My Life as a Teenage Robot
It Came from Next Door [1a]Edit
- Brad: Hi, Jenny, my name's Brad– Whoa, a real life robot!
- Jenny: A real life teenager!
- Both: [in unison] Whoa! Look at that, and those and the hair. [laughs]
- Brad: So, you're like a super hero who goes around the world having death-defying adventures and defeating dastardly villains?
- Jenny: Mm-hmm.
- Brad: Sweet!
- Jenny: And you're a teenager who goes to high school and meet tons of other kids and hangs out with them?
- Brad: Of course.
- Jenny: Cool!
Pest Control [1b]Edit
Raggedy Android [2a]Edit
- Brad: This year, Tuck's gonna face his fears and ride the Ferris Wheel!
- Jenny: Tuck's afraid of heights?
- Brad: No, giant wheels. Anything bigger than a car tire gives him the heebie-jeebies.
- Tuck: But this year, I'm gonna beat Mr. Ferris and his Giant Hoop of Horror!
- Brad: [about Jenny] Come on, Doc, I'm sure no-one will notice her.
- Nora: [skeptical] A 6 and a half foot mechanical girl, and no-one will notice?
- Jenny: Please, Mom. There's gotta be some way I can go.
- Nora: I'm sorry, XJ-9. [Jenny starts simmering]
- Brad: Tuck, we'd better go.
- Tuck: Aw, but I wanna see the fight.
- Jenny: [getting really mad] You never let me do... ANYTHING I WANT! WORK, WORK, WORK! I never get to have any fun! If you don't let me go, I'll... I'll–
- Nora: Don't you raise you lasers to me, young lady!
- [Jenny starts crying her eyes out]
Class Action [2b]Edit
Attack of the 5 1/2 Ft. Geek [3a]Edit
- [Sheldon is being thrown across the room by a bunch of bullies]
- Jenny: Excuse me, I need to speak with the young man you're terrorizing.
Doom with a View [3b]Edit
Hear No Evil [4a]Edit
Unlicensed Flying Object [4b]Edit
- Alien Karl: [as he and his wife walk back to their UFO] Yeah, well, personally, I can't wait to get off this hick planet. Bunch of rip-off artists, these earthlings. $5 for a cup of coffee. No extraterrestrial discount at the hotel, and I know that bellboy stole my tricorder!
- Nora: Earrings? I designed a "state of the art", crime-fighting robot, not some simple mannequin to hang with googols and gimcrackery!
Party Machine / Speak No Evil [1.5]Edit
- Jenny: Your little girl is growing up.
- Nora: You're right, XJ-9. Well technically you're wrong because you're a robot and will remain a teenager forever, but metaphorically, you're absolutely right.
- Jenny: How is it, again, that you know the Minutians will land here?
- Nora: They always land here. Why do you think I moved here?
- Tuck: Hi, Jenny! How was Japan?
- Jenny: [in Japanese] Good afternoon.
- Tuck: "Konichiwa"? Cool! [He and his brother were given 2 gifts from Jenny] For us?
- Brad: Aw, you didn't have to bring these.
- Jenny: [in Japanese] Eh, no big.
- Tuck: "So ne". Hahaha!
- Brad: Hahaha! I got to run to the mall. Hey, Jenny, you want to come?
- Jenny: [in Japanese] Sure.
- Brad: Huh?
- Jenny: [in Japanese] What's wrong with you? Don't you hear me? I love going to the mall. [she is surprised] Why Japanese? Why am I only speaking Japanese? Why? AAAAAAAAAAAAHHH!
See No Evil / The Great Unwashed [1.6]Edit
- Brad: Jenny, get your eyes!
- Jenny: Come on, Brad, don't give up now, we almost got him!
- Brad: Get your eyes, Jenny!
- Jenny: Tuck, now your chance.
- Tuck: Get those eyes!
The Return of the Raggedy Android / The Boy Who Cried Robot [1.7]Edit
- Brad: Oh! Hi! what's your name?
- Jenny (chuckles): Jenny.
- Brad: Jenny,huh?
- Brad: Aheh-hehe.
- Jenny (chuckles)
- Brad: My best friend's name is Jen...
- Jenny: Best friend, huh?
- Brad: Wow, what happened? You look totally...normal.
Brad: Hey, Jenny. Jenny: (Overwhelmed of Tuck; yelling) WWWHHHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAATTTTTT!?!?!?!?!? Oh! Brad, I am so sorry.
Sibling Tsunami / I Was a Preschool Dropout [1.8]Edit
- Jenny: THIS IS SO STUPID!!!
- (The kindergarteners gasp)
- Amber: She said the S-word!
- Alex: [crying]
- Ms. Binky: That’s a time-out, young lady. Come with me. I’m very disappointed in you Jennifer. You don’t belong here.
Hostile Makeover / Grid Iron Glory [1.9]Edit
- Jenny: So, Vexus. Ready to surrender?
- Vexus: So, you've dismantled a handful of my drones. But, we are legion! 1 day, soon, you will join us, and together, we will enslave the human race!
- Jenny: Think again, evil robot queen. Because as long as there's a human being alive that needs my help, I'll be there. When you see a little kid trying to outrun a cannibal android, I'll be there. When you see some working guy trying to get his change back from a demon possessed snack machine, I'll be there. And when the day come that crime-fighting robots and plain folks can live together in peace, laughing and hooting it up...
- Vexus: Yeah, yeah, yeah. I get it already. But your words are meaningless! You will be a member of the Cluster before you know it. Be seeing you.
- Jenny: What a... witch.
- Jenny: Well, Brad, thanks for making me look like a complete... [voice deepens] fool.
- Brad: Whoa.
- Jenny: [covering her mouth] Oh, no. Now my voice vo-coder is malfunctioning too! [baby laughs at her again; runs out of the restaurant grabbing a paper bag from the customer who was taking out his meal and falls to the floor; now sitting in an alley with the paper bag on her head, completely embarrassed] Great. I'll have to wear this bag on my head forever, and it smells like tacos.
- Brad: [walks up to her] Everyone goes through this, Jen. It's completely natural.
- [Nanobot changes Jenny's embarrassed mood to happiness on her mood-o-tron]
- Jenny: You're right. It's not so bad. Hey, maybe this bag thing will become a new fad: Fish taco bag heads.
- Brad: That's the spirit.
- [Nanobot changes Jenny's happy mood to anger]
- Jenny: This is all your fault! [holds Brad against the wall] You and your lousy cover-up!
- Brad: ♫ Someone's having mood swings. ♫
- [Nanobot changes Jenny's anger mood to sadness]
- Jenny: [crying] I'm sorry, sweet Brad. Please, forgive me!
- Brad: Don't sweet it, Jenn. Hey, I've bet you've already stared to clear up.
- Jenny: Really? You think so?
- Brad: Sure.
- Jenny: [takes the paper bag off her head, brad is surprised by her appearance] How do I look? [reveals her forehead has enlarged, armpit wires pop out of her armpits, she puts her arms down and they become bulkier, her stomach and chest grow larger, creeping Brad out, realizing she was transforming she is horrified] (gasps) I gotta go! [flees back home]
- Brad: What's your hurry, Sally? I-I mean, Jenny?
- Brad: My only battle today is between my urge to gorge on chocolate and my desire to be zit-free for school photos tomorrow.
- Nora: Young lady, you stop taking over the human race right now, or you are grounded!
- (during the football game)
- Jenny: Are we the only ones left?
- Brad: All that's left standing.
- Jenny: But, what about Dominelli?
- Brad: Broken scapula.
- Jenny: Thomas?
- Brad: They ripped his butt off.
- Jenny: Sanchez?
- Brad: Fractured toe.
- Jenny: Parkins?
- Brad: Inner-cranial dislocation.
- Jenny: Lopez?
- Brad: Real bad owwie.
- Jenny: Cruz?
- Brad: Comatose, but he wasn't much of a talker anyway.
Dressed To Kill / Shell Game [1.10]Edit
- Tiff: Whatever. You better find some inspiration and fast or we're gonna take our business elsewhere.
Daydream Believer [11a]Edit
- Jenny: [gushing] Oh my gosh, and then I enjoyed a glass of juice for the first time - orange juice! It tasted like apple! Then Don and I sat in a hot tub, and I didn't electrocute him!
- Brad: You know, Jenn, dreams are more fun to have than to hear about.
- Jenny: I can turn my dream off anytime I want to. I'm in total control.
- Brad: Is that why you've been jumping on desks and riding drinking fountains?
This Time with Feeling [11b]Edit
- Himcules: Now you’re laughing?! Laugh at this! [tosses the car at Jenny but it has no effect on her, she laughs again] Stop laughing at me!
- Jenny: [giggling] That tickles. [giggles more]
- Brad: Yeah, they are a little primitive, you'll probably feel better without 'em.
- Jenny: Yeah, you're right. [raises her arm up showing the last of her nerve ending, she touches it; and she laughs]
Saved by the Shell [12a]Edit
Tradeshow Showdown [12b]Edit
The Wonderful World of Wizzly [13a]Edit
- [after all the park robots have go wild]
- Tuck: Well, this is another fine mess you've gotten us into, Jennifer.
- Jenny: That was horrible!
- Brad: Okay, the waterfall was pretty weak. Just consider it a warm up for what's to come.
- Jenny: A warm up?
- Brad: Sure, ya gotta start somewhere.
- Tuck: And the rest of the rides only get better.
- Jenny: [upset] And do the rest of these rides make fools out of robots too?
- Brad: What are you talking about?
- Jenny: I'm talking about hydrolic surges forced into your hips to make them shake. Do you have any idea what that can do to a ball and socket joint?
- Brad: Come on, Jenny. It's all in good fun!
- Jenny: Yeah, fun for the humans! How'd you like to sing some stupid song over and over all day long?
Call Hating [13b]Edit
Robot For All Seasons [2.1]Edit
Future Shock / Humiliation 101 [2.2]Edit
- Jenny: Looks like I'll have to settle for Brad again.
- Brad: Settle? What's that supposed to mean?
- Jenny: I just…I just meant-
- Brad: Meant what? Brad's not datable? Brad's a loser? Brad couldn't get a date if he were rich, handsome and the last man on planet earth?
- Jenny: I just meant we could go together if I couldn't find anyone else.
- Brad: Don't you mean anyone better?
- Jenny: No, I-
- Brad: You must be pretty desperate.
- Jenny: Look who's talking. I heard Kiki dumped you for Don Prima.
- Brad: Hey, I dumped her!
- Jenny: Was that before or after you got down on your knees and begged her to go to the movie with you?
- Tuck: Juicy!
- Brad: Well, at least I have options. Anyway, who says I'd settle for you? I already have a date.
- Jenny: Oh, yeah?! Who?!
- Brad: That's for me to know and you never to find out. That is unless you find a date, which I doubt! [leaves while laughing]
- Jenny: [yelling out the window] I DEMAND to know the name of your date!
- Brad: Over my dead body!
- Jenny: Don't give me any ideas! [slams the window door closed]
Last Action Zero / Mind Over Matter [2.3]Edit
- Crater Critter: Since you ruined our favorite hotspot, it only seems fair that we get to eat your brain!
- Jenny: Uh, you wouldn't like my brain! It's all circuity and metallic!
- Crater Critter: Oh, good! We haven't been getting our recommended daily allowance of iron! [pulls out scalpel]
Love 'Em or Leash 'Em / Teen Team Time [2.4]Edit
Pajama Party Prankapalooza / Sister Sledgehammer [2.5]Edit
Dancing With My Shell / Around the World in Eighty Pieces [2.6]Edit
- (after trying to dance with the SilverShell as he runs back into the gym again)
- Jenny (XJ9): I've heard of playing hard to get, but hard to hang on to?!
- Brad: (while escaping in the mini-jet from a flock of flying animals) What is this place?!
- Sheldon: It's evolution gone mad!!
- (after discussing how to find Jenny's pieces)
- Tuck: Are you sure Dr. Wakeman will loan her mini-jet to a dwarf, two teens, and a disembodied head?
Armagedroid / Killgore [2.7]Edit
- (about all the people around)
- Jenny: Wow, Killgore. How many people did you tell about this?
- Killgore: Killgore has many adoring fans, that he shall destroy!!
A Pain In My Sidekick / Crash Pad Crash [2.8]Edit
Escape from Cluster Prime [2.9]Edit
- Vexus: I've tried everything! Missiles, drones, robots, nanobots, Smytus, Krakus, acne! Well, no more mister nice queen. If I can't bring you to the Cluster, I'll bring the Cluster to you!
Victim of Fashion [2.10]Edit
- Tiff: (about Jenny's transformations) Now she has fashion growing out of her floppy drive? How're we supposed to compete with that?
- Brit: Dont fret, Tiff. We've been the fashion divas of this school for too long.
- Sheldon: (to Jenny) But removing your weapons system? Are you sure that's such a good idea?
- Brad: Yeah, Jen. Sounds pretty risky.
- Jenny: (very certain) I don't care!!! It's better to be fashionable than functional. I want a slim-down look that will make Brit and Tiff look like stuffed sausages. Take it out! Take it all out!
Designing Women / Robot Riot [2.11]Edit
Bradventure / Mama Drama [2.12]Edit
Jenny: (facing Brad) I don't know how you did it but you came to my rescue and the bravery was 100% Brad,YOU'RE MY HERO! (Jenny and Brad hugged).
Toying with Jenny / Teenage Mutant Ninja Troubles [2.13]Edit
Teen Idol /Good Old Sheldon [2.14]Edit
- Old Man Sheldon: Jenny! [slowly walks towards Jenny and hits her on the with his cane] You ruined my life! [falls on his back]
- Jenny: Who are you, and what are you talking about?
- Old Man Sheldon: [sits up] I’m your old pal! Sheldon!
- Tuck: Crazy old person.
- Brad: Move away slowly.
- Old Man Sheldon: I’m Sheldon I tell ya! I just got me a few wrinkles since you abandoned me... [falls on his back again] 75 years ago!
- Brad: That’s crazy talk, pops.
- Jenny: We just saw Sheldon yesterday.
- Tuck: Yeah, hangin’ out with those freaky Jenny worshiping aliens.
- Old Man Sheldon: Those awful aliens. I remember it like it was yesterday.
- Tuck: It was yesterday, you old--
- Old Man Sheldon: [covers Tuck’s mouth with his hand] Hush, boy! I’m telling a story. When Jenny hurled those aliens into outer space on their ship, [Flashback begins] I was onboard. I tried to get 'em to turn around, but there was a bit of a communication gap. Catching a ride back was impossible. I had to find work to survive. I couldn’t keep up as a mechanic, couldn’t master beauty salon work, and couldn’t stomach the fast food industry.
- Brad: So, was everything okay with Sheldon?
- Jenny: Sheldon should be just fine.
- Sheldon: Jenny! How dare you let those pirates take me?! Who leaves a baby out in space with Space Pirates for 15 years?!
- Jenny: It was the only way to get you back to the correct age. Now, I'm glad everything's back to normal.
- Sheldon: Normal?! I've just spent 90 years of my life in outer space! And you call that normal?! I will never forgive you!