Cynthia Heimel (born 1947 in Philadelphia) is a feminist humorist writer from Oakland, California. She is a columnist and the author of satirical books primarily aimed at a female readership and known for their unusual titles, as well as a playwright and television writer.
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- When in doubt, make a fool of yourself. There is a microscopically thin line between being brilliantly creative and acting like the most gigantic idiot on earth. So what the hell, leap.
- "Lower Manhattan Survival Tactics" in The Village Voice (1983)