Answer Me This!

Answer Me This! is a weekly comedy podcast hosted by Helen Zaltzman, Oliver Mann and Martin "The Soundman" Austwick. Questions sent from the listeners via e-mail, phone and Skype are debated and answered by the hosts. Each episode is broken up with jingles, recorded by Austwick and various other musicians and comedians.

Classic QuestionsEdit

  • [Winning question from the Camcorder Challenge] "My friend asked if this competition accepted dual-entries. I asked him if his mum accepted dual-entries. Why did he punch me in the face?"[1]
  • "My sister recently bought a horse. I don’t like my sister. Is it true that you can turn horses into glue? If so, what is the procedure? And how do you condense a whole horse into a tub of glue?"[2]

Helen ZaltzmanEdit

  • [After being mocked for her pronounciation of 'penguins'] "Ping-guins, ping-guins, ping-guins! GET OVER IT! Let me live my life!" [3]
  • [After hearing Olly's theory, as Roy Walker] "It's good, but it's not the one!"
  • [Discussing food] "Ginsters are horrible! You might as well just sh*t in a bap."
  • [Discussing hymens] "An elephant's hymen... that must be thick and leathery."
  • "[About an anonymous person mentioned in a question]" "Let's give this boy a name, I dont know... Eugene!"
  • [About the origins of the limo] "This car is stumpy, embiggen it for me!"
  • [About posh honey] "Gather here bees, and shit on my toast!"

Olly MannEdit

  • [When discussing courgettes] "I like sweating my courgettes."
  • "You are such a f*cking integer"
  • [After being accused of not liking children] "I don't like babies. I like kids. Babies can f**k themselves."
  • [During sketch] "Helen, you fierce tr*nny mess!"

Martin 'the Sound Man'Edit

  • [repeated insult] "You two are a pair of f**king balls." [4]
  • [directed to Charlie from West Kirby during the '09 Eurovision live blog] "Charlie you wang house"
  • "If you can find a part of my body that hasn't got hair on, I'll give you a cake."
  • "If your relationship's that open I'd like to stick my d*ck right in it!"

JinglesEdit

  • [e-mail jingle] "I've got a question/Then e-mail your question/To answermethispodcast@googlemail.com" (repeats)

MiscellanousEdit

  • [what one listener sings to the theme tune] "Helen and Olly, fondle my t*ts!"

SourcesEdit

  1. www.answermethispodcast.com: Answer Me This!, Question Archive - 2008 Archive.
  2. www.answermethispodcast.com: Answer Me This!, Question Archive - 2009 Archive.
  3. www.answermethispodcast.com: Answer Me This!, Best of Answer Me This 2008 - Podcast Episode.
  4. www.answermethispodcast.com: Answer Me This!, Episode 84
Last modified on 4 July 2012, at 00:18