DuckTales (1987 TV series)

DuckTales (1987–1990) is an animated series produced by The Walt Disney Company based on Carl Barks' Uncle Scrooge comic book series about the adventures of Scrooge McDuck and his three grandnephews, Huey, Dewey, and Louie.

Season 1

Treasure of the Golden Suns [1.1–5]

Part I: Don't Give Up The Ship

Donald: Now, while I'm in the Navy, boys, you mind your Uncle Scrooge.

Huey: But he's so cheap!

Donald: Yeah. But he's family. Okay, Huey?

Huey: Yes, Uncle Donald.

Donald: No back talk, Dewey.

Dewey: No, Uncle Donald.

Donald: Louie, be good. And no spitballs.

Louie: Uh, yes and no, Uncle Donald.

Donald: Oh, and one more thing. Gimmie a hug!

[The nephews do so.]

Huey: Oh, we're really gonna miss you, Uncle Donald!

Donald: Aw. And I'm gonna miss you too.

---

Scrooge: Donald, you can't be serious about this crazy idea. There's no profit in it.

Donald: But I've already enlisted, Uncle Scrooge. I wanna see the world!

Scrooge: So I'll buy you a globe.

---

[The Beagle Boys have followed the nephews to Scrooge's candy factory]

Scrooge: You boys get out of here. I'll handle this.

Huey: [turning and saluting] No sir, Uncle Scrooge!

Dewey: [saluting] We're all in this...

Louie: [saluting] ...together!

Scrooge: Good lads!

Part II: Wronguay in Ronguay

Flintheart Glomgold: [answering the phone] Money talks, I listen. Speak!

---

[Surprising each other while searching for the treasure ship]

Glomgold: Scrooge!

Scrooge: Glomgold!

El Capitan: Los ninos!

Huey, Dewey and Louie: That guy!

Part III: 3 Ducks of the Condor

Launchpad: Big rubble, no trouble! Gyro tells me you need a pilot for an experimental plane.

Scrooge: What I need is my head examined.

Launchpad: Don't worry, Mr. McD. If it's got wings, I can crash it.

Scrooge: I hope my medical insurance is paid up.

---

Launchpad: Well, the engines are busted, but those condors gave me an idea! Trouble is...I don't know how to get 'er off the ground.

Donald: You leave that to me!

Launchpad: Great! You handle the takeoff!

Donald: Okay!

Launchpad: Things must be worse than I thought...I'm beginning to understand him!

Part IV: Cold Duck

Dewey: Be very very quiet. We're hunting Beakley.

---

Louie: [about girls] Webby's making friends with penguins while Uncle Scrooge is lost in the snow.

Mrs. Beakley: You know, we could backtrack the walrus' trail and find your uncle.

Louie: Er...yeah! We were just gonna say that!

Dewey: [to Huey] They must get smarter as they get older.

Part V: Too Much Of A Gold Thing

[After crashing the carrier into a river]

Dewey: We're caught in the current!

Scrooge: Looks like your runway is running away with us. Let's get back into the sky!

Launchpad: Don't worry. When the going gets tough, the harder they fall.

---

Webby: Gee! An escalator!

Mrs. Beakley: No, dear. This is an older model. We have to walk up these.

Send in the Clones [1.6]

Bigtime: Thanks for sneakin' us outta jail, Magica. We was gettin' bored waitin' for our time to run out!

Magica: How long was your sentence?

Bigtime: Life.

---

Scrooge: I didn't get rich by being stupid.

Sphinx for the Memories [1.7]

Donald: Nobody's going to make a king out of me and get away with it!

---

Louie: What are they doing to Unca Donald?

Scrooge: Whatever it is, it will be an improvement.

Where No Duck Has Gone Before [1.8]

Huey: Unca Scrooge, what's wrong?

Scrooge: Those movie people called.

Huey: That's good.

Scrooge: But they can't repay me in cash.

Louie: That's bad.

Scrooge: So instead they're giving me Duckburg Studios.

Huey, Dewey, Louie and Doofus: That's GREAT!

---

Scrooge: If Duckburg studios is going to survive, Major Courage is going to need a major overhaul.

Major Courage: Uh... How major?

Scrooge: Major major, Major.

---

[The Phoenix "set" takes off through the roof of the studio.]

Scrooge: What did you do?

Gyro Gearloose: Well, you said, "make it as real as I could," so I did.

---

Launchpad: Real heroes don't need cameras, they just do what needs to be done.

---

Scrooge: Hurry! We've got to warn them!

[in a fury, he smashes the instrument panel with his cane]

Scrooge: What's the matter? Don't we have a radio?!

Gyro Gearloose: Well, yes... and no.

---

Scrooge: I'm warning you, Courage! Turn that ship around and get my nephews, or you'll never work in this town again!

Major Courage: Forget it, McDuck! Remember, I've got a five-year contract.

Scrooge: YOU...! YOU...!

[he raises his cane, Gyro grabs it]

Gyro Gearloose: Not the radio!

---

[The Cronk ship closes in on the Phoenix.]

Scrooge: There goes the picture again!

Gyro Gearloose: Please, allow me.

[He takes Scrooge's cane and smashes the radio.]

Armstrong [1.9]

Scrooge: You know what I like about gold? I have a lot of it!

---

Armstrong: I am Armstrong. I am your friend.

---

Scrooge: Why no marshmallows in my hot chocolate?

Duckworth: [clears throat] It's inefficient, sir.

Scrooge: Efficiency has its place but NOT in my hot chocolate.

---

Scrooge: No battery-operated tin can dictator is going to stop me!

[gets shocked]

Gyro Gearloose: Nothing can stop him!

Robot Robbers [1.10]

Scrooge: [About newspapers] I just love looking through the Business section. My name's on every page.

---

Bankjob: We gotta get out of here!

Beagle Boys: YEAH!

Bankjob: We gotta get out of here!

Beagle Boys: YEAH!

Bankjob: We gotta get out of here and into Scrooge's money bin!

Beagle Boys: YEAH, YEAH, YEAH!

---

Glomgold: I have to rebuild half the city, and I can't use my robots!

Scrooge: McDuck Construction will be glad to handle the job for you.

Glomgold: How much will that cost?!

Scrooge: How much you got?

Glomgold: Scrooge McDuck, you're a low-down ruthless rat!

Scrooge: What can I say, Flintheart? You bring out the best in me.

Magica's Shadow War [1.11]

Huey: It's a shadow thief!

Scrooge: After him! Er.. her! Er.. it!

---

Poe: Shadow took over, locked Magica in a closet! Free her!

Scrooge: Free that-that-that WITCH?! Never! It serves her right! She can stay locked in 'til Doomsday and it would be just ducky with me.

Huey: But if she gets rid of that shadow...

Dewey: We can't keep these lights on forever.

Louie: Think of the electric bill.

Scrooge: You have a point. Okay, let's go.

Master of the Djinni [1.12]

Scrooge: Still a cheater, eh, Glomgold?

Glomgold: I look at it this way: Why not?

---

[To Scrooge and Glomgold, disguised as harem girls.]

Sultan: How did two camel humps like you become part of the finest harem in the land?

Scrooge: 2-for-1 sale?

---

Shawebizad: [after telling a long story] Hurry! They're asleep!

Scrooge: [sarcastic] Oh, I can't imagine why.

Hotel Strangeduck [1.13]

Louie: It sure is dark in here.

Huey: I wonder where the light switch is.

Louie: Hey, I found a candle!

Dewey: Anybody got a match? [The "ghost" lights it for them.]

Louie: T-t-thank you. Now we know which way to run.

Huey, Dewey and Louie: YAAAAH!

---

[Scrooge and the boys walk down a secret staircase to the basement]

Huey: Wonder where this goes.

Scrooge: Looks like it goes around the corner. [they go through a tunnel and the fire touches his fingers; yelps as the light goes out] Curse me kilts! That was my last one!

Dewey: Hey. What's this? [pulls a string and turns on a lightbulb]

Louie: Looks like a lightbulb.

Scrooge: Good work, lads.

---

Huey: Hey, why would a ghost need to use a door?

Dewey: Is that a riddle or a knock-knock joke?

The Lost Crown of Genghis Khan [1.14]

Webby: You're so smart, Uncle Scrooge.

Scrooge: Thanks, darling. And wasn't it smart of you to notice?

---

Launchpad: You guys gotta think positive!

Huey: But, Launchpad, Webby's lost, Unca Scrooge is lost, we're lost...

Louie: ...and there's a monster in these caves trying to get 'em.

Launchpad: C'mon! There must be something positive about all this.

Dewey: If we don't keep moving, we're going to freeze to death.

Launchpad: There you go!... You gotta keep a stiff upper lip, Louie.

Louie: That's easy. It's frozen.

Duckman of Aquatraz [1.15]

Dewey: Look! We know Unca Scrooge didn't steal that painting, right?

Louie: Yeah! He only likes little paintings of presidents. The ones on dollar bills.

---

Mr. Oink: That is enough, Mr. McDuck?!

---

[Scrooge is arm-wrestling the other inmates in quick succession]

Scrooge: [wins] Next. [wins] Next. [wins] Next.

Mad Dog McGurk: [rubbing his hand] How'd you get so strong, McDuck?

Scrooge: By lifting moneybags.

Prisoner: I lifted some moneybags once... right before they threw me in here.

The Money Vanishes [1.16]

Scrooge: Until tomorrow, my beautiful cash. Good night, sleep tight and don't let inflation bite.

---

Bigtime: It'll take a whole night of back-breaking work, aching muscles, dirt and sweat. [Passes the shovel to his brothers] You guys better get started.

---

Dewey: Go ahead, Beagle Boys, take my ray!

Sir Gyro de Gearloose [1.17]

Dewey: I think we came at a bad time.

Gyro: Hi, boys. What can I do for you three?

Louie: Uh… Nothing, Gyro. We just came by to say hi. [he and Dewey glare at Huey]

Huey: Yeah. Hi!

---

Moorloon: [tapping a magnet against a wooden table] Work, work, work!

Hero for Hire [1.19]

Launchpad: [talking to Doofus during a ransom call] Did they hurt you?

Doofus: [crying] They tortured me, Launchpad! They ate my pancakes!

Launchpad: [under his breath] Those rats!

---

[Launchpad decides not to tell the police anything after receiving a threatening phone call from the Beagle Boys]

Judge: Now what were you here about, son?

Launchpad: [quickly and nervously] I just wanted to tell you a joke: I knew a burglar who was so successful, he stopped makin' house calls. A yuk-yuk. [hurries away]

Judge: Yuck is right.

---

Launchpad: [to Ma Beagle] I'm lookin' for my friend Doofus, chubby little kid, about the size of this lamp. [motions to Doofus, who is tied up with a lampshade on his head]

---

Babyface: [after he, Bankjob, and Bugle go flying out of Ma Beagle's car and into a paddy wagon] See what happens when you don't wear your seat belts?

---

Launchpad: Surprise, Mr. McD!

Scrooge: [happily] Launchpad, you're alive! [raises his cane] I'M GOIN' TA KILL YOU!

Maid of the Myth [1.21]

Viking 1: Feeding the prisoners to the sharks isn't any fun.

Viking 2: It is for the sharks!

Pearl of Wisdom [1.25]

Yardarm: [to Sharky] A plan worthy of a master criminal — all you're missing is a little diabolical laughter.

Earth Quack [1.29]

Webby: Uncle Scrooge?

Scrooge: [waking up from his nightmare] Huh? What?

Webby: You were having a nightmare in the middle of the day!

Scrooge: Aye! And what a horrible, uh, daymare it was, darling.

Huey: What were you dreaming about, Uncle Scrooge?

Scrooge: Earthquakes. There was another one yesterday.

Dewey: But none of them were anywhere near Duckburg.

Scrooge: They were in my dream, under my money bin, to be exact.

Webby: Aw, dreams don't mean anything, Uncle Scrooge, unless they come true.

Scrooge: Aye, and that's why I have Gyro Gearloose dreaming up some safety measures.

Home Sweet Homer [1.30]

Scrooge: Your Uncle Donald's done something right for a change. By accident, of course.

---

Sirens: [chanting] Pennies, nickels, quarters, dimes, come to us while there's still time. Golden ducky ever bold, look into our eyes of gold.

Micro Ducks from Outer Space [1.32]

Commander: [giving him massive jewels] Is it a deal, Mr. McDuck?

Scrooge: It's a deal.

---

Scrooge: [Giving a sugar cube to Twitchy] Here you go, Twitchy. It will be our little secret.

Catch as Cash Can [1.36–39]

Part I: A Drain On The Economy

[referring to Glomgold's way of bailing the Beagles out of prison]

Bouncer: Ain't it a little early for Thanksgiving?

---

Louie: [on Scrooge] I think those Beagle Boys have finally driven him nutso.

Dewey: Knock it off! Uncle Scrooge is perfectly sane!

Scrooge McDuck: [singsong] Yoo-hoo! Laddies! I've something to show you!

[They enter the bin, and see Scrooge has rigged a giant artillery cannon to the door.]

Dewey: Right, no mental problems here.

---

Scrooge McDuck: [going crazy] No, no! Beagle Boys! Hide money! Win contests! Pretty fruit!

Dewey: Snap out of it, Uncle Scrooge! We need you! [throws a wad of cash at Scrooge's head]

Scrooge McDuck: Thanks, Dewey. I needed that.

Dewey: You're all right!

Scrooge McDuck: Yes, and I've figured out how to save my money from the Beagle Boys!

Huey, Dewey, and Louie: You do?

Scrooge McDuck: Yes! I'll give it to them!

Huey, Dewey, and Louie: Say what?

Part II: A Whale Of A Bad Time

Scrooge: [upon hearing that one of his cargo boats has vanished] A sea monster ate my ice cream! [he continues to shout this again and again as he flails crazily on the breakfast table]

Mrs. Beakley: That must've been some ice cream.

Huey: [holding down Scrooge] No, you don't understand! This wasn't ice cream! This was half his fortune!

---

Security guard: I don't care if you're Frosty the Snowman's sisters. Mr. McDuck left explicit instructions for nobody to be let in, and that means you nobodies, too!

Part III: Aqua Ducks

Scrooge McDuck: Morons. I've got morons on my team.

---

[The ducks are imprisoned in an undersea city.]

Launchpad McQuack: Say, why don't we find ourselves some spoons and dig our way out of here?

Scrooge: Launchpad, how did you ever manage to survive childhood?

Part IV: Working For Scales

Scrooge: They didna pop! The balloons didna pop!

Gyro Gearloose: Steel velvet.

Scrooge: Gyro! Sometimes I'm almost tempted to give you a raise!

Gyro: Why, thanks, Mr. McDuck...! I think.

---

Scrooge: Oh, no! Oh, no! Oh, no!

Flintheart Glomgold: Oh, yes! Oh, yes! Oh, yes!

Merit-Time Adventure [1.40]

Captain Mallard: My first mate Quackerbill was swallowed alive, which means he no longer is. You all sailed with good old Quackerbill! Remember what he always used to say?

Entire Room: ARRR...

Captain Mallard: Besides that!

The Golden Fleecing [1.41]

Scrooge: [About Launchpad] It's no wonder he doesn't wear a crash helmet. What's to protect?

---

Triplets: Don't worry. Launchpad taught us everything he knows about flying.

Scrooge: Now I'm worried.

Time Teasers [1.43]

[Huey restarts time after thwarting the robbery]

Babyface: Hey, the money!

[the officer gets up and starts blasting his pistol at the Beagle Boys]

Bankjob: Wha-?! How'd he get loose?! Eh, take this copper!

[but instead of the pistol, he has a hot dog, which splatters out of his hand]

Babyface: Huh?!

Bankjob: Let's get out of here!

[the Beagle boys trip and fall over due to their shoes being tied together]

Babyface: Yow!

Bankjob: Oof!

Babyface: What the..!

Bankjob: Aah!

[they squirm towards their car while the officer continues firing at them]

Louie: Gee, they got away.

Huey: Well, at least we stopped the robbery.

---

Bankjob: You broke it, you dimwit!

---

[after Scrooge explains their plan]

Bankjob: Hey! How come we gotta be the ones to stay behind and keep 'em busy?

Scrooge: Because you're too stupid to hook up Gyro's time tub!

Bankjob: All right, all right, just asking.

Raiders of the Lost Harp [1.45]

Magica: "Open!" says me.

---

Magica: Give key to me or... [she turns into a sumo wrestler] I give big headache to you!

Scroogerello [1.47]

Scrooge: And to show his appreciation, old Scrooge McDuck is taking you all out to the finest hamburger stand in Duckburg!

Webby: Can we order fries?

Scrooge: You can even order hamburgers!

Double-O-Duck [1.48]

[repeated lines]

DIA Director: Lunchpail...

Launchpad McQuack: Launch-pad!

DIA Director: Whatever.

Luck O' the Ducks [1.49]

[After Webby reveals the booby-trap that would have buried Scrooge alive.]

Scrooge: I... Webigail, I don't know what to say.

Launchpad: I know what you're trying to say, Mr. McDee. She was right, you were wrong. She was wise, you were a fool. [ticking off on his fingers] You were greedy, selfish, rude, a great big mean...

Scrooge: We get the idea, Launchpad!

Duckworth's Revolt [1.50]

Scrooge: [about re-hiring Duckworth] All in favor, say "yea!"

Huey, Dewey, & Louie: YAY!

Scrooge: The "yays" have it!

Magica's Magic Mirror / Take Me Out of the Ball Game [1.51]

Launchpad: I can't break their little hearts, Mr. McDee — you do it!

Duck in the Iron Mask [1.56]

Scrooge: Easier than diving into my money bin!

Launchpad: Really? You gotta let me try that some time, Mr. McD.

Scrooge: No!

Launchpad: Right!

The Uncrashable Hindentanic [1.57]

Scrooge: [to Glomgold] Let's just say I'll invest a million in your company if I lose, and you invest a million in my company when I win.

---

Director: McDuck, if we crash, we'll sue you for-!

Carl Sagander: Billions and billions of dollars!

The Status Seekers [1.58]

Scrooge: [on being told that a ballroom is only for "important" people] Well, I don't know about status, but I own this hotel.

Nothing to Fear [1.59]

Mrs. Quackenbush: Oh, boys! Aren't you forgetting something?

Dewey: Our teacher, Mrs. Quackenbush!

Mrs. Quackenbush: You didn't do your homework, boys- and you know how I hate that!

[the nephews scream]

Louie: Whose idea was it not to do our homework?

Huey and Dewey: Yours!

Louie: Whose idea was it to listen to my idea?

---

Scrooge: Ahh, I knew it. I *knew* it. I was never cut out to raise three boys. I've failed.

[covers his face and sobs]

Huey, Dewey, Louie: [come out shouldering sacks on poles] Uncle Scrooge?

Scrooge: Lads?

Louie Duck: We're leavin, Uncle Scrooge. Jus tlike you wanted.

Scrooge: Leavin'?

Huey: Yeah. You still wanna get rid of us, don't'cha?

Scrooge: Get rid of ya? Why, of *course* not. You're the apples o'my eye. I - I-I thought you wanted to get rid of *me*. You said I was an old fuddy-duddy...

[looks away]

Dewey: We'd *never* say that, Uncle Scrooge.

[they run to each other and hug]

Scrooge: Why - Why, of *course* you wouldn't.

---

Doofus: I was afraid you were a big banana!

Huey: Or Commander Gander, terror of the universe!

Duckworth: [sticks his head out of the closet] Or the limo-monster.

Scrooge: [examining himself] Not last time I checked... Nope. I'm just a plain old filthy-rich duck who wants to know... WHAT'S GOIN' ON AROUND HERE?

---

Dewey: It's almost as if someone knows what our worst fears are and is using them against us.

Huey: But who would know that much about us?

[The door swings open, and evil version of Uncle Scrooge stands before them]

Nephews: Uncle Scrooge!

Evil Scrooge: Figured it out, did ya?! Well, my worst fears came true when I got YOU three little television-leaver-oners! I never wanted you here, but that no-good Donald dumped you on me. [tosses and breaks Donald's picture scaring the nephews] I've been doing all this to scare you out of my life!

Louie: B-but how could you do all those things?

Evil Scrooge: I'm rich! I can do anything! [laughs evilly] And I'll be ever richer when you're out of here!

Nephews: [crying] Uncle Scrooge!

Evil Scrooge: Don't call me that! I don't want to be your uncle anymore! [leaves]

Once Upon a Dime [1.61]

Scrooge: I learned the hard way that the bottom is where you start in life.

---

Scrooge: It was my first job, and I’ve never worked so hard in my life. Finally, I finished, and from the shine in his boots, I could see how tired I was. But it was worth it when he gave me this, my Number One Dime.

Spies in Their Eyes [1.62]

Seaman: What are your orders, admiral?

Admiral Grimitz: Somebody do something!

Till Nephews Do Us Part [1.65]

Webby: If Millionara offered me an apple in the forest, I sure wouldn't eat it!

---

Goldie: You say "I do", and I'll show you the breeze of my shotgun!

---

Goldie: You no-good varmint! I'll teach ya to lay eyes on another woman!

---

Launchpad: Oops! That darn eject button is always getting in the way!

Season 2

Time is Money [2.1-5]

Part II: The Duck Who Would Be King

Launchpad: Gee, she's nice. Do you think I made an impression?

Huey: What? When you knocked over the statue, or when you ran into the door?

Launchpad: All three.

---

Townspeople: THE GREAT ONE HAS CHOSEN! ALL HAIL SKOOGE!

Scrooge: That's Scrooge!

Townspeople: WHATEVER.

---

Bubba: Skooge home?

Scrooge: No, Bubba, no home. Och, I'm starting to talk like him. Launchpad, how soon can we get back in the air?

Launchpad: It's in pretty deep, Mr. McDee. We're gonna need help.

Bubba: Bubba help.

Scrooge: You've helped enough already. Boys, you stay here.

Bubba: Bubba come?

Scrooge: No, Bubba stay. Launchpad come... Och, I'm starting to talk like him.

Part III: Bubba Trubba

Burger: Hey look, it's Ma! She musta broke outta jail!

Bouncer: That's not Ma; it's Bigtime.

Burger: Oh yeah; Ma's beard is darker.

---

Glomgold: [seeing Scrooge on the news] Quick, give me something to throw!

[Bouncer gives him a vase, which Glomgold throws into the TV]

Glomgold: AAH! That vase is worth a quarter-million dollars!

Bouncer: Not anymore!

---

Scrooge: Gyro was right; Bubba's already costing me money! I've got to get him away from here. I know - you can take care of him!

Louie: But we gotta go to school!

Scrooge: Fine! Take 'im to school. Take 'im to the zoo. Take 'im to the cleaners! But just take 'im away from me!

---

[At the Natural History Museum]

Tour Guide: Scientists say that the Triceratops was a slow-moving, gentle creature.

[Bubba and Tootsie come charging through the room, wreaking havoc]

Tour Guide: ...But what do they know?

Part IV: Ducks On The Lam

[The Beagle Boys have taken over Scrooge's money bin, and Scrooge assembles an army outside to storm the bin.]

Glomgold: Aw, what happened? Did you lose your key?

Scrooge: Has anyone ever told you you're a deceitful, lying vulture?

Glomgold: Aw, now you make me blush. But times a wasting! You owe me ten million dollars by noon tomorrow, or you can kiss your diamond mine goodbye! [his car speeds off]

Scrooge: Ohh, YOU...! YOU...!

[wheels around and points his cane at the bin]

Scrooge: CHAAAAAAARGE!

---

Glomgold: [chasing Bubba and Tootsie] I'll get you, laddie, and your little dinosaur too!

---

[riding on Tootsie's back with Bubba]

Scrooge: Bubba, I need to find a phone!

Bubba: Phone?

Scrooge [mimes answering a telephone] Ring, ring, hello?

Bubba: [mimes back] Hewwo!

Scrooge: Never mind, just turn here.

---

Duckworth: And therefore, in the words of the immortal Shakespeare, "hit the road, Jack!"

Part V: Ali Bubba's Cave

Scrooge: Launchpad! You actually brought us down without crashing!

Launchpad: Oh, great! There goes my reputation!

---

Glomgold: Soon this cave will be mine, unfair and square!

Super DuckTales [2.6-10]

Part 1: Liquid Assets

Scrooge: A day without looking at me Money Bin is like a day without sunshine!

---

Fenton: Together we can turn the financial world upside down!

Scrooge: Do you mind if we start with my clothes?

---

Fenton: [being dragged out of Scrooge's office] Give me a shot!

Scrooge: You got it!

[He points an antique shotgun into the air and fires a warning blast.]

Fenton: 465!

Scrooge: 465 what?

Fenton: Uh, shotgun pellets.

Scrooge: [dumbstruck] You counted them?

Fenton: I... sort of have a knack for that.

Scrooge: Oh, yeah? Count this.

[He tosses a handful of coins into the air, then quickly catches them again.]

Fenton: $1.78.

Scrooge: [looks] Amazing! To the penny! You're hired.

---

Ma Beagle: You goofs! What am I supposed to do with an empty Money Bin?! Live in it, like the old lady in the shoe?

Part 2: Frozen Assets

Launchpad: [on walkie-talkie] Launchpad to Mr. McDee, Launchpad to Mr. McDee. The Money Bin and I are a on a roll.

Scrooge: Just make sure you don't roll into anything. [hears some noises over the walkie-talkie] What's all that racket?

Launchpad: Eh, nothing to be concerned about. Just a little fender-bender, that's all.

Scrooge: [hears people screaming] Why are people screaming?

Launchpad: Ah, the sissies never saw a shopping mall collapse before. But don't worry; I'm OK!

Scrooge: How far are you from the mountain I bought?

Launchpad: I'd say about an hour, give or take a crash or two. Ooh, kiss that billboard goodbye. Launchpad, over and out!

---

Fenton: The Money Bin's full! Your frozen assets are now lukewarm.

Scrooge: Good, Fenton! Every last dime's been accounted for?

Fenton: Yup! Except for the dime I used to make this call.

Scrooge: Dime? What dime?!

Fenton: Oh, just an old shiny one.

Scrooge: In a glass case?!

Fenton: Yeah, but I'll pay you back.

Scrooge: That was the first dime I ever earned, you idiot! Why else would it be in a case?!

Fenton: Blatherin' blatherskite! I thought it was for emergency phone calls!

Scrooge: Get it back, now! Or you're FIRED! [phone explodes in Fenton's face]

Fenton: I think he's mad.

---

Fenton: Uh, hi! I'm your new neighbor! Could I borrow the proverbial cup of sugar?

Ma Beagle: Uh, well, uh, I don't have a proverbial cup. Will a tin one do?

---

Fenton: Of course you know, this means a skirmish.

---

Ma Beagle: How dare you steal what my boys rightfully stole first!

---

Bigtime: It's bad enough that Jack Frost is nipping at my nose without youse guys bloodyin' it!

Part 3: Full Metal Duck

Fenton: It must be something you said; a secret word. Here goes - uh, "Ducks of Hazard." Uh, "now look what you've done!" ...Oh, blatherin' blatherskite! What could it be!?

---

Fenton: [in disguise] Hi, Ma! It's me, Bermuda Beagle, back from being lost for 20 years in the Bermuda Triangle!

Ma Beagle: Bermuda Beagle? I don't remember a son named Bermuda. 'Course, I got more boys than a toad has warts!

Fenton: Ah, the old place looks just like I remember it!

Baggy: Ahhh, but we didn't live here 20 years ago.

Fenton: B-but what does it matter? The point is, we were together, a family. And by golly, any low-down worm that disagrees, he'll just have to take it up or we'll forklift it out of his hide. Speaking of hide, let's Beagle-bond a bit with a rousing game of hide-and-seek!

Burger: Ooh, ooh, goody! Who's gonna be it?

Fenton: Let's flip for it! Heads I win, tails you lose. Anybody got a bag full of dimes we could use?

Ma Beagle: Hold it, you canine counterfiet! Look at this family photo. No Bermuda!

Fenton: Uh, would you believe I was adopted?

---

Fenton: Wakey-wakey. Hello, little boy. I'm the Tooth Fairy, and have I got a deal for you.

Baggy: Uh, really?

Fenton: Yes. If you give me that bag of dimes, I'll give you this bag of teeth.

Bigtime: Better hang onto those - I think you're gonna need 'em!

---

Duckworth: Announcing a dripping dunderhead, sir!

---

Ma Beagle: Oh, I've always wanted a pink Thunderduck! Let's borrow it... permanently!

---

Ma Beagle: If you don't like how I drive, get outta the hallway!

---

Ma Beagle: Burger, if you don't control that appetite, I'm going to lose control of the car! [Burger jumps out]

Burger: [ridiculous order, to a disguised GizmoDuck]

GizmoDuck: That'll be a large bag of dimes, please. [Burger hands over the stolen bag of dimes] Thanks, sucker!

---

Fenton: Hey, Ma! Look what I'm wearing!

Ma Crackshell: Fenton, did you join a heavy metal band?

Part 4: The Billionaire Beagle Boys Club

City Official: This is worse than the terrorists who held the city attorney hostage with an accordion!

---

Ma Beagle: Oh, this party is a dream come true! Who'd have thought I'd be hob-knobbing with Duckburg's finest?

Bigtime: What're you talkin' about, Ma? You've been in most of their homes before.

Ma Beagle: Yeah, but only to swipe their silverware.

---

GizmoDuck: Gandra! Would you believe you've stolen my heart?

Gandra: So is that any reason to steal my car?

---

Ma Beagle: It's thieves like them who are making the world a lousy place to live for thieves like us!

---

Ma Beagle: [chasing Huey, Dewey & Louie] Come back with that cash!

Burger: [follows] Come back with those desserts!

Part 5: Money to Burn

Scrooge: [after alien robots steal the Money Bin] You haven't seen the last of me, you purse snatchers from space!

---

Launchpad: What's more important, a couple of quadrillion dollars or your life?

Scrooge: Is this a multiple-choice question?

Season 3

The Land of Tra-La-La [3.1]

Fenton: [watching Scrooge freak out and begin to make squirrel noises] Interesting...

Allowance Day [3.2]

Scrooge: Fenton, it's Saturday! You were supposed to sign that lease extension yesterday!

Fenton: That's what I don't understand, Mr. McDuck! I flew out here yesterday, but when I arrived, it was already tomorrow. Talk about your long flights!

Scrooge: Wait a minute. You did leave yesterday, which was Thursday. That means today should be Friday!

Fenton: Right now, I'd be happy if it was Tuesday and this was Belgium!

---

General Chiquita: It's your last day, McDuck! For assaulting the president of the Banana Republic, I order you and your amigo here shot at high noon!

Fenton: Is that high noon on Friday, or Saturday?

---

Fenton: But I'm too young to die! And too nice! And much, much too nervous!

---

Scrooge: What's going on? High noon isn't for another hour!

General Chiquita: I thought I would save you needless anguish by moving up the execution.

Fenton: But, but I was just starting to enjoy my anguish!

---

Fenton: Friends, Romans, and banana lovers! I regret that I have but one life to give to your ridiculous country!

The Good Muddahs [3.4]

Webby: There's no place like home.

Dough Ray Me [3.7]

Scrooge: Fenton, you're a genuine genius!

Fenton: Oh, I bet you say that to all the genuine geniuses.

Bubba's Big Brainstorm [3.8]

Scrooge: [after Bubba causes a stack of books to fall down] Well, you get an "A" in home wreckonomics.

The Big Flub [3.9]

Scrooge: [Getting out of bed] Time to make like interest rates and rise.

---

Fenton's Mother: I'm so proud! My own son on Oprah Webfeet! And to think your class voted you most likely to become homeless.

---

Mrs. Crackshell: [Reading a telegram from Fenton] Dear Mama, if you thought my head was in the clouds before, you should see me now. Your ever-loving and free-floating son, Fenton. P.S. HEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEELP!

Blue Collar Scrooge [3.11]

Scrooge: Always be ready for surprises when you work for Scrooge McDuck! Got it, Beaver?

Beaglemania [3.12]

Scrooge: Well, you're no-good, low-down degenerates who belong behind bars, but... keep up the good work!

---

Ma Beagle: Just shut up and suffer for your art!

Yuppy Ducks [3.13]

Dr. von Swine: Now I must go! I have a one o'clock beak transplant, and I can't keep the patient waiting or she won't pay for her bill.

The Bride Wore Stripes [3.14]

Ma Beagle: Hang on, boys! Your mother's about to enter the state of matrimony!

Burger: Is that the state near Minny-soty?

---

Ma Beagle: Don't I get a kiss goodnight? [Puckers up]

Scrooge: I'd rather plant a wet one on Swamu the Whale!

---

Duckworth: One more precious family moment, and I may upchuck.

---

Big Time Beagle: What are we gonna do, Daddy Scroogey?

Burger Beagle: Yeah, nothing personal, but we hates living here!

Scrooge: I hate having you here. But I'm afraid your mother and I are in this 'til death do us part... [rubs his hands together] which suddenly gives me a perfectly demented idea.

Burger Beagle: Ooh, those are our favorite kind!

The Masked Mallard [3.17]

Laurence Loudmouth: We don't need facts, we're in television!

Season 4

Attack of the Metal Mites [4.2]

Scrooge: I'm allergic to money, you know. All I have to do is touch it and I break out into a rash of cash!

---

Glomgold: You understand what to do?

Dijon: Perfectly, Mr. Gleamgold. I mean, Goldheart. Heartburn?

Glomgold: Glomgold, you brick-brain!

Dijon: You are very perceptive, sir. Most people are not aware of Dijon's brain.

---

Scrooge: There's one mite missing! It could multiply!

---

[Gizmoduck gets distracted while he is supposed to be rescuing a man from a crumbling platform. He finally saves the panicked guy in the nick of time by flying up with his propeller]

Gizmoduck: [points to his propeller helmet] And I bet you thought my head was only filled with brains!

Rescued Citizen: Oh, I would never think that!

---

Scrooge: Fenton, don't you think it's time you went and called your friend? [winks repeatedly]

Fenton: I think I oughta call a doctor, looks like you got somethin' in your eye!

The Duck Who Knew Too Much [4.3]

Fenton: [on climbing under a moving train] Kids, don't try this at home!

---

Scrooge: Waiter! There's an airplane in my soup!

---

Fenton: If I have to, I'll save Mr. McDuck's money armed only with my wits! And no cracks about going into battle unarmed!

---

Ma Crackshell: [watching a soap opera] Oh, Valerie, don't marry Drake! He's a cad, a scoundrel; not to mention he's a beakened gizzard.

The Golden Goose [4.6-7]

Part I

Webby: Duckworth! Have you seen Hewey, Dewey and Louie?

Duckworth: No, Miss Webigail, my morning has been quite calm.

Part II

Scrooge: Me Wallet! Stop that thief! Don't let that sneak get away! Dijon!

Comic stories

Glomgold: I know that Scrooge. I bet he's going to steal the sidewalks... or change the traffic lights, from red and green to vermillion and polka dot.

---

Glomgold: And who are you, little lady?

Magica: I'm no lady, I'm Magica DeSpell, the most evil sorceress in the world, and Scrooge's worst enemy.

Glomgold: I'm sorry, but I'm Scrooge's worst enemy.

Magica: Ha! I'm twice the enemy you are. I hate him.

Glomgold: Well, I hate him more than you do!

Magica: Yeah? Well, I hate him more than ring-around-the-cauldron!

Glomgold: I hate him more than an I.R.S. audit in August!

Magica: I'll turn you into a tongue-tied tree toad, you old buzzard. I'm more evil than ten of you!

---

Fair official: Scrooge McDuck, you didn't pay for your rides on the ferris wheel, airplane, or water slide. You owe us two dollars and fifty-nine cents!

Scrooge: Just for three little rides? [sigh] I could've bought seven new hats for the price of this one! [double sigh]

---

Baggy: Scroogie got hold of some kind of treasure map, and he's taking off with his nephews tomorrow for the Artichoke!

Bigtime: Not the Artichoke, idiot! The Arctic!

Baggy: So? What's the difference?

Bigtime: The Arctic is an ocean and an artichoke is a vegetable, dimwit!

Baggy: Boy, are you smart! It's no wonder they call you Bigtime around here!

Bigtime: They'll be calling you "Toothless" if you don't put me down!

---

Glomgold: I've signed a whopping million dollar contract to write a book on my space odyssey! I'll make even more on the movie rights!

Scrooge: Burst me bagpipes and tan me tartans! If it wasn't for me, you'd still be stuck on that miserable planet!

Glomgold: I'm a fair man... I'll give you a one-line mention in the book!

---

Scrooge: [when aliens steal his cuff links] Oh no, you don't! Not unless you've got eightteen quadrillion bucks! And FIFTY CENTS!

---

Launchpad: Trapezium can be synthesized out of almost anything! Trouble is, it's not usually worth the effort! You can pick 'em up for a nickel over in St. Canard! I know this screwy duck and his daughter over there...

---

Scrooge: Hold still, Magica! I get extra points for evil sorceress in this game!

---

Fenton: Yipes! What do I do next? I'm no Launchpad! I can't fly!"

---

Baggy: Geez! I ain't scrubbed so much since the reform school graduation dance!

---

Scrooge: Confound you, Launchpad! You knocked the top off another pyramid!

Launchpad: [gulp] Sorry, sir! At least now they're a matched set!

---

Launchpad: $6.17? You dragged me away from my nap just to collect a dinky sum like that?

---

Scrooge: [as Magica tries to steal his Number One Dime] Why, oh why couldn't that woman have a fetish for rutabagas, or something?

---

Glomgold: What's this world coming to when you'd rather watch TV than argue with your greatest enemy?

---

Magica: It's not nice to fire at a lady! And it's incredibly stupid to shoot at a witch!

---

Scrooge: You let us go right now or I'm going to buy this place and tear it down to build hamburger stands!

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