- Zack: Well, this sure is a week of firsts. My first week of college, first Saturday night alone, first time I didn’t get the girl. Well, since there’s nothing else to do, may as well add one more first to the list. First weekend night I’m ever...going to study. [starts to read] Naah, I don’t think so! [throws the book over his shoulder]
- Danielle: Hey Screech, we should go, the movie starts in ten minutes.
- Alex: Yeah, and we have to get there early because I can’t see in the first ten rows, and I really can’t hear in the last ten rows, you know where’s good? The middle is good, on that right side, you just...
- Danielle: Alex! By the time you stop talking the movie will be in video stores!
- Zack: How much does this job pay again?
- Slater: Four-fifty an hour.
- Zack: Ah, great. At this rate, I’ll have it paid off by spring break...of my junior year.
- Screech: Nothing. He made me promise I wouldn’t tell you. Go ahead, torture me, I wouldn’t tell you even if you poured molten lava down my pants!
- Zack: Screech, you’re about two seconds away from a noogie.
- Screech: Okay, okay, I give!
- Zack: When can I buy you dinner?
- Leslie: Right now! [she hands him the check] Thanks! I had a great time. [she leaves]
- Screech: So, you’re kind of like our mom!
- Mike: Your mom? Did your mom play linebacker for the 49ers?
- Screech: Well she tried to, but she was cut.
- Mike: Hi, I’m Mr. Rogers.
- Screech: Oh, I watch you every morning. You’re a lot bigger in person.
- Screech: I know, I know, I was supposed to be in 318, but I pulled some strings. Aren’t you proud of me, Zack?
- Zack: Uh-huh.
- Screech: The three musketeers, back together again!
- Slater: Well, at least we’ll never run out of nasal spray.
- Leslie: What are you doing on my bed?
- Zack: Your bed? Oh, this is one lucky piece of furniture.
Guess Who's Coming to College? [1.2]Edit