Patrick Allen

British actor (1927–2006)

John Keith Patrick Allen (17 March 192728 July 2006) was a British actor and voice actor.

Patrick Allen in 2005

Allen was the voiceover for numerous trails and idents on British digital channel E4. His voiceover pieces were regularly irreverent and very funny, and matched the young, fun style of the channel. His vocal contributions to the channel have become very popular among young people in the UK, probably one of the coolest pensioners in the UK!

'Blair Witch Project' Trail

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Girl: [crying in film] It's all my fault!
Allen: [voiceover] Yes, it's all your fault, you big blubbering baby! It's your fault we're lost, it's your fault everyone's gonna die, and it's your fault the camera work is so shoddy I can't see a ruddy thing.


'Brat Camp USA' Trail

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  • Do I care? No I flipping well don't!
  • String 'em up and watch the piggies squeal!


E4 Films Trails

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  • Big Shiny Films in your Dinky Little Home


E4 Music Trails

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  • In 1885 we invented music television. We just didn't bother telling anybody.
  • Chucking Spunky Tunes In Your Tellybox


E4 Udderbelly

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  • Behold the E4 Udderbelly! An Edinburgh Festival venue that's a ruddy inflatable cow!


'Scream' Trail

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  • I Scream! You Scream! We all ruddy well Scream!


'She's All That' Trail

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  • He's the popular high school jock. She's the geek nobody can be bothered to speak to. You'll never guess what happens next! Well...you probably will.


'Six Feet Under' Trail

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  • Only we has got Six Chuffing Feet


'The Simple Life'/'Britney & Kevin: Chaotic' Trail

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  • Paris squashed against Britney in your gaff
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