Kick Buttowski: Suburban Daredevil

Kick Buttowski: Suburban Daredevil (often referred to as simply Kick Buttowski) is an American animated television series, airing on Disney XD in 2010, about a young boy named Clarence "Kick" Buttowski, who aspires to become the world's greatest daredevil.

Season 1

Dead Man's Drop / Stumped [1.1]

Kick: Fail? I don't do "fail"!

---

Gunther: [removing the thorns from Kick's buttocks] Stop moving. This is delicate butt surgery.

Kick: The guy on TV said carefully!

Gunther: Do you want me to get the thorns out or not?

Kick: Okay, do another. Go ahead. Do it. Do it! [screams painfully] WHY'D YOU DO IT?!

If Books Could Kill / There Will Be Nacho [1.2]

Librarian:Everything in the library belongs to me, including you! [laughs evily]

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Kick: She's good, but I'm better.

Dancing with the Enemy / Tattler's Tale [1.18]

Jackie: [angrily through gritted teeth when Mr. Vickle pairs Kick with Kendall] Kick should be holding my hand! [crunches Gunther's hand, tightly]

Gunther: [painfully] Ow! You're hurting me! [to Kick as Jackie drags him away] Kick, help!

Mr. Vickle: Everyone, listen up. Each duo will choreograph their own routine for a dance-off.

Kick: [coldly] Get your girly paws off me.

Kendall: You're the one with the girly hands. I am so not dancing with you.

Kick: I'm not dancing with you.

Kendall: I'd rather spend a day in detention than dance with you.

Kick: I'd rather punch myself in the face than dance with you.

Kendall: I'd like to see that.

Kick: Maybe someday you will.

Kendall: Good, then we agree.

Kick: Yes, surprisingly.

Both: But I'm still not dancing with you.

Mr. Vickle: If you don't want to dance, then you fail.

Both: [shocked] Fail?!

Kendall: I can't fail gym!

Kick: Kick Buttowski does not fail.

---

Honey: Now, I want you two to behave while we're at the pageant.

Brad: Certainly, mother.

Honey: You've been getting in far too much trouble lately.

Kick: That's in the past, Mom.

Brad: We're quite fond of each other. [he and Kick hug]

Honey: Mm-hmm. I'll be back in three hours.

---

[Kick and Brad are talking to each other through mirrors while being grounded in their rooms for fighting]

Brad: [annoyed] This is all your fault, dill weed! Mom busted us again because of you!

Kick: She's good, but she's not this good.

Brad: Well, she's catching us somehow.

Kick: Yes, somehow. I think we've got a tattler in our midst.

[Later… their punishment time is up and Honey releases them from their rooms]

Honey: Okay, boys. Punishment is over. Out of your rooms and outside now. [opens the front door, pushing Kick outside] And don't get into any more trouble. [sternly] I mean it, Kick.

Ms. Chicarelli: Hello, Mrs. Buttowski.

Kick: Wait a minute. That silhouette, so familiar. Ms. Chicarelli. It was you! You're the one snitching on me.

Ms. Chicarelli: That's right. It's my responsibility to keep the cul-de-sac safe from the likes of you, troublemaker!

Kick: We were just having fun.

Ms. Chicarelli: You were loud and out of control! Kids are the worst thing to ever happen to the suburbs… [savagely] MY SUBURBS! It used to be so quiet around here, until all of your brats moved in! [turns to Mr. Vickle] That goes for you too, Mr. Vickle! You stop cutting those bushes so loudly! [back to Kick; threateningly, as he scowls at her] And the next time you disrupt even one blade of grass on this cul-de-sac, you'll be serving a lifetime of grounding.

Honey: [kindly] Don't worry, Ms. Chicarelli. Kick will be on his best behavior. [to Kick; darkly] Right, Kick?

Kick: [through gritted teeth in irritation] Yes, Mom.

---

Kick: [pacing back and forth outside of Ms. Chicarelli's house; to Brad] She's gotta be stopped! I'm getting busted all over the place.

Brad: Yeah, I guess we better stay as far away from her as possible. [naughtily swipes his brother's skateboard and throws it into Ms. Chicarelli's front yard]

Kick: Chicarelli's yard?! Nothing ever comes back from Chicarelli's yard!

---

Ms. Chicarelli: [breaking down over seeing Kick causing too much chaos all over the cul-de-sac] What's going on? [shows up at the Buttowski residence and knocks on the door]

Honey: [answers] Yes? Uh, Ms. Chicarelli.

Ms. Chicarelli: [overreacting and freaking out] Mrs. Buttowski, at this very moment, that boy of yours is disturbing the peace and ruining the sanctity of the entire neighborhood, and he's breaking trash cans, and buzzing around, crashing into things and wasting water! He's...that boy is driving me crazy, and he should be grounded because of his menacing, and he's...and he's... [sees Kick appearing behind his mother] HE'S RIGHT THERE!

Kick: Hey, Mom. I'm done cleaning my room. Can I go outside and play now? Why, hello there, Ms. Chicarelli. Very nice to see you out and about.

Ms. Chicarelli: No... no!

Honey: Well, as you can see, Kick is here, at home, helping out.

Morning Rush / Fistful of Ice Cream [1.19]

[Mr. Vickle, Ms. Chicarelli, and the Magnusons are all in the backyard of the Buttowski residence, sweating from the heat on the hottest day of the year to celebrate Harold's birthday party until he gets home from work]

Mr. Vickle: Poor Mrs. Buttowski. She picked the hottest day in Mellowbrook history to throw her husband's surprise birthday party. [cut to Kick relaxing on a lounge chair, non-sweating] And Kick doesn't sweat one drop. How did you do it?

Kick: It pays to keep a cool head.

Gunther: What does that even mean?

Honey: Don't worry, everyone. Ice cream's on the way. Cowboy Kelly ice cream bars. Harold has loved them since he was a little baby and ate one every day. He even shared one on our first date… uh, sort of.

Mr. Vickle: They don't make those anymore.

Honey: I know, but there was one box left in deep freeze.

Mr. Vickle: [relieved] Party saved.

Honey: [answers her phone as it rings] Hello? [gasps in horrified shock] The truck broke down! NO COWBOY KELLY BARS!

Mr. Vickle: [dismayed] Party unsaved.

Kick: I guess that's my cue. Time to save the party.

Gunther: [unsure] I don't know, Kick. Remember last time you tried to "save" the party?

Kick: Not this time, Gunther. We're hoping to find that truck, get those Cowboy Kelly bars, and save Dad's birthday party.

Brad: In your dreams, dill weed. This time, the Brad saves Dad's birthday party.

---

Kick: Hang on! We're going underground!

Gunther: I'm afraid of the dark, and giraffes, but that last one doesn't apply!

---

Gunther: [opens the box, revealing all the Cowboy Kelly ice cream bars completely melted] I can't believe it! They're all melted!

Kick: [takes out one from his helmet] All but one.

Harold: Ah. I... I can hardly believe it.

Honey: Oh, Kick, you saved your father's birthday party.

Harold: How did you keep it from melting?

Kick: It pays to keep a cool head.

Gunther: Oh, now I know what that means.

Brad: [entering the backyard] Party people, prepare to be saved!

Season 2

Sister Pact / Shh! [2.15]

Kick: I'll just be inside this desk.

[An explosion suddenly goes off]

Ms. Fitzpatrick: Okay. You get an "A". And extra credit to anyone who can find my spleen.

Poll Position / Jock Wilder's Nature Camp [2.20]

Jackie: Sorry you didn't win the election, Kendall.

Kendall: Sorry you didn't get to sew your face to Kick's.

Jackie: I guess there's always next year, right?

Kendall: [threateningly in annoyance] If you run next year, I'll sew your face to the floor.

Cast

• Charlie Schlatter – Clarence "Kick" Buttowski
• Matt Jones – Gunther Magnuson
• Danny Cooksey – Bradley "Brad" Buttowski
• Grey Griffin – Brianna Buttowski
• Brian Stepanek – Harold Buttowski
• Kari Wahlgren – Honey Buttowski
• John DiMaggio – Mr. Vickle
• Emily Osment – Kendall Perkins
• Maria Bamford – "Wacky" Jackie Wackerman
• Eric Christian Olsen – Wade
• Richard Horvitz – Mouth
• Greg Cipes – Emo Kid
• Mindy Sterling – Ms. Chicarelli
• Roz Ryan – Ms. Fitzpatrick
• Henry Winkler – Principal Henry
• Veronica Cartwright – Ms. Dominic