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O'Grady

American television series

O'Grady is an American adult animated television show created by Tom Snyder and Carl Adams and developed for TV by co-star Holly Schlesinger. It stars Melissa Bardin Galsky and H. Jon Benjamin, among other Soup2nuts Productions alumni, as high school students Abby, Beth, Harold, and Kevin, and chronicles their lives along with those of other residents of O'Grady, a fictional town which is periodically plagued by "The Weirdness."

Season 1

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Party Gong

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Kevin: Alright, Harold, your first phone number. You should get this framed.
Harold: Already had it photocopied.
Abby: This party is gonna be awesome. Your mom will never know about it and Pete will never know what kissed him.
Beth: What? What did you just say?
Abby: Pete will never know what hit him.

O'Grady Idol

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Kevin: Look what you did, Abby. This string was the last straw... that you broke... which was the last... straw. You know what I mean!
Kevin: See anyone look up?
Abby: No, did you?
Kevin: No, truce?
Abby: Truce.
Kevin: I call roof.
Abby: I call fire escape. Roof's that way.
Kevin: Fire escape's that way. I got the fire escape!
Abby: I got the roof!
Kevin: See ya tommorow!
Abby: Good luck!

Magnets

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Jamaican Hippie: Will you be a witness to my poem?
Abby: [confused] What?
Jamaican Hippie: [talking while making spastic physical movements] "Earth now in confusion with form as I walk.

alone, reaching for love, struggle, velvet! Now, now alone! What'd you think?

Abby: Oh, you're asking me what I thought? I thought that was part of the poem. [imitates Jamaican Hippie and using similar physical movements] You...are...a...walking...stereotype...The...sixties...called,...They...want...their...hat... back!
Jamaican Hippie: Thank you for your honesty. [grabs Abby's hand] You are my new Muse!
Abby: Okay, no touching, but we do except tips!
Abby: Kevin, what are you doing?!
Kevin: I'm eating!
Abby: Off the floor?!
Kevin: What? It's not dirty unless it stays there for like an hour (eats food from the floor)
Abby: Kevin, you are so disgusting!
Kevin: Mmmm, turkey!
Abby: They don't even serve turkey here!
Kevin: They don't?
Abby: No, spit it out!
Kevin: Okay, (spits into his hand)
Abby: Eww, not in front of me!
Kevin: Okay, I'll just put it back into my mouth (puts it back into his mouth)
Abby: Eww!
Kevin: That's good turkey!

Sign Language

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Dr. Myers: Wow, Kevin! How do you get the street signs to obey you? Show me your mastery!
Kevin: Well, Dr. Myers, you just ask them.
Dr. Myers: Is that all?
Kevin: Yeah, well, they're public service signs, they're here to help.
Gym Coach: Well Abby, without you, we actually won a game of softball!

Bubble Heads

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Kevin's Bubble: Who else beside Harold is your friend?
Kevin: I got lots of friends!
Kevin's Bubble: Like who? Your dolls?
Kevin: [pops bubble] Shut up!
Kevin's Bubble: [laughs] You still play with dolls!
Kevin: [swats bubble away] No I don't! Those are action figures!
Kevin's Bubble: Yeah, whatever man.
Abby: Wow Iris, you must really like pudding!
Iris: No, I just like to lick spoons.

Robo-Babies

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Beth: You know, I read somewhere that certain people have psychological disorders that make them hate their own babies.
Abby: Beth!
Beth: Oh no, I didn't mean you, I meant her.
Other girl: Hey!
Beth: I didn't really mean you.
Beth: So for awhile I was thinking the weirdness was that there was no weirdness, which would totally be the weirdest weirdness ever, right?

Sugar Hill

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[to Harold]
Phillip: No one gets between me and my Lingonberry, no one, no one.
Dr. Myers: You're very good at this Phillip, very creepy.
Kevin: Hey, Abby, can I borrow your cell phone?
[Abby hands Kevin her cell phone]
Abby: Who are you calling?
Kevin: Pizza place.
Abby: But we're in the pizza place.
Kevin: Yeah, I'd like a pizza for delivery. Abby, do you want anything?
Abby: I'll have mushrooms on it but wh-
Kevin: I'll have one half mushroom, half plain
Abby: Wait, you're using my minutes because you're too lazy to get up and walk to the counter?
Kevin: Yeah. Oh, I'm over at the booth in the corner, I'm waving my hand.
Abby: I want a soda.
Kevin: Okay, bye. [hangs up]
Abby: Kevin, I wanted a soda.
Kevin: Abby, the counter's right there, just get up and get it.

Old Cold

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Old Harold: You know Beth, I've always admired you.
Beth: Really?
Old Harold: Yes. I believe someday you'll change the world in a dismal, almost insignificant way.
Beth: Thanks! I think.
Kevin: [about secluded location] It's the perfect place to hang out!
Harold: Or make out!
Abby: Ew! Don't even think about it.
Kevin: I am not making out with Abby!
Abby: I'd rather make out with Harold than make out with Kevin!
Kevin: I'd rather make out with Harold than make out with Abby!
Beth: Why dosent anybody want to make out with me?
Abby: Okay, there will be no making out!
Harold: There is some uncomfortable sexual tension in this car!

No Pain, No Gain

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Kevin: So how's she taking it?
Abby: Um, yeah pretty well. I just wouldn't mention S-P-I-N-A-C-H.
Kevin: Spine ache?
Abby: Spinach!
Beth: Aaah!
Beth: O'Grady got all Hollywood.
Harold: I know! I've already had my right arm in three scenes!
Abby: Oh my God, Harold, I saw your arm, it looked really good.

Remotes

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Brooke: There's an old saying, Abby. Keep your friends close, and your enemies closer. See you at practice tomorrow girls. (to Heather) Heather!
Abby: Freak.
Beth: Yeah.
Abby: What did she mean by that enemies closer thing?
Beth: I think she meant quit.
Abby: Time!
Beth: 16 seconds.
Abby: How is our relationship gonna move forward if we cannot expend more than 30 seconds together?
Beth: Umm, don't you have to have a relationship with someone before you can move forward?

Season 2

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Frenched

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Abby: Hey, why is Phillip passed out on the sidewalk out front?
Harold: He's on his break.
Abby: You're a lifeguard?
Kevin: Yea!
Abby: At this pool?
Kevin: Oh yeah, all summer long, baby!
Abby: Huh.
Kevin: What?
Abby: Oh I was just wondering how this sounds: Welcome To Captain Frogurts, I'm so sorry for your lost.
Kevin: Oh you heard about that kid this morning?

Big Jerk on Campus

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Harold: [after spitting out the bad slice of pizza] I don't know what this is, but it ain't no damn pizza! Where's the sauce?! Where's the greasey cheese?! Where's the pepperon-WHAT THE?!
Pizza Guy: Heh, you're freaking out.
Harold: Move, move over!
Pizza Guy: Whoa!
Derrick: I should probably thank you, ya know, for sitting there while I worked on my songs and all.
Abby: Don't you mean for inspiring you?
Derrick: Yeah, well...whatever you wanna call it
Abby: What about the dump?
Derrick: Yeah...
Abby: And the underpass?
Derrick: Yeah...
Abby: And the basement?
Derrick: We did some pretty crazy stuff when we were kids, didn't we?
Abby: It was yesterday, Derrick
Derrick: I know...seems like yesterday...
Abby: That's cuz it was
Derrick: I know...it totally seems like it.

Cast

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