Captain Underpants: The First Epic Movie

2017 animated film by David Soren

Captain Underpants: The First Epic Movie is a 2017 American 3D computer-animated superhero-science fiction comedy film about two imaginative elementary school prankster students who hypnotize their mean-spirited principal into thinking he is Captain Underpants, a hero in comic books they write together. The film premiered on May 21, 2017 in Los Angeles and was released on June 2, 2017 in 3D and 2D in the United States and Canada.

Directed by David Soren and written by Nicholas Stoller, based on the children's novel series Captain Underpants by Dav Pilkey.

Benjamin "Benny" Krupp/Captain UnderpantsEdit

  • Krupp: I've told you two a thousand times not to draw these idiotic comics!
  • Krupp: In my office NOW!!!!!! 
  • Krupp: This morning's school sign is supposed to read "Sewage Plant Field Trips are Today". So can either of you explain why it now reads... [pulls up the blinds revealing the school sign] "COME SEE MY HAIRY ARMPITS"?!?
  • Krupp: Why am I soaking wet?!
  • Captain Underpants: How many A's are there in "Tra-la-la"? I'll just go with 11.
  • Captain Underpants: Now, this is how you run a school!
  • Captain Underpants: Now, I take to the sky like an ostrich!
  • Krupp: For 4 long years, you 2 have been disrupting the carefully calibrated, drone-like beehive, that this elementary school is supposed to be. I may not be able to prove it yet. I'm gonna get you two, one day. One day, very, very soon.
  • Krupp: Ever since you've attended this elementary school, you've been responsible for one prank after another.
  • Captain Underpants: Tra-La-Laaaaaaaaaaa!
  • Captain Underpants: Let's see. Underpants, check. [his underwear is tight] Captain, also check. I'm pretty sure I'm Captain Underpants.
  • Krupp: WHERE'S THE RESPECT?! I AM YOUR PRINCIPAL!!
  • Krupp: GEORGE!!!!!! HAROLD!!!!!!
  • Krupp: You boys are in big trouble! [stuttering] I-I-I-I don't know how big yet, b-but I– [falls into a lawn chair] AH! WHY DOES THIS KEEP HAPPENING?! Where are my clothes?! Where are they?!

George BeardEdit

  • Hi, I'm George Beard. And this is my best friend Harold Hutchins.
  • Why are the robots shooting other robots?! Aren't they supposed to be friends?!
  • Put the pen down, Mr. Krupp, or we'll hypnotize you!
  • When I snap my fingers, you will obey our every command!
  • I DON'T GET IT! I really thought breaking that ring would get rid of his powers!
  • Wow, he is super dumb.
  • [noticing Harold favors dolphins] Wait, what? Why are you always sneaking dolphins into the movie?

Harold HutchinsEdit

  • Here we just hang out and make comics and try to make each other laugh.
  • George, do something!
  • Captain Underpants, you can't actually fly!
  • [about Professor Poopypants] Yeah, it's like he's even more of a villain than Krupp.
  • Yeah, when it's cuddled together like that you really get the sense of the scope.
  • Because this is the future! The future always has robots.
  • HERE WE GO AGAIN!!!

Professor PoopypantsEdit

  • A science teacher? THE PERFECT COVER!!! [laughs evilly]
  • YOU KEEP YOUR STUPID AWARD! I don't want it anymore!
  • Hiya, class! I'm your cool new teacher, not some scary guy with a secret evil agenda.
  • Yeah, scram, okay? We're closed for Ebola.
  • It can't be! Their Hahaguffawchuckleamaluses, THEY'RE ENORMOUS!!
  • WHY DON'T YOU GO ON AND INVENT YOUR OWN SHRINKING AND ENLARGING RAY IF YOU THINK YOU'RE SO SMART?! [calms down, noticing everyone staring] How much of that was out loud?

Melvin SneedlyEdit

  • I will now demonstrate, a prototype which I call, the Robotic Sock Matcher. [pushes button to match a pair of socks] Never waste time matching your own socks.
  • My personal favorite, the Binder Binder. Having trouble organizing your binders? Well, look no further than this giant binder for binders. [slams binder shut]
  • I call him the Tattle Turtle 200. On the outside, he resembles a turtle. But on the inside... [pulls turtle's head off] Oh, look a this. IT'S A NANNY CAM!
  • [notices other students laughing at Professor Poopypants] What's so funny? I don't-I don't get it.
  • [last words before his defeat] Yikes! Extra credit or survival?! Extra credit or survival?! AAAUGH! I CHOOSE SURVIVAL!!!! [as he escapes from the Turbo Toilet 2000]

EdithEdit

  • D'oh, Edith. Get your head out of the clouds!
  • Flirt alert!
  • [reading the love card] "Principal Krupp"? Oh! Benjamin Krupp, you sly dog.

OthersEdit

  • Driver: Out of the road, bozo!

DialogueEdit

Harold: [whispering] George, do something!
George: [As Krupp is signing the classroom change paperwork, George jumps on his desk] Put the pen down, Mr. Krupp, or we'll hypnotize you!
Krupp: What?!
Harold: What?
George: [to Harold] You said do something!
Krupp: [looking at the 3D Hypno-Ring] What is that?
George: [in a cartoon] Forged from the molten plastic of Shandong, China. In the lowest floor of the darkest basement where only toy prizes dare be made... exists the most powerful item ever to be found a box of Frosted Sugar Doodles. [back in reality] The Hypno-Ring.
Krupp: Hypnotize me with that piece of plastic junk? [laughs]
Harold: [to George] Does that really work?
George: [to Harold] What do you think? I got it out of a cereal box! [to Krupp] I'm warning you! If you don't do what we say, you're gonna get really sleepy!
Krupp: Oh, will I? I'll get sleepy? [laughs]] With that thing pointing at me? [staring deeper into the ring] It's now making me sleepy. [yawns; staring even deeper] I'm not gonna get sleepy from... Whoa! [a globe starts spinning and floating, then Krupp, George, Harold and everything else starts floating as well]] What, What kind of plastic hokum is this?
Harold: Whoa! What's happening?
George: I don't know! Why are we floating?
[a spiral appears in Mr. Krupp's eyes, causing every thing to stop floating. Principle Krupp bangs his head on his desk and falls back, but George and Harold land in their seats.]
Harold: What was that?
George: I don't know. I honestly didn't think that would happen. [walks over to the hypnotized Krupp and waves his hand over his face; nothing happens; Harold takes the Tattle Turtle 200 off of Krupp's leg and put's it in his backpack]
Harold: Gotcha. You're safe now, little turtle. [the turtle makes a cute noise]
George: [over Krupp] When I snap my fingers, you will obey our every command.
Harold: Wait, how do you know this?
George: I don't know. I just say the first thing that comes to my mind with great authority. [to Krupp] You are now a chicken!
[George snaps his fingers. Mr. Krupp starts acting like a chicken]
Harold Hutchins: It worked! He's a chicken. Lemme try, lemme try. [to Krupp] You're a monkey.
[Harold snaps his fingers. Mr. Krupp starts acting like a monkey]
Harold Hutchins: Oh, look at him! He's a monkey!
[George and Harold pull up a Captain Underpants comic, and that gives them an idea]
George and Harold: You are now the greatest superhero of all time, the amazing Captain Underpants! [they snap their fingers]
Captain Underpants: Tra-La-Laaaaaaaaaaa!

Harold Hutchins: We gotta stop him.
George: Why?
Captain Underpants: [after getting almost hit by a car] Huzzah!
Driver: Out of the road, bozo!
Captain Underpants: Why, thank you, vehicle person! [jumps over a fence] Ow!
George: Yeah, we should probably go get him.

Captain Underpants: Poor soul, you are trapped in some sort of invisible box-like prison. What's that? I can't hear you, but I see your tears.
Harold: [chuckles] Is it okay that I'm kind of loving this?
George: Yes and no. But mostly yes.
Captain Underpants: Fear not, I will set you free! [accidentally punches the mime]
Mime: OW!
Harold/George: Ooh!
Mime: What is wrong with you?!
Captain Underpants: Ah, that's better. I can hear you now.
Harold: Sorry, sorry, we're so sorry. [tosses a coin into the Mime's tip jar]

Harold: Um, excuse me, Professor P. Why are you trying to get rid of laughter? Isn't laughter the best medicine?
Professor P.: [shouts at Harold] MEDICINE is the best medicine! So
Harold: [hides behind his desk] Yeesh.
Professor P.: What?
George: What does the P stand for?
Professor P.: Excuse me?
George: The P in your name. What does it stand for?
Professor P.: Oh, it's private.
George: So, that means your name is Professor Privates? [Some children laughed, and Professor P. feels terrified]
Melvin: [realizing what's going on] What's so funny? I don't-I don't get it. [Professor P. jumps on a table, causing children to be shocked]
Professor P.: Principal's office, now! [to Harold] You too!
George: Why him?
Professor P.: Because your friendship and shared sense of humor irritates me and MUST BE DESTROYED!

George: [scene stops] Freeze! The following sequences contains scenes that are so intense, horrific, and violent-
Harold: -And expensive-
George: -That we can only show using a technology known as Flip-O-
George and Harold: -Rama!
George: Take it away, Harold!
Harold: Okay, first Professor Poopypants gave Captain Underpants the boot.
George: Foot, foot, ow!
Harold: Then he made an Underpants sandwich.
George: Punch, punch, punch, punch!
Harold: And then, they played a friendly game of paddleball! [he unwittingly tore a sheet of a paper] Oh, no! Darn. Okay, what's next? Oh, yes! Then, Poopypants summoned an army of dolphins...
George: Wait, what? Why are you always sneaking dolphins into the movie?
Harold: What do you have against dolphins anyway?
George: I don't have nothing against dolphins, it just didn't happen!
Harold: Well, so what?! We get to say what happened,(putting shoe prints on paper) it's the Flip-O-Rama. I like dolphins! The dolphins are in.
George: Fine. Fine, let's just get going.
Harold: Really?
George: Yeah. Go ahead.
Harold: Thank you. Anyway, Poopypants didn't realize it, but George and Harold's plan was working out perfectly. So George and Harold shot themselves to the top of the Turbo-Toilet 2000! To keep things dramatic, they didn't quite make it. And then, uh... [back to reality] and then...
George: What happened to the Flip-O-Rama?!
Harold: I ran out of paper.(sighing)
Turbo-Toilet 2000: [still playing the 'friendly' game of paddleball]

George: We gotta do something about that new science teacher.
Harold: Yeah. It's like he's even more villain than Krupp.
George: I didn't even think that was possible.
Krupp: Whoa, whoa, wait a second.
Harold: Tell me about it.
Krupp: Wait, who do you think...
Harold: Oh, okay. Maybe we can fix this if we just...
Krupp: Can you hear me?
Harold: Ah, that'll never work.
Krupp: [blabbering] I'm sitting right here.
George: Wait. Professor P doesn't want anyone to know his last name, right?
Harold: Right!
Krupp: Who's "Professor P"?
George: Exactly!
Krupp: OH, WHERE'S THE RESPECT? I AM YOUR PRINCIPAL!
George: Wait, is he Krupp again?
Krupp: GEORGE!!!
Harold: Yep. Pretty sure he is.
Krupp: HAROLD!!!
Harold: How did that even happen?
Krupp: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!
George and Harold snap their fingers
Captain Underpants: Tra-la-laaaaaaaaa!

Professor Poopypants: Ah, there you are. I've been looking all over for you.
Captain Underpants: How many A's are there in "Tra-la-laa"?
Professor Poopypants: What?
Captain Underpants: I'll just go with 11. Enjoying your first day, professor?
Professor Poopypants: The complete opposite, actually! Look at what these little monsters have created! [gives comic to Underpants] We must lock them up probably, like, forever!
Captain Underpants: [as he looks over comic] Hmm... Oh my. This is not a comic! This is a history book.
Professor Poopypants: [takes comic back] What? [George and Harold chuckle from behind]
Captain Underpants: And as such, it should be taught in every classroom. And you, yourself, must teach it. Because that is how good it is.
Professor Poopypants: I don't understand. I thought, like, we'd be on the same page here.
Captain Underpants: Oh, what page is that? I'm on page 9 here. It's fantastic. Look. It's about this evil science teacher, who looks a lot like you, by the way, and he wants to rid the world of laughter, but he couldn't figure out how to do it. Even worse, it seems like everywhere he went, people were having fun and laughing. It was just infuriating! But then, he discovers someone who wasn't. [as Anti-Humor Boy] I don't get it! Why is it funny? [normal voice] ANTI-HUMOR BOY! And then the professor said... [as Professor Poopypants] Very interesting. [normal voice again] That's my voice for him.
Professor Poopypants: Wait, wait, wait, gimme that. That's not Anti-Humor Boy. That's the...suck-up from class. Very interesting. [laughs then turns to George and Harold] You boys don't even realize it but your silly comic book just helped me figure out how to wipe out laughter on the entire... [Poopypants nearly gets hit by a car]
Driver 1: Out of the road, bozo!
Poopypants: HEY, WATCH WHERE YOU'RE GOING! You just hit Professor Poopypants!
Driver 1: "Poopypants"? [laughs]
Poopypants: That's not funny! THAT'S NOT FUNNY!!! [he almost gets hit by another car]
Driver 2: EVER HEARD OF A SIDEWALK?!
Professor Poopypants: Oooh, if I had insurance, you'd be in...OW! [he gets hit by an ice cream truck] I'll admit that was surprising.

Captain Underpants: [holding a file] Sidekicks, explain to me the importance of this secret file.
George: There's a new super villain in town and we're trying to discover his weakness.
Captain Underpants: Oh...
[George and Harold throws papers out of Professor Poopypants' file until they found his name]
George and Harold: [gasp] "Poopypants."
They both smile
George and Harold: ♪ Hallelujah. ♪
♪ Hallelujah. ♪
♪ His name is Poopypants, ♪
♪ We found his weakness, ♪
♪ Hallelujah. ♪
Harold: ♪ He wants to rid the world of laughter... ♪
George: ♪ Forever. ♪
George and Harold: ♪ And ever ♪
♪ We will defeat him, ♪
♪ Hallelujah ♪
♪ Hallelujah. ♪
The angels versions of George and Harold do tickle promises
Captain Underpants: ♪ Poooopppyyypannntttsss. ♪
Harold: [holds the pants] Captain? You forgetting something?
Captain Underpants: Oh, look at that. They came off again.

CastEdit

External linksEdit

Captain Underpants Toys