American Pie Presents: The Naked Mile is a 2006 comedy sex film about three hunks that participate in a naked mile racing event.
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- Erik Stifler: (watches porn and masturbates ferociously) Oh God, I'm gonna cum!..
- Grandma Stifler: I gotta pee (walks into the room and Eric ejaculates all over her, she dies of a heart attack or stroke)
- Parents: AAAHHH!!!!!
- Harry Stifler: Stiflers don't fake sick to stay at home and pull dick, we cut class to get ass.
- Erik Stifler: Yes, I know, that saying is on our family crest.
- Coozeman: Is my dick hard? Of course I wanna dance! (dances with pretty girl at the college bar)
- Dwight Stifler: Commence the pouring ( Coozeman and his friend play a game with their girls on how long they last without dropping the buckets hanging on their penises. The girls pour liquor on their long, hard penises which are holding the buckets)
- Coozeman: Oh, yeah! (starts moaning albeit gently)
Then, the same pretty girl he danced with is pouring the junk and asks "Do you like that?" The Coozeman replies the above quote. She then smacks his butt cheek, causing him to cum on three babes in the audience.
- Coozeman: God! I am sorry about that (everybody is laughing at the mess he did)
(The girl is impressed by Coozeman's ejaculatory feat that she asks him to go down on her later)
- Coozeman: are you ready? (he cuffs her to a bed, then strips her g-string off)
- Girl: yeah!
- Girl: GOD! You're incre-! Oh! (orgasmic throughout the cunnilingual ordeal)
- Coozeman: (licks that pussy like there's no tomorrow)
- Girl: I'M GONNA-! (a second before she climaxes all over Cooze's face, he sucks her all up. She's never been so happy!)
- Dwight Stifler: yeah thats an awkward breakfast.