1.5]

Caesar: They say a slave talks of bravery like a fish talks of flying.

Posca: They say that, do they? How very witty of them.

[Atia has informed Octavian she has engaged a tutor for him: one of the soldiers who rescued him.]

Octavian: Vorenus?

Atia of the Julii: Is that it? Not the sullen Catonian one, I don't like him. The cheerful, brutish one.

Octavian: [turning to go] Pullo.

Atia: What extraordinary names these plebs have. Pullo.

Egeria [1.6]

Atia: Octavian, have you penetrated anyone yet? Titus Pullo, didn't I tell you to get that sorted? What else?

Octavia: Perhaps you could arrange he kill someone.

Atia: That will happen in due course. We Julii always have the needful enemies.

Titus Pullo: What's your price, then?

Madame: One thousand.

Titus Pullo: Gerrhae! I could have half the whores in Narbo for that, and their mothers!

Madame: We're not in Narbo, wherever that might be.

Titus Pullo: All right, my dove, we'll pay, but the girl better fuck him like Helen of Troy with her arse on fire, or I'll know the reason why!

Atia: Well this last news from Greece cannot have improved your appetite.

Mark Antony: Hardly.

Atia: And is it really so bad? Caesar always finds a way to win.

Mark Antony: Pompey's gathered ten men for every one of Caesar's. Arithmetic has no mercy.

Newsreader: This month's public bread is provided by the Capitoline Brotherhood of Millers. The Brotherhood uses only the finest flour: true Roman bread for true Romans.

Mark Antony: [to Atia] I had not realised until now... what a wicked old harpy you are.

Atia: A large penis is always welcome.

Titus Pullo: This is cack, this is! I'm wet through!

Lucius Vorenus: We're perfectly safe - a very favorable offering was made to Triton before we left.

Pullo: Well, if Triton can't keep me drier than this, he can suck my cock!

[Ship's mast breaks]

Vorenus: Pullo, when will you learn to keep your fat mouth shut?!

Pharsalus [1.7]

Caesar: Our men must win or die. Pompey's men have... other options.

Caesar: Try to avoid bloodshed this time.

Posca: Wait a while, and Pompey can shave you instead.

Brutus: lf l had known what wretched company and rotten food l would endure, if l had known what an old fool is Pompey, l would never have left Rome.

Cicero: You may do as you wish. As for me, I intend to go from here and surrender myself to Caesar.

Cato: [outraged] Have you no dignity?! No honor?!

Cicero: Some little, I hope. Not as much as you, of course.

Scipio: [sympathetic] Caesar will kill you.

Cicero: That may be. I'm not afraid to die. I'm tired. I want to go home.

Vorenus: His hands trembled, sir. His clothes were dirty, there was water in his eyes -- he is broken. I saw no need to apprehend him. I'd like to add that Legionary Pullo took no part in my decision, sir.

Caesar: You saw "no need." Do you not see that Pompey may be broken like a Dacian catamite and still be dangerous?! If he is still living, he will be a standard around which our enemies will gather. As long as he can propped on a horse, he's dangerous! But you saw no need to apprehend him?!

Vorenus: I did not, sir.

Caesar: [furious] AND WHO BY THE SONS OF DIS GIVES YOU THE RIGHT TO MAKE SUCH JUDGEMENT?!

Vorenus: Sir, I am aware I have not done my duty and I respectfully ask your pardon.

Caesar: My pardon, he asks. I ought to have you scourged and crucified! [long pause] In future, you will remember that it is I that offers mercy. No one else. Clear?

Vorenus: Clear, sir.

Caesar: Dismissed.

[Vorenus and Pullo leave]

Mark Antony: I don't like to disagree with you, but you're being far too lenient with him. He let Pompey go and you let him live?! The man should be made an example of!

Caesar: Any other man, certainly. But those two, they found my stolen standard, stumbled upon the treasury gold, and now they survive a wreck that drowned an army and find Pompey Magnus on a beach. They have powerful gods on their side and I will not kill any man with friends of that sort.

Pompey Magnus: It didn't seem possible to lose, it's always a bad sign.

Caesarion [1.8]

King Ptolemy XIII: [presenting the head of Pompey Magnus] We were going to make him a body, with moving arms and legs, and do a mime show with real animals and everything, and...

Gaius Julius Caesar: [furious] SILENCE!

[long, heavy silence]

Gaius Julius Caesar: Shame on the House of Ptolemy for such barbarity. Shame.

Pothinus: But... you are enemies.

Gaius Julius Caesar: (shouts) He was a consul of Rome!

[guards put hands to their swords]

Gaius Julius Caesar: A consul of Rome, to die in this sordid way - quartered like some low thief? Shame!

[another long, heavy silence]

Gaius Julius Caesar: Where is the rest of him?

Pothinus (stammering) It... he, has been cremated. With all proper funeral rites, of course! With all decorum.

Gaius Julius Caesar I will return tomorrow, at which time you will give me the man that took Pompey's life.

Gaius Julius Caesar: Pompey's murderer?

Pothinus: Alas, he has run away.

Gaius Julius Caesar: Find him. In the meantime... [motions to Posca, who produces a scroll and hands it to Pothinus] These instruments tabulate the money that was borrowed by his majesty's illustrious father, Ptolemy XII. In the name of the Republic, I have come to collect.

Posca: Seventeen thousand, thousand drachmae.

Pothinus: Seventeen?! Absurd! Four, perhaps.

Posca: The tabulation includes all moneys borrowed from Pompey and other agents of the Republic now... unable to collect.

Pothinus: That is not just.

Posca: Post mortem interests of this type are legally entailed to the presiding consul, i.e. Gaius Julius Caesar. It's law.

Pothinus: Roman law.

Gaius Julius Caesar: Is there some other form of law, you wretched woman?

Pothinus: One thousand apologies, forgive us.

[Ptolemy XIII arises from his litter, and snatches the scroll from Pothinus, throwing it at Caesar's feet]

Ptolemy XIII: There! There's for your payment.

[Shocked mutterings from Ptolemy's entourage]

Theodotus: [stepping forward] So sorry!

Gaius Julius Caesar: His majesty forgets he's a vassal to Rome.

Ptolemy XIII: "Vassal"? "Vassal"?! I am no vassal! I am king! I am --

Gaius Julius Caesar: Sit down!

[Cowed, Ptolemy retreats back to sit on his litter]

Gaius Julius Caesar: Thank you.

Caesar: I have conquered Gaul. I have defeated Pompey Magnus. I think I can handle a small boy and a eunuch.

Marc Antony: I'm glad you're so confident. Some would call it hubris.

Caesar: It's only hubris if I fail.

Vorenus: Pullo, report to Princess Cleopatra and do whatever she tells you!

[Pullo reports for duty - which is to have wild sex with Cleopatra. Afterwards:]

Pullo: [exhales] Gods, that was something, let me tell you...

Vorenus: I don't want to hear about it! If you're wise, you'll never speak of this again.

Pullo: Why? I was only obeying orders. Bloody good orders, too!

Cicero: You should have no ill conscience, we only did what we have to do.

Brutus: No doubt Saturn said something of the sort after eating his children.

Marc Antony: If I ever again hear your name connected with murmurs of treachery, I will cut off these soft, pink hands and nail them to the senate door.

Utica [1.9]

Scipio: Where there's life, there's hope.

Cato: (sad smile) I think, if anything, we have disproved that proverb, old friend.

Titus Pullo: [on Vorenus' toga candida] You look like laundry!

Triumph [1.10]

Posca: The Roman people are not crying out for clean elections. They are crying out for jobs. They are crying out for clean water, for food, for stability and peace.

The Spoils [1.11]

Caesar: You know I've always looked upon you as a son...

Brutus: Oh dear, not one of those conversations.

Caesar: Be reasonable! You're on every wall in the city with a knife at my throat!

Brutus: Only tyrants need to worry about tyrant killers! And you are no tyrant! Haven't you told me so many times!

Marcus Junius Brutus: I betrayed nothing. Had you told me you were to march on Rome and asked me for my allegiance, I would have given it. I would've judged you insane, but I would've given you my allegiance because I look on you as my father.

Caesar: Brutus-

Marcus Junius Brutus: You did not ask me for my allegiance. You demanded it at swordpoint. I betrayed nothing.

Cassius: Look now. Look at that.

Marcus Junius Brutus: It is a chair. What of it?

Cassius: A chair? It's a throne!

Marcus Junius Brutus: I believe thrones are generally more decorative. That is decidedly plain, and chair-like.

[in his cell, about to be executed in the arena]

Titus Pullo: (holds up a cockroach) Janus, Gaia, and Dis, I humbly beg you accept this creature as my offering. And if it pleases you, I ask you to give Eirene long life. And same for my friend Lucius Vorenus and his family, if it's not too much. And... let Eirene know I'm sorry for what I did.

Caesar: [of an assassinated political opponent]I didn't know he existed until he didn't.

Kalends of February [1.12]

[Servilia has invited Atia over for a visit.]

Atia: Why would she want to see me? She hates me!

Mark Antony: So do I; that's no bar to friendship.

Season Two

Passover [2.1]

[Before Caesar's funeral.]

Antony: I've never fucked a woman in a funeral dress before.

Atia: Nor shall you now.

Antony: That's a shame. It'll have to be Merula then. [Atia's slave Merula stares in shock] Come here, old girl, jump on!

Atia: She'd eat you alive! Come on, this is no morning for foolery. Just get up.

Antony: [grabs Atia and tries to pull her into bed] Aw, come here.

Atia: Stop fooling around and get up!

Antony: I'm not rising from this bed until I fuck someone.

Atia: Fine, fine. Merula, fetch that German slut from the kitchen. [turns to her other slaves] And get it right or you'll be next for the King of Goats there.

Mark Antony: [indicates outside] Listen. Why so quiet? A tyrant is dead. Surely the people should be happy? Where is the cheering throng at your door? Where are the joyful cries of "Liberty"?

Servillia: The people fear change. A sombre mood is only...natural.

Brutus: When they realise they are free from tyranny, they will be glad.

Mark Antony: [coldly] The people loved Caesar. And they will hate you for what you have done.

Mark Antony: You boys play too rough for me. Knives in the Senate House? I didn't know you had it in you. No, I will serve out my term as consul and then return to the provinces, plough my fields and fuck my slaves like old Cincinnatus.

[Servillia joins with Cassius and Cicero in urging Brutus to murder Antony]

Brutus: You too, mother?

[After Antony orders the murderers of Caesar from Rome]

Cassius: You may wish as you will. We yet have all the Senate behind us and all the men of quality. [Furious, Antony storms over to Cassius]

Antony: [almost berserk with rage] And I have an angry mob, that will roast and eat your 'men of quality' in the ashes of the Senate House!

Son of Hades [2.2]

Antony: You're not saying that these men paid me to put their names on here.

Cicero: Oh, no... I assume they paid Posca.

Vorenus: I AM A SON OF HADES! I FUCK CONCORD IN HER ARSE!

Antony: Centurion Vorenus... as was.

Vorenus: [lying in bed] Sir.

Antony: [disgusted] Look at the fucking state of you.

Pullo: It's mourning dress, sir. He...

Antony: Mourning? You may well mourn. Caesar is dead, and it was you as good as held the knife. Stand to fucking attention when I'm talking to you! [Vorenus does.] You know that your name is disgraced forever?

Vorenus: I do, sir.

Antony: "I do, sir"? Why then are you still alive? Why have you not done your damned duty and opened your stomach?

Vorenus: I would like that above all things, sir. But Dis is my master, and he will take me when he chooses. At present, he wishes for me to suffer here, on this earth.

Antony: You are wrong, Centurion. Dis is not your master. I am your master, by sacred oath under the standards of the Thirteenth. [stoops to pick up the rotting head on the floor] And this, I take it, was Erastes Fulmen?

Pullo: I told him to get rid, but it calms him to look at the thing.

Antony: Not content to let our great father die, you start a damn war on the Aventine that threatens to engulf the whole fucking city! [tosses Erastes' head out the door] Now... would you like a chance to redeem yourself, Centurion?

Vorenus: There's no redemption.

Antony: No man is beyond redemption, Lucius. Not even you.

These being the words of Marcus Tullius Cicero [2.3]

Cicero: Please continue with your threats; I would hate to submit to implication alone.

Clerk (holding up a scroll for all to see): These being the words of Marcus Tullius Cicero: (reading) "When I was a young man, I defended the State. As an old man, I shall not abandon it. I give sincere thanks to Mark Antony, who has generously presented me with the most promising theme imaginable. I address you directly, Antony. Please listen as if you... as if you..."

Mark Antony: Go on...

Clerk (shaken): "...please listen, as if you were sober and intelligent, and not a drink-sodden, sex-addled wreck."

[Senators start leaving the Senate hall]

Clerk: "You are certainly not without accomplishments: it is a rare man who can boast of becoming a bankrupt before even coming of age. You have brought upon us war, pestilence and destruction. You are Rome's Helen of Troy. But then... but then..."

Mark Antony (fuming): Go on... GO ON!

Clerk: "...a woman's role has always suited you best."

[Antony screams in rage, and proceeds to beat the Clerk to death with the scroll. He looks up and finds the Senate completely empty.]

Testudo et Lepus (The Tortoise and the Hare) [2.4]

Cicero: Oh, how I tire of young men and their ambitions.

[Following the Battle of Mutina]

Mark Anthony: How many dead in total?

Centurion: 8,000 men, sir, give or take.

Posca: 8,000?!

Mark Anthony: Oh, do cheer up! You're still alive, aren't you!?

Posca: I do hope so; if this is the afterlife, it is extremely disappointing!

Heroes of the Republic [2.5]

Vorenus: These are my daughters, redeemed from slavery. The eldest has been prostituted, the boy is my wife's child by another man. You will treat them with respect and kindness - or I will know the reason why.

[Following Octavian's proposal to name Brutus and Cassius enemies of the state]

Octavian: My father died on this floor. Right there. Stabbed 27 times, butchered by men he called his friends. Who will tell me that is not murder? [Several soldiers enter the Senate hall as the Senators mutter angrily] Who will tell my legions, who love Caesar as I do, that that is not murder?! [the soldiers draw their swords. Silence falls] Who will speak against the motion?

[After Octavian uses his position as Consul for his own ends]

Tyro: Some willow tea, perhaps?

Cicero: Henbane, more like. I've been outmanoeuvred by a child.

Philippi [2.6]

Mark Antony [Giving Agrippa instructions to pass to Vorenus and Pullo about the assassination of Cicero] Tell them to cut off his hands and nail them to the Senate door. I told the old fool I'd do it if he ever crossed me again. Nobody can possibly say that I don't keep my word.

Eirene: [in tears] I'm preglant!

Titus Pullo: What?

Eirene: I'm preglant! Preglant!!

Titus Pullo: [surprised, but delighted] What, pregnant?

Eirene: Whatever you call it!

Cicero: What is your name, young man?

Pullo: Titus Pullo, sir. Late of the Thirteenth.

Cicero: Ah, the famous Titus Pullo. I'm honoured.

Pullo: Likewise, honoured. Talk about famous. Everyone's heard of Cicero.

Cicero: Yes. I daresay your work today will earn you immortality.

Pullo: How's that?

Cicero: I will be in all the history books. My killer's name, no doubt, will live on also.

Pullo: [slightly disappointed] Ah, my name... thought you meant me. [looks at a fruit tree] Good peaches!

Cicero: Yes, just getting ripe. There's no way I can dissuade you from your task, I suppose? I have a great deal of money.

Pullo: No, sorry. Normally, I'd be tempted, but you're far too important. Imagine the fuss, I get back and I haven't done my job.

[Before the Battle of Philippi]

Brutus: Heavens, I entirely forgot! Today's your birthday, isn't it?

Cassius: Is it? I believe you're right.

Brutus: [shakes his hand] Happy Birthday. Sorry there's no cake.

Cassius: Next year, eh? You bake me an extra big one.

Brutus: I shan't forget.

Cassius: No cinnamon, it makes me sneeze.

[At Philippi]

Antony: [To Octavian] Watch closely, boy. This is how history is made. Now, let's have some fun! [gives the order to advance]

Octavian: What's happening? Do you know?

Antony: No idea. On my command, forward!

Octavian: Where are you going?

Antony: When in doubt... ATTACK!

[The cavalry charges with Antony at their head. Agrippa looks after them longingly.]

Octavian: Go.

Agrippa: Thank you. (to troopers) You two, on me!

[Rides after Antony.]

[Cassius is brought back from the battle line, mortally wounded.]

Brutus: Cassius? What happened?

Cassius: Not sure, to be honest. Hell of a birthday...

[As Antony's forces approach, Brutus decides to go down fighting.]

Brutus: Give my best to my mother. Tell her... tell her something suitable.

[In the aftermath of the Battle of Phillipi]

Mark Anthony: Breathe deep, boy. The smell of victory.

Octavian: [disdainful] Smoke, shit and rotting flesh.

Mark Anthony: Beautiful, isn't it?

Death Mask [2.7]

[Servilia, kneeling in front of Atia's house, curses Atia, then commits suicide followed by her slave, Eleni.]

Marc Antony: ...Now that's an exit.

A Necessary Fiction [2.8]

Titus Pullo: Nobody's a traitor until they are.

Newsreader: From pliant virgins to learned greeks - Rufus has slaves for every budget.

[Regarding Mark Antony's affair with Atia and Octavia's affair with Agrippa]

Mark Antony: So what? What if it is true, huh? What are you going to do about it? There is nothing you can do about it.

Octavian: I shall send my women to their house... [Antony scoffs] ...where they shall remain, in seclusion, under guard until I say otherwise.

Atia: I'll do no such thing--!

Octavian: Silence. [to Antony] You. You shall leave this city.

Mark Antony: "Leave this city"?!

Octavian: You shall go east to your provinces, and you shall not come back.

Mark Antony: [scoffs] Or else what, boy?

Octavian: You shall leave this city or I shall declare that our alliance is broken. I shall have this sad story told in the Forum, I shall have it posted in every city in Italy, and you know the people are not so liberal with their wives as you are. They will say you wear cuckold's horns. They will say your wife betrayed you with a low-born pleb on my staff. You will be a figure of fun. The proles will laugh at you in the street. Your soldiers will mock you behind your back.

[By this point trembling with fury, Antony grabs Octavian's throat to throttle him but hesitates. Octavian does not flinch.]

Octavian: [whispers] Go on, strike me. See what happens.

[Slowly, Antony releases his grip, and departs.]

Deus Impeditio Esuritori Nullus [2.9]

Vorenus: Sir your wife instructed me to tell you something.

Antony: Oh?

Vorenus: She instructed me to tell you that "you are cowardly scum".

Antony: [laughs] She did, did she? And what's your opinion of that?

Vorenus: It's not my place to have an opinion , Sir.

Antony: Ah, tell me anyway.

Vorenus: Is that an order?

Antony: Yes. That's an order.

Vorenus: You're no coward, but you do have a strong disease in your soul. A disease that will eat away at you, until you die.

Antony: Really? Hmm... and what is this disease?

Vorenus: I don't know. I'm not a doctor.

Antony: No, no you're not. So how can you be so sure of your diagnosis?

Vorenus: I recognize your symptoms. I have the same sickness.

De Patre Vostro [2.10]

Antony: Do you believe there is an afterlife?

Vorenus: Of course.

Antony: Well, there are people who say no. And this is all there is.

Vorenus: Who says that?

Antony: Learned men. Greeks, probably.

Vorenus: Greeks?

Antony: Mmm.

Vorenus: Greeks talk a whole pile of nonsense.

Antony: Fuck 'em.

Vorenus: Fuck 'em.

Antony [examining the knife Cleopatra apparently used to kill herself] No - this won't do. Let's use a proper, Roman sword.

[Vorenus offers his sword, Antony takes it, regards it for a moment then draws it]

Antony: It's a damn good sword. [Throws the sheath away, looks around the room] It's a good place to die at any rate. Could've been a ditch in Gaul. Men that knew Alexander ... once stood here.

Vorenus: Good a place as any, I suppose

Antony: Lucius Vorenus - iron to the end. Don't you die here with me. You get out while you can.

Vorenus: I'll do that. It's been an honour, serving with you Sir.

Antony: Has it? I... I hope so. [positions the tip of the sword above his stomach] Brace it there, eh?

Vorenus: Any instructions or messages, sir?

Antony: No. Just... tell the people I died well. I died Roman.

[Discussing Pullo]

Cleopatra: Is he a good man?

Vorenus: Define "good".

Octavian: I was all sweetness and light with her... charm itself.

Maecenas: Yes, that is your most disheartening manner.

Cleopatra: [hissing into Octavian's ear] You have a rotten soul. [dies]

Maecenas: What did she say?

Octavian: She said I had a rotten soul.

Maecenas: Ah. Well, can't argue with that.

Octavia: Today is your triumph as much as his. Mother to the First Citizen, you should be happy.

Atia: [softly] Hooray.

Octavia: All my life, I've watched you strive for this moment. Look at you... it's amusing, isn't it? I don't know what i shall do if you give up.

[Atia moves to the head of the women's procession for Augustus' triumph]

Livia: Excuse me?

Atia: Yes?

Livia: Oh, I don't mind really, but it is really I who should go first. If you consult the priests, I'll think you'll find the wife takes precedence.

Atia: I don't give a fuck what the priests say. I'll not let a vicious little trollop like you walk ahead of me. I go first.

Livia: I take no offense, of course. You are not yourself.

Atia: I know who you are. I can see you. You're swearing now that, someday, you'll destroy me. Remember that far better women than you have sworn to do the same. Go look for them now.

[last lines of the series]

Titus Pullo: (to Caesarion) About your father...

External links

Wikipedia

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Rome (TV series)

Rome quotes at the Internet Movie Database