Last modified on 17 May 2015, at 21:27

Big Brother (UK)

Big BrotherEdit

Gary Pascoe The un-tried, un-sentenced imprisonment of the shallow classes where release is only achieved with the off button. Gary Pascoe. Dublin 2008

Big Brother 2Edit

  • Helen God!! There are 9 of us in here.....!!! It does not seem to be as many as at the start!!!...
Helen: I dreamed last night when I was asleep...
Helen:There's less people in the house than we started with.
Helen: Do I look chubby, I'm worried if I'm nominated as I'll have lots of pictures taken of me. I just won't eat anything on Friday.
Helen: If there were less people in here it would be less crowded.
Helen: You do have 5 fingers don't you?
Helen: I think I'm the only Welsh person in here
Helen: On her G.C.S.E's: "God.!! How come you lot have got loads and I have only got 2.
Helen: I probably sound Welsh on the telly
Helen: I love blinking, I do!
Helen: What is a Liberal Democrat?
Helen: Is the jelly cooked.
  • "This is big brother, a meteorite has landed in the garden. You have 2 minutes to get dressed..."

Helen: "dressed? What as in clothes?"

  • "Yeah, you know Jack Daniels... he does all the magic stuff!"
  • Helen, the first one in the hot tub- (Sun behind clouds, cold outside), "It's just like being in Spain!"
  • "What does insanity MEAN???"
  • "Those infrared cameras can see under your duvet covers"
  • "I've heard that when men's willies are erect they are all the same size"
  • "I don't like telling clients (her hairdressing customers) that I teach dancing because they might think I'm being big headed".
  • "... They're self-indulged with themselves..."
  • "I fancy cheese on toast"

A while later... "I fancy something to eat but I'm not sure what I fancy"

  • "What's in kidney beans?"
  • "Jimmy, Isn't that the name of a baby Kangaroo?"
  • "How much chicken is there in Chick Peas?"

AmmaEdit

  • "The problem is you're so similar - but in different ways."
  • "It would have to be - like - half a trained dog"

PaulEdit

  • "I was nervous and I'm never nervous"

DeanEdit

  • Dean playing "The Look of Love" with Amma singing along,

Helen : "Is that one of your songs, Dean?"

  • Brian to Dean, "We've named the chickens after the Spice Girls"

Dean: "Good. It will make it easier if we have to kill them".

GroupEdit

  • Bubble was balancing the 3 juggling balls on Brian's head as he was reading a book on the sofa and Helen said: "that's fantastic that is, does he know?"
  • Brian: "What if she's (Helen) got an IQ of 25?"

Helen: "Actually, I'm only 23"

  • Stuart: "What's Deans greatest fear?"

Bubble: "Going insane" Helen: "No it isn't, its insanity he's scared of"

  • Josh: "I've had 4 wet dreams... I wake up in the morning covered."

Helen: "Covered in what?"

  • Dean told the group how fans had stalked members of his band.

Helen seemed shocked. "I've never been stalked. It doesn't happen in Wales,"

  • (when Helen was cutting Paul's hair) Helen : "I don't think any camera is on me right now"

Paul : "yeah except for the one right in front of us!" Helen : "Oh yeah"

  • "Jimmy, Isn't that the name of a baby Kangaroo?" - Helen
  • Brian to Helen, "Did you make any mistakes cutting people's hair?"

Helen, "When I was training, I cut someone's necklace off".

  • Helen to Dean, "Can you play the Vengaboy's are coming?" Dean: "No".
  • "How much chicken is there in Chick Peas?" - Helen

Big Brother 5Edit

Emma:I like Jade Goodyear

Celebrity Big Brother 3Edit

I need a big brother I want harry Stell I no I am just 9 but I am a only child so I git sad a lot with out compne

Big Brother 6Edit

Makosi: Anyone who says they don't know my name, don't know their own name.

Craig:I refuse to diminish my character to survive in this house. I refuse.

Roberto: Whatever, minger.

Kemal:I may wear stilettos, but I still have balls.

Makosi: I could be pregnant.

Science:Tweedle dum, tweedle dee, and tweedle twat.

Saskia:Say what you like about me, dog eat dog, let's see who wins, end of.

Makosi:He's got a massive willy, huge! HUGE! - MAKOSI

Big Brother 7Edit

Get Grace Out - THE AUDIENCE OUTSIDE

Get Susie Out - THE AUDIENCE OUTSIDE

Aisleyne Out - THE AUDIENCE OUTSIDE.

I'm cooking an egg for the very first time - GLYN

You better know yourself if your talking about me, little girl- AISLEYNE

Who is she? Who is she? Who is she? Where did you find her? - NIKKI

Hot Topics, Hot Topics, With Imogen Imogen- IMOGEN

You want a cup of tea, darling - SUSIE

I have a code - DAWN

I don't want the fame - GEORGE

Oh Aisleyne, Shut up you moose - GRACE

I shouldn't have been naughty should I - JAYNE

Would you like a hundred quid. Of course I'd like a hundred quid - JENNIE

So we (she means her an Imogen ) said, go on Grace fuck it all over her! - LISA

I think I am love, I am God - MICHAEL

O.k then don't shut your mouth, close your mouth then - MIKEY

I need bottled water! - NIKKI

I'm so cooooooooooooold! - NIKKI

What do they think this is some kind of hotel - NIKKI

I'm going fucking mad - NIKKI

Your'e swines, your'e fucking swines - NIKKI

They couldnt care if I sank into quick sand and never breathed again - NIKKI

I'm nominating Dave (he was joking) because - PETE

You could serve dinner for eight on Michael's arse - RICHARD

Your'e amazing! - SAM

Imogen, if I was up for eviction with you I would win as I'm a boy and girls will vote for me - SEZER

Don't fuck with me fellas - SHAHBAZ

Is this the Big Brother chair....er.....yeah - SPIRAL

Oh how repulsive - SUSIE

My god my feet hurt! - GRACE

Do you think this house is full of Judases? - AISLEYNE

Celebrity Big Brother 5Edit

"You know what Jade, your claim to fame is this. Good for you!" 'Shilpa Shetty "Nah, nah my claim to fame is meetin' you, you fuckin' loser" Jade Goody

Big Brother 8Edit

Audience outside: Get Charley Out.

Audience outside: Brian Brian.

Brian:It must be my birthday! No, no I want to be a teenager forever!

Gerry:I have watched an awful lot of documentaries so I'm good with noises.

Amanda:I hate spiders...but I wonder if I'd be scared if they were pink?

Laura:I don't want to be hungry this week.

Charley:I can't pretend I'm intelligent.

Tracey:I don't do make-up, I'm Trace!

Tracey: Avit

Chanelle:(Talking about Charley) Shit just flies straight out of her mouth and sprays everyone in the face.

Tracey: Phat.

Charley: I'm a South-east London it-girl

Sam and Amanda:Crringge.

Brian: I'd give my left bollock for a kebab right now!

Charley:At the end of the day...

Charley: I'm not being funny or nothing but...

Gerry: I have watched an awful lot of documentaries so I'm good with noises

Amanda:I hate spiders...but I wonder if I'd be scared if they were pink?

Brian: Politics is show business for ugly people.

Laura: I don't want to be hungry this week.

Charley:I cant pretend I'm intelligent.

Tracey: I don't do make-up, I'm trace!

Chanelle: I can't help it if I've got a natural curl to my hair

Ziggy: It's not you, it's me.

Chanelle:(To Charley) Don't spit all over yourself you scruffy little slut.

Shabnam I can hear booing.

GerryDon't boo me wolves.

CharleyThis is when the party begins, I promise you now.

Laura(To liam) Who's the daddy.

Celebrity Big Brother 6Edit

Davina McCall: Ladies and Gentlemen, the ego's have landed.

Audience cheering to the vote: Mini Me, Marry Me!

Big Brother 10Edit

Get Bea Out! [Chants the crowd]
Get Bea Out! [Chants the crowd]

Davina McCall: Davina McBig Brother house, this is Davina, you are live on Channel 4, please do not swear. [All of housemates], The Lines are closed, the votes have been counted and verified and i can now reveal that the tenth person to be evicted from the big brother house is...

Lisa: It's gonna be me!
[LISA STANDS UP AS IF ABOUT TO BE EVICTED]
Davina McCall: ...Hira! It's time now to say your goodbyes, I'm coming to get you!

GeneralEdit

Davina McCall:Big Brother house, this is Davina, you are live on Channel 4, please do not swear. [Names of Nominated Housemates], The Lines are closed, the votes have been counted and verified and i can now reveal that the [n]th person to be evicted from the big brother house is...

Big Brother: This is Big Brother - Big Brother

Big Brother: Could/Would (name of housemate) come to the diary room?

Big Brother: Would (name of housemate) come to the diary room immediately?

Davina McCall: It's time now to say your goodbyes, I'm coming to get youǃ

Colin Murray: If I was being punched repeatedly in the face and someone offered to let me watch Big Brother, I'd stay getting punched in the face.

External LinksEdit