Elves is a 1989 film about a young woman who discovers that she is the focus of an evil Nazi experiment involving selective breeding and summoned elves, an attempt to create a race of supermen. She and two of her friends are trapped in a department store with an elf, and only the renegade loose-cannon Santa Claus, can save them.
- Directed and written by Jeffrey Mandel.
- My cat is the only friend I have left.
- I need to know the connection between the elves and the Nazis!
- Dead Santa: [whispers] Santa said ORAL.
- Kirsten: [after catching her brother spying on her] I'm your fucking sister.
- Willy: Yeah, you've got fucking big tits and I'm going to tell everybody I saw them.
- Kirsten's Mother: Your father's in the study.
- Kirsten: What? No. Grandfather's in the study. Dad is dead.
- Kirsten's Mother: Your grandfather is your grandfather AND your father!
- Willy: Is everything all right?
- Kirsten: No, Willy, Gramps is a Nazi.
- Kirsten's Mother: You look terrible.
- Kirsten: Yeah, well, I had a rough day at work... Santa got murdered.