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Postman Pat: The Movie

2014 film by Mike Disa

Postman Pat: The Movie is a 2014 3D computer animated children's comedy film based on the television series Postman Pat by John Cunliffe and Ivor Wood.

Directed by Mike Disa. Written by Nicole Dubuc. Story by Annika Bluhm and Kim Fuller.
He's about to deliver the goods!  (taglines)

Postman Pat

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  • [first lines] Oh, thanks, Jess. It wouldn't do to forget my hat on such a lovely morning.
  • Oh, Alf. Not again.
  • [to the PATBOT 3000] Well then, good luck. And remember, the most important thing for a postman is... [PATBOT 3000: Speed, Efficiency, Ruling the world.] Well. I was going to say being friendly. You know the human touch.
  • Oh Muffins.
  • I don't feel like a very happy man.

Edwin Carbunkle

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  • [first lines] Lots of wasted time, space and energy here, Ben. Not sure even my machines can save this place.
  • You are...Postman Clifton.
  • Wool gathering. (laughs) That was rather good.
  • My uncle was eaten by Dingos, Mr. Brown.
  • [While showing Mr. Brown an image of the UDM 3000] This programmable postman is 10x faster than a human. The perfect worker.
  • [After the meeting with Mr. Brown] SDS will use my robots, Mr. Brown. And once they've replaced your postmen, I'll replace you. [laughs evilly]
  • [Breaking the fourth wall] A robot would never embarrass the company like this.
  • [After watching Pat's performance on TV] Yes. Yes, they do.
  • [Introducing the PATBOT 3000 to Pat] The PATBOT 3000. This mechanical marvel will be taking over your postal duties. Temporarily, of course.
  • [To Stagehand Robin] Lose the cat.
  • [To Mrs. Goggins] Madam, this is private property and you are trespassing. Shall I ring someone to show you out?
  • [After firing all of SDS' human employees] [chuckles evilly] Robots, report for duty. We're taking over this operation. At last, no more inefficient humans cluttering up my mailroom. Now that everyone loves Postman Pat, they'll turn a blind eye as I replace every deliveryman in the Special Delivery Service with my glorious money-making machines! [laughs] Profits will skyrocket! The board of directors will retire that weak-kneed Brown AND PROMOTE ME TO CEO! And I won't stop there. We'll diversify into other businesses. We'll make automated Bank Tellers, Robotic technical support, even COMPUTER ANIMATED MOVIES! [laughing evilly] FLY, MY PRETTIES! FLY! FLY! Today England, TOMORROW, THE WORLD! [laughs evilly]
  • [To Pat] Oh, no. You're not ruining this now. I've finally got that fool of a CEO where I want him. If it were up to him, SDS would stay a quaint little delivery service dedicated to Customer Service and The Human Touch. Bleh! [Pat: But I-I thought that's what all this was for. To help keep SDS the way it's always been.] Your publicity was to make people love Postman Pat. [Shows Pat a video of Patbots marching out of the SDS Sorting Office on his Phone] Now, I can replace all of SDS's human workers with Patbots! And when I become CEO, SDS will become the biggest, most Profitable company in the world!
  • [To Mr. Brown] Give me the SDS, Brown. The days of lovable friendly mailmen helping quaint country characters with their stupid little problems is over. The future belong to machines. AND TO ME!!! [laughing maniacally]
  • [last lines] You can't do this to me. I'm the future! I'll just move to America, I'm not even a bad guy there, YOU'LL SEE! I'll be back!, I'll Be Back I'LL BE BACK!!! Nobody understands genius.

Ben Taylor

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  • [first lines] Pat! Am I glad to see you.
  • [as the people of Greendale confront him about the PATBOT 3000's behavior] Look, I know he's been a bit off lately, but this is Pat we're talking about. He'd never let us down on purpose.
  • Pat's under a lot of pressure. I'm sure he'll be back to normal once this telly business blows over.
  • Pat, you're not going along with this are you?

Julian Clifton

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  • [first lines] Sorry, Dad. I'm practicing the trick shot you taught me.
  • Are you sure, Dad? I'm getting pretty good.
  • Dad, I don't play for Pencaster yet.
  • [after hearing You're the One is coming to Greendale] Dad? Did you hear that? They're coming here!
  • Dad's muffed it. Hasn't he, Mum?
  • Jess? Oi, Jess!
  • [after seeing all the people of Greendale at the sorting office] It looks like everyone in town's here. I wonder what's going on Jess? [Jess meows 'I don't know']
  • [after the PATBOT 3000 has fired Ben Taylor] Dad, you can't do this. Ben is your best friend. You've always told the most important things in the world are friends and family. Didn't you mean it?

Jess

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  • [repeated line] Meow.
  • Hmm?
  • Mmm-Hmm!
  • Mmm-Mmm!
  • We? Mmm.

Wilf

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  • I'm gonna have to keep an eye on this Postman Pat.
  • You should have stuck to letters, Pat! You need to be willing to stop at nothing to make in showbiz! I learned that from Hannah Montana.
  • Jings, Crivens and help ma boab. He's a robot.
  • This is just too good to be true! Postman Pat's a cheat! Robots can't enter talent competitions!
  • STOP! STOP THE SHOW!!
  • Oh my allergies.

Josh

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  • A talent agent with only one client?
  • Thought I sing a song.
  • I've had a few dancing lessons too.
  • Oh yeah, that was good. [Wilf hits his head] Ow! What'd you do that for? [Wilf: Don't clap for your enemy!] But he's good.
  • [while playing a video game with Jess] Pat, your cat's amazing. He's already beaten Wilf's high score. What's his name?
  • Mmm-hmm. Charm, love. Got it.
  • [after Wilf snatches his game console from him] Hey! I was playing that.
  • Oh yeah, it's great, Wilf. You deliver mail, have a cat and be nice to people. Every now and then you can rescue a sheep. It's the highest game around. Totally massive.
  • [after turning off the Patbots with Carbunkle's phone] Please. Easiest game ever.

Others

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Michael Lam: Hi, Pat. Hi, Sara. Hey, Julian. [Amy: Hi, Michael.] [singing] Oh I am the very model of a modern major general of information vegetable...
Ajay Bains: Yo, yo, yo. Check it! MC Ajay has a sick beatle drop on y'all. Innit?
Reverend Peter Timms: To forgive is divine.
Ben Taylor: Mr. Carbunkle, Pat if our very best postman...
PC Arthur Selby: Alas, poor Yorick! What's all this then?
Ted Glenn: Oh, yes, folks have often said how much I look like Michael Bublé.
Major Forbes: No, it's Justin Bieber you wanted to be.

Dialogue

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[Pat & Jess drive through Greendale while listening to Please Mr. Postman by The Saturdays]
Jess: Meow.
George Lancaster: Hello, Jess.
Miss Rebecca Hubbard: Good morning, Pat.
George Lancaster: Morning, Pat.
Pat: Morning, George.
Dr. Sylvia Gibson: Hello, Pat.
Dorothy Thompson: Good morning, Pat.
[Ted Glenn & Amy Wrigglesworth are walking down the street. Jess pops his head out the post van's window]
Ted Glenn': [chattering]
Jess: Meow!
Ted Glenn: Hello, Pat.
Amy Wrigglesworth: Good morning, Pat.
Pat: Hello, Ted. Nice to see you, Amy. [stops his van] Good morning, Constable Selby.
PC Arthur Selby: Good morning, Pat. [lets Lauren Taylor and the children cross]
Lauren Taylor: Good morning, Pat.
Bill Thompson: Good morning, Pat.
Charlie Pringle: Hello, Mr. Clifton.
Lucy Selby: Morning, Jess.
Meera Bains: Morning, Pat.
Lizzy Taylor: Pat. Oh, Pat. I have something for you.
Pat: [exits his post van] Yes, Lizzy?
Jess: [peeks out of the post van window] Hmm?
Lizzy Taylor: I've a very special letter for you to deliver.
[Lizzy hands Pat a pink letter for Father Christmas]
Pat: It's a bit early for letters to Father Christmas isn't it?
Lizzy Taylor: [whispering] I want to avoid the rush.
Pat: Well this is a very special letter.
PC Arthur Selby: Hmmm.
Pat: I'll make sure it gets delivered.
Lizzy Taylor: I knew you would, Pat. [kisses Pat on the cheek as Lauren comes to collect her] Mwah.
Lauren Taylor: Thank you, Pat. Say hello to Sara for me.
[The children say goodbye to Pat]
Charlie Pringle: Goodbye, Mr. Clifton.
Bill Thompson: Goodbye, Pat.
Pat: Goodbye, Lizzy. Bye, Lauren. Have a good day, Constable.
PC Arthur Selby You too, Pat.
Jess: Meow.
[Pat then drives away]
PC Arthur Selby: Huh. Wish I was a postman.
[Pat and Jess arrive at the Greendale post office where Mrs. Goggins the postmistress is outside with some parcels]
Mrs. Goggins: Good morning, Pat.
Pat: Hello, Mrs. Goggins. Any local deliveries today?
Mrs. Goggins: [hands Pat 2 small parcels] Just these, Pat.
Pat: [takes the parcels] Thanks.
Mrs. Goggins: [hands Pat more parcels] And a few things to keep in mind today, Pat. Michael's repainting his shop. So you mustn't use the letterbox.
Pat: Got it.
Mrs Goggins: And Julia Pottage has a dreadful cold. So don't ring the bell.
Pat: Right. That's all then?
Mrs. Goggins: Have a good day
Pat: Thanks. Let's go, Jess.
[Jess, buried under the parcels meows annoyed. Pat then drives away as Mrs. Goggins wave bye to him]
[Cut to night, Pat & Jess return home after work]
Pat: Oh goodness, Jess, what a day. Do you think Sara will be very disappointed about canceling the trip?
Jess: Meow.
Pat: Well maybe she wasn't looking forward to Italy all that much.
[Sara opens the door with a book, chef's hat and fake mustache]
Sara Clifton: Bonegerno.
Jess: Meow! [hides under Pat's legs]
Pat: Uh... oh. Sara? Are we having a fancy dress party?
Sara Clifton: No silly, I just wanted to get us in the mood for our holiday. Come in or as they say in Italy; [speaks false Italian] Oh. Or maybe that's something about a hedgehog. Oh I'm so excited, Pat. Did you know Italian is one of the most romantic languages? [Pat & Jess look at each other nervously] I've been looking at hotels. They're a bit expensive.
Pat: Sara, I um...
Sara Clifton: But we've been looking forward to this trip for so long.
Pat: I-I have to tell you something.
Sara: Oh, me too, Pat. I think we should go to Venice first.
Pat: Right. Only one small thing, a man from head office..
Jess: Mmmm. Meow?
Pat: ...Came by today.
Jess: Meow!
Pat: Smoke?
Sara Oh! The Caprese Salad! [runs into the kitchen] Oh no. [clattering noises are head]
Pat: Need some help love?
Sara: Oh no! I'm all right. Thank you!
Pat: [to Julian] Does one actually cook a Caprese Salad?
Julian Clifton: She does.

Taglines

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  • He's really taking off!
  • Me-ooowww!
  • Do the Pat-Bot!

Cast

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