Back at the Barnyard
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The Good, The Bad, and the Snotty/Escape From the Barnyard [1.1]Edit
- Freddy: He seems nice... or, wait, not nice. What's the word? It's on the tip of my tongue. Oh, yeah, dangerously insane!
- Freddy: Yay, I love kabobs! [everyone loooks at him] Sorry.
- Pig: My work here is done
- Duke: [whining and punching a post] No, I do not want to be eaten. I'm too young!
- Pip: Dude, you're a dog. The farmer won't eat you.
- Duke: What, you're saying I wouldn't go nice with some low-fat chips and a cherry cola?
Cowman and Ratboy/Cow's Best Friend [1.2]Edit
- Otis: Pip and I have this great idea. We totally want you guys to join us.
- Bessy: Yeah, I'll do that right after never.
- Otis: With great cow power, there must also come great cow responsibility!
Chez Pig/The Right Cow [1.3]Edit
- Duke: [sticking paws into a hot pot] This is boiling water, isn't it?
- Female Patron: And I'd like a side salad.
- Bessy: Yeah, well, I'd like a cruise to Barbados, but that's not happening either.
Saving Mrs. Beady/The Farmer Takes a Woman [1.3]Edit
- [all stuck in shed]
- Pig: Gotta say, not too crazy 'bout the new digs.
- Otis: I dunno. I kinda like it. It gives the chance to really know each other; like the various meats of a hoagie.
Hypno-A-Go-Go/Fowl Play [1.5]Edit
- [Otis watches a boxing film, eyes on the watch as he swings it left to right, and then hypnotizes himself]
- Otis: Oh, watch. It's just you and me. And I'm not letting you out of my sight. Why would I? I mean you're so round and pretty and shiny and... [hypnotized] ...wavy
- Boxing coach: Now listen up kid. You got to do exactly what I say.
- Otis: Do exactly what you say.
- Boxing coach: You've got Farmer on the ropes. He's ready to fall. When you hear the bell, destroy Farmer.
- Otis: When I hear the bell, destroy farmer. DESTROY FARMER!!! [falls to sleep]
- Otis: [writing personal advertisement for the Farmer] Let's see now ... Gloomy farmer seeking anyone with pulse. Hmm ... We should hot it up a little.
- Pip: Write he's rich. The ladies love cheddar.
- Otis: [writing] Rich farmer.
- Abby: And he gotta have muscles!
- Otis: [writing] Rich, really bulky farmer.
- Pig: Yes, but don't write farmer! Write [writing] exploding lion tamer.
- Abby: Even more bulky! And write that he has a pony! [writing] Has a pony...
- Otis: Okay, I will read it to you. Erfglag 7 star number sign glarg... Man, I wish we had fingers!
- Pip: I can do it. [jumps on the keyboard] There, what do you think?
- Otis: [reading] Wealthy, agricultural mogul with body of a Tutanic god wants to share his heart with you.
- [everybody likes it]
The Big Barnyard Broadcast/Dad Cow Walking [1.9]Edit
- Otis: Guess I'm first. Check it out guys, won't even break a sweat.
- Pip: There goes one brave cow.
- Dr. Glove: Oh, aren't you a big sweetie! Okay honey, I'm just gonna do a little looky-loo, yeah, that's all. [snaps glove suggestively] Mm-hm.
- Otis: Moo? [Otis wails in pain as animals watch on in horror]
- Bessie: [sighs] I'm glad your not dead.
- Duke: And we aren't leaving your side until you get better pal. [someone honks a car horn]
- Pip: Dr. Glove is back! [the animals scatter]
- Dr. Glove: Hey sweetie, how's my big sweetie, okay! I'm just gonna do a little checkie poo! [snaps glove suggestively]
- Otis: Moo? [begins screaming hysterically off camera]
A Tale of Two Snottys/Snotty's New Pet [1.13]Edit
- [Snotty's been eaten by his pet snake]
- Dr. Glove: Okay, yeah, intersting. You're inside a snake, aren't you, yeah, you're deep in there. Okay, this might be very painful. [pulls on Snotty's legs]
- Snotty Boy:[screams in agony]
- Dr Glove: Ah-ah-ah. Just a few more hours.
Doppelganger/Save the Clams [1.22]Edit
- [Duke has been replaced with an imposer at the Vet]
- Dr. Glove: Okay Baxter, it's doggy-doctor time! Who loves his doggy-doctor? You do, yes you do, yes you do!
- Duke: [mumbled protestation]
- Dr. Glove: Aw, don't be scared boy, this won't hurt at all. [reads "Duke's" chart] Oh, deep de-worming. I was wrong. [starts up a giant machine] This is gonna hurt! Yes it is, yes it is!
- [Duke recoils in terror]
- Dr. Glove: Aw, relax Baxter, the worst is over, yes it is, yes it is! [takes of safety googles, reads chart again] Oops, I'm wrong. Says here I have to flush out your brain hole. [picks up a large syringe-like device] Who's got a dirty brain. Baxter does, yes he does!
- [Duke is mortified]
- Duke: Hang in there, Duke. You've been poked, drilled, humiliated, but there's nothing they can do to break you. Nothing!
- Dr. Glove: [returns with a bucket of leeches] Okay, Baxter, time for your butt-leeching. Who's gonna his butt leeched? Baxter is, yes he is!
- Duke: Okay, that's it! [knocks leeches into Glove's face and runs away]
- Dr. Glove: Oh, the leeches are on my face. [stumbles into wall] Who's draining my face blood? [hits head on examination lamp] You are, yes you are! [collapses from blood loss/head trauma]
- Peck: Why, it sounds like a heavenly angel.
- Freddy: Or a bewitching sorceress luring us to our doom.
- Otis: Hey, maybe the angel and the sorceress had a kid... a...
- Freddy: You mean a sorcer-angel?
- Otis: No, more like an angel-ress.
Dummy and DummierEdit
- Freddy: So, Mr.Jinx, how are you tonight?
- Mr.Jinx: Pretty good, thanks.
- Freddy: Good, now say that again while I drink water.
- Mr.Jinx: Pretty.... good, thanks! (Freddy chokes)
- Otis: Bravo! Bravisimo! Amazing!
- Abby:(whispers) Otis, he's not good.
- Otis:(whispers) You want him to dislocate his bones again?! Laugh it up!(Otis, Pip, Abby, Pig, and Peck pretend that they're laughing)
- Freddy: So, Mr.Jinx, what's the hardest part about being a dummy?
- Mr.Jinx: Why don't you ask your pal Otis? He's the biggest moron I know!(the audience laughs, except Otis and co.)
- Mr.Jinx: Hey, Peck! Some tree fungus just called! He wants his personality back!(the audience laughs harder)
- Mr.Jinx: Why did the tubby, disgusting loser cross the road? To get away from Pig!(the audience laughs even harder)
Much of the original cast from the movie reprised their roles. However, Kevin James, who had voiced Otis in the previous film, Andie MacDowell, who voiced Etta, and Megan Cavanagh, who voiced Hanna, did not return for the series. Others, such as Abby the cow, were created especially for the series.
- Chris Hardwick as Otis
- Jeffrey Garcia as Pip
- Leigh Allyn Baker as Abby
- Tino Insana as Pig
- Cam Clarke as Freddy
- Rob Paulsen as Peck
- Dom Irrera as Duke
- Wanda Sykes as Bessy
- Maria Bamford as Mrs. Nora Beady
- Steve Oedekerk as Mr. Nathan Beady / Snotty Boy
- Lloyd Sherr as Everett / Crows
- Leigh Allyn Baker as Etta
- Rob Paulsen as RoboPeck / Joey / Pizza Twin #1
- Steve Oedekerk as Pizza Twin #2 / Snotty Boy's Father
- S. Scott Bullock as Eddy
- Maurice LaMarche as Igg
- John DiMaggio as Bud / Hilly Burford / Officer O'Hanlon
- Fred Tatasciore as Farmer Buyer / British Host
- Maria Bamford as Jessica Allspice
- Dee Bradley Baker as Bigfoot / Ryan Earcrust
- Jeff Bennett as The Mayor
- Earthquake as Root
- Audrey Wasilewski as Dr. Glove
- Maile Flanagan as Macy
- Chris Hardwick as Boyle
- Carlos Alazraqui as Optimus prime
- Larry The Cable Guy as Starscream
- Jill Talley as Snotty Boy's Mother
- Frank Welker as Animals' vocal effects (uncredited)
- Kevin McDonald as Baxter
- "Weird Al" Yankovic as himself
- Jim Cummings as Chief Big Bones Mignon
- Grey DeLisle as Juanita / Bronco Betsey / Hanna / Veronica / Inga
- Tom Kane as Freddy's Father
- Jennifer Hale as Freddy's Mother
- Mark DeCarlo as Bingo / Chubs Malone
- Patrick Warburton as Bill
- Kevin Michael Richardson as Don Bling / Santa Claus
- Valerie Pappas as Ivana Sugardaddy
- Maurice LaMarche as Max Fripplehoot
- Gilbert Gottfried as Security System Voice
- Jim Meskimen as Horaldo
- John Kassir as Winky
- Thomas F. Wilson as Krouser Krebs
- Julia Sweeney as Veterinarian
- Billy West as Dr. Furtwangler
- Nika Futterman as Stamps
- Megan Cavanagh as Brunhilde
- Tress MacNeille as Great Aunt Gertie
- Danny Glover as Miles