Hotel Hell is a Reality TV Series on FOX. Chef Gordon Ramsay visits failing hotels, inns and Bed and Breakfasts across the country. It aired its first episode on August 13, 2012.
Juniper Hill Inn, Part One [1.01]Edit
Juniper Hill Inn, Part Two [1.02]Edit
- [Gordon has found out that Robert has been giving away free complimentary rooms and food]
- Robert: The reason that I did that was that because, I thought they'd tip my staff.
- Gordon: But they didn't tip your staff. Sorry to (bleep) on your bonfire.
- Robert: Well then, I will call my friends and tell them "Look, what happened?"
- Gordon: You haven't got the (bleep) balls to call your friends and ask them to leave a tip.
- Robert: Yes I do.
- Gordon: Call them then!
- [Robert calls Dana on his phone]
- Gordon: And ask them that I thought out of generosity you would at least leave a couple hundred dollars tip for the team.
- Dana: Hello?
- Robert: Dana.
- Dana: Yes?
- Robert: It's Robert. You stayed here recently and I was under the impression that you and Greg left a tip. Did you leave a tip?
- Dana: Well, I left the money with you.
- Robert: No, no, no. But you said you were going to send additional tip.
- Gordon: I think my time's done here.
- Robert: That was one of the things that I was hoping you had done.
- Dana: If I didn't do what I was supposed to do, I'm very sorry.
- Gordon: [walks out of the RV in disgust] "I left the money with you."
- Robert: Wait a minute, there's others to call too. Gordon!
- Gordon: Oh, (bleep)!
- Robert: Gordon has left. He thinks I'm stealing my staff's tips.
- Gordon: Unbelieveable. (Bleep).
- Robert: [Calling Ari on the phone] Hey Ari, it's Robert. Did you tip the staff because they're telling people that they haven't been tipped.
- Gordon: [Walking to his car] "I left the money with you."
- Robert: Oh, so I need to do that. I somehow lost that.
- Gordon: (Bleep) idiot.
- Robert: (interview) Gordon left thinking that I am a liar. I feel as if I'm at the end of my rope and I'm going to lose everything. I'll have to start all over again if this doesn't work. It just doesn't seem I can do it anymore. I know I can't do it.
- Gordon: I can't believe those storage units are still there. If I was Robert, I'd lock Ari in one of them.
Cambridge Hotel [1.03]Edit
Keating Hotel [1.04]Edit
River Rock Inn [1.05]Edit
Roosevelt Hotel [1.06]Edit
- [Gordon walks into the kitchen after John served him a raw soft boiled egg.]
- John: Fire away buddy.
- Gordon: Are you having a laugh at your family's expense?
- John: No.
- Gordon: Big tall hat, big jacket and you can't boil a (bleep) egg.
- John: You want a fried egg? You want French toast too? How about some pancakes?
- Gordon: What the (bleep) are you doing? You don't care, do you?
- John: I do care.
- Gordon: You're a (bleep) joke.
- John: (interview) Those are what we refer to as fighting words. Gutsy thing to do. Especially in a kitchen full of sharp knives.
- John: It has never been a joke for me. Ever.
- Gordon: "Come play at my school. I'm the head master!" You're acting like an absolute idiot.
Meson De Mesilla [2.01]Edit
Monticello Hotel [2.02]Edit
Applegate River Lodge [2.03]Edit
- Gordon: Uh...so, are you making money here?
- Dusty: Yes sir.
- Gordon: How much money do you make a month?
- Dusty: Last month, I made about $12,000.
- Gordon: Wow. So you make $150 grand a year.
- Dusty: With everything working right, yeah.
- Gordon: And you don't pay a dollar profit to your mother.
- Dusty: Profit? Excuse me?
- Gordon: The business is a million dollars in debt, you make a (bleep)load of money, and your mom gets nothing.
- Joanna: (interview) I was shocked that Dusty makes that much and that bothers me because he should help me out financially.
- Gordon: Knowing full well that you stand to inherit this business, there's still not a penny going in to reducing debt and this is your mother!
- Dusty: Correct. (interview) I really devoted my life to this place and to be treated like I don't care about my family and I don't care about this business, it really cut to the core and I have no problem telling him to get the (bleep) out of here.
- Gordon: I'd give you a kick up the arse if that was my son.
- Gordon: I'm embarrassed. I'm amazed you're still open. There's no (bleep) standards in here.
- Dusty: I don't believe that there are no standards.
- Gordon: You've got a river running outside your patio with salmon in it and you're serving frozen salmon! Where's the standard then?
- Dusty: What we do is not (bleep).
- Gordon: You may be able to manipulate your mother. But you're not going to pull the wool over my eyes. Because you're playing at running a restaurant that's been given to you and you don't actually work for this. You grew up here so, "Hey mom, I want to be a restaurateur this week!" Without your mother in this lodge, you're (bleep)!
Hotel Chester [2.04]Edit
Calumet Inn [2.05]Edit
- Gordon: I feel like a Goonie. "HEY, YOU GUYS!!"
- [Mandy has walked out of the inn frustrated over the owners' inability to run the place]
- Gordon: Our general manager has just walked out.
- Rina: You know, the funny thing is--
- Gordon: No, no. This isn't funny. That girl dedicated her life into keeping you in a hotel. Have you ever employed one member of staff?
- Jennifer: Like, she even worked a day in her life.
- Wanda: How can you say that, Jennifer?
- Jennifer: If you were here for two seconds! I've been running my ass off the whole (bleep) day!!
- Rina: You guys don't see me do those things. I do them but you don't see it! You don't know the life I live. You have no clue. [more arguing by the staff]
- Gordon: (Bleep) sake! One of you step up! If you were my daughters, I'd kick you out! (Wanda smirks) You can laugh all you (bleep) want. I'm not your father but what I do know is, you don't (bleep) deserve this! Thank you for the first meeting in nine months.
- Rina: (interview) I thought Gordon was going to be nice to me!
- Gordon: (walking back to his room) That was extraordinary. The only person who actually cared about this place, Mandy the general manager has gone. Those daughters are absolutely screwed.
Four Seasons Inn [2.06]Edit
Curtis House [2.07]Edit
Murphys Hotel [2.08]Edit