Last modified on 11 September 2014, at 03:40

Fred Allen

Fred Allen

Fred Allen (31 May 189417 March 1956), born John Florence Sullivan, was an American comedian and radio host.

SourcedEdit

  • I'm a little hoarse tonight. I've been living in Chicago for the past two months, and you know how it is, yelling for help on the way home every night. Things are so tough in Chicago that at Easter time, for bunnies the little kids use porcupines.
    • Much Ado About Me (1956).
  • All the sincerity in Hollywood you could stuff in a flea's navel and still have room left to conceal eight caraway seeds and an agent's heart.
    • From a lost letter to Kenny Delmar quoted in Earl Wilson's syndicated column (May 1959).
  • A molehill man is a pseudo-busy executive who comes to work at 9 am and finds a molehill on his desk. He has until 5 pm to make this molehill into a mountain. An accomplished molehill man will often have his mountain finished even before lunch.
  • Imitation is the sincerest form of television.
    • Attributed in Newsweek, 14 January 1980.
  • California's a wonderful place to live - if you happen to be an orange.
    • Reported in Steven D. Price, 1001 Greatest Things Ever Said About California (2007), p. viii.
  • I have just returned from Boston. It is the only thing to do if you find yourself up there.
    • Letter to Groucho Marx.
  • A celebrity is a person who works hard all his life to become known, then wears dark glasses to avoid being recognized
    • Treadmill to Oblivion.

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