Pound Puppies is a popular American/Canadian animated series that premiered on The Hub Network (as a Hub Original Series) on October 10, 2010, in the United States.
The Yipper CaperEdit
[Yipper, a gray and orange furred puppy, has just been placed in a kennel.]
- Yipper: [sighs]
- Lucky: Hey, kid. Feeling a little down in the muzzle?
- Yipper: Nah, I'm okay. A little sore around the collar is all.
- Lucky: Well, old Kecthum can be kind of rough, but he's okay once you've got him trained. They call me Lucky, by the way. On account of my great good fortune.
- Yipper: Well, they call me Yipper, for no particular reason at all.
- Lucky: Well, Yipper, welcome to Shelter 17, the cooshest pound this side of paradise.
- Yipper: What's so coosh about it? Looks like any other joint I've been in.
- Lucky: That's 'cause you're only viewing it from the top side.
- Yipper: Top side? Well, what other side is there?
- Lucky: Funny you should ask.
[He whistles and the other dogs go into spy mode; setting up fake props of themselves. Lucky moves his dog bowl, revealing an open passageway.]
- Yipper: What the heck?!
- Lucky: After you.
[He and Lucky go down the hole and enter an underground room, where the dogs are doing various things; exercising, calling people on the phone.]
- Yipper: Wow!
- Lucky: Pretty cool, huh?
- Golden Retriever: [on phone] Hello, Pet Mart? We need 600 pounds of chewies delivered asap.
- Yipper: Y-you guys talk to humans?
- Lucky: Well, only when they don't know it, and only when absolutely necessary.
- Yipper: Wait! You're the Pound Puppies! I thought you guys were just a legend.
- Lucky: Oh no, we're real all right. If a dog needs a home, we're the ones to find him one. No matter how much the humans mess things up.
[Yipper walks forward and bumps into Cookie.]
- Cookie: Oof!
- Yipper: Oh, excuse me.
- Cookie: What are you doing down here, mutt?!
- Yipper: Well, uh...
- Cookie: Don't you know this a command center? No unauthorized dogs without proper identifi --
- Lucky: Down, Cookie! He's a new guy, a stray.
- Cookie: A stray?! Oh, sorry, pumpkin. I didn't know. I'm Cookie. Listen, if anyone gives you any trouble, just let me know and I'll chew them out.
- Yipper: Oh, gee. You don't have to yell at anybody for me.
- Cookie: No, I mean literally chew them out...with my teeth.
- Yipper: Uh, thanks, I-I guess.
- Cookie: Oh, no trouble at all. Okay, I'm out of here, Luck. Gotta go walk my human.
- Yipper: You got a human?
- Cookie: 'Course I do! Half the dogs down here got homes on the outside.
- Yipper: Wow!
- Cookie: And remember, ...with my teeth.
[Cookie walks off.]
- Yipper: Oh boy, she's tough.
- Lucky: Yeah, and that's when she's in a good mood.
[Niblet rushes over to them.]
- Niblet: Lucky! Lucky! I got something important to tell ya! Really, really, really important!
- Lucky: Yipper, meet Niblet.
- Niblet: Oh, hiya, Yipper! Welcome to our secret headquarters! Secret, but fun!
- Lucky: So, Niblet, what's so important?
- Niblet: Um...I forgot.
[Niblet walks off.]
- Lucky: Good guy, that Niblet. Just don't let him bury your bone, or you'll never see it again.
- Strudel: [from another room] No, no, no, no! You're doing it all wrong!
- Lucky: You better meet Strudel. Possibly the smartest wiener dog the world has ever known.
- Strudel: You've got the diodes connected to the transmuter, and the transmuter connected to the L.E.D.! Didn't anyone look at the schematics?!
[The squirrels chatter.]
- Strudel: Oh, if only I had opposable thumbs!
[Mr. Nut-Nut chatters.]
- Strudel: What, Mr. Nut-Nut? You got it working? Oh, finally my work of staggering genius is complete! Let's give it a shot.
[The squirrels put a helmet on Strudel and get into position on the machine's controls.]
Ready on the left? Ready on the right? Fantastic!
[The squirrels start the machine, and it begins scratching Strudel's back.]
Oh, yeah! Oh, right there. Oh, that's the spot.
- Yipper: Back-scratching machine? Boy, she is smart.
[Squirt is trying to get Yipper's attention.]
- Squirt: Psst! Hey, pal!
- Yipper: What? Who-who said that?
- Squirt: Down here. Could I interest you in a rubber ball or a squeaky toy? You got the kibble; I got the goods.
- Lucky: Better watch out for Squirt, here. He's the best scrounger in the business, but there's always a price.
- Squirt: Hey, I ain't in this for my health, you know.
- Lucky: Don't you have surveillance duties, Squirt?
- Squirt: Alright, I'm goin'. I'm goin'. But, remember, hey -- If you need anything...
[Squirt walks off.]
- Lucky: And these are the rest of the guys. Guys, this is Yipper.
- Everyone: Yipper!
- Yipper: All this to help stray dogs find homes?
- Lucky: And to goof on humans, but that's just a perk.
[Billy and his dad are trying to ask McLeish if they can adopt Yipper.]
- Billy's Dad: Hey, McLeish!
- McLeish: Huh? Oh, yes. Thank you very much. Bye now! We'll call if we need you.
- Billy's Dad: Uh, what do I gotta do to adopt my boy here one of these dogs?
- McLeish: Adopt a dog?! I can't be bothered with adoptions. I need to get ready to show what an efficient pet adopting service I'm running.
[All of the dogs are circled around Yipper, when Lucky comes in to intervene.]
- Lucky: Move aside, move aside! Give him air.
- Niblet: Oh no! Is he --
- Lucky: Playing dead? I'm afraid so.
- Yipper: [With eyes closed, muttering] My person...my person...oh...
- Lucky: Yipper! Yipper! It's worse than I thought. Emergency wiener, stat!
[Sparky and Mr. Nut-Nut bring a sausage over to Yipper. They break it, Yipper smells it, and instantly wakes up.]
- Yipper: Huh? Oh, gee, thanks, guys. I was having the craziest dream. I-I met this boy, see, and he was perfect and --
- Lucky: It wasn't a dream, Yipper. The kid was here.
- Yipper: [crying hysterically]
- Cookie: Good job, doc.
Nightmare On Pound StreetEdit
[Mayor Jerry arrives at the pound to ask McLeish to do a favor for him. McLeish comes out to greet him.]
- McLeish: Jerry -- uh, uh, Mr. Mayor. What a pleasant surprise.
- Mayor: Yeah, yeah, like a tonsillectomy. Look, Lenny, I need your help.
- McLeish: My help?
- Mayor: Why do you think I hire my family?
[Squirt pulls out a flyer for everyone to see.]
- Cookie: What the heck is that?
- Lucky: It's called a flyer. Humans stick them up all over the place.
- Cookie: You made it yourself?
- Squirt: Of course not. What do you think, I'm crawling with thumbs? I called it in to the printers, and they delivered it.
- Strudel: You are a genius, Squirt! I mean, not technically speaking, but, well, you know.
- Lucky: Did you tell them to print exactly what I said?
- Squirt: Absolutely. [clears throat] "Perky, adorable puppy for adoption..."
[Rebound brings a ball to Squirt.]
- Rebound: Throw me the ball! Throw me the ball!
[Squirt pushes the ball away and Rebound chases it.]
- Squirt: "One-of-a-kind royal dog with million-dollar fortune." I added that part.
[Rebound brings a stick to Squirt.]
- Rebound: Throw me the stick! Throw me the stick!
[Squirt knocks the stick off-screen. Rebound chases it.]
- Squirt: "If interested, come to Shelter 17, Elm Street, Downtown."
- Lucky: Fine. Now about getting those flyers posted --
- Squirt: Already done. I called in some favors -- A pigeon here, a squirrel there. Bada bing, bada boom -- You got 200 of these things on lampposts, mailboxes, phone poles all over the city.
- Cookie: Baby dog, sometimes you amaze me.
- Squirt: Eh, it ain't nothing. It's like they say, you scratch my belly, I scratch yours. Now excuse me while I go take a nap. I've been, uh, scratching a lot of bellies, if you know what I mean.
- Strudel: Actually, I don't know what he means.
- Cookie: And I don't want to know.
[McLeish and Olaf are admiring the fake buildings disguising the pound.]
- Olaf: Wow, Mr. McLeish. It's like the dog pound Hercules would've worked at if he was a dog catcher.
- McLeish: This is no longer a dog pound, Olaf, and I'm no longer a dog catcher. Today, I'm...
[He then pulls down a curtain revealing a sign on one of the buildings.] ...Director of Central City Dispatch and Transportation.
- Olaf: Oh, that sounds important. What is it?
- McLeish: Exactly and exactly. When Mother drops by, she'll be impressed for sure, yet she'll have no idea why. Did I mention I'm a genius?
- Olaf: Everyday, sir. But what if the dogs start barking?
- McLeish: That's where you come in, Olaf. While my mother's here, it's your job to keep the dogs quiet.
- Olaf: Quiet? How am I supposed to keep a pound full of dogs quiet?
[McLeish hands Olaf a key.]
- McLeish: Here. Take this. It's the key to my personal beef locker. If those mutts so much as make a peep, throw a steak in their jowls.
- Olaf: Mmm. Beef.
- McLeish: Fine. Throw a steak in your own jowls, too. But keep those dogs quiet. All I can say is Mother better end up proud of me. All this shameless lying is costing me a fortune.
[Lucky is watching McLeish and Agatha through a peephole in one of the fake buildings.]
- Agatha: I must say, Leonard, this workplace of yours isn't nearly as pathetic as I expected.
- McLeish: Well, thank you, Mother.
- Agatha: But I still can't get over the feeling that there are dogs around. For instance, why are my shoes covered with these ghastly wads of fur?
- McLeish: Aah! No, no, Mother. Honest, it's my fur -- uh, hair.
[Holds up fur wads to his head.]
See? You know how fast we men of responsibility go bald. [laughs]
- Agatha: Well, good, because dogs are horrible, ugly, smelly creatures. If I ever came across one, I'd make into soup.
- McLeish: [whimpers]
- Lucky: Wow. That old lady's meaner than a junkyard human.
- Cookie: Who cares? With food like this, I wish she'd visit everyday.
- Squirt: Yeah, I'm surprised that chowhound, Niblet, ain't here, wolfing this stuff down. Where's he at, anyway?
- Lucky: Yeah, good question. I've been looking for him all over, and...
[He spots Niblet hiding obviously behind a small tree.]
...and I think I just found him.
[Walks over to him.]
- Niblet: I'm not Niblet. I'm a tree. So go away, or so help me...I'll drip sap all over you.
- Lucky: Come on, you can't hide forever.
- Niblet: I have to, Lucky. If Rebound spots me, she'll never leave me alone.
- Lucky: Aw, you're getting way more worked up over this than you need to. I mean, yeah, she can be a little energetic...
[Rebound spots Niblet with Lucky.]
...and a little, well, talkative, but she's not that bad.
- Rebound: [as she tackles Niblet] Niblet! Oh my gosh, oh my gosh, oh my gosh, it's Niblet, it's Niblet, my bestest big brother, Niblet!
[licks him on the nose]
I love you, love you, love you! Wanna play?! Let's play! Ha, ha, let's play! Play, play, play, play, play, play!
- Niblet: Yeah, okay, Rebound. Let's play hide and go seek. You count to a billion.
[Niblet runs off and Rebound covers her eyes.]
- Rebound: (counting rapidly) 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14...
- Cookie: [to Lucky] She's gonna count all the way to a billion, isn't she?
- Lucky: I think she just might.
- Rebound: ...999,999,999, a billion! Ready or not, here I come!
[She runs into Lucky and Cookie, causing Lucky to fly into the air and fall on top of Cookie's belly.]
- Cookie: Oh, why, Lucky...
- Lucky: [chuckles]
- Cookie: ...get off my belly!
[Rebound chases after Niblet throughout the kennels.]
- Rebound: Gonna find ya! Gonna find ya! Yay, yay, yay! Come on, come on, come on! Gonna find ya! Gonna find ya!
[Niblet busts down the fence, and Rebound goes after him, barking hyperactively. Lucky goes up to the fence.]
- Lucky: Uh oh.
[Agatha is talking to her son.]
- Agatha: Well, Leonard, I must say, your workplace looks remarkably not entirely disappointing.
- McLeish: Oh, Mother, that's the most loving thing you've ever said to me. And I assure you, I'm just as important as these buildings look.
[All of the fake buildings fell down, revealing the pound.]
- Agatha: [gasps after seeing the dog pound sign on the main building. She turns to face her son.]
You are a dog catcher?!
- McLeish: [whimpers] Maybe.
[Rebound has caught up with Niblet.]
- Rebound: Found you! Oh, Niblet, that was great! We should do this all the time! Don't you think? Don'tcha?! Huh?! We should always be together, just you and me, me and you, you, you, you, me, me, me, brother and sister, together forever and ever --
- Niblet: Stop! I can't take it no more!
- Rebound: What do you mean?
- Niblet: [groans] All you do is follow me around and jump all over me and lick me! You're the most annoyingest little sister who ever got born, and I don't want to see you ever, ever, ever again!
- Rebound: Okay. If that's what you want. [sniffles]
[McLeish is talking with his mother, Agatha, about finding Rebound.]
- Agatha: When I got home, I found that adorable little puppy you put in my car.
- McLeish: I did? Um, that's right. I did. Because you don't really hate dogs?
- Agatha: Well, I always assumed I did, but this puppy is so bouncy and full of life. She makes me feel young again. Now I see just how important your job really is.
[Lucky is smiling, watching the pups go through Strudel's machine in a single file. Cookie walks up to Lucky.]
- Cookie: Lucky, I need to talk to you.
- Lucky: (still smiling) What is it, Cooks?
- Cookie: It's about Dolly.
- Lucky: (trancelike) Dolly?
- Cookie: Lucky?!
[She waves her paw in front of Lucky's face, he still continues to stare at Dolly. Cookie turns to see Dolly flipping her perm flirtatiously.]
You, too?! [growls]
[Cookie storms off.]
- Lucky: [unaware that Cookie had left the room.] Me, too, what?
[Dolly and Cookie are talking in the courtyard of the pound.]
- Dolly: You know what I think, Cookie? This isn't about all the guys. I think it's about one guy in particular.
- Cookie: I don't know what you're talking about.
- Dolly: You don't, huh? Well, I wonder if you'd be this upset if you didn't see Lucky acting a little goofy, too.
- Cookie: What?! That's the most... Yeah, all right. I admit it.
The Prince And The PupperEdit
[Officer Ketchum has just dropped off a dog that looks exactly like Squirt. Ketchum walks away and the dog starts talking to Squirt.]
- Cuddlesworth: I say, good fellow, but what on earth is up with that eccentric bespectacled human and his taciturn dog-napping toady?
- Squirt: Eh, sorry, pal. I only speak English. And, uh... Do you notice anything -- I don't know -- odd about the twos of us?
- Cuddlesworth: Odd? Not as far as I can see. But -- [gasps] Great Gatsby! We look strikingly similar!
[Squirt is teaching Cuddlesworth how to speak with a New York accent.]
- Squirt: Fuhgeddaboudit.
- Cuddlesworth: Forget about it!
[Squirt slaps Cuddlesworth across the face.]
- Squirt: Fuhgeddaboudit.
- Cuddlesworth: Forget -- I'm sorry. I forgot. What was the line again?
[Squirt slaps Cuddlesworth again.]
- Squirt: Fuhgeddaboudit!
- Cuddlesworth: Fuhgeddaboudit! I did it! By George, I did it! [giggles]
[Squirt slaps Cuddlesworth once more.]
[The Pound Puppies are discussing their next mission.]
- Cookie: So, who's the target?
- Strudel: Name -- Becky O'Bannon, 9 years old. Has been wanting a puppy since she was 3. She and Wagster match up in the 99th percentile on the pup-to-person ratio chart.
- Niblet: Wagster's got a human friend! Wagster's got a human friend!
- Squirt: That's the whole point, nimrod.
- Niblet: Oh, yeah.
King Of The HeapEdit
[Junkyard Jim is talking with McLeish about getting a junkyard dog.]
- Junkyard Jim: Mighty fancy place you got here, Mister Dogcatcher.
- McLeish: What? Oh, yes, it's a regular canine Taj Mahal.
- Junkyard Jim: Taj Mahal? Oh, I don't know much about basketball players. I'm just a simple junkman. Name's Jim, Junkyard Jim.
- McLeish: Gee, I would have pegged you as a Millionaire Monte or a Diplomat Dave.
My Fair ReboundEdit
[Mildred has just arrived at Agatha's mansion.]
- Mildred: I love what you've done with the mansion.
- Agatha: I love what you've done with your face. You look twenty years younger.
- Mildred: I was being sarcastic.
- Agatha: So was I.
[They both laugh.]
[Niblet is giving his thoughts on Rebound competing in the Northminster Dog Show.]
- Niblet: Oh, they're gonna humiliorate my poor sis! She's gonna be the laughing-sock of the whole show!
- Strudel: Well, that's the pageant game.
- Cookie: What do you know about it?
- Strudel: You kidding? I was a show dog myself back in the old country. My stage name was Strudel Die Schnitzel Von Wiener.
[Lucky is trying to find Rebound under the bleachers.]
- Lucky: Rebound? Rebound, are you under there?
- Rebound: (from somewhere in the bleachers) No!
- Cookie: Good thing brains isn't a part of the competition.
[Lucky is telling everyone his plan to get the quintuplets adopted.]
- Lucky: Everyone know the plan?
- Cookie: Yeah, but I still don't get why this guy has five of everything.
- Strudel: It's a common human sales strategy. For some reason, they like to see us animals selling them products.
- Squirt: Yeah, I knew a marmot once who got his picture on boxes of nuts. Guy was fixed for life -- all of the pistachios he could eat.
- Niblet: Wow! Can I get my picture on a bag of marshmallows, Lucky? 'Cause I love marshmallows, and I want to be fixed for life, too. I mean, not fixed fixed, but, you know...
[Cookie, Niblet, Strudel, and Squirt are searching for the quintuplets in the alley.]
- Cookie: They're not over here.
- Squirt: They're not over here either.
- Niblet: Why did my little buddies run away?! Why?!
- Strudel: They couldn't have gotten far. They have little, tiny legs.
- Cookie: We better split up. You guys go that way, we'll go this way.
- Squirt: Right!
[All four of them run into each other.]
- Cookie, Niblet, Strudel, and Squirt: Oof!
- Cookie: [groans] Where's Lucky when you need him?!
[They all run off in separate directions.]
Dog On A WireEdit
[Various dogs are asking Strudel to help them with the gadgets she made for them.]
- Lucky: Strudel, there you are. Listen, I-I need that radio collar you said you'd --
- Strudel: Right here, Lucky.
[Sparky and Mr. Nut Nut bring Lucky the radio collar and snap it into place.]
I've boosted the signal for optimum range. You should be able to talk to the whole team at once.
- Lucky: Perfect. Gotta run!
- Strudel: Okay, but I wanted to ask if --
[Lucky has already left the room.]
[sighs] Never mind.
[Cookie approaches Strudel.]
- Cookie: Hey, uh, Strudel, did you fix that grappling hook for me?
- Strudel: Indeed I did, Cookie.
[The squirrels bring Cookie the grappling hook.] In fact, the firing range is doubled. And I also wondered if I might go on the next mis -- [Cookie grabs the device with her mouth.]
- Cookie: (muffled): Thanks!
[Cookie walks off.]
- Strudel: -- sion with you guys.
[Squirt walks up to Strudel.]
- Squirt: Hey, Strooge. About that next mission...
- Strudel: Yes?
- Squirt: I could really use you...
- Strudel: Yes?!
- Squirt: ...to fix my laser headset.
[Strudel is on the edge of losing it.]
I mean, it really works great for the night time jaws through the sewer and what-not, but it kind of flickers now and then, and I was --
[Strudel finally loses it.]
- Strudel: Aaaaaaaaaah!
[Everyone stops and looks.]
- Niblet: Whoa! What was that?
- Lucky: Sounded like a blown Strudel gasket.
[Ketchum has just dropped off a dog wearing a vest and hat.]
- McLeish: So, you found him just wandering the fairgrounds, eh, Ketchum? Wonder why he's wearing a vest and hat.
- Olaf: Maybe he's in show business.
- McLeish: Show business? Where do you get these lame ideas?
- Olaf: Uh, from my head.
[Strudel is in her dressing room looking at herself in the mirror.]
- Strudel: You are a star -- a big, beautiful, odd-bodied, short-legged star.
[Strudel is on the phone calling about the plane that Niblet and Squirt were on.]
- Strudel: Yes, ABC Parcel Express Flight 597.
[Woman on other end chatters.]
- Strudel: I already called that number and 15 others. They're all useless recordings.
- Strudel: I know I could find the information online, but I wouldn't be able to read it, would I, because I'm a -- Oh, never mind. It's complicated.
[She covers the microphone.] (to Lucky): Humans, sometimes I just want to bite them.
- Lucky: Hang in there, Strudel. They've got to know where that plane went.
[Woman chatters on phone.]
- Strudel: What? It went where?!
- Strudel: [gasps] Alright. Thank you, frustrating human lady.
[She hangs up.] (to Lucky): The plane went to Shanghai!
- Lucky: The Shanghai in China?!
- Strudel: Uh huh!
- Cookie: Our map doesn't even go to China.
- Strudel: But the plane also made a number of stops along the way to drop off cargo -- [points to different parts of the map] here, here, here, here, here, here, here, here. And here.
- Cookie: Great. They could be anywhere. We'll never find them.
- Lucky: Not necessarily. After all, we're part of an international organization. Strudel, get on the phone. Contact every branch of the Pound Puppy network in every one of these places.
- Strudel: You've got it, boss.
- Lucky: (to himself): We'll find you guys. Just hold tight, have faith, and please, don't do anything stupid.
[Niblet and Squirt are hanging by the rope that is tethering them over the shipping crate.]
- Squirt: When I said jump, Niblet, I meant from the same side.
- Niblet: Oops. Sorry. Wait! I got a idea!
- Squirt: Niblet, no!
[Niblet jumps to the ground, thus flipping Squirt over the side of the crate with the rope and landing next to Niblet.]
- Niblet: Aah!
- Squirt: Aaaaah! Oof!
- Niblet: Squirt, you okay?
- Squirt: I will be, Niblet, if from now on you just leave the thinking to me.
- Niblet: I'm sorry, Squirt. You're my bestest friend, and I got you trapped on a spooky flight to scaredy land! [sobs]
- Squirt: Uh, hey, hey, come on. I mean, sure you did get me trapped on a spooky flight to scaredy land, but, eh, it's not all bad.
- Niblet: It's not?
- Squirt: Ah, of course it's not, I mean, 'cause, you know, we got each other. We're best buds, Niblet. I got your back...
- Niblet: And you have mine!
- Squirt: Yeah, yeah. Something like that.
[It's night time, and Squirt and Niblet have been wandering the forest for hours.]
- Niblet: Shouldn't we stop and find some shelter? It's getting pretty dark.
- Squirt: No. Okay? We got to keep moving. See if we can find a town.
[An owl hoots.]
- Niblet: Aah! What was that?
- Squirt: An owl.
- Niblet: A wise and gentle owl?
- Squirt: No. A chihuahua-eating owl. Come on!
[They are now running. The owl hoots again.]
- Squirt: Aah! Hey, it's after us! Run!
- Niblet: Whatever you say, buddy!
[They jump down a hill.]
- Niblet and Squirt: Aaaaah!
[They tumble down the hill.]
- Niblet and Squirt: Ow. Ow. Ugh!
- Niblet: Ugh. Wow, Squirt. Falling down that cliff was really, really painful, but we sure outsmarted that owl, didn't we? (calls out to the woods): In your beak, owl! Who's wise now?! Hey, squirt. [chuckles]
[Niblet looks around and he can't see Squirt anywhere.]
- Squirt: (muffled): Get off of my face!
[Niblet stands up to reveal Squirt smashed face down in the dirt. Squirt gets up.]
- Niblet: Oh, what a relief. I was worried something bad happened to you.
- Squirt: Something bad? Why, I oughta -- [sniffs] Oh, great. You and your big fat backside knocked the scent right out of my nose. Now, there's no way I can smell us to town.
- Niblet: Sorry.
- Squirt: Whatever. Look, l-let's just stay put till tomorrow morning.
- Niblet: Okay.
- Squirt: All we need to do is find some kind of shelter while we still got some moonlight.
[Almost instantly, a thunderstorm hits.]
- Squirt: Why am I not surprised?
Rebel Without A CollarEdit
[Cookie is introducing herself to Fang, a filthy, muddy dog.]
- Cookie: Hey, there. I'm Cookie --
- Fang: Cookie? What kind of name is that? Sounds like something a human would think of.
- Cookie: As a matter of fact, it is, and --
- Fang: Look, Cookie, how about you take your adorable human name, turn around, and go bother someone else? We have nothing to discuss.
- Cookie: Oh, really? Well, listen, tough guy. I'm sure the "alpha male" routine works on some dogs, but I've got an operation to run and --
- Fang: That's just fascinating. Meanwhile, I've got --
- Cookie: You did not just interrupt the Cookie! Honey, right now I don't know who you are or where you come from. What I do know is that you're filthy, and you smell like a dog park dumpster on a hot day in August.
- Fang: Uh...
- Cookie: Did I ask a question to which the answer is "uh"? Now hush up and listen. You will come out of that kennel and you will take a bath. And once you're clean, you will drop the attitude, you will smile, and you will help us help you out!
- Fang: (smiles) Okay.
- Cookie: Really?
- Fang: No one's ever talked to me like that. I kinda like it. Name's Fang.
- Cookie: Oh, I'm Cookie, w-which you already know. Anyway, uh, come on.
- Fang: Fine, but I wash myself.
- Cookie: Fine. And then I'll take a look at your paw.
- Fang: Sure.
[Fang walks away as it is revealed that Niblet was watching the conversation the whole time.]
- Niblet: Cookie? Next time I'm a bad dog, will you talk mean to me too?
- Cookie: [growls]
[Niblet whimpers and runs off.]
[Strudel, Lucky, and Buddy are walking through the underground headquarters.]
- Strudel: So, all we need to do is retrace the route back to your human's cabin. Mission accomplished.
- Buddy: Are you kidding? I can hardly remember the ride over here. I had other things to concentrate on, what with that shifty malcontent aggravating my kidneys.
- Strudel: That does pose a problem.
- Lucky: Wait a minute. Maybe that shifty malcontent's your answer.
[Cookie walks in.]
- Cookie: What are you talking about?
- Lucky: Well, if Buddy and that other dog were picked up around the same place, maybe he can help us get Buddy home.
- Strudel: Brilliant! He may be surly, but a dog will always help out another dog.
- Fang: (from washtub) Is that so?
[Fang jumps out of the tub and shakes, revealing that he is not a dog, but a coyote.]
And what if that dog...is a coyote?
[Buddy falls to the ground. Lucky, Cookie, and Strudel look over him.]
- Buddy: [with eyes closed] That was the sound of me fainting, by the way. I'm very, very distressed.
[Strudel goes to comfort Lucky, who is upset that Cookie left him and the team to be with Fang.]
- Strudel: You okay?
- Lucky: I can't believe she left us.
- Strudel: She didn't leave us. She went with him.
- Lucky: But doesn't she realize how much I -- we need her?
- Strudel: Did you ever tell her?
- Lucky: Yeah. No. I-I think so.
- Strudel: Well, how can you expect someone to know something, if you never tell them?
[Fang's pack circles around Buddy who is sleeping in his bed.]
- Buddy: Oh, hey, coyotes.
[Suddenly realizes it.]
Coyotes! In the cabin?!
[Squirt and Lucky are talking about whether or not Taboo is unlucky.]
- Squirt: Bad luck is bad luck. You can't just wash it off with soap and water.
- Lucky: You know, I get why Niblet believes in all this hocus-pocus stuff. I mean, he refuses to eat out of the left side of his dish ever Tuesday, Friday, and third Monday.
- Niblet: That's so the magic flea angels won't get me.
- Lucky: But, you, Squirt -- I don't understand.
[Everyone has just been sprayed with water in the headquarters.]
- Squirt: See? Everything the kid touches turns to wet kibble.
- Taboo: It's true, Mr. Lucky. I'm a jinx.
- Lucky: No, you're not. It was just a coincidence.
[Lucky and Taboo walk off.]
- Dolly: A coincidence that ruined my perm.
[Mr. Geekman is telling Olaf that he wants to adopt Taboo.]
- Mr. Geekman: He's more perfect than Pi. Oh, I can't wait to show him to all of the kids in my algebra class. For once, they'll see that their old math teacher's search for perfection has come to fruition. All I have to do now is ride home, tell the wife, and bring her back here to see her new pet.
[Mr. Geekman gets back on his bike and prepares to ride away. Olaf walks over to him.]
- Lucky: (to Taboo) See? I told you it's not bad luck.
- Mr. Geekman: Be sure to leave a little sign on the gate, Olaf! I don't want anybody to take that dog before I --
[Mr. Geekman suddenly rides straight into a brick wall by the gate and falls down.]
- Olaf: Mr. Geekman!
[Olaf runs over to help him.]
- Squirt: (sarcastically) Oh no, no. He's not bad luck at all.
[Taboo is describing his history of bad luck.]
- Taboo: Ever since the day I was born. Hmm, I remember it like it was months ago.
- Squirt: (deadpan) It was months ago.
Toyoshiko! Bark Friend MachineEdit
[Strudel and Mr. Nut Nut are measuring the pound.]
- Strudel: Stupendous!
- Lucky: Strudel, what is it?
- Strudel: You won't believe this, but if you multiply the diameter of the parking lot by the height of the fence, then divide it by the length of this kennel, you get Pi!
- Niblet: (as Lucky, Cookie, Squirt, and himself look at Strudel confused): Cherry or pumpkin?
[Lucky is figuring out a way to get Zoltron back from Captain Randy.]
- Lucky: I think I have an idea.
[Takes lid off of garbage can, revealing a girl puppy inside.]
- Girl Puppy: Hey, man, that's my roof you're messing with. Put it back. The metal blocks the gamma rays from the dog-catcher's pup-detector.
- Lucky: Oh, sorry, strange, random puppy.
[Puts lid back on can.]
That was weird, but then, what isn't lately?
The Really Weird DogEdit
[Squirt is trying to convince Lucky not to help Rover, an alligator.]
- Squirt: We got to get rid of this walking handbag. He's a menace!
- Lucky: I thought you never met a mutt you didn't like.
- Squirt: He ain't no mutt. He's an alligator.
- Niblet: An alligator who can talk!
- Cookie: Yeah. How'd you learn to do that, anyway?
- Rover: Oh, you know, from other dogs, much like yourselves.
- Squirt: Yeah, dogs you ate.
- Rover: Not me. Oh, I'm a vegetarian.
- Squirt: I don't care if you're a Presbyterian. You're not a pet like us.
[Agatha is leaving Rebound with McLeish, to go on a cruise.]
- Agatha: I'm worried about Rebound. I've never left her alone a whole week.
- McLeish: You've got nothing to worry about, Mother. Look who you're leaving her with -- a dog expert.
- Agatha: Where?
Oh, you mean you.
[Rebound and Squirt are looking for Agatha on the cruise ship.]
- Rebound: That's not Agatha! She's a short old lady with gray hair and big, goofy glasses.
- Squirt: You just described half the passengers on this ship.
[Lucky and the gang are lost in the woods during the sled race.]
- Squirt: Great, great, great. We're so deep in the woods that even a couple of squirrels can't find their way around.
- Cookie: I guess we really are lost.
- Niblet: Does this mean we have to start eating each other? 'Cause if we do, I pick Strudel.
- Strudel: Ack!
The K9 KidEdit
[Pepper is reluctant to break up the tussle between the other pups.]
- Pepper: [sighs] I'm getting too old for this nonsense.
[Lucky is trying to comfort Pepper after she just got rejected by Sarge, the K9 commander.]
- Lucky: Hey, Pepper.
- Squirt: We're real sorry.
- Pepper: It's all I ever wanted -- to do good, get the bad guys. Now I guess I'll have to settle for being some old lady's purse dog.
- Cookie: What?! I can't believe you're gonna let some uppity, establishment dog tell you what you can and cannot do.
- Pepper: Sarge is the K9 commander. He must know what he's talking about.
- Squirt: That guy? He doesn't know his haunches from his hind quarters.
The Call Of The SquirreldogEdit
[Squirt and Strudel are discussing why Mr. Nut Nut thinks he's a dog.]
- Squirt: So what's the deal? Do you think he got conked on the head with a coconut, and woke up thinking he was a dog?
- Strudel: No, there are many much more plausible theories, why, I could spend all day narrowing down the possibilities...
- Strudel: (to Spotty): I'm rather curious about that,uh, pup.
[Gestures to Mr. Nut Nut.]
- Spotty: Oh, that's Mr. Nut Nut. He fell out of a tree and into our doggie bed when we were babies.
- Squirt: Aha, just like a coconut!
I Never Barked For My FatherEdit
[Strudel and Lucky are getting ready to take Ginger to her perfect person.]
- Strudel: Time to go, Lucky.
- Lucky: Okay. Say goodbye, Ginger.
- Ginger: (smiling) Goodbye Ginger.
[Lucky is by himself in the telecom room attempting to contact Dolly at the Pound Puppy headquarters for permission to allow Slick and Chip to stay at Shelter 17. He turns on the device, checks to see if anyone is watching, and then quickly shuts it off. Lucky then pretends he's having a conversation on the telecom.]
- Lucky: Calling headquarters. Come in headquarters.
(Gruffly): Hello, Shelter 17. What can we do you for?
(Normal voice): I need to talk to General Dolly.
(Gruffly): One moment.
[He looks around before continuing.]
(As Dolly): Hi, y'all!
(Normal voice): Hey, Dolly. It's me, Lucky.
(As Dolly): Well, if it isn't my favorite team leader. How's it going, sugar?
(Normal voice): Actually, Dolly, I've got a problem. You see, a friend of mine, a stray, wants to hoard here for a few days and I'm not sure if --
(As Dolly): Now, Lucky, honey, you know the rules. We can't be a hotel for every stray that comes along. Our job is to find pups homes, not to keep them running on the --
[He is caught in the act by Cookie who walks in.]
[clears throat] (Normal voice): -- street.
[Lucky is talking with his father, Slick.]
- Lucky: Can I ask you something, Slick?
- Slick: Sure, Lucky.
- Lucky: Do you ever think about me?
- Slick: Everyday, kiddo. Everyday.
[McLeish is hyping himself up about his new job.]
- McLeish: I will grab that sewage with my jaws, and wrestle it into submission. Rawwr!
Olaf In LoveEdit
[Cookie and Lucky are asking Kiki about her "special" abilities.]
- Cookie: How does such a little dog know so much?
- Kiki: It's easy, just like I can tell that you and Lucky are more than just friends.
- Cookie: W-what?
- Lucky: Yeah. W-what? Uh, obviously, young Kiki here isn't always right. Hey, I know. Let's find her a human.
Kennel Kittens ReturnEdit
[The Kennel Kittens have brought a large helping of bacon as a piece offering to the Pound Puppies.]
- Niblet: Ba-Ba-Ba-bacon!
- Ace: And not just any bacon. We're talking prime cut, maple-smoked, nitrate-free bacon -- only the best for our canine comrades.
- Lucky: Wait a minute. What's the catch?
- Ace: Catch? You offend me, Lucky. This is simply an olive branch to show our feelings are genuine. So, what do you say? You call the rest of your team up here and have yourselves a celebration.
- Lucky: Well...
- Niblet: Please, Lucky! It's a giant pile of pork, for Pete's sake!
- Lucky: Oh, why not? Cookie, get the other guys and let's party!
[Lucky has just asked Cookie if she will be able to handle all of her assigned tasks.]
- Cookie: Hey, they don't call me "the Cookinator" for nothing.
Lucky Gets AdoptedEdit
[Cookie and Niblet are discussing what they plan to do after the party.]
- Cookie: I'm heading home right after the party.
- Niblet: I'm going to sneak into Rebound's house today after Agatha takes off her glasses.
- Rebound: [Runs up to him.] She'll think he's a couch!
[Lucky is explaining to Shaggles why he doesn't have time to have a family own him.]
- Lucky: You know how it is.
- Shaggles: I'm only three months old. I don't know how anything is.
[Lucky is being interrogated by Missy, Molly, and Muff-Muff, three snooty dogs owned by Dot's friends, who are equally snooty.]
- Missy: Seriously, do you have no pride at all? Look what your human dressed you in.
[Lucky takes off wig and tiara.]
- Lucky: Oh, yeah. Ridiculous, huh? Actually, see, she's not my human. I really don't have a human.
- Missy: Why not? What's wrong with you?
- Lucky: What's wrong? Nothing's wrong with me!
- Missy: Oh, really, Madame Mr. Chewy McFluffster? What if I told you your lipstick is smeared?!
- Molly: And your tutu is crooked?!
- Muff-Muff: And you are possibly the lamest-looking creature I have ever seen!
[The trio laugh as Lucky gets mad.]
[Lucky has just revealed to Dot that he can talk.]
- Dot: You-you can talk?
- Lucky: Yes, I can talk, but that needs to stay our secret. And I'm gonna let you in on another secret. I have a job to, and that job is to get dogs adopted by boys and girls like you.
Zipper The Zoomit DogEdit
[Zipper is telling Lucky and Niblet about her love of zoomits.]
- Zipper: Zoomit plus person plus me equals love!
[Zipper just revealed that she wants to train to become a zoomit-catching dog, when Niblet gets an idea.]
- Niblet: Of course! All she needs is a coach! (to Lucky) Like how you coached me from jumping in and ruining that nice folks' picnic. (to Zipper) I mean before you did.
- Lucky: A coach, now that's an idea, Niblet. But we don't really know any zoomit dogs.
- Niblet: Sure we do.
- Lucky: We do?
- Zipper: Awesome!
- Niblet: And if I know this zoomit champ as much as I think I do, he'll jump at the chance to train you!
[Cut to Shelter 17 underground headquarters.]
- Squirt: Whoa, whoa, whoa, hold the phone. You want me to what? Not a chance, I'm outta here, I'm gone.
[He walks away.]
[Squirt has just thought up of a plan to get revenge on Brutus.]
- Squirt: Squirt, you're a genius -- an evil genius.
[Squirt is training Zipper to catch zoomits.]
- Squirt: Alright, pull!
[Strudel pulls the lever on the zoomit-launching machine, and Zipper chases the zoomit as she recites the code Squirt taught her.]
- Zipper: I'm watching the zoomit...I'm chasing the zoomit...
[She jumps up, catches the zoomit, and hits the wall, head first.]
[She falls down.]
- Squirt: And...she's at one with the stucco.
The Fraud PrincessEdit
[The gang has just finished spying on Agatha McLeish and her boyfriend, Wally Banks, through a window.]
- Cookie: Well, that was weird.
- Squirt: Yeah, seeing Agatha getting kissed by some bald guy? Ew!
- Cookie: No! Seeing some bald guy just talk Agatha into getting another dog.
[Princess, Wally's male Maltese dog, is annoyed by Rebound's antics.]
- Princess: Hey, I'll tell you what, toots -- you want to be useful? Why don't you take me on a tour of the house?
- Rebound: Yay! Come on. It'll be fun, fun, fun, fun, fun!
- Princess: Yeah, fun. Like mange is fun.
The Super Secret Pup ClubEdit
[Patches is telling Cupcake and Rebound about what he would do if he was a Pound Puppy.]
- Rebound: Your versions of those stories sure have a lot of bears in them.
[Patches is scolding Cupcake and Rebound for letting the grown up dogs tell them what to do.]
- Patches: If Cookie told Cookie to just stay and do nothing, would she just stay and do nothing?
[Strudel is being complimented for getting a large group of puppies adopted so quickly.]
- Cookie: Strudel, I got to hand it to you.
- Squirt: Talk about a streamlined operation. I mean, come on. 23 pup adoptions in 10 minutes?
- Niblet: It's a compact disc!
- Squirt: No, it's -- it's a record, Niblet. A record.
There's Something About CameliaEdit
[Strudel has gathered the gang together to show off her latest invention.]
- Lucky: All right, Strudel, you got us all down here. Now, what's the big news?
- Strudel: Oh, nothing...except the most brilliant innovation since the dawn of time!
- Niblet: At long last -- a device that delivers kibble straight to my tummy!
- Squirt: You've got one of those. It's called your mouth.
- Niblet: I'm amazing!
Good Dog, McLeish!Edit
[Strudel and Niblet are trying to explain what happened when they hypnotized McLeish.]
- Lucky: So, what happened?
- Strudel: Um, you see, there was a bit of confusion while I was hypnotizing McLeish, and what with all the back-and-forth and--
- McLeish: [howls]
- Niblet: She made him think he was a dog.
- Strudel: I made him think he was a dog?! It was your fault!
- Lucky: Look, I don't care whose fault it is, I just want to know how we fix him.
[The rest of the gang snickers.]
- Lucky: (rolls eyes) Oh brother...
[McLeish, disguised as a dog, jumps on Lucky.]
- McLeish: I'm on you like ugly on a dogcatcher's face.
The Ruff Ruff BunchEdit
[Cuddlesworth and the other members of the Ruff Ruff Bunch are gathered together for a meeting.]
- Cuddlesworth: My friends, we may be small, we may be dainty, but do you know what's deep inside each and every one of us?
- Fifi: Uh, goose-liver fois gras on stone-ground whole wheat crackers?
- Cuddlesworth: No. The primal howl! Raise your heads proudly and let me hear you howl to the moon!
[Everyone looks up at the ceiling to see a disco ball.]
- Patches: Isn't that a disco ball?
- Cuddlesworth: It will suffice.
[Captain Pete has arrived at the pound and is talking with McLeish.]
- Captain Pete: Excuse me, be ye the captain of this here establishment?
- McLeish: If you're looking for the costume party, I believe it's about a mile that way at the corner of "Get away from me" street and "Before I call the cops, you strange old kook" avenue.
- Captain Pete: And a fine joke that was, sir. Broke the ice, it did. Like a solid oak prow off the coast of Nova Scotia.
- McLeish: What?
[Niblet is asking a group of parrots at a pet store if they have seen Napoleon, Mayor Jerry's parrot.]
- Niblet: Psst! Hey, parrots. I'm a member of the Pound Puppies, and I'm looking for Mr. Squawkers. Do you know him?
- Green Parrot: Pound Puppies! [squawks]
- Niblet: Yeah, that's me. But shh. Don't mention that dogs can talk. It's secret.
- Pink Parrot: [squawks] Dogs can talk. Dogs can talk.
- Humphrey: (To Niblet) Ask them where Mr. Squawkers is.
- Niblet: I've got a better idea, Humphrey. Maybe they can show us where he is.
[Niblet opens the cage and all the parrots fly around the store, squawking "Pound Puppies!"]
- Store Clerk: [gasps] It's the great parrot rebellion. Just as the Mayans predicted. Run for your lives!
[The store clerk runs out of store with parrots chasing him.]
The Accidental Pup StarEdit
[Strudel is showing the gang the internet video of Rebound singing.]
- Strudel: I was on the internet, when I came across this video. I warn you, what you are about to see, is disturbing.
[Presses button on her computer, causing the last few lines of "Happy That You're Home" to play.]
[The pups are talking about their past viral videos.]
- Cupcake: I was on the internet once when I fell into the toilet.
- Patches: Hey! Me Too!
[The Gang has just finished watching the video of Rebound singing "Happy That You're Home."]
- Strudel: The singing Rebound video is up to seven million hits now, and that's on this one site alone!
- Rebound: I'm really sorry.
- Cupcake: It's okay Rebound, it's not your fault.
- Rebound: It's not?
- Cupcake: Actually, it kinda is.