Bad Taste

1987 film by Peter Jackson

Bad Taste is a 1987 film about a small New Zealand village that is invaded by aliens in order to harvest human beings for their intergalactic fast food franchise, but who are repelled by a four-man paramilitary force.

Directed by Peter Jackson. Written by Ken Hammon, Tony Hiles, and Peter Jackson.
One thing the aliens hadn't counted on was Derek, and Dereks don't run! taglines

Derek edit

  • Stick all the bits of brain in a plastic bag, Barry.
  • Suck my spinning steel, shithead!
  • I'm a Derek and Dereks don't run!
  • Stay where you are then, and I'll give you an eye witness description of this, intergalactic wanker!
  • The headshot's the only true stopper.
  • What are you dirty hooers doing on my planet?
  • Well this sure has buggered your plans for conquering the world, eh? Hehe... my friend, the astro-bastard, time for talkies. By the time my colleagues get here I want to have you babbling in some extra-terrestrial language!
  • Eat lead sucker!
  • I'm coming to get you bastards. [laughs in a mad way]
  • I'm born again!

Ozzy edit

  • [after drop-kicking an alien's head out of a window] The old magic is still there.
  • The bastards have landed!
  • [after shooting the alien that was about to execute Giles in the head] I bet that cleared the sinuses.

Lord Crumb's Voice edit

  • That's the end of those weekend cowboys!
  • I'm sure you'll be pleased to be leaving this shitty planet!
  • Tomorrow we're having you for lunch!
  • I think the gruel is ready!
  • The sad news is that we will be heading back to nalak not with six of our co-workers in a state of permanent death. They died today, murdered by some real arseholes.
  • [after trying to fire on Barry with an empty gun] Oh, sod it!

Others edit

  • Barry: I think Derek's turned his toes up, guys.
  • Coldfinger: I think this is a job for real men!
  • Lord Crumb: [Sniffing on bowl of alien vomit produced by Robert] Mmmhh, exquisite bouquet, Robert!
  • Lord Crumb: [drinking bowl of alien vomit] Aren't I lucky, I got a chunky bit!

Dialogue edit

[barry getting chased by an alien wielding an axe]:
Derek: [on the radio] I think you better kill him Barry.
Barry: Jeez, he could be Ministry of Works or something.
Derek: Nah, he's moving too fast.

Barry: Why can't aliens be friendly?
Derek: There's no glowing fingers on these bastards. We've got a bunch of Extra-Terrestrial psychopaths on our hands. Like a... like a visit from a planet full of Charlie Mansons. They've wiped out a small town for starters, it's my guess they'll go onto something bigger next time. Christchurch, Wellington...
Barry: Auckland?
Derek: Yeah, well that wouldn't be so bad.

Frank: This isn't gonna be another false alarm like the Manor Street invasion over there, is it?
Derek: Well, how do you explain the disappearance of an entire township, Frank? Oh! The Kiwi Jonestown, of course, that's it! Drinking beer laced with cyanide from little polystyrene cups.

Frank: Well, I guess we'll have to issue a gun to Ozzy.
Barry: Yeah, but don't forget about his personality disorder.

Barry: What are we gonna do if we're spotted, Frank?
Frank: Well... I guess we shoot the bastards.

Frank: Just remember, we're only authorized to use violence when protecting the planet.
Barry: And the moon.
Frank: Yeah, and the moon.

[after frank had to drink the "gruel"]
Frank: oh christ, you'll never believe what i had to do!
Ozzy: umm... did you have to drink some chuck?

Taglines edit

  • One thing the aliens hadn't counted on was Derek, and Dereks don't run!
  • Watch out Aliens... ... here comes Derek!
  • The Bastards Have Landed!
  • Crumb's Crunchy Delights.
  • Human meat for intergalactic hamburgers

Cast edit

  • Terry Potter - Ozzy/3rd Class Alien
  • Pete O'Herne - Barry/3rd Class Alien
  • Craig Smith - Giles/3rd Class Alien
  • Mike Minett - Frank/3rd Class Alien
  • Peter Jackson - Derek/Robert
  • Doug Wren - Lord Crumb
  • Dean Lawrie - Lord Crumb SPFX Double/3rd Class Alien
  • Peter Vere-Jones - Lord Crumb's Voice

External links edit

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