Ctrl+Alt+Del

Ctrl+Alt+Del (CAD) is a gaming-related webcomic written by Tim Buckley, known online as Absath.

2002

• Ethan: A talking, flying bottle of booze? Great, I've fucking snapped.

11/15/2002, Uh Oh

• Ethan: And yet, if I were to sneak in at night and plant an axe into your skull, I would go to jail. How is that justice?!

12/06/2002, The Last Straw

2003

• Lucas: No! Fuck you! I am NOT downloading 160GB of porn for you!

01/03/2003, And Then There Was None

• Ethan: See, you're cute. You can't be a cute girl and play video games. This would tear the fabric of the universe.

01/15/2003, I...Uh...Slipped

• Grisham J. Hardbottle, P.I.: Like a tree, cut down in its prime, I was stumped.

02/01/2003 Case 132: Part 1

• Ethan: A part of me has died today. It's all Britney Spears' fault.

02/26/2003, End of an Era

2004

• Lucas: "...And then every single one of my brain cells cried out in joyful unison, that they would be spared further torment at the hands of this fucknut-saturated environment."

02/25/2004, Down in Flames

• Casey Collins: Girls aren't objects. They're people too. Treat them as such. Because remember - It's pretty fucking hard to play video games with broken thumbs!

03/20/2004, Functional Thumbs

• Lucas: You have an incredible ability to make me feel remarkably less self-conscious about my own geekiness.

06/30/2004, Whatever a Spider Can

• Ethan: Who dares knock on my door when I'm doing stuff, so that I have to get up, and stop doing stuff?

08/16/2004, Issue 124 And a Half

2005

• Chef Brian: Yes Clancy! My existential shell is filled with the dreams of wild chipmunks! Thank you for asking!

02/16/2005, Hot Consternation

• Lilah: I'm going to die at the hands of an X-Box.. how embarrassing.

07/11/2005, I Blend Stuff

• Emma: Maybe if rock-climbing required a directional pad, you'd be more willing. Oh, maybe we can find a video game that lets us pretend to be out doing something exciting.

11/16/2005, Moving Mountains

2006

• Zeke: Relax, I'm not going to squash your skull with a single hand or anything like that.

07/08/2006, Full Speed Ahead!

• Ethan: Phone, pillow says he'll suffocate me if you don't shut the hell up. I'm being held hostage by the bed linens. My life is in your hands, phone.

10/02/2006, Fuel For the Fire

• Ethan: Books are only for deaf and blind people that can't enjoy movies.

11/11/2006, Digital Rules

2007

• Lucas: A gaming religion, eh? That sounds like another excuse to wear a silly hat and get himself or our personal belongings broken.

02/02/2007, It's a Wash

• Ethan: Demos are like conjugal visits. They give you a taste and then snatch it away, leaving you wanting more.

02/10/2007, Very Much Like

2008

• Home Depot Employee: Yep, I've got just what you're looking for. This is our Colombian Drug Lord series of balcony railings and window frames. They all come equipped with stylish tie-hooks for easy access should you, your family, or a raiding law enforcement agency want to rappel down to a lower level instead of using the stairs. No villa hideout should be without them!

03/21/2008, They Come From Somewhere...

• Zeke: This is all backwards. Humans are supposed to be my bitches.

07/02/2008, Silent Treatment

2009

• Ethan: This is five liters, man. That's like a hundred of our American gallons.

01/26/2009, Renovations

• Ethan: That's the 'idiot tax'. It's our fee for having to put up with your stupid questions.

03/18/2009, No Taxation Without Justification

• Mickey: I've never sarcasmed someone into a coma before, but I'm up for the challenge.

04/13/2009, That's Fair

External links

• Ctrl+Alt+Del